so i am currently pg with dc2. dc1 will be 22 months when baby arrives. horse is now turned away till baby arrives as me and pregnancy do not mix well lol.
i plan to pick him back up in spring once recovered from birth etc. once i finish mat leave ( will take about 10m) i will be going back to work prob 4 days a week as i do now. please tell me some positive stories about similar situations! with dc1 found it fine with the horse until i went back to work but made my life v hard as i was v pfb with dc1 and made things hard for myself. if i had taken up the help on offer from dh and family it would have made it much easier. yard, work and home are all within 9 miles of each other and yard v flexible re everything really and very laid back. horse is generally laid back too tho i will lower my expectations this time around re amount of riding and the state of my stable lol!
Ok the following was not easy. Had 3 ponies, 1 companion, 1 x 3 yo and 1 6yo. I rode /drove the 2 until I had ds1. I was working full time (on contract so running my own business) some 1hr 15 commute away. I had ds1 by c section and went back to work on same contract but 3 days a week just a fortnight later, else I would have lost the contract and the income! I sold the 3 yo pony a few months later and bought a 3 yo unbroken to break. I carried on the commute working 3 days a week for a further year and kept both ponies in regular work. I changed contract to a commute 1hr 40 away 4 days a week on a better rate. 6 months later I changed to a 4 day a week contract some 1hr 50 commute away on twice the money per hr. By then the 3 yo was going well But I realised 3 ponies were too much work so I sold the youngster. I then found out companion was heading fast to the field in the sky and purchased another older pony for ds to learn on, and I'm currently riding it once a week so still2 ponies to work. Ds is now 2 and a half and I just accepted a permanent full time job some 35 mins commute away. I have no local family and have project managed a mothers help with top quality nursery care to enable me to work and keep the ponies going. I have used a couple of freelance grooms and some fab horsey neighbours to keep everything going. My fella worked abroad at first which made things really challenging but he is now working flexibly close to home and this has made all the difference. I do not know what it would be like with 2 kids but I do know I have spent a fortune on childcare and a mothers help and will continue to do so. It would have been ace if our parents were closer but they are not. I am probably opening myself up for criticism, but I live in a v rural area where horses and livestock in general are your social life. I studied so hard to get where I am as a professional I didn't want to let my career falter and so I've really worked hard and played hard. I have focused on ensuring ds1 has long term relationships with his carers rather than opting for through put of foreign nannys who would have been isolated here. I have spent quality time with ds as much as possible and I don't watch any tv/soaps! I think it you want it enough you can do it, but always have a plan b. good luck
I managed with DC1 and hoss on DIY. Didn't get to ride very much as pretty much solo parenting. Got pregnant again after hoss had moved to a new yard. Completely DIY with no services or anything and managed ok but typically as DC1 got older he used to cry when I pitched up at the yard. It wasn't safe for him to be running around due to horses, dogs, machinery etc. Looking after a toddler and being heavily diffed was hard. I was massive! Plus having no help made everything very difficult. Hoss wasn't particularly settling at new place. I didn't want to deal with sharers again. Long story short I have put him on loan on a 12mth comtract. I'm gutted. But I know I've done the right thing. I've put him first as he is now living the life of luxury as he deserves evenifthinkingabouthimreducesmetotearsandIoftenfeelIhavefailedhim.