Sick child-do I leave him and go away for the weekend with the others???

(52 Posts)
TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 21:55:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Numberlock Thu 29-Nov-12 21:57:14

How old is dd2?

Bluestocking Thu 29-Nov-12 21:57:48

I would send DP/H and DD2. Sick children need their mummies.

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 21:58:37

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AnyFuckingDude Thu 29-Nov-12 22:00:03

The worst outcome is that you all stay home and miss the fun. Toddler being ill is not your dd's fault, and it would be sad if she missed out in the face of two very capable parents where it is possible to be in two places at once

Work back from that, and see where it gets you

The Lake District ain't in the Falkland Isles or summat, so you could be home in an hour or so if toddler takes a huge turn for the worse

FergusSingsTheBlues Thu 29-Nov-12 22:00:22

This must be a joke.

AnyFuckingDude Thu 29-Nov-12 22:01:17 you disagree that a child can have two capable parents ?

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:02:20

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helpyourself Thu 29-Nov-12 22:03:33

One parent stay with DS, one goes with DD to CP.

pepperrabbit Thu 29-Nov-12 22:04:07

Send DD2 with DP, hope that you can join them asap depending on how DS is.
Really upsetting you can't all go together, but this wouldn't completely waste all the cash and disappoint DD2.
What a pain after all that planning.

EveryDudeKnows Thu 29-Nov-12 22:04:18

I would let DP go with DD and hopefully be able to join them during the weekend.

fengirl1 Thu 29-Nov-12 22:04:57

Wait and see how he is tomorrow. Center Parcs are able to get medical help for you if you need it - it might be worth getting the number for it when/if you arrive?

LineRunner Thu 29-Nov-12 22:05:52

Is your point, OP, why should it be you who stays (or returns with DS if necessary)? I would agree that it shouldn't just be assumed.

musttidyupBeforeSantaComes Thu 29-Nov-12 22:06:37

Send other with DH and you stay with poorly one. You know that's the answer don't you? smile then book a spa break with some girlfriends for the new year so you have that to look forward to. Poor you. sad

MsElleTow Thu 29-Nov-12 22:07:54

I would say one parent and DD2 go, the other parent stay at home with DS. I wouldn't send DD2 on her own with your friends just incase it is a bug and she catches it. If she starts being sick in the middle of the night she is going to want one of you there.

It's sod's bloody law re the timing! We have had to cancel holidays and breaks away because the kids have been ill! Hope he is better soon!

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:09:11

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MmeLindor Thu 29-Nov-12 22:10:00

I'd wait till tomorrow and see how his is. If he is ill, then send DP with DD - no point in all of you missing out.

Or you go and send DP, if you think that you would still be able to relax and enjoy yourself and he would be ok to stay at home.

Why would anyone assume this woudl be a joke thread?

redwellybluewelly Thu 29-Nov-12 22:10:08

Your DD does not have to miss out. You go with her.

I have done every hospital admission with our DD. Eight in two years, DH on two occasions has not got to the ward until eleven ish in the morning because he was so tired. I'd had no sleep. So. Last week when DD was again blue lighted in on o2 I resolved that when we got home DH could do some over night care. DH told me she needed her mummy, I told him mummy needed her sleep. She was fine with him, and he needs to learn how to look after her.

Go get a break. Leave ds at home with DH. You could be home swiftly if he needed you.

MmeLindor Thu 29-Nov-12 22:11:29

If DP happy to stay then you go.

How far away are you, and how quick can you get home if he does have to go into hospital or is upset and wants you home? (DS, not DP)

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 29-Nov-12 22:13:16

I would send Dp with DD2 and stay with DS. I couldn't have a good time knowing DS was home/hospital but I'm sure your Dp will manage. Hopefully DS will be well enough for you to both go as well, if not initially at least later in the week. Fecking sods law though isn't it sad

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:14:42

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ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 29-Nov-12 22:16:01

Nurses station on the site & hospital 2 miles away?? - if he isn't actually in hospital I'd take him. I'd even take him if I knew it was asthma chucking up, but with the norovirus going around, I wouldn't take the risk.

BellaVita Thu 29-Nov-12 22:16:24

I would see how he is tomorrow, but I see nothing wrong in one of you going with DD2 and the other following with DS if he perks up.

Good to see you!!

nannyof3 Thu 29-Nov-12 22:16:46

Why wud u consider leaving him?
Send ur husband and DD to center parcs and u stay at home with ur son

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 29-Nov-12 22:17:35

TSC - that's why I wouldn't leave DS with your DP. Nothing you have posted in the past has made me think I'd feel confident leaving a sick child with him - sorry. I know you say he's better than he was... but even so.

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:19:21

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MsElleTow Thu 29-Nov-12 22:19:39

TSC (wonderful to see you back by the way) of course it doesn't matter which one stays and which one goes. A SAHM works bloody hard too. If you want to go, and your DP is happy with that, and you think DS will be fine with that, then go and enjoy the time spent with DD2.

Both my DC spent quite a bit of time in hospitals. DH did a lot of the stays, after I'd stopped BF because he could cope better with less sleep than me. I was a SAHM too.

babydude Thu 29-Nov-12 22:19:40

I'd leave DP with DS and go with DD.

You day yourself that you've done all of the hospital stays, you're with him all the time, you're fecking knackered and you need a break.

Also, maybe your 5yo needs some mummy time too.

You DP is perfectly capable of looking after his DS. Go with DD.

ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 29-Nov-12 22:20:08

Nannyof3 - Why would she consider leaving him? Because the child has two parents and the parents have two small children (and one older one who is probably running in the opposite direction to centre parks with the OLDS [grin) - it should not defaut to the father to go and have fun and the mother to stay with the sick toddler - that's why she would & should consider it! FFS - I think I can hear the 1950's calling you!

redwellybluewelly Thu 29-Nov-12 22:21:32

Ha. Yes he did that twice. It's always blue lights for us and last week was the first time we'd got discharged not admitted so he could damn well take his turn. Anothert time he decided not to follow the paramedics and went to bed and another time he rang in sick to work the next day due to tiredness and then poled up after lunch, I'd been awake best part of 40hours and DD was v poorly wanting cuddles and on o2, not feeding etc.

I'm also pg so thought ut a good time for DH to start learning the ropes

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:23:00

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PogoBob Thu 29-Nov-12 22:23:10

IMHO, see how he is in the morning and assess whether he is fit to then. DD shouldn't be expected to miss out because of her brother being ill.

I also think it is perfectly acceptable for your DP to stay with DS (assuming DS will be happy with him) and for you to go. I agree that small children often want their mothers when ill but don't think it should have to automatically be you who makes the sacrifice.

DH is a SAHP whilst I work 5 days a week, sometimes that means that I have to leave DD when she is ill (she doesn't have anything serious but has had a series of bugs recently), she has always been ok with DH.

PogoBob Thu 29-Nov-12 22:26:00

nannyof3 following your statement to it's logical conclusion, should stay home from work everytime DD is ill rather than leave her with her father?

Are father's somehow incapable of looking after an ill child or something, dear god I thought we had moved passed this type of attitute.

notnowbernard Thu 29-Nov-12 22:27:24

Hi TSC smile

I'd have to stay with ds and send Dp with the others

I know I'd not be able to switch off and enjoy

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:29:47

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redwellybluewelly Thu 29-Nov-12 22:41:28

Yes. It's v v v hard and a crap element of parenting, but you have a very valid point when you mention spending some proper
time with your daughter.

I weaned DD about three months ago, she is a similar age to your ds, and hence why there wasn't much I could do with her that DH couldn't

MmeLindor Thu 29-Nov-12 22:45:47

I would never presume that I would be better at staying with a sick child. My DH is just as capable. The an ill child needs his mummy is rather old fashioned now, isn't it?

Hope he perks up by tomorrow. When are you due to leave?

TheSecondComing Thu 29-Nov-12 22:50:23

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ChippingInLovesAutumn Thu 29-Nov-12 23:03:42

Well, if you are happy that DP is now able to look after him properly then if anyone stays home it should be him. You have, by far, done the bulk of the caring so far - must be his turn and it must be DD's turn for some time with Mummy. However, hopefully you can all go! If you do, make sure you get some time to rest and some time to spend with DD while DP looks after DS.

FergusSingsTheBlues Fri 30-Nov-12 05:48:58

Why did it say it must be a joke? Its a no brainer! I do think kids want their mums in particular when they are sick. I know i would have.

Im in the same position myself and am about to forego a weekend of shitty telly and cakesbecause my son is too sick to go to his grandparents, in my view....hes been coughing all night and much as he loves his v capable dad....hed be better staying with me, a pity cos im seven months preggers and have been looking forward to solitude, but lifes like that at times! Good luck.

SavoyCabbage Fri 30-Nov-12 06:09:36

I think you should go and leave your ds with his daddy. You can always go home if you have to.

I left my dd2 at home with my dh when she had just come out of hospital as a baby. Only for the day but it was a 12 hour day, to take my dd on a much anticipated day trip. dd2 was fine. With her own father who loves her.

HoneyDragon Fri 30-Nov-12 06:17:52

Are you sharing a lodge with others?

If you are not I'd take him. The medical facilities at cp are very good. And worst case scenario they can get an ambulance to you just as quick as they can at home.

Then you good share the care, and he has more chance of meeting Santa.

seeker Fri 30-Nov-12 07:02:41

"n coughing all night and much as he loves his v capable dad....hed be better staying with me"

Why on earth? And how does "v capable dad" feel about being told he's not quite as capable as he thought he was?

cheeseandmushroomghostie Fri 30-Nov-12 07:13:42

I would check with the nurses coming, male its not norovirus etc, check you're happy with the medical facilities at or near cp, and go. Change of scenery, relaxing (as much as you can) with friends, fresh air, excitement of Santa will do you all good. Get dp to have kids in the morning so you can lie in or do what you want to do. With an also rubbish DH I sympathise, but sometimes they have to be told they are looking after the dc rather than waiting to be asked, and they usually manage fine. Have a good time and hope ds gets well soon.

Sirzy Fri 30-Nov-12 07:16:43

Hope he has stopped vommiting and can go smile

As you know DS is very similar to your DS and has a good habit of being ill at the most inconvenient time! Last just he was admitted with pneumonia and an asthma attack 4 days before we were due to go away for the weekend. He was released the day before and his consultant told us no problem going away just make sure you have details for local hospitals just incase.

I have kept all of his hopsital letters in his red book so if he ends up in hospital while we are away I have a pretty good history with us If they want to waste time reading them all

TheSecondComing Fri 30-Nov-12 10:33:39

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AnyFuckingDude Fri 30-Nov-12 18:02:19

have a lovely time smile

TheSecondComing Mon 03-Dec-12 15:17:33

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icclebabyjesusheave Mon 03-Dec-12 16:07:29

Oh dear sad

I don't really know what to say as the trauma of having to spend time in Penrith is too much for me to contemplate.

Glad you other half enjoyed his stay and good for you letting him do it!

ChippingInLovesAutumn Mon 03-Dec-12 17:11:44

Oh dear sad

What a shame. Did you leave DD there with friends or did she come home too? What a disappointment for all of you.

I really hope they can find a way of helping you x

Did DD1 have her party grin

Sirzy Mon 03-Dec-12 17:34:03

Oh no. Hope he is better soon,

What medication is he on? Is he under the care of a consultant?

TheSecondComing Mon 03-Dec-12 17:57:11

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