Weaning and milk-Really struggling

(16 Posts)
CuppaSarah Fri 04-Oct-13 09:43:41

Hello! I've been weaning DD who is 7 and a half months old since she was 6 months. As far as food is concerned she is doing amazing and is practically a hoover. But when it comes to milk I'm absolutely struggling and have no idea if where we're at is ok? Basically I went to HV two weeks ago to get her weighed and queried how often she was still feeding, which was about 6 BFs still. The HV said it was too much and just comfort feeding, so it would be a good idea to reduce to 3 feeds then down to 2 by the time she's 8 months.

I've been doing this, one BF in the morning, lunch and bedtime. Then giving her a tippy cup with water the rest of the day, but she refuses water, even if I try from a bottle. She's been tearful and run down these past two weeks too, but that could jsut be coincidence. Today I gave her a bottle of formula for a drink instead, she had 4 ounces after breakfast and was so calm and relaxed and magically not tearful.

Now I'm really scared I'm making her regress and stopping her develop properly by giving her milk and giving it from a bottle when she's this old. The HV implied she shouldn't have milk very often anymore, but she just really seems to enjoy it. The Bottle is one of those ones with handles and she fed herself if that makes a difference? I'm not damaging her am I? Is this ok? Or do I need to sort it out? I just hate not giving her milk knowing how much she loves it. She barely drinks any water either.sad I'm totally at a lose of what to do.

Oh god, what is with these HVs?! Just give her milk! My twins are 8 months and despite eating loads, haven't dropped a single feed. Although the length of some feeds is reducing a bit. And they still have at least 2 feeds in the night.

Milk should their main source of nutrition until 1. Solids should increase over the second six months and be the majority of their intake by a year but even then, if they still have a lot of milk, it's not a major issue (unless there are contraindications eg losing weight, other actual issues).

Please relax about the feeding and enjoy the cuddles and closeness.

NHS weaning advice nothing about limiting milk here so she is talking bollocks

CuppaSarah Fri 04-Oct-13 10:21:51

Thank you both! I feel so much better, I was really really worried I was doing something terribly wrong. But when I look back she didn't seem to be the sort of HV that particularly agrees with breast feeding past 6 months. Normally our local HVs are really really good, so being off the mark one time's not bad going.

noblegiraffe Fri 04-Oct-13 10:22:21

Your HV is talking bollocks. Ff babies should be having at least 20oz of milk till 12 months, and I've never Ffed but I'm pretty sure you couldn't get that into two feeds a day.
My 8 month old still feeds every three hours, as did my DS, who went down to two feeds when I went back to work at 12 months but fed more when I was home.

Feed your baby, ignore the HV.

CuppaSarah Fri 04-Oct-13 13:40:34

I've gone back to following her lead with milk. The change in her has been instant and amazing! She didn't quite hoover up as much lunch as normal, so the poor little girl must have been starving these past two weeks. Thanks for the confidence, very glad to see my happy, cheeky girl back to normal.

noblegiraffe Fri 04-Oct-13 13:46:20

Have you considered complaining about the HV advice? You followed it in good faith and it made your baby run down, hungry and unhappy. It's not only wrong, it's not good for them to cut milk feeds that drastically this early, as you have observed.

Glad she's doing better smile
Stupid HV she is talking bollocks please report her. Milk is supposed to be the main source of nutrition. Let her BF as she wants to.

CuppaSarah Fri 04-Oct-13 13:52:49

I hadn't truth be told. I think I might go back to the clinic and talk with the same HV again before I consider doing that. Seems more fair to talk to her first and make sure no wires were crossed before making a complaint. She also kept rounding DD's age up to 8 months, 2-4 weeks is a very big difference for babies.

my 2 were formula fed and still had 4 bottle feeds at 8 months. DS dropped to 3 feeds around 9 months and was down to 2 feeds by 11 months. I followed their lead rather than just dropping feeds for the sake of it.

happydaze77 Fri 04-Oct-13 15:55:52

Hi OP, glad you're back on track again.
Really shocked at what you were told by the hv though. Perhaps she was confusing breastfeeding with formula feeding? Solids should be in addition to milk for at least the first few months of weaning. I think the current guidelines suggest building up solids gradually, to three meals a day by about 9 months. DD still has 4 feeds a day at 11 months.

Chunderella Sat 05-Oct-13 09:19:06

If HV was confusing bf and ff, that's even worse, because the advice she gave is wrong for both! How is it apparently so common for people to be wrongly told to restrict milk intake for under 1s below what the NHS recommends? I'm sure I remember posting on a very similar thread just a couple of weeks ago.

Canalside Mon 07-Oct-13 08:49:37

I don't really believe in reducing milk feeds at this age without the baby doing it themselves. Every baby is different and none of them have read any textbooks or formula packets!
We've just stopped BFing at 9 months and we're on 3 FFs a day, each 7oz. DD has dropped feeds herself, in her own time, it's pretty obvious when she doesn't want one anymore, and I'm happy to go with what she wants.
Friends of mine are trying really hard to drop feeds on HV advice and their babies really aren't happy (dropping from 3 to 2) at 9 months. I can't see the point really!
So trust your instincts, and I'm glad she's doing better.

mrsmartin1984 Mon 07-Oct-13 18:22:31

Talking out of arse. How are you weaning? If it's BLWing then she is really talking bollocks. If ever anyone mentions "comfort sucking" then ignore. You breast feed, you breastfeed on demand. So when your baby demands less you give less. And because you breastfeed you can't quantify how much your baby is drinking.

My HV asked me how weaning going, "fine"
Has she dropped her milk? "no idea"
Then I walked away leaving her confused.

dontyouknow Tue 08-Oct-13 14:45:23

I asked the HV this morning if I should be cutting down on milk feeds as my greedy DS hoovers down three meals a day and all the milk he used to - he screams if I try to "shortchange him" and give him only half a bottle even if he's just had lunch. (He's 6 months, started weaning at 5 months).

The response I got from the HV was the opposite of yours - don't cut down, he'll cut down when he's ready. I was told he should really be down to 2 feeds by the time he's 12 months or so, so plenty of time.

joanna0211marie Mon 21-Oct-13 20:10:32

The advice I have is babies get the majority of calories from milk, she may just be using your foremilk for a drink so for the hv to say reduce the number is ridiculous, I was given the best advice from an experienced mum and she told me to not bother with the hv and to just do what u feel is right, by all means take her to get weighed but if you do your own thing and she's still thriving then you know who knows best, and in my opinion it's always you! X

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