Fat, unhappy and depressed...

[chrissie79]

Hello

I need some advice please. I'm so unhappy, I need to lose at least three stone and I keep failing on every diet I try. I thought i'd give this website a go to see if I can get some help. I gained weight after the birth of my son and since then i've tried WW and SW.

Is anyone doing a diet that actually works and stays off?

Chrissie

[Furball]

you need to join This lot they are in the same boat

[fedda]

Furball, I feel for you. I'm one of the people on a recommended thread but unfortunately no one knows what works as every diet can work short term but to keep yourself on strict rules long term is very hard if not impossible. I think the general rule is to eat less and excersise more but it doesn't work for everyone as simetimes we don't feel well and can't excersise and also eat less is not a specific thing - eat less then what? May be you could reduce some things which you think make you put on weight and try to increase your time for excersising. I'm not an expert though but they all have different ideas anyway. Soups which you cook yourself without adding cream or butter and without bread are very good. Vegetable based are the best. Good luck and you are very welcome to join us.

[PinguKiller]

Chrissie, is your son walking yet?

[Furball]

fedda - why do you feel for me? Iwas just pointing chrissie to another thread!

[fedda]

Oh, I'm sorry, I should have written Chrissie. How stupid of me.

[chrissie79]

Hi all

Thanks for the replies, it's nice to know other people are in the same situation. My son is walking and we often go out and about but this doesn't help me lose weight. I joined a gym about five months ago but gave up after having to get on the machines next to so many 'body beautifuls', cows!!

The soup idea sounds good and it's the right time of year, i'll give it a go

Chrissie

[fedda]

Hi, Chrissie. i've tried to have soup for lunch and tea yesterday and i had fruit and veg salad for breakfast, soup made from raw beetroot, cabbage and carrot with herbs and spices for lunch followed by buternut squash with it's seeds and buckweat, snacks with apples and nuts (unsalted) and in 1 day i've lost almost 1 kg. i wasn't hungry and i wasn't sepriving myself, I even had 1 mug of coffee with 2 sugars in the evning. I think someone suggested fat burner diet when you have soup for lunch and tea and you can have a yougurt, mostly fruit for breakfast and some simple meal. it will take some time but you'll achieve it. i'm trying to dance every day to my disco music. Walking is a good excersise but you probably need to keep moving every time you can. I now don't stand still in the shops at the checkout but keep slightly mooving woithout irritatng the others, i also try to tuck my tummy in every so often as my tummy is huge and i mean huge (i only had it like that when I was 7 or 8 month pregnant!)Best of luck!

[Elasticwoman]

My advice for maintaining a healthy weight is

• eat protein and high fibre foods for every meal - it will fill you up.

• remove yourself from temptation in between meals, but if you do feel peckish bring the next meal forward - even if it means lunch at 11 am.

• Walk everywhere and severely limit your time on computer or watching tv.

• Apart from walking, take up some physical activity that you find fun, preferably in the fresh air. This will probably involve your needing childcare unless it's sex and then you won't need the fresh air. I think that driving to the gym and then pumping iron is the most depressing waste of time.

[fedda]

Elasticwoman, are you against even healthy snacks like cucumber pieces or tomatoes, carrots sticks, apples, peaches, berries?

[Elasticwoman]

No I'm not against those sort of snacks - depends how hungry you are. If you're really hungry, which you might be at 11 if you had a small breakfast at 7, then I think lunch is called for.

The trouble is, we put on weight because we eat when we are not hungry. Then we try to starve ourselves in order to lose weight and end up eating too many empty calories.

I think it helps to look at your lifestyle and see how you could change it to eat better and be more active. Exercise is really important not only to control weight but for general well-being.

[fedda]

Hi, Elasticwoman. I think it's very popular to think that we need to eat when we're hungry and not to eat when we aren't. It makes perfect sence in theory but in reality if I'm a teacher and i need to teach for say 2 hours I can't stop and leave my pupils in the class and go and eat because I'm hungry at that time. the same goes for so many other jobs when it will be unecceptable to leave a working place and start eating your food instead of working. Say, I'm a secreatary and my boss needs to dictate something to me and i say that i'll do it in half an hour because I'm hungry now and it's not a lunch break. I can't imagine my boss will be happy and that can lead to my problems at work. my husband comes from work, he is hungry, I haven't seen him for a whole day, kids want to eat and I just serve it to them saying that I'm not hungry. It's not a nice sharing experience, is it? Everybody has finished and it's time to wash up but wait, I'm hungry now. i start preparing my plate for dinner annoying everyone and not spending the time with them as they don't funcy seeing me eating when they have just finished. You get the picture. people go to theatre, concerts, they travel, there are so many situations in everyday life when we have to eat because this is the time and next time. All we can do is eat less if we are not hungry but we can't, at least i can't eat only when I'm hungry and never eat if I'm not. May be if I was single, but even so, there is the work concideration anyway.

[43Today]

Hi Chrissie, I agree with Elasticwoman. The best things you can do are increase your activity level and cut down on food. It's not necessary to go on a strict (and usually very depressing) diet.

It's a good idea to make small changes on a week-by-week basis, rather than trying to drastically change your lifestyle all in one go.

To benefit from exercise, you need to make sure that you get out of breath and feel warmer - this is important for burning calories. Doing gentle stretching, pilates etc won't burn enough calories to make a difference, though obviously would benefit you in other ways (improving flexibility or strengthening core muscles). You don't need to exercise for hours on end, you can do it in short bursts - for example, if you did 2 15-mins brisk walks a day, that would add up to 2.5 hours of exercise a week.

As far as the eating goes, in my experience strict low-calorie diets are hard to stick to and lower your basic metabolic rate, which means your body burns less calories than before. It would be better to replace regular snacks of things like biscuits with fruit or low-fat yogurt. Another easy way to consume fewer calories is to use a tea-plate rather than a dinner plate to serve your food on. Any bowls of food, use a smaller bowl than what you currently use. Automatically your serving size is reduced. And don't have seconds!

Another easy way to fit in a bit of exercise is to use a DVD - or even just play some loud music and really dance your heart out for 15 mins!

Researchers have found that slow and steady weight loss is more likely to stay off than crash dieting. It's probably better not to keep weighing yourself; weight can fluctuate enormously and you can get really discouraged by seemingly inexplicable variations. It's usually more encouraging to go by how your clothes fit. Anyway, good luck and hope it goes well.

[spokette]

Make gallons of lentil soup. The fibre will keep you full until your next meal. Try and base your dinner on 1/3 protein, 1/3 carb and 1/3 veg. Eat smaller portions and chew each mouthful between 15-20 times. It takes about 20 minutes for your brain to register than you are full so you need to eat more slowly. Drink lots of water throughout the day and if you feel peckish, eat water/fibre laden fruit like plums, oranges or even apple.

Move around more too and when you can face it, do more exercise. You will feel better once you have completed a session. If you are self-conscious, try a fitness DVD. Davina McCall's are good to start with and I love Taebo.

Good luck!