I’m getting married in June and sent out Save the Date cards at Christmas. I set the date of the wedding after consulting family and close friends, particularly one friend, S, who has a big birthday coming up in July which I didn’t want to clash with. I have been friends with S for a long time and we got together with our current partners at the same time. I get on her with her boyfriend OK but he doesn’t seem to want to accept us as a couple into their social group so over the years I have ended up mostly seeing her as part of a group of female friends. In the New Year I got an email from S’s boyfriend saying he wasn’t coming to the wedding because he is taking part in a sports event. I strongly suspect that this is an excuse to not go to the wedding. I feel very hurt and basically see this as a rejection of us as a couple and the culmination of lots of small snubs over the years. I also suspect that he will go round crowing to other mutual friends about how he has ‘got out’ of going to the wedding, making it seem a dreary obligation instead of a cause of celebration. S has always buried her head in the sand and pretended there is nothing going on but I feel unable to let this go, even though I may lose her friendship over it, which is the last thing I want to do in the runup to the wedding. I’m also supposed to be going away with her and other friends on her birthday. However I don’t feel unable to plaster a smile on my face and carry on as if nothing has happened. What’s the best way to approach this?
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quietlysuggests ·
05/01/2015 21:39
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