My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Chat to other Mumsnetters on our Wedding forum.

Weddings

Bride and Groom wanting different venues?

9 replies

Trinity90 · 18/03/2015 11:10

I have my heart set on marrying abroad, my partner is saying he refuses to do that and wants England.

reasons I'd like to get married abroad are

Beautiful location and warm weather ( I'm thinking Italy) so not too far flight wise either

I hate being centre of attention and only want a small wedding

Now this will sound petty/mean, as I know technically it's possible to have a small wedding in England, but for me with a large family, it's not!
I Dont want all my family there, they're drug addicts/ annoying and aggressive on drink / known to steal
And that's not just 1 - 5 odd family member member, it's alot!
If we have it in England,I cant not invite them as it would create family drama

However, if I invited them and it was abroad,I know they wouldn't be able to afford to come. but the ones I want there will be able to afford it, so it makes perfect sense to me?
I don't plan to ask for any sort of gift as I appreciate travelling abroad isn't cheap

Reasons my partner wants to have it in England

He wants a HUGE wedding,lots of guests ( no thanks) he also wants to be sure his best mate can afford it. ( we can pay for him I said)
Oh and he wants to ask for money towards honeymoon

I also think it's cheaper to get married abroad now!

So if any of you lovely brides out there have had a similar predicament predicament, how did you resolve it?

I did suggest us going to Vegas to elope lol but he wants family and friends there :)

OP posts:
eddielizzard · 18/03/2015 11:14

and... welcome to married life Smile

fuzzywuzzy · 18/03/2015 11:16

He wants to ask for money towards the honeymoon.... what if you end up with fifty toasters instead?

You can only discuss it with him. You both need to be on the same page.

Fugacity · 18/03/2015 11:19

Sit down together and make a list of pros and cons of each.

Trinity90 · 18/03/2015 11:19

I have discussed it with him and we can't seem to get on the same page, that's why I'm asking if anyone has had similar experiences and how they resolved it :) I've told him the exact reasons why I want to get married abroad and asked him why he didn't, that's why I could state the reasons above...

OP posts:
Trinity90 · 18/03/2015 11:21

Thanks fug, I'd love to do that and think it's a great idea but my partner I know won't concentrate properly if we're doing it together, maybe I could ask him.to write down all his pros and cons and I write mine down then compare??

OP posts:
TheCowThatLaughs · 18/03/2015 11:23

Does he know exactly how bad some of your family really are?

Roseformeplease · 18/03/2015 11:26

Can you compromise on, say, England (or Scotland / Wales) but far enough away from home that it will still exclude those guests that you want to exclude? Or an out of the way venue where getting there / accommodation would exclude them?

Trinity90 · 18/03/2015 11:26

Nope, he's heard me say how bad they are but not witnessed it ( he has no 'black sheep' in his family) so he can't really relate :/

I know if I invited them, something would go wrong - either ridiculously intoxicated and making a fool of themselves / fighting or stealing things! I dont want that on my mind on the day I marry him..

OP posts:
Trinity90 · 18/03/2015 11:28

Scotland may be a good shout! I'll look into it as I know they have some beautiful castles and scenery :)

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.