Shoes for Women - why is their pressure to wear uncomfortble footwear to 'fit in'?

[TwoCotbeds]

When buying shoes, I am remindeed of the old chinese culture on foot-binding. Why is it one gender ( men) can buy shoe which are smart for work AND can also walk all day, round town in comfort, or over grass, say.... but Women have the only Option of 'smart' shoes for work that go with a suit,and look professional or shoes that they can easily wear in comfort all day - but not both ?

I think this has got worse recently with the fashion for very, very high shoes which actually damage the foot.

I always think to myself, a womans and a mans foot is structurally the same. They are not different shapes, like torsos are. Of course I like to look feminine not male, but I also like to walk as much as I like.

I was also told by a chiropodist that the only reason court shoes ( ones with no strap) ever actually stay on, not fall off is because they are actually too small !

[TwoCotbeds]

Arg, I mean "why is there pressure" of course, sorry.

[msrisotto]

I was comparing 'fashion' shoes (that seem to be the norm for every situation except the gym) to foot binding yesterday (in my head)! I needed to walk all day, wanted to wear a full length dress, too cold for flip flops - what's a girl to do? Wore Uggs in the end, it didn't look great....

I also wonder about those chiropodist shops (Reiker is it?) who sell women's shoes that are good for your feet - are they though? Or are they better than normal fashion shoes?

Anyway, I'm sure it has something to do with the sadism of our pain for someone else's pleasure, along with the happy coincidence of making us less mobile and the scary consequences and inference that holds.

[booyhoo]

it is bad isn't it? my most confortable pair of shoes are my birkenstocks but i don't wear them outside of the house. they just aren't flattering, yet i never find myself looking at men's shoes thinking "they are so unflattering". it's not right at all.

[msrisotto]

I pretty much have 2 pairs of shoes (despite what my DP might tell you) Birkenstocks/ flip flops, and Uggs.

I do have other shoes but none are comfortable for yaknow, walking in.

[SallyForth]

And those shoes women say they find "comfortable" - flip flops and ballet type shoes - in fact offer no arch support or cushioning at all and are only thought to be "comfortable" because the others are so dreadful they actually inflict pain!

But I agree, court shoes are the very devil as far as feet go.

At least it is now OK for women to wear trousers - there's a much wider range of shoes/boots you can get away with wearing with those.

Ideal solution I think is to get shoes or boots that are deep enough and supportive enough that you can add in your own insoles with arch supports for the necessary cushioning.

I have got to the advanced age now where I wear the most comfy shoes I can because I am sure an expression of pain on my face is even less flattering. Mind you, I'm in a job where footwear doesn't =£££ as nobody really cares what I look like as long as I do a half decent job :-)

[Just13moreyearstogo]

I always think it's useful to do a reality check about stuff we do to ourselves in terms of 'would men ever do this?' eg slapping on makeup every day, wearing uncomfortably tight clothes and shoes that hurt. I try really hard to put comfort first and ignore the nonsense that's peddled at women.

[msrisotto]

Yeah, flip flops and ballet shoes end up hurting my legs too after a while!!

I hope no one cares what i'm wearing on my feet at work but you do have to give an overall impression of smart and trainers that ain't.

[BelleDameSansMerci]

I'm ashamed to admit that I adore high heels. I have a very high in-step and do actually find a heel quite comfortable. I can't walk in a mid height heel at all. I like them flat or high. Not in between.

A serious question though - do you feel under pressure to buy shoes to fit in? I wear what I like really although, to be fair, what I like does fit in.

[AliceWorld]

Too right, shoes are (yet another) thing that winds me up. Why do we have to wear shoes that are painful, and I find sinisterly make it hard for us to run away from danger. Oh, of course, because they make our legs look nice

(It's funny cos I though men 'couldn't help' but find women attractive, cos it's 'hormonal'. Funny then that we need to make ourselves attractive )

Personally I haven't worn anything with a heel for years.

[CaptainBarnacles]

Absolutely - I am always flabberghasted when I walk into a shoe shop and realise that 90% of women's shoes are unwearable if you don't want to be in pain.

What really pisses me off is that a lot of smarter women's clothes just don't look 'right' without wearing a heel.

I loathe wearing heels, but I do have one comfortable-ish pair to wear with smart skirts, dresses and trousers - otherwise they just look odd.

[sethstarkaddersmum]

There is a whole chapter on feet in the Sheila Jeffreys book 'Beauty and Misogyny.' She argues it is a 'harmful cultural practice' and looks at the parallels with footbinding.
It's the themes MsRisotto picks up on - 'the sadism of our pain for someone else's pleasure, along with the happy coincidence of making us less mobile'.

something which I found particularly memorable was that she says high heels make women look 'different and deferent'. When I see a woman tripping along in high heels now that's what I think - I can't see them as empowering any more. Women in ultra-high heels in fashion shoots just look hobbled, almost manacled.

[MeowyChristmasEveryone]

I agree with Just13

I DO own some heeled shoes, but they are all, WITHOUT FAIL, devices of torture and I hate them.

My favourite footwear are trainers, flat boots, clark's work shoes - which are often lace ups - or the work boots.

I'm fairly lucky as the school where I work doesn't enforce the staff dress code too severely, so tomorrow I'm wearing brown cords with a blue smock top and a pair of brown Wrangler lace up boots, and no-one would look twice. What worries me is that we have a new Headteacher from January, and she is a "sharp suits and court shoes" type. Aaaaargh!!!!

My mate works in Poole, and she's NOT allowed to wear knee length boots, whether flat or heeled, even on the days when she has to do break and bus duty outside in all weather. Totally unreasonable.

[tribpot]

I do love the contrast when I walk down to our supplier's office, round the corner.

With men, I walk too slowly because they are taller than me.

With women, I walk too fast beause they are in heels (and I am not).

I can understand (sort of) why heels look nice but - sorry - I just need to be able to walk. When I see SJP running in her heels in SATC I just want to say "stop! You will hurt yourself!" I look at Claudia's shoes on It Takes Two and assume she only puts them on moments before the show starts, whilst already sitting down. In effect they serve no practical purpose, like earrings.

[sethstarkaddersmum]

'A serious question though - do you feel under pressure to buy shoes to fit in?'

not now, but I did when I was working.

[MeowyChristmasEveryone]

I don't personally feel the pressure, but I am aware of the pressure, IYKWIM

[maxpower]

I'm suprised that the posters on here feel under pressure to wear heels - I certainly don't. I covet them and think that some of them look fab, but I always go for comfort. But then, I don't feel any need to wear make-up either and generally shop for clothes that I believe are flattering (for myself not for anyone else) rather than what's deemed to be in fashion.

[HerBeatitude]

Am watching Slebs in the jungle atm and all the women are wearing hideous high shoes. They just look so uncomfortable.

[sethstarkaddersmum]

they are wearing heels in the jungle?

one of my university housemates had shoes that were just for the bedroom. She showed us them and we said 'But how will you walk in them?' and she explained she wasn't even going to try.

[didoreth]

I certainly never feel this pressure - but then I never feel any pressure to conform to anything ever. Please yourselves for heavens sake. Actually, I find sensible comfortable but smart (and flat) shoes really easy to find. Try Clarks.

[BelleDameSansMerci]

"Car to bar" shoes - love it!

[tribpot]

Heels in the jungle is just stupid. Car to bar I can (sort of) understand but would never participate, no disrespect to those who do. I assume Claudia's shoes fit in that particular category.

"Try Clarks" - classic response.

[maktaitai]

When I see young women wearing current shoes I want to choke the life out of all people involved in the shoe manufacturing industry, shoe marketing, fashion industry, magazine industry, all celebrities. And my own sister who sneers at women who wear comfortable shoes (like me). I saw a woman today, possibly early 20s, wearing thigh high platform stiletto suede boots. In the rain. I cannot think of a single aspect of that footwear that was functional, except that they had a hole in the top. She looked as though she were about to collapse, walked like a duck, and took several minutes to descend a flight of stairs. I do think she made a ridiculous choice and ultimately you can't force the population to wear Doc Martens, but nonetheless a culture that brings women to that sort of choice is quite clearly dysfunctional in a huge number of ways.