David Cameron to Yvette Cooper "Calm down, dear"

(62 Posts)
Bennifer Wed 27-Apr-11 12:21:47

Just heard this on PMQ, not exactly sure what happened, so I may have my facts wrong. I'm going to follow this one

Meglet Wed 27-Apr-11 12:23:11

I have it on too (am off sick).

Wasn't totally paying attention but from what I heard I was WTF shock angry?

jetgirl Wed 27-Apr-11 12:27:09

I understood it was to Ed Balls, but I'm listening not watching. Either way, he sounded like a patronising idiot.

Preggersplayspop Wed 27-Apr-11 12:27:27

Did he really say that?! I am shocked, that's patronising and disrespectful.

yama Wed 27-Apr-11 12:29:54

I think it was to Ed Balls. He certainly got the most animated about it. Turned it off soon after I saw that as Cameron's smugness was getting to me.

yama Wed 27-Apr-11 12:31:29

He said it at least three times with a hand gesture. Seemed to be towards Balls.

LilyBolero Wed 27-Apr-11 12:33:42

Cameron is an odious twat. Only surpassed by his little friend the chancellor.

chrisonabike Wed 27-Apr-11 12:34:17

channeling Michael Winner - that'd be about Cameron's level of 'humour'


thebestisyettocome Wed 27-Apr-11 12:35:34

If he said that he needs to fucking apologise NOW.

Bennifer Wed 27-Apr-11 12:36:29

I've only heard it on the radio, so I'm waiting to see the footage of it. If it's true, it's massively offensive.

sfxmum Wed 27-Apr-11 12:36:46

it is PMQ's never the most edifying of exchanges, and we seldom get to hear the worst of it from the telly, quite a lot doe not reach our ears, it can be quite vile

Straight2Extremes Wed 27-Apr-11 12:42:07

The "calm down" was to Yvette, followed by "most annoying person in modern politics" to Ed. But a lot of that stuff happens in politics often laughable softened with the words honorable lady/gentleman

Bennifer Wed 27-Apr-11 13:20:46

The twittersphere seems to suggest it was directed at Angela Eagle

Meglet Wed 27-Apr-11 13:22:46

Shit, it was to Angela Eagle.

BBC1 now.


yama Wed 27-Apr-11 13:25:45

Yes, sorry - just watched on bbc1 news. He eyeballed Angela as he said it. He then said to Ed Balls "I'll say it to you if you like" when Ed protested.

Bennifer Wed 27-Apr-11 13:26:25

I've posted in AIBU if appropriate to get a wider audience on this

nowit Wed 27-Apr-11 13:27:27

omg, he can't get away with that!

chubsasaurus Wed 27-Apr-11 13:34:30


Storm, meet teacup.

Calm down. Not everything is overt sexism designed to push women back into the kitchen. Jesus.

QuelleLeJeff Wed 27-Apr-11 13:35:16

He wouldn't have said it to a man though would he?

And michael winner is a superating sexist fuckhole so, y'know? Maybe holding him up as a humourist is a bit...shit.

BibiBlocksberg Wed 27-Apr-11 13:39:33

So glad to see this is being discussed here too.

The crap being spouted on the AIBU thread atm is making me want to scream with frustration angry

Of course it is sexist. And disrespectful and probably inaccurate! Women know your place and all that.

QuelleLeJeff Wed 27-Apr-11 13:40:30

Oh shit, I thought I'd posted this on the AIBU one. <slinks off>

ViolaTricolor Wed 27-Apr-11 13:40:38

Sexist shite, spouted by a fuckwit quoting a fuckwit.

ElephantsAndMiasmas Wed 27-Apr-11 13:43:11

They said on Sky it was to Yvette Cooper. Not sure but he then tried to say it to Ed Balls as well, probably because he realised that he sounded like a sexist arsehole.

mrsbaldwin Wed 27-Apr-11 13:43:13

Chubsaurus - he is the PM speaking to senior female politician.

Yes, on one level they are all used to hurling insults at each other.

But at another level this is gonna be all over the TV etc today - already is.

I don't want any twatty blokes thinking they now have even more of an excuse to put women down because the PM is doing it.

In my view David Cameron just knocked some gloss off his 'I'm a modern Tory' spin.

Is that what he says to SamCam at home?

He should retract the remark saying he has realised it sends a wrong signal and Angela Eagle should look modest and say 'don't worry I'm not upset, I'm bigger than that'.

Superdooperal Wed 27-Apr-11 13:46:20

What does anyone expect from the man who is cutting Suretsart, playgrounds, child benefit etc. When did he ever think women were important?

spongefingerssavedmylife Wed 27-Apr-11 13:52:53

I think it's funny. I'm sure most front benchers can deal with such phrases, It's hardly like being thumped by John Prescott is is?

Ephiny Wed 27-Apr-11 13:56:51

He might have said it to a man, but in that case it would be the good old tactic of insulting a man by implying he's like a woman, which would not really be much better...

Ephiny Wed 27-Apr-11 13:57:54

I'm sure women polititians can 'cope' by the way, I expect they have to be fairly thick-skinned as a rule and have probably heard worse in their careers. Doesn't make it acceptable though.

chubsasaurus Wed 27-Apr-11 14:08:46

It's a silly remark made at PMQs, this is all totally ridiculous and Mumsnet discussing this in such an OTT way makes us look like deranged harridans as many suspect.

She should have calmed down, screaming across the chamber is not a good look.

80Furr Wed 27-Apr-11 14:12:17

I am totally baffled by the uproar at this. Its rude, cheeky, patronising, yes... But they all go on at each other like that all the time. I can't really see what's sexist about it?!?! He didn't say "is it the time of the month love?" now did he? I say 'calm down dear' to my husband and my mother, equally, in the same sort of patronising manner. How is that sexist?!?

QuelleLeJeff Wed 27-Apr-11 14:15:18

And it's very important that lady MP's are ladylike at all times eh, clubsasaurus?

gallicgirl Wed 27-Apr-11 14:21:38

It's bloody patronising with sexist overtones.

I'd want to hit my DP if he said anything like this and it would be a sure fire way of making me even crosser.

I got the impression that Dave wasn't giving her much of a chance to say anything so shouting was her only option.

ElephantsAndMiasmas Wed 27-Apr-11 14:43:36

they all shout at each other during PMQs. He picked on her and chose to use this kind of language, because he wanted to put her down, specifically.

noddyholder Wed 27-Apr-11 14:45:09

I was watching on sky news shocking really and hugely patronising The tone was vomit inducing but what do you expect? Esp disgusted at the titterers beside him.

ElephantsAndMiasmas Wed 27-Apr-11 14:57:53

Nick Clegg was looking skywards as if he was embarrassed at what was beside him.

noddyholder Wed 27-Apr-11 15:12:15

I wish clegg would bloody jump ship and show some back bone He has made a huge error of judgement probably based on a combination of ego and ignorance


Disgraceful. Would never have said it to a man. Yuk David, yuk.

He has never, and I suspect WILL never, use 'dear' to address a man in parliment. Therefore it is sexist.

and fuck off Lucy Jones


Todays events were bad enough without you lowering the tone. Who gives a crap who's boobs they were...??????!!!! shame on you.

forkful Wed 27-Apr-11 15:47:38

"screaming across the chamber is not a good look" - have you ever seen PMQs hmm

who cares about "a good look" in THC - heckling/correcting/challenging is all part of the debate and out political process.

<Have just unleashed a mamoth rant post on the other thread BTW> wink

celadon Wed 27-Apr-11 15:51:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

StayFr0sty Wed 27-Apr-11 16:01:20

What depresses me is how unsurprised i am. Shine of ham is a sexist twat you say? No shit sherlock.

Some lovely comments on the other thread, about feminists and our cardigans made out of our own hair and whatever. Funny how it's ok to talk about this board like that, but it's us who are the big meanies. Say i posted here referring to thicko stepfords with their hideous nail extensions and their twigs n pebbly shit, i'd get a right shit storm. And rightly so, because that would be mean and nasty and that is why i would never do such a thing wink

naughty wink

What other thread do you refer to?

forkful Wed 27-Apr-11 16:04:38

oooooh it was in AIBU... that explins the response. It's a scary world out there isn't it.

CappaFrappaChino Wed 27-Apr-11 16:10:43

worth a watch on youtube. Looks like he directed it to the 2 females at the front of the bench - one of them being Ed Ball's wife. Ed Balls was asking him who he was referring to 'calm down dear' presumably he would have squared up on him if it had been directed as his missus.

The PM said he wouldn't apologise. Shame on him.

CappaFrappaChino Wed 27-Apr-11 16:14:15

Its worth a watch on youtube. Looks like he directed it to the 2 females at the front of the bench - one of them being Ed Ball's wife. Ed Balls was asking him who he was referring to 'calm down dear' - wrong move Mr Cameron.

The PM said he wouldn't apologise.

Completely and utterly disappointed by the PM's attitudes and behaviours. How dare he pick on and try to publicly humiliate female MP's.

He better apologise. TWIT.

DontdoitKatie Wed 27-Apr-11 16:33:17

Response from women MPs

"Eagle said she had been "patronised by better people than the prime minister", adding that Cameron should instead be apologising for the economy, which had "effectively flatlined for six months".

She told BBC News: "I don't think any modern man would have expressed himself in that way.

"The prime minister is responsible for what he says in the Commons. I think if there is an apology to make it should be for the dreadful growth figures we have seen today, which demonstrated that the economy has effectively flatlined for six months."

She said it was up to Cameron "as to whether he wants to annoy 51% of the population".

Labour's Caroline Flint accused Cameron of using the word "dear" to "put women down", and said she had been on the receiving end of the same tactic from the communities secretary, Eric Pickles, in the chamber last December, when he told her to "just get behind the programme then, dear".

Labour's deputy leader, Harriet Harman, said: "David Cameron's contemptuous response to Angela Eagle MP at prime minister's questions today shows his patronising and outdated attitude to women.

"Women in Britain in the 21st century do not expect to be told to 'calm down, dear' by their prime minister.""

QuelleLeJeff Wed 27-Apr-11 16:37:18

Can I come over here please? I'm finding the AIBU one infuriating!

Didn't even bother looking at it.

IngridBergman Wed 27-Apr-11 17:01:44

The guardian link below references this thread in case anyone is interested.

casbie Wed 27-Apr-11 20:21:42

he is showing his true colours when he said that Britain should stop being a multi-cultural society (is this the way Tory way of saying 'go home you foreigners?'). then, he comes out with this patronising comment. he doesn't like women, the poor or people of different colour very much does he? totally agree with the swearing on here.

erm... here, here!!

themonalisa Wed 27-Apr-11 23:18:35

He really is a pompous and arrogant man.

sprogger Wed 27-Apr-11 23:40:08

Idiot. If he had half a brain, he'd apologise and get on with his life instead of pretending it didn't pop into his head purely because he was saying it to a woman.

PenguinArmy Thu 28-Apr-11 04:39:28

It is disgusting, but it helps to bring out to the open that this government is so anti female.

IngridBergman Thu 28-Apr-11 10:24:46

I mean is there really anyone who didn't KNOW he was a twit before the election? Was he so believable? I don't even think he tried that hard to pretend otherwise but God, people certainly fell for it.

I will never understand why people vote in these bastards and then are surprised when they show who they really are. Not that I'm assuming many people on this thread did vote for him...

Beachcomber Thu 28-Apr-11 11:26:24

I suspect that this will come back to bite him on the arse if he doesn't apologise to her.

All he has to do is say it was a thoughtless heat of the moment comment and that he understands the sexist undertones and blah blah blah. Not too difficult surely? Although of course in order to do so he would have to admit that he made an error and gracefully thank her for pointing that out - that would probably stick in his throat a bit.

Beachcomber Thu 28-Apr-11 11:31:43

I posted this on the AIBU thread - some comments from Ms Eagle.

Am LOVING Harriet Harman's facial expression at 1min11secs in.

It just say it all really. "Hamshine you truly are a knobend and showing yourself up no end."


bristolcities Thu 28-Apr-11 20:48:36

I'm really supries by the AIBU thread, I and most people I know think it's disgracefull. If any one called me dear or urggg...luv I would be most pissed off.

bristolcities Thu 28-Apr-11 20:53:06

What the link Ingrid?

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