When your toddler refuses to eat...

[lookout]

...what do you do?

Ds2 (22m) has recently got very picky and often refuses to even taste what I put in front of him, when he would happily scoff it all a couple of months ago. Do you give them an alternative? Or move straight onto pudding (fruit or yogurt in our house)? Or give them nothing else? Or a snack nearer bedtime?? I'm at a loss and just wondered what others do.

[sharond101]

I try distract mine with babytv then spoon it all in but that's not the correct answer I realise.

[lookout]

Dh tried that too. Resulted in a screaming fit (from ds not dh, though the latter was close!)

[ceeveebee]

I have 22 mo twins, often one will not want what they are offered. I just leave it on the highchair tray for a whole and get on with my own food (or something else if I'm not eating with them). Then take the plates away and give then some fruit. Sometimes DS misses a meal entirely. I never spoon feed them - they wouldn't let me if I wanted to, but I just think at this age they're a bit old for that.

[ceeveebee]

whole = while

[lookout]

Mine won't eat from a spoon either now. He didn't eat at all last night, but did have his normal bf at bedtime and hasn't seemed to bother him. Will carry on doing that and hope he gets over his fussiness soon. Thanks.

[throughgrittedteeth]

Well if its not too much of a regular thing and it is something I know he likes I just take it away without fuss and offer nothing else. I would never offer him something sweet and if it was just a sandwich or something I'd cling film and offer again a while later.
My DM is less strict when she has him but my assumption is if he doesn't eat he isn't hungry.

[lookout]

So, no one gives them a snack closer to bedtime? I'd wondered if there was a gap between dinner and bed, if a bedtime snack wouldn't be seen as a replacement for the dinner but rather as a separate 'meal', like a supper perhaps? Don't know if it's necessary though. last night he seemed to get along fine without having had any dinner, and didn't even have a particularly big breakfast

[ceeveebee]

No - but my two do have a cup of warm milk at bedtime. On days where dinner hasn't gone down well, milk is all drunk, on other days they leave it

[sharond101]

I sometimes top up with weetabix if it's been a particularly poor dinner and her seems hungry (hanging onto handle of the biscuit cupbaord making whining noises!). If he doesn't seem hungry then I don't bother.

[lookout]

Ok, thanks all. He has milk before bed anyway, and has never shown signs of being hungry when he's refused dinner so I'll just carry on as is. I seriously hope this fussy stage stops soon though, I hate throwing food away!

[sharond101]

lookout that really gets to me to, especially if you have made something homemade for them. When I know he is in a fussy stage I give him more basic foods and in small portions, if he eats it all I give him something else (sandwich, porridge, custard and fruit) then saves throwing away lots of the good stuff.

Most of DS's dinner went on the floor tonight but I have remained chilled about it, don't suppose he was hungry as the homemade meatballs tasted great!

[FredFredGeorge]

He's probably refusing dinner because he's not hungry, Remember growth rates and activity levels fluctuate a lot so the amount of food they need can change greatly. Offer food, if they don't eat it, fair enough, offer it or something else later - just don't fall into the trap of thinking they have to eat - they don't, they might not be hungry.

[lookout]

Fred I am very guilty of thinking he must be eating three times a day. He's prob not hungry, it doesn't seem to be bothering him, the not eating in the evening. However, yesterday's meatballs and pasta in veg sauce was ignored whereas this evening's pesto pasta and sausage was wolfed down (he left the veg though)

Sharon bugs me too. I might try with the smaller portions thing, but he gets the same thing as his brother, and ds1 would prob turn his nose up at simpler stuff. Neither of them eat potatoes either, except chips

[sharond101]

lookout I've started giving my DS a little soup before we all sit down for dinner as I know he likes it. Then I've tried to make things for DH and I that he can eat from so last night he had some sausage and chicken from our bbq tonight he had some pasta (lots of it!!) so this way I know he has eaten something and I've not had any waste. I've got some pasta leftover so will give him some more tomorrow. I saw a Mum feed her DS some baked potato and beans today and I felt envious as it looked so easy.

[lookout]

May try soup. Just saw a nice recipe for pea and potato so might be worth a try. My biggest problem is veg/veg sauces, he just will not eat them. So last night I made chicken in hidden veg sauce with rice, he picked the chicken out and left the rest . We'll get there eventually, but I'm sticking to my guns in not giving him an alternative. As others say, he won't let himself go hungry!

[sharond101]

We were at a baby group today and DS saw a friend of his eating grapes (lucky Mother to have such an amenable child I thought). He seemed fairly interested in what she was eating so I bought him some grapes. He has so far spent 15 minutes sooking the outside of the grape then squeezing it into the highchair with his drinks beaker. I tried chopping them up and feeding them to him on a spoon or from my finger. He ain't having none of them either. It's a lost cause.

[googietheegg]

When 16 month dd is not in an eating mood she will always eat yoghurt - I buy non-flavored fromage frais. Always will eat a bowl of semi- defrosted raspberries too, and cubes of strong cheddar.

Tbh I would offer something else later, maybe a little sandwich. I don't want food to be a battle ground so I wouldn't make it too tempting, but I also wouldn't bring out tea again the next day.