My very first thought was Sunshine by Robin McKinley. It's a book about a girl who meets a vampire, but it's nothing like Twilight.
Anything by Robin McKinley, really, but a lot of her other books are more traditional fantasy than urban fantasy. She is all about the strong females though.
Other recommendations I have are also verging on the non-urban side of the fantasy genre (rural fantasy?!?) Things like Kristin Britain's Green Rider series and Sherwood Smith's Court Duel.
Trying to get back to Urban Fantasy, have you read anything by Holly Black? I've read a couple of her faerie books (Tithe and Valiant) but it was a good few years ago, so I can't really remember them.
Some urban fantasy books I've not really got on with include; the Kitty series by Carrie Vaughn and the Faythe series by Rachel Vincent. They might be good books, I just don't much like the werewolf/werecreature trope with the oppressed females fighting their way to the top of the pride/pack/whatever.
More along the young adult vein, I would recommend Maggie Stiefvater's werewolf series, and her new Raven Boys series (2 out of 4 have been released), and also the very chilling Gone series by Michael Grant.
Good recommendations above. Some ideas for me too. Also try seanan McGuire, Kat Richardson, Chloe Neil, Juliet marillier (not really urban fantastic more ancient magic)', Emily gee, my list could go on and on. Shot in the dark is Andre norton. Hmm if you can still buy them! Loads more, post again if you want me to add