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What would you do with this guilty secret?

(27 Posts)
WorryWarrier Tue 13-May-14 15:43:22

Every day I carry a guilty secret from DH and I can't forgive myself.
To cut a long story short, DH have been together since I was 18 and I am now in my 30's (he is still the only person I have been with), but we had a break 4 years into our relationship because I wanted to experience going on dates with other people (and DH at the time was not the most partner!) There was one particular guy I liked and DH knew of this when I broke up with him. I went on a couple of dates with this other fellow and kissed him. It didn't progress beyond that and DH and I got back together shortly after -eventually married and had kids. But he doesn't know that I have actually kissed this guy.
The mortifying thing is, they have now become close acquaintances and really like each other, and all the other people in our group of friends know about the kiss and DH does not (only that I used to fancy him but he knows I do not in the slightest now).
I know I have been dishonest and a bad person and DH should have the opportunity to know about it and make his own decision; but I also know it would hurt and humiliate DH, break us up, break our friendship group.
Wwyd in this position-would you own up to the guilty secret, or keep it buried?

WorryWarrier Thu 15-May-14 21:41:46

No but clearly I need to!

It just feels so underhand when I turn up to weddings, parties, etc etc with my husband and everyone knows apart from my husband.

I will draw a line under it and move on.

Thanks for giving me a good shake smile

SolomanDaisy Fri 16-May-14 09:07:44

Why don't you just mention it to him? It will become clear that it is a non issue. But then you are likely to find something else to focus your anxiety on, so it might be a good idea to talk to a professional about it.

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