2 years and four months ago I did the above injury (which was leg broken in 3 places, wheel chair bound for nearly 4 months as I have pre existing disability) after being a complete prat and falling off when horse spooked at trot and then being a complete numpty I landed on my feet with my left leg taking full force as I instinctively protected my right leg as only have half the bone left in that ankle after shattering into dust 15 years earlier... Falling of a pony and landing on my feet. Learn from my errors apparently I do not!
This week after being back in the saddle 18 months I finally put on my big girl pants and braved canter for the first time post injury!
Massive deal for me! I have only very recently accepted that the accident killed my nerve, before that I was riding very infrequently making excuses I didn't fully realise where excuses about how busy I was and how the weather was so poor etc etc. it was only over the last 2 months when I finally decided that I needed to deal with the pony's hacking alone issues as just maybe what was putting me off was the going round in circles in walk and trot boredom as I also had an excuse as to why I wasn't doing any canter work, see this pony only arrived post accident and he bucks and bucks when asked for canter on the lunge.
Started hacking out, on the lead or with company he hacks just fine but alone he has more naps then a pampers factory. Things went well, he gave me issues and I dealt with them. I realised that I can after all ride and did very well riding and competing for others on a semi pro level before the first trying to land like a cat fiasco killed my budding riding career.
Slowly I have been building confidence and pony's fitness as he had done little put stand in the field getting fat all winter and this Sunday shaking like I used to before riding in for a championship jump off I did it. I asked for canter and it was awesome! Fist time it was flawless, was expecting a stick transition given everything but no, I let go of the saddle after a few strides and everything! On the other rein tradition was more ropy, was disunited, he quickly popped in a buck, which I sat easily, sorted out his legs and we where away with the biggest smile on my face, I hadn't even been holding on that time lol!
We did it again on Tuesday just to prove it wasn't a one off moment of shock at being asked for canter for the first time by me moment and he was wonderful, we did two canters on each rein that time including a 20m circle.
I have remembered I can ride. Not there yet, my nerve I now realise was shot to hell, it's not the injury as such, it's not even the permanent damage I did to myself and serious complications to an already complicated disability it caused. That's not what stole my nerve, it was the effects on everybody I loved and cared about that did it, I needed full time care at first and then months and months of help from personal care to family meals cooked, everyone in the village rallied round. My clients where let down at short notice (I'm a freelance groom) and had to make alternative arrangements and in one case change their holiday plans but they are all still my clients, they had me back even after that so it's the very thought of doing that to people again that has held me back. Every one of those people however would hate me to quit and have cheered me on so I am so very very proud of myself to have made such a big step and I really, really needed to share, sorry, as you were 
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Amazing achievement, self proclaimed! (not for the particularly Squamish though I think!)
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RoadKillBunny · 02/04/2014 22:46
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