So Criminal Justice

[doeadear]

Child abuse is reported
The Police Investigate
Bail conditions are the province of the police, but they can be so open you cant even go to the local shop
The CPS Prosecute (but the victim and family isnt allowed to speak to them)
SS come around and if the parents safeguard the children from their abuser, within the family close their books on the matter
Safeguarding the children outside the family, is not their concern
CAHMS are involved with mental health matters
GP is involved with physical health and referring to CAHMS
A Charity (if you are lucky) provides an ISVA to assist your child (not you they dont have the resources) through the court process
Then at some point, if you have the money or can wait 18 months, you can have a counsellor
Victim Support - well meant but frankly, useless
Witness Care - see above
Education, none of these things are their concern, they just follow the strict admission criteria, and if there is no criteria for social need, none of the above is taken into account

Who is responsible for the over all picture NO ONE, who helps the victim and their family to join it all together, no one at all.

If you allow the abuser to remain in the family home/in contact with the children, then social services remain involved, so you get more help if you fail to protect your children.

And this is the system that is suppose to help us, it sucks.

[doeadear]

The abuser
Gets free legal representation
Gets to carry on with his life as normal while you live as a prisoner in your own home
Gets months to prepare a defence to rip your lives apart even more
Gets to intimidate you - while adhering to bail condition, by regularily being less than a mile from your home, despite living a long way away
Gets to spread rumours round about you, while you are prevented from saying anything because "it may harm the case"

And this is the system that is suppose to help us, it sucks.

[Nyac]

The system is set up to protect and even support men who abuse and rape.

It's terrible.

[doeadear]

If it wasnt for the DCs I think I would seriously just give up.

I am so sick and tired of this and it is barely started.

Its so long, and drawn out, and slow, and long and drawn out and slow, and there is no-one to turn to, to help you.

[Nyac]

When is it going to court, do you know?

Very sorry you and your family are having to deal with this.

[Nyac]

One of the things to remember is that the system is not set up to help victims. It is set up to prosecute wrongdoers on behalf of the State.

That's why it treats witnesses and victims so shabbily, because they are simply part of the prosecution case, not central subjects in their own right.

It must be absolutely horrendous what you're going through. That's terrible that the criminal has been allowed to initimidate you.

[timetochangeagain]

Apparently, he has every right to be where he is - because he isnt doing anything wrong, he is "innocent" until proven guilty.

[doeadear]

Apparently, he has every right to be where he is - because he isnt doing anything wrong, he is "innocent" until proven guilty.

[doeadear]

yes re just being part of the case.

I sometimes feel like we are just collateral damage to them.