"A lady is well mannered, patient, kind, virtuous, meek, humble and always there to back up her man"

[thefinerthingsinlife]

Another one of my SIL 'inciteful' views on women!

This followed "People don't realise how much power real ladies truly hold, behind every great man is a great woman, people need to accept men and women are different, 2 halves of one whole created to compliment each other."

WTF!

[nethunsreject]

Yuk!

Glad I am not a lady

[thefinerthingsinlife]

She has become more of a loon recently which seems to have co-insided (sp) with her becoming more fanactical in Christianity.

[MoreBeta]

The only word I disagree with in the heading is 'meek'.

In fact I STRONGLY agree with the following sentence.

"A gentleman is well mannered, patient, kind, virtuous, humble and always there to back up his woman"

I also agree that many great men have a wife behind them who wields enormous quiet power. I am a not a great man in any sense but my wife is my wise counsellor, confidante and I absolutely trust her judgement above anyone else when I am making a big decision. If she was adamant I was about to make a bad decision I would not go against her. I think/hope I do the same for her. We are a great partnership - we compliment each other. We are equal partners too.

I think maybe that is what the SIL is trying to express here.

[queenofthecapitalwasteland]

She sounds like she stepped out of a victorian ladies handbook! How old is she? Not even my nan (very 'a woman's place is in the home' person) would agree with that!
If someone told me that I wouldn't be able to stop laughing!

[MrsChemist]

Is she from the past?

[thefinerthingsinlife]

She's 29!!

[carminaburana]

'Blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth'

And that you think having the virtues listed above makes someone a 'loon'

[nethunsreject]

MoreBeta, I think you are rather giving her the benefit of the doubt there!

[OneBadAsp]

29? or from 1929?

[SybilBeddows]

MoreBeta, I don't believe for a moment that the SIL is trying to express the view that both sexes should have those virtues, given that she specifically said 'people need to accept men and women are different'.

I agree that as a list aimed at both sexes it would not be so bad; there is nothing wrong in itself with being a 'power behind the throne' type, the supportive partner rather than the one who is out there visibly achieving. But there is something very wrong with the expectation that it should always be the woman who is that partner.

[Ephiny]

I agree that 'well-mannered, patient and kind' are good qualities for anyone to have, and being supportive of your partner is generally a good thing. Not sure about 'meek and humble' and don't entirely know what 'virtuous' means.

Don't see why any of this has to be a gendered thing though, and completely disagree about male/female being 'two halves of one whole' - people and relationships are a bit more complicated than that!

[garlicbutter]

Bless her, she's in for a few shocks.

[Grumpla]

Oh dear. Yet more proof that I am not a "Laydeeee!"

However shall I console myself?!?

[thefinerthingsinlife]

Dittany she's very preachy about the bible promoting these views and is very openly anti-feminism. I think it's a combination of theses things plus the huge fact that her partner holds the same views of what a women should be. All of which reinforce to her that she's right.

[MoreBeta]

Admittedly, it would worry me a bit of this view were coming from a quasi religious perspective. Some religious groups/churches are not exactly known for having a modern view of the role of men and women in a relationship.

[valiumbandwitch]

I'm relieved it's only your sil saying this. I clicked on this thinking you'd read that somewhere, or a politician or somebody famous had said it.

[GrimmaTheNome]

behind every great man is a great woman

I don't think St Paul had a 'great woman behind him' - ergo, he was not a great man. Therefore she should not base her life on his teachings, which seems to be what's going on here.

[valiumbandwitch]

good post from Morebeta

[HHLimbo]

vom.