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What would you think of this text?

(57 Posts)
Broken1Girl Sun 18-Sep-16 20:50:50

Got this from my DSis

Happy Birthday! Hope you had a good day... Sorry, I haven't posted your card yet, had such good intentions but my marriage is suddenly over so my mind has been elsewhere. xx

I am not entirely surprised about the marriage breakdown.
Is it me or is it strange and passive-aggressive to inform me of this in the same text as saying happy birthday? Like I should feel guilty about the effort involved.
If she had wanted to inform me of the marriage issue she could have done so separately. I would have offered support. I guess I feel unwanted.
Am I reading too much into this?

JellyMouldJnr Sun 18-Sep-16 20:53:44

Um, I think you are being over-sensitive. You have a birthday once a year. A marriage breakdown is a major life change.

Rumtopf Sun 18-Sep-16 20:56:29

You're being over sensitive.
Your sister is going through a rough time, offer her support!

Saucery Sun 18-Sep-16 20:56:47

Total DramaLlama- ing from the sender. Drop,your birthday plans and phone them now. Don't even think of trying to have a nice day now <eyeroll>

Lilaclily Sun 18-Sep-16 20:59:46

If you're close I'd be phoning her , not posting on here birthday or not !

cookiefiend Sun 18-Sep-16 21:00:06

Tbf- I imagine it might be hard to break that news to people. If she isn't usually a drama queen I would give her the benefit of the doubt and think it was awkward and she didn't know how to broach it. It may be that it was totally unexpected- he said he was leaving or cheated or something and she is havin g a really tough time. I would call her to see she is ok.

JollyHockeyGits Sun 18-Sep-16 21:01:06

Maybe she doesn't know how to tell everyone so thought it would be a lighthearted jokey way to ease awkwardness?

I would have offered support
Whatever the reason for putting it in the text it sounds like she needs a lot of support, now is not the time to focus on your own feelings or be over-sensitive, just now it should be about her, not you. I really hope you have offered her your support.

SuePermario Sun 18-Sep-16 21:09:53

Doesn't sound like a strange text at all to me, seems like a normal one, she said happy birthday and gave you a reason why you hadn't received her card, what's the problem

fabulous01 Sun 18-Sep-16 21:10:28

This isn't about you. This is about her. For whatever reason her relationship is over. Not always an easy thing to announce to social friends etc

Meeep Sun 18-Sep-16 21:14:05

You are being really weird. Your sister is getting a divorce and you're upset that she told you in your birthday message instead of separately. Does that matter, really? In the nicest possible way - get over yourself.

NicknameUsed Sun 18-Sep-16 21:16:59

I'm with everyone else here.

Yes it's you. No she isn't being passive aggressive. Why haven't you contacted her and offered a shoulder to cry on?

Only1scoop Sun 18-Sep-16 21:17:46

I'd think I'd better call my dsis soon and get together.

NicknameUsed Sun 18-Sep-16 21:18:05

And at least she remembered your birthday in spite of her life falling down around her.

MudCity Sun 18-Sep-16 21:22:01

Her text message is totally acceptable - she gave you a valid reason for not sending a card. No easy way of breaking that news.

Your birthday is minuscule compared with a marriage breakdown.

Houseconfusion Sun 18-Sep-16 21:23:44

Unless this is some sort of a reverse, you are suite unbelievable, really.

Evergreen17 Sun 18-Sep-16 21:23:54

You are reading too much into this. She is struggling with major things here but still wanted to text you. So nope, nothing wrong with that text apart from the fact that her marriage is over and you are worried about your bday hmm

Houseconfusion Sun 18-Sep-16 21:23:54


AyeAmarok Sun 18-Sep-16 21:28:57

Her text is fine.

You'd prefer that she sent you a happy birthday message and then followed up separately so you didn't feel unwanted? confused

You're being a bit of a special snowflake I'm afraid.

goldielookingchain Sun 18-Sep-16 21:29:14

Ffs! She's your sister. Give her a ring and see how she is. Your an adult

Broken1Girl Sun 18-Sep-16 22:45:48

Drop,your birthday plans and phone them now. Don't even think of trying to have a nice day now <eyeroll> well exactly Saucery. confused

BertrandRussell Sun 18-Sep-16 22:49:08

One person agrees with you. That's the post you agree with.

Only1scoop Sun 18-Sep-16 22:49:50


Rudymentary Sun 18-Sep-16 22:54:33

This text was sent at the end of your birthday wasn't it?

So she wasn't intending to spoil your day.

titchy Sun 18-Sep-16 22:55:23

God what a selfish bitch ending her marriage on your birthday.

Psyhke Sun 18-Sep-16 22:57:34

Unless there's some massive back story to this, you're being a bit dramatic with the 'felt unwanted' but then I've never seen the big deal about (my own) birthdays tbh. I hope you've rang her.

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