Small guestlist without causing offence

(2 Posts)
ParsleyCake Fri 06-May-16 20:05:28

We have plans to marry at Stonehenge which means a very small guestlist as you can only have 30 people there, including ourselves, our son, celebrant and photographer.

Truly, I only want a very small wedding as we are on a tight budget and would much rather have a tiny but nice wedding rather than a big cheap one. The thing is, how do I cut down the guestlist without causing offence?

We are definitely inviting my mum, both his parents, and one grandparent each (they are the only ones alive still), 6 close friends, and 7 siblings.

I have an aunt and her husband who I need to invite as well as their daughter who will be our flower girl.

We are at 26 people now.

I also want to invite my final remaining family member (I have a small family) , my uncle, because although we are not particularly close I simply cannot invite the entirety of my side of the family and not him, especially as his wife has just passed away - and he is not blood related so he might feel like we don't care about him now that his wife isn't tying him to the family or something.

We absolutely cannot invite any of DH's 4 sets of aunts and uncles as they come with far too many cousins and partners. HOWEVER...surely not inviting them would be incredibly rude?

And if so, what do we say to smooth things over? We will be having a gathering at our house a dew days after the wedding to include them all, but will we still be in their bad books? They aren't unreasonable people, but I know weddings can cause problems.

BackforGood Sat 07-May-16 00:29:03

All other things being equal, it would seem sensible to just go with parents, grandparents and siblings from your families, and not invite the Aunt, husband and your cousin, or your Uncle.
Either you invite all Aunts and Uncles, or none, surely unless there is some important information you haven't put in your op you can't really "rank" some aunts and uncles over others.

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