Is it normal for a groom to have a special dance with his mother?

(108 Posts)

I'm just wondering if this is something my MIL to be has come up with or if it's normal for a son and his mum to have a special dance that's just for the two of them at a wedding.

It sounds like a shit idea to me but perhaps I'm biased!

alwayslateforwork Sat 27-Apr-13 21:38:39

Er, no. Not where I'm from. Weird.

Erm no hmm

EverybodysStressyEyed Sat 27-Apr-13 21:40:34

i've only ever seen the b&g do a dance and then split up and the bride dance with her dad and the groom with his mum and then everyone piles in

Hulababy Sat 27-Apr-13 21:40:39

Never heard of it before and I have been to lots of weddings.

Normal for him to dance with his mum for a dance during the night but not a special set up one with only them on the dance floor.

Springforward Sat 27-Apr-13 21:40:57

No, it's not normal, I have never seen that at a wedding and frankly would feel sorry for the bride if I did.

Floralnomad Sat 27-Apr-13 21:41:11

Very strange .

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 27-Apr-13 21:42:23

It's odd, but surely no more odd than a bride dancing with her father?

I've seen it done once.

It was the second dance, after the bride and groom dance. And it was this song

has totally outed self

purrpurr Sat 27-Apr-13 21:43:25

Urgh. Weird. I think I just made my first cats bum face. Mums that are all over their adult sons like sauce on spaghetti makes me hurl. Not that I'm speaking from increasingly bitter experience, obviously...

Well I had a dance with my dad, and DH had one with his mum, but not a 'special' dance with specially chosen music or anything, and not just him and his mum on the dance floor.

Thanks for the responses.

Would it be really unreasonable of me to not tell the DJ which song she wants?

I just think it'll be really cringey.

doublecakeplease Sat 27-Apr-13 21:46:40

I've seen it at one wedding. Not arsed either way - its his wedding too so if that's what he wants too then fair play

twooter Sat 27-Apr-13 21:50:06

What song is it? And what does your dh think about it?

He doesn't want it! But we were both just wondering if it's the norm.

My dad isn't invited to our wedding so I won't be dancing with him.

If it's a regular done thing then we will do it, but I can't help feeling that it's a bit odd and cringey.

The song is Louis Armstrong - Wonderful world. She wanted Celine Dion but DP put his foot down about that.

piprabbit Sat 27-Apr-13 21:56:10

Are you having a special dance with your dad? Could you extend it so that DH dances with him mum while you dance with your dad?

But if your DH doesn't want it and you don't want it, then I think you are going to have to tell her.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 27-Apr-13 21:56:12

If he doesn't want to, then he needs to tell his mum that!
And if he needs an excuse, can he not say it'll make you sad (re your dad)?

DontmindifIdo Sat 27-Apr-13 21:58:45

No, not the norm!!!

Bride and groom do 'first dance' either for the full dance, or until about halfway through when the father of the groom should ask the mother of the bride to dance and the father of the bride ask the mother of the groom dance, the best man asks the chief bridesmaid to dance.

In some cultures the bride has a dance with her father, but never the groom and his mum.

Make a big thing about the fact your dad will be asking her to dance as that's the proper tradition.

Be sure to tell the DJ no matter how many times she asks him to play it, he's not too.

DontmindifIdo Sat 27-Apr-13 22:00:03

oh, missed your dad won't be there, is there anyone who would be able to step in to make a big thing of asking her to dance? Could it be that you've said the best man is to ask her to dance and join your first dance half way through?

SconeRhymesWithGone Sat 27-Apr-13 22:00:14

At our wedding, DH and his mother joined me and my father on the dance floor after Dad and I had danced a short time just the two of us. This was in the US, though, where something along these lines is fairly common.

cat Sat 27-Apr-13 22:04:13

Er, no.

And again, no.

The apron strings are supposed to be cut before the wedding.

Xiaoxiong Sat 27-Apr-13 22:06:32

At many weddings I've been to, the bride and groom start off the first dance on their own and then the father of the bride and the mother of the groom then cut in and dance with their respective children for a bit. Not a big special choreographed number or announced by the DJ like the first dance is though.

piprabbit Sat 27-Apr-13 22:07:24

Sorry x-post, I've just seen your dad won't be there. In which case definitely tell her that nobody will be formally dancing with their parents.

purrpurr Sat 27-Apr-13 22:07:51

She wants a special song? I'm appalled. Do you think she wants her moment in the limelight, and this is a sure fire way of getting attention? Or is she creepily attached to her son? In a way that suggests perhaps she wishes she was the one marrying him?

ChasedByBees Sat 27-Apr-13 22:11:07

I think this might be ok if your dad was there but as he isn't, it would be insensitive and I think that's a good excuse for your DP to pass on to let his mother down gently. What would you do during this dance? Watch twiddling your thumbs?

Right, so how is the best way to approach this.

My preferred option: don't tell the DJ to play her song. Have a great time dancing and enjoying the music we have chosen so she forgets about her dance.

Option 2: DP tells her straight that he doesn't want to do the dance.

DP is great, he's not someone who sides with his mother over me. He's had to tell her a few times that I come first in his life. His mother is very overbearing, but I think she means well. I don't want to be nasty, I'm sure it's hard to have a son, be the most important woman in his life and then another woman comes along and takes that from you, so I do try hard to make allowances for some of her behaviour. But at the same time she drives me fucking mad.

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 22:14:26

No, no no. Cringey.

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 22:15:15

DP needs to tell her, she won't forget <bitter>

purrpurr Sat 27-Apr-13 22:15:23

Option 1 won't work. If she's that keen on getting a special dance that she's chosen a song, she won't forget about it.

CatelynStark Sat 27-Apr-13 22:17:56

I think your guests' eyebrows will shoot up to the ceiling if this goes ahead. It's very, very unusual and will make people think your MIL is a loon and feel sorry for you

It's your day and all attention should be on you, not her - the crazy baggage!

ivykaty44 Sat 27-Apr-13 22:18:52

Oh dear...

Still18atheart Sat 27-Apr-13 22:19:00

It's not the norm

YANBU especially if you aren't having a Father and Daughter dance

sweetestcup Sat 27-Apr-13 22:22:00

Personally I don't see the difference between this and a bride dancing with her Dad, which I don't think would raise half as many negative comments as this has.

My dad isn't invited sweetestcup

Cocolepew and purrpurr have you got MILs like this? Any stories to share? I could do with some moral support.

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 22:25:26

I find the father/daughter dances cringey too..

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 22:27:58

My MIL is a nightmare. We got married in a small registry office and she howled thewhole way through it. It saud that she would have preferred to be at DHs funeral hmm. I took her to get a fucking grip.
Then she went AWOL, she said she was going home for her glasses. We took the photos without her grin.

NotDavidTennant Sat 27-Apr-13 22:29:01

A fair compromise would be to agree that the DJ would play "It's a Wonderful World" at a certain point in the evening and for your MIL to have 'dibs' on your DP for that dance, but that the dance is not exclusively for them alone and anyone else can get up and dance if they feel like it.

I can't see why she would have a problem with that, unless she's deliberately trying to be the centre of attention.

SirChenjin Sat 27-Apr-13 22:29:29

Oh dear god no - my toes are curling at the thought!

K8Middleton Sat 27-Apr-13 22:31:09

Yeah totally normal. If your dp's name is Oedipus!

I can't see why she would have a problem with that, unless she's deliberately trying to be the centre of attention

She has told her husband he has to buy a new car for the day as she doesn't want me and my mum turning up in a nicer car than her (a hired wedding car)
That struck me as a bit attention seeking.

bigTillyMint Sat 27-Apr-13 22:36:29

Never known it to happen. DH certainly didn't dance with his mum at our wedding.

Not sure I'd have a problem with DH dancing with his mum, but having a "special dance" would be very odd.

She sounds bonkers - good luck with her as a MILgrin

Crawling Sun 28-Apr-13 06:49:04

I wanted a special dance with my dad but he wont be attending owing to have started using again It was going to be changes by kelly amd ozzy osborn.

FruOla Sun 28-Apr-13 07:39:41

I agree with others, as your dad won't be there it isn't appropriate for your DH to have a 'special dance' with his mum.

And as for buying a new car shock. If she's that bothered, your ILs could hire a luxury car for the weekend - or hire a chauffeur driven car for the day.

A friend of mine told me that at her first wedding (I didn't know her then) her new DH and his mother walked out of the registry office arm in arm together whilst she, the new wife, trailed along behind ... alone hmm

purrpurr Sun 28-Apr-13 08:31:07

AKissIsNotAContract your MIL-to-be is starting to sound, to me, like she wishes she was going to be the bride-to-be. Is she going to rock up to your wedding in a flowing ivory gown?

As for stories, mine is relatively harmless compared to yours, it's all low level niggles, like...

When we all eat together as a family, she sets the table so I'm down the bottom with the kids (not mine - I don't have any yet), and everyone else is sat in pairs of couples. She sits next to my DH. All other wives sit next to their husbands. She sits there visibly preening throughout the entire meal. It's all so... Benign and yet creepy.

I think yours might be a tad more troublesome. What sayeth your DH-to-be - will he speak to her?

SorryMyLollipop Sun 28-Apr-13 08:33:16

Not normal. At all. Now is the time to draw some boundaries. You don't want it, your DP doesn't want it. He needs to tell her it's not happening. She sounds a nightmare. She will only get worse.

At my wedding I only wanted grown up bridesmaids. Because I didn't have her three granddaughters as bridesmaids, and she was pissed off. she dressed them up as bridesmaids in matching dresses so everyone would think they were.

I ditched my STBXH last year and one of the best things about that is that I NEVER have to see his nightmare bloody mother ever again.

SoupDragon Sun 28-Apr-13 08:38:12

If you wanted to avoid unpleasantness on the day you could have it after your first dance, he dances with both his mother and yours, you dance with his father, best man, matron of honour... all the principal wedding party dancing.

Shinigami Sun 28-Apr-13 08:59:04

This reminds me of my MILs wedding. She kept inventing special dances for her and different family members with just them on the dancefloor. The list included:

MIL and her DH (normal)
MIL and her mum
MIL and my DH
MIL and BIL
MIL and her brothers (seperately with different songs)
MIL and SIL

She even picked out songs for each of the "special" dances. Luckily the extra dances didn't happen because her friend told her on the day it was a crap idea.

CheerfulYank Sun 28-Apr-13 09:17:17

Actually in my part of America it is normal! And that's even the song we had grin

DH and I danced the first song together, then I danced with my dad and he danced with his mom to Wonderful World. I think the wedding party joined in partway through, actually.

But most weddings I've been to have a father/daughter dance and a mother/son dance. DH and I combined them as neither of us are big dancers.

purrpurr the seating plan doesn't sound minor, that's really odd of your mil.

And the comment about rather being at his funeral is shocking cocolepew

I think DP will have to have words (again!)

doublecakeplease Sun 28-Apr-13 10:07:34

Is it really that big a deal? It's just a dance for goodness sake. She'll enjoy it, other people will probably humour her, then the night goes on. Just one song. Otherwise there'll be hostility on the day, you'll be watching to make sure shedoesnt approach the dj... Pick your battles i say (and I'm usually an arsey cow)

FruOla Sun 28-Apr-13 10:50:33

Cheerful the scenario you've described doesn't sound unusual at all.

But the OP's MILTB is proposing a special dance for just her and her son, while the OP sits on the sidelines twiddling her thumbs because her father won't be at the wedding.

doublecakeplease Sun 28-Apr-13 10:59:16

Twiddling her thumbs, really?? She could watch, talk to her guests, nip to the loo ... Its 3 minutes!!

seeker Sun 28-Apr-13 10:59:32

I was just about to ask if she's American- I've been to weddings in the States where this happens.

Is it a traditional wedding? If so, who's standing in for your father? Why not let his mom have her dance with her son while you dance with whoever that is?

Could DP try this?

Mum, its occurred to me that if you and I do a solo dance at the wedding, everyone will think you're one of those weird clingy can't-let-go Mums who are secretly jealous of all the attention that the bride is getting, and we know that's totally not true, so we won't do that dance, we don't want people to get the wrong idea do we?

FruOla Sun 28-Apr-13 11:32:32

double, I was repeating an expression used by someone upthread!
I wasn't really suggesting that she wouldn't find anything to do for a few minutes grin

TobyLerone Sun 28-Apr-13 11:38:05

Is it any weirder than the father-daughter (bride) dance which is becoming increasingly popular? Both equally vomity, IMO.

At our wedding, DH's mum came over to dance with him a little way into the song after our first dance. I handed him over and danced with 13yo DS smile

Theironfistofarkus Sun 28-Apr-13 11:46:27

Can you put her off by saying that it is not the norm and other people will think it odd but that your DH wants to honour her at the wedding and intends to say a few words about her in the speech?

drjohnsonscat Sun 28-Apr-13 11:50:55

why is it ok for the bride to dance with father but not groom to dance with mum? It is because men are not allowed to show affection to their mothers?

I can see that it seems weird because it's unusual but isn't that just because we are not good at allowing men to have emotional closeness with people? The father's dance with daughter is part of some strange "passing a woman from one man to another" ritual so although it has come to be just a statement of love, doesn't exactly have a neutral heritage either.

ReluctantlyBeingYoniMassaged Sun 28-Apr-13 11:52:51

It's weird and cringeworthy.

seeker Sun 28-Apr-13 11:54:19

No. It's because a woman has to completely detach herself from her son when he marries. She is not allowed to be interested in him, love him or want to have any contact with him at all. She must hand him over, body and soul to his wife, and go home and wait to be summoned if required. Which she won't be, because she will, by her lack of contact, have shown that she hates her new Dil. The ultimate Catch 22.

Gay40 Sun 28-Apr-13 12:03:29

I find it creepy, but then I find a lot of things about tradition creepy. I don't like the father/daughter dance either.
Just No.

doublecakeplease Sun 28-Apr-13 12:04:29

Couldn't agree more seeker - lots of typical answers here. Is 1 song going to spoil the wedding? Why can't the mil be indulged for a few minutes? (disclaimer - mine is lovely and if she wanted to come and dance with DH in my front room then i'd turn up the music. I'll be a mil some day and whilst i wouldn't like the limelight of a special song i would love to dance with my son on his wedding day without anyone thinking the apron strings need severing

Trill Sun 28-Apr-13 12:09:24

I don't see why it is any more shit than the bride having a special dance with her father.

At least there's no "here, take ownership of my virgin daughter" implications.

(HT to LRD for the "here have my virgin daughter", which I now use in so many wedding threads!)

FannyMcNally Sun 28-Apr-13 12:10:48

A father giving his adult independent daughter away to another man, now THAT's weird, cringeworthy, not normal etc but seems to happen in church weddings up and down the country. A special dance between mother and groom is no different from all the other peculiar things that happen on wedding days IMO.

If the groom is happy with it then I don't see the problem, as he isn't happy with it I would just tell her you aren't doing the whole parent/child dance thing, it yours and your dps wedding, she shouldn't be requesting anything.

Normal? No!
Creepy? Yes!

SantanaLopez Sun 28-Apr-13 12:15:09

God, I wouldn't have minded this one bit. I think it's quite nice.

I can't see the problem tbh, just let it happen and enjoy your day, why cause youself unnecessary stress.

BalloonSlayer Sun 28-Apr-13 12:21:19

I do think it sounds a bit creepy but then when I read My preferred option: don't tell the DJ to play her song. Have a great time dancing and enjoying the music we have chosen so she forgets about her dance. and Option 2: DP tells her straight that he doesn't want to do the dance. I felt a bit tearful.

And when you said she wanted "What a wonderful world" I got even more tearful.

I don't think I'd want to dance with either of my DSes on their wedding day, but if I did I'd be gutted if they wouldn't dance with the Old Girl just to humour me.

(as your Dad isn't coming she perhaps feels odd that your Mum is getting a bigger role to play than Mums usually do at weddings, and wants to up her visibility too)

Graceparkhill Sun 28-Apr-13 12:23:05

I genuinely don't see why this is a problem. One dance out of an entire wedding. If it would give your future MIL some pleasure then why not?

Growlithe Sun 28-Apr-13 12:27:49

Couldn't you just have the DJ play the song and maybe mention it's for MIL, without mentioning it's MIL and Groom's big dance? Then he could dance with her without a massive deal being made of it, and everyone would be happy.

Branleuse Sun 28-Apr-13 12:29:25

Ive seen it in french weddings I think, but then they always seem to have massive OTT weddings.

Branleuse Sun 28-Apr-13 12:30:41

if my mil wanted to have a dance with dp then i would be happy for them.

She'd be lucky though. Ive never seen him get up and dance for anyone

iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Sun 28-Apr-13 12:35:25

I don't see this as a problem at all although I wouldn't want to do it if I was the 'Mother'.

Sidge Sun 28-Apr-13 12:39:21

Well I guess it depends on the nature of the relationship between a man and his mum and how his mum views his wife-to-be.

If she wants a dance because she loves her son, likes to dance and wants a special moment with him on his wedding day then I don't see the problem.

If she wants to upstage her new DIL and demonstrate possessiveness then that's a different kettle of fish.

HOWEVER I think it's really sad that people think it's creepy. What's creepy about loving your son?

It seems like one womans way of stealing the limelight on another womans special day and making her ds uncomfortable in the process.

Just like turning up wearing a white dress/flamenco outfit/gymnast outfit you get the point would detract attention.

I donzt think daddy/daughter dances are right either tho.

FannyMcNally Sun 28-Apr-13 13:04:27

One dance? Stealing the limelight? confused

piratedinosaursgogogo Sun 28-Apr-13 13:16:39

This thread makes me think of an evening wedding reception we went to. By the time the evening guests arrived, the bride had changed into her 'dancing wedding dress'. The bride clearly had dreams of being a dancer and led her new husband through a choreographed first dance, which we all politely clapped to even though the groom looked extremely uncomfortable.

After that, new husband was banished to the sidelines and bride and her father stood in the middle of the dance floor. The anticipation was overwhelming.

The bride and father then performed a 'special routine' to "Daddy Cool". Not just a quick 30 seconds as a bit of fun, or where everyone else could join in, but the whole song. The icing on the cake was the bride's mother, who stood at the opposite end of the dancefloor, doing 'the moves' so that the father of the bride would remember what to do.

It was awful but also strangely wonderful.

Bride and groom are now divorced.

nkf Sun 28-Apr-13 13:22:44

I think everything to do with formal weddings is weird. This idea is weird but it's really for your fiance (weird word) to sort it out.

SorryMyLollipop Sun 28-Apr-13 13:22:58

What's creepy is that this MIL is clearly struggling with not being the centre of attention. She wants to dance with her DS - fine! She wants a special exclusive dance, just the two of them on the dance floor - weird! Fair enough if the whole wedding party was dancing at the same time, swapping around etc but this is just the two of them.

This MIL has asked her DH to buy a new car so they don't get upstaged by the bridal car! As if anyone takes any notice of what car people arrive in anyway!! This is not just about a dance, this is about power and control.

nothruroad Sun 28-Apr-13 13:31:42

I was at a wedding recently where the couple cut the cake and then the new MIL came rushing up with a awful amateurish looked like it was made by a child cake that she had made for the groom to cut. She announced to everyone that it was becasue it was unfair that the whole of the rest of the day was about the bride! nobody knew how to react, was awful!

nkf Sun 28-Apr-13 13:36:00

What can be going through these women's minds?

seeker Sun 28-Apr-13 13:59:19

"What can be going through these women's minds?"

I don't know. I wonder if it's insecurity? Maybe they think that if their husbands give any love or consideration to their mothers,that's love and consideration not being given to them, and they want all of it?

nkf Sun 28-Apr-13 14:00:33

I meant the minds of the mothers.

SantanaLopez Sun 28-Apr-13 14:06:42

Maybe- I love my son. I'm really glad he's getting married. I'd like to dance with him at his wedding. I like this song. Maybe we could dance to it together.

It's mind-blowing, I know.

Roseformeplease Sun 28-Apr-13 14:10:52

My husband danced with his Mum at our wedding (Ceilidh) but he also danced with loads of other people and it was not a "solo." She was just someone he made a point of dancing with once. She taught him to dance, properly, (he is amazing!) so I thought nothing of it.

Miggsie Sun 28-Apr-13 14:27:45

Taken along with her other behaviours this request for a dance is certainly to do with trying to still be the centre of attention or detract attention from you.
Your DH doesn't want to do it so he can just say no.

I also suspect that you will be in for a lifetime of her trying to ease you out of every social occasion. I would also suspect when you have children she will refer to them as hers.

Trying to upstage a bride on a wedding day is a sign of a deeply insecure and possibly spiteful nature. She does think she is in competition with you - who buys a new car so they will look good compared to a wedding hired car? Someone seriously warped, that's who.

SantanaLopez Sun 28-Apr-13 14:35:54

Only someone seriously warped could come up with that particular prophecy, Miggsie hmm

AnneElliott Sun 28-Apr-13 19:20:50

I agree it's a bit weird. Sounds like something my DM would do as she hates someone else being the centre of attention.

At my wedding my DM wanted to walk down the aisle with me and my dad and when he vetoed that she wanted to walk down the aisle in front of me with my DB. I vetoed that.

I would suggest your DP telling her that he'll dance with her to that sing but not on their own.

drjohnsonscat Mon 29-Apr-13 10:06:59

seeker, loving your work on this thread.

Funny how women are wonderful and never wrong and mothers are wonderful and never wrong until they are mothers of grown up sons and then they are dreadful and creepy.

jellybeans Mon 29-Apr-13 10:15:40

We didn't do any sort of family dancing. It's just not for us.

Floralnomad Mon 29-Apr-13 12:57:17

drjohnson ,there speaks a person who doesn't have a crazy mother or MIL.

drjohnsonscat Mon 29-Apr-13 14:24:32

No I don't, No MIL and my mum is great smile.

But I will be a MIL one day, I hope. And I will be just as I am now. There's no father in our family to do the first dance with DD should she want it but I would be honoured if I could walk her down the aisle, make a speech about her, even dance with her if she wants to recreate that tradition in our own odd way, generally show my love for her at her wedding. Ditto my son.

I think mumsnet of all places should be able to celebrate and honour mothers and sons. OK this particular woman might be weird and only the OP knows that but I don't get why the whole idea is weird. Or any more weird than the whole wedding ceremony construct of "virgin" brides being given by the old owner to a new owner and identified as his with a new name and a ring demonstrating ownership.

seeker Mon 29-Apr-13 16:21:42

It's also interesting that one woman's lovely mother is somebody else's MIL from hell.........

Floralnomad Mon 29-Apr-13 16:31:58

Having not spoken to me for 15 years I think even my husband would admit that his mother ,who he loves very much ,is a pretty crap MIL ! My mum on the other hand is a great MIL .

Hullygully Mon 29-Apr-13 16:41:41

While obviously there is nothing wrong with mothers loving sons and hopefully reciprocity too, what IS odd the demand for a "special" dance when there wouldn't normally be one. Taken with the car thing, it is odd.

Wouldn't she just assume that at some point in the evening son would wander over and say, "come on you old bag (whatever), let's have a dance" and they'd just have one without any fuss?

My ds (16) learns ballroom dancing and tried to arrange lessons for me and him together for mother's day as he knows I want to do it too. At his wedding we will basically be giving a whole spangled show.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

K8Middleton Mon 29-Apr-13 18:24:51
Hullygully Mon 29-Apr-13 19:34:21

HOW DID YOU KNOW Katie?

cornyderpy Mon 29-Apr-13 19:40:37

I went to a wedding once where the bride's father actually walked down the aisle with his daughter whilst the organist played them their own special song.

I couldn't believe it when he actually stood up during the speeches and made a speech - how attention seeking. He'd clearly rehearsed it - he kept looking at cue cards.

The icing on the cake was when he danced with his daughter.
So creepy and attention seeking.

EverybodysStressyEyed Mon 29-Apr-13 20:01:35

Good point corny - when I have been to weddings where a mother does a speech I have heard comments about her being attention seeking or a show off (except for the one where the father had died)

Tbh, every one I know who thinks their mil is difficult is also extremely difficult themselves!!

The thing is corny none of that will be happening at my wedding as my dad isn't going.

everybodysstressy you could be onto something there. I'm sure she's disappointed by me as her daughter-in-law. I don't do her son's washing, I won't be taking his surname, I expect him to pull his weight with housework. And my latest crime is that I'm planning to breast feed. Bearing in mind I'm not even pregnant I had to sit through a lecture the other day about how breast feeding is selfish and unfair on her son. DP pulled this face hmm when I told him.

TobyLerone Mon 29-Apr-13 21:32:19

None of that happened at my wedding either. DH still danced with his mum.

I fully expect them to dance with each other, just not to have a special dance just for them with very different music from what we are having played for the rest of the night.

Theironfistofarkus Mon 29-Apr-13 22:30:38

I'm sorry but while it is lovely for a son to dance with his Mum, it is plain weird for the music to change especially and for everyone to stop and watch the dance. I can see why she may want a few private words with her son. But a full on dance of her own with everyone watching is narcissism. This is her son and his wife's day, not hers.

nkf Tue 30-Apr-13 18:36:56

The bride and groom dance is weird too. They sort of sway there while people stand around watching. Bizarre.

Theironfistofarkus Tue 30-Apr-13 20:47:23

I agree nfk. I skipped it at my wedding. Might not have if I wasn't a crap dancer tho!

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