I have a Jonathon Creek style mystery on my hands...

(113 Posts)
notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:06:29

Me and dp had a row, he went out. I'm sat in the study and over the noise of the computer/fan I thought I maybe heard the back door go... couple of mins, bit more banging then nothing. So I went to check. On the side in the kitchen has appeared a bottle of diet coke and a big bar of galaxy. But no sign of dp. His car is on the drive, have searched the whole house (even cupboards etc) no sign. The weird thing? Both doors are locked by keys ON THE INSIDE!!! You can't have a key in the lock on one side and lock it from the other. So, has he done a Houdini on me?....

MyBoysAreFab Thu 11-Jul-13 21:08:13

Will he have a mobile on him? You could phone it and may hear it ringing.

sittinginthesun Thu 11-Jul-13 21:08:52

Sure he's not in the loo?

notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:10:05

tried the phone, couldn't hear it ringing and it rang out to voicemail.
No he's definately not in the loo, honestly i've even checked the airing cupboard! blush

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:10:07

Has he wrapped himself up to look like a huge bar of chocolate?

He's in the house somewhere
Or garage?
My DH is a master of this - I usually find out he was somewhere obscure in the servants' wing.
Is he in the DCs' bedroom maybe?

apatchylass Thu 11-Jul-13 21:10:58

Have you unwrapped the Galaxy? Maybe he's in there.

Suspended from the ceiling on wires?

Hamwidge Thu 11-Jul-13 21:11:55

Technically my front door shouldn't unlock if the key is in the back, but sometimes it does if I've tried to stop family members letting themselves in

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:12:01

Under the floorboards?

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:12:37

In the loft crafting a doll to jump out of the tv at you...

whattodoo Thu 11-Jul-13 21:12:47

Does he have Spidey abilities? Could he be clinging onto the ceiling?

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:13:01

On top of the wardrobes

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:13:12

Under the bed

Are you sure you didn't lock the door without thinking, assuming he was in the house? Then realised he wasn't and checked the doors again iyswim?

LoveBeingUpAt4InTheMorning Thu 11-Jul-13 21:14:16

Sit down and eat the chocolate he with magically appear

Look in your wardeobe. Does it look snowy at the back? Can you hear the faint roar of a lion?

DameFanny Thu 11-Jul-13 21:14:31

You know you didn't think you had a cellar? Well...

WafflyVersatile Thu 11-Jul-13 21:14:32

maybe he got scared and clambered up the chimney.

Onetwothreeoops Thu 11-Jul-13 21:15:02

He's come back and gone out again. The key in the door is a red herring.

GoofyIsACow Thu 11-Jul-13 21:16:11

Has he gone out the window?

PelvicFloorClenchReminder Thu 11-Jul-13 21:17:04

Under the bed?

KatieHalfPrice Thu 11-Jul-13 21:17:54

Check all the books in your bookcase. One will open a secret door.

PelvicFloorClenchReminder Thu 11-Jul-13 21:17:56

Ooops, sorry, Goofy already said that! blush

notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:18:21

nope he's not in the bottle of coke or the bar of chocolate either. the only place i haven't checked is the loft because its right outside the study door and you have to climb into it like a monkey so I definantly would have heard that, and the shed because its tiny and rammed with all sorts (including big spiders!!) so you can't get in it.
Hamwidge I think he must have gone out and managed to lock the door from the outside with my keys on the inside... except I'd deliberately taken them out when I locked the door earlier to make sure he could get in when he came back!
I'm just hope he hasn't been mysteriously vaporized when the last things I said to him where in anger and kind of mean sad...

TheFallenNinja Thu 11-Jul-13 21:18:23

Is anything levitating?

Are there any unusual portals to the underworld open anywhere?

500internalerror Thu 11-Jul-13 21:18:33

Door wasn't locked. He left you the Chocolate of Peace & has left again to give you space...

edam Thu 11-Jul-13 21:19:43

I'm going with Lovebeingupat4, eat the damn chocolate, he'll turn up fast enough. Or he won't, but you'll have a tummy full of chocolate. Win win. grin

GlitterFingers Thu 11-Jul-13 21:21:52

I need to know the answer!!! Where is he? Jonathan creek makes me crazy because I just can't wait to find out how they did it

do you have children?

notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:24:23

I'm definately going to have to wait up for him to get home now because I'm intrigued! I was going to go to bed early in a strop but he's got around that one the cheeky bugger!
Must be the whole key on the inside of the lock thing doesn't work anymore I suppose. Ah well, I am enjoying the chocolate!

OP admit it. You murdered him, stuffed his body under the patio, and all this hand wringing and confusion is part of your very cunning defence strategy

(FWIW I think he will be fine and as confused as you as how the key got turned)

Are you sure the door is locked? Not just a stiff handle?

notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:25:15

Yes baby is in bed fast asleep, older 2 are having a sleep over. I've checked their room, he's not there!

notanyanymore Thu 11-Jul-13 21:27:12

Ha! I did wonder if this might seem like an alibi, I have mentioned burying him under a patio a few times lately... (post natal hormonal)
Yes it definately was locked, I had to unlock it to check he wasn't in the garden or sat in his car

spontaneous combustion?

Dackyduddles Thu 11-Jul-13 21:41:55

Stealth, servants wing...? Intriguing....


Awww, good peace offering and space-creating disappearance. Good one mrnot

kiss the bastard!


Has ths op gone through the same portal?

Where was he?

VivaLeBeaver Fri 12-Jul-13 07:18:01

Was he in bed. I once started a thread on MN as I couldn't find dh when I came back from work one evening. Dd was sure he'd gone out.

After thirty mins I looked in the bedroom and he was in bed! He's never in bed that early in the evenings so I hadn't even looked.

Trazzletoes Fri 12-Jul-13 07:27:07

Oooh intriguing!

YoniMontana Fri 12-Jul-13 07:32:33

Where was he?!

GlitterFingers Fri 12-Jul-13 07:39:02

Come back op I need to know blush

WandaDoff Fri 12-Jul-13 07:42:02

Yes, where was he?

imtheonlyone Fri 12-Jul-13 07:44:23

Did you find him??

YoniMatopoeia Fri 12-Jul-13 07:47:24

Have you found him yet?

LandOfSpareOom Fri 12-Jul-13 08:18:59

Have you also disappeared??

Geeklover Fri 12-Jul-13 08:20:12

Where was he? You you can't excite us all then not tell us shock

PelvicFloorClenchReminder Fri 12-Jul-13 10:31:41

Was the bottle of coke actually a wormhole?

Picturepuncture Fri 12-Jul-13 13:24:47

I need to know the answer to this OP... Where was he?

Oi! This is in the Round-up! And it doesn't finish ... We need to know now.

(You did eat the chocolate, didn't you?)

TylerHopkins Fri 12-Jul-13 18:22:13

Perhaps he came back, murdered her and drank the coke???

ZillionChocolate Fri 12-Jul-13 18:23:17

Maybe OP has gone the same way?

Bertha grin I just clicked from the round up too and this is very unsatisfactory.... I need to know now!

FriskyHenderson Fri 12-Jul-13 18:48:54

How is this on the round up when there's no answer?

GlitterFingers Fri 12-Jul-13 19:32:24

I'm still waiting on an answer blush

ShoeJunkie Fri 12-Jul-13 19:35:14

I've just read this in the roundup too! OP where are you?!

He came back after kindly giving her her space and found she'd locked him out. He broke in only to find she'd eaten his galaxy and drunk his coke. In a sugar and caffeine deprived state he murdered her.

He will claim temporary insanity in his defence in reference to said sugar/caffeine slump.

Tee2072 Fri 12-Jul-13 19:48:01

Made the round up and no resolution?!

Beehatch Fri 12-Jul-13 20:27:27

The mystery deepens. (That Aitch seems suspiciously over-invested)

Beehatch Fri 12-Jul-13 20:28:42

Have you tried looking in the Roundup OP?


gillywillywoo Fri 12-Jul-13 20:34:12


NatashaBee Fri 12-Jul-13 20:44:15

Come back OP!

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Fri 12-Jul-13 20:47:33

Bollocks! Why did this go in the round up when there was no answer?

Nagoo Fri 12-Jul-13 20:57:06

How does she know the door is locked from the inside with the key?
unless the key is in the door?
And then how was the DP going to get back in?
He may have put the things in the kitchen before she locked the door and she didn't see the stuff on the side until she came back in there later.

GoofyIsACow Fri 12-Jul-13 22:01:33

OP you are responsible for my second appearance in the talk round up... It's bittersweet...

GlitterFingers Fri 12-Jul-13 22:22:33

I hope he hasn't really killed her but then again op might have better things to do unlike me

MrsWolowitz Fri 12-Jul-13 22:26:40

Well? Where was he?

Hope you found him OP!

outingmyselfprobably Fri 12-Jul-13 23:20:50


BeaWheesht Fri 12-Jul-13 23:27:05

I really need to know!

KnittyFoxyMa Sat 13-Jul-13 00:09:45

I am actually delurking to beg to find out what happened here!

QOD Sat 13-Jul-13 02:47:34

I reckon he was in the study with the candelabra

Oh come on OP! You and Aitch can't do this to us!

Twunk Sat 13-Jul-13 09:46:55

This is the fifth time I've checked back because I have nothing better to do with my life

toomanyfionas Sat 13-Jul-13 09:49:18


BillyGoatintheBuff Sat 13-Jul-13 09:55:32

Argh! update needed!

TooExtraImmatureCheddar Sat 13-Jul-13 10:04:33

Oh no! Come back, OP! I need to know!

Did you eat the chocolate?

DoJo Sat 13-Jul-13 12:10:10

Oh good grief - I am also going to have to put my life on hold until there is an answer. And refresh......refresh.....(curse loudly and resolve to hunt the OP and her husband down).....refresh.....

Do we think the OP is blissfully unaware that she made talk roundup and of the consternation and frustration she is causing us all?

DuchessFanny Sat 13-Jul-13 16:07:51

Oh FGS ... Why am I so intrigued ? ... WHERE WAS HE ? ... Please ....

OrdinaryGirl Sat 13-Jul-13 18:05:22

Have now had to add this thread to iphone homescreen for ease of checking Mr. Not Updates or I will never sleep again.
Mr. Not clearly hanging out in Atlantis w/ Lord Lucan & Shergar.

Oh so now uou all want to knw

Had a drunk Stealth? grin


Undermines my point somewhat. blushgrin

sittinginthesun Sat 13-Jul-13 22:05:46

Had a drunk, TheOne?

blush again

Um yes, a little one or three

Ha ill have you know I mn perfectly well when drunk but my phone defeats mesmile

I have had a drink as im at a party smile but its te last as I am watching possibly sick children?

Personally I think unless the op has also gone througb the vortex she should be BANNED for this

DoJo Sat 13-Jul-13 23:31:58

Heavens to Betsy - is it possible to get MNHQ to track down the OP and demand satisfaction? Otherwise I'm thinking of organising a whip round for the cost of a private detective (or possibly Jonathan Creek himself) to resolve this one.

absentmindeddooooodles Sat 13-Jul-13 23:40:41

Shamelessly place marking. God god op come back and tell us where he is!!!

Oh Stealth I hope the possibly ill dcs are ok.

If op comes back I hope she is ashamed at leaving us all hanging like this.

ScrambledSmegs Sat 13-Jul-13 23:53:35

It's like the Mystery of Edwin Drood. We'll never know the answer.

seasalt Sun 14-Jul-13 00:06:13

is he sitting in the car?

DoJo Sun 14-Jul-13 00:06:38

I've just been sitting here thinking about how meta this thread has gone. Now I'm wondering if it's like one of those annoying films where the whole 'mystery' of the ending is supposed to be the point. I hate those films.

ZingWidge Sun 14-Jul-13 00:06:39

is Sharon behind this?
are the spiders in the shed all dead?

what kind of chocolate was it?

wherw is everyone? confused

Zing was Galaxy wink

notanyanymore Sun 14-Jul-13 08:27:02

sorry forgot to update, it was all very dull! he's come back, put the stuff on the side (as some kind of appology) and then gone to the pub with the neighbour! no mystery just broken locks... I was quite disappointed by the dullness of it all, no ninja'ing out the windows, no vapourisation, just a normal old bog standard row (complete with him going to my MUM's to moan a bout me!!) But the trip to the pub with the neighbour was new!

QOD Sun 14-Jul-13 08:28:11

Oh sad

I hoped we'd find out he'd done a Luther style slither out from under the bed grin

notanyanymore Sun 14-Jul-13 08:32:17

lol so did I! Rows get so dull, I'd have enjoyed some kind of off the wall grand finale, ho hum back to the same old (I used to quite fancy Jonathon Creek too)

UterusUterusGhali Sun 14-Jul-13 08:41:48


GlitterFingers Sun 14-Jul-13 08:50:16

Tell him he has disappoint the whole of mn with that. I wanted him to be strapped to the ceiling or in a secret room behind a bookcase

QOD Sun 14-Jul-13 08:52:49

I've started a new thread about stupid things done after a row now grin

notanyanymore Sun 14-Jul-13 09:57:17

QOD can you link your thread? I want to seee!

ZingWidge Sun 14-Jul-13 10:14:32

yes QOD please link it.

sorry OP that you are disappointed.
but better this way.

Luther- style slithering from under bed would have been gruesome. grin

QOD Sun 14-Jul-13 10:27:32
PelvicFloorClenchReminder Sun 14-Jul-13 10:41:10

No wormholes? No Sapphire & Steel?


Would be a pretty cool way to dispell post-row bad vibes though, I shall consider something similar myself in future.

MrsJ0nes Mon 15-Jul-13 15:41:04

That was brilliant! Exciting! #ImustGetALife

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now