pixel my hypnotist wasn't a horse or indeed sports specialist, I think they are more about anxiety generally and often specific things like weight loss and smoking.
I'm not generally a "woo" sort of person, but went into it with an open mind. I was desperate to avoid having to give up my riding, because of all implications in doing that, not least because DH is a horse professional and a scaredy cat wife isn't much use to him!
I took the view that if it didn't work I only stood to lose the £50 and it might just help. Whether it works, whether its the power of suggestion, whether its the positive mindset around doing something about it, I don't know.
Carabos I've been trying to psyche myself up to find a hypnotist or similar. Did you find someone who specialises in horsey matters or someone more general? Also what if you can't pinpoint any one incident that made your nerve vanish like a puff of smoke, can they still help? Having children is definitely part of it all (and having a long break while my old pony was retired and I couldn't afford two) but I was completely fine after I had dd so it's not the whole story. I do think that ds being disabled is one aspect as I'm never going to reach that stage where I think he can be less dependant on me and his future when I'm not around is my main worry in life.
D0G I think you did really well to carry on when you were seeing stars! Sometimes you are too shocked to be scared at the time iyswim. I hope you feel less achey soon.
I know how you feel. I don't really ride anymore. I came off a 13hh pony, at walk I the manège and broke my arm so badly I was out of action for 6 months! I do get on occasionally, but my nerves are shot! Agree too on having children. I always worry what would happen to them if I fell off and broke my neck! I live vicariously through dd now!
The thing that has changed most since my accident is that I always wear a bump cap now. Never did before schooling and not always hacking. I'm not ready for a back protector and air bag yet - when I feel I need those it will be time to stop.
Carabos, that sounds awful I bet all the time of being unable to ride made it so much worse. I'm loads better today. I have to ride horse over for dh's lesson so looking forward to getting back on tbh.
Sim you're right I guess that sounds wrong but according to instructer I was riding a I should be and i couldnt have done anything different and it was just an accident on his part, I guess people fall over too.
That sounds very frightening, and entirely understandable that you feel shaken up. Try not to dwell on what might have happened - it didn't happen.
My horse bucked me off a year ago November - I broke my wrist so was unable to get back on for weeks. I was so scared I felt sick at the thought of riding him and when I did, it felt worse each time. DH was abroad, so he couldn't help me ( he's a trainer).
I got on one evening in the indoor arena and my lovely friend and her mum sat there with me so I felt a bit safer. Unfortunately another friend came in on her cob who is my horse's arch enemy. Mine went past him once, plotting his attack, then danced sideways, bucked and kicked out. I thought I would literally throw up. My friend put her hand on my leg and said "you never moved" - I felt like I was thrown round like a rag doll.
In the end, after weeks of this, I booked a session with a hypnotherapist / NLP practitioner. We went through every tiny detail of the accident, why it happened ( he was very fresh having had months off with a leg and we were riding up the lane when the horses in the adjoining field went for a burn) and how I felt, including what I imagined would happen.
During the hypnosis she focussed on two things. First, that I bred this horse, have ridden it without any other incident for 10 years and haven't fallen off any horse for almost all of that time, meaning that this was an unusual occurrence and on the basis of evidence not sensible to now think it would happen every time I rode.
Next she made me replay the accident in my head over and over at speed, backwards to the point just before it happened. Over and over and over, feeling the feelings, the fear etc and told me to do that before I rode him. I think the idea is to desensitise you.
I had one session, it cost £50 and while I wouldn't say I walked away cured, I was certainly able to move on and now I would say I'm back to normal - or about 90% of normal. There's a residual slight lack of trust, because now I know he can be naughty, where I didn't think that before, but I'm ok.
Kind friends also let me ride their steady eddies - mine is fairly highly tuned- which meant I was able to ride without having to be hyper-aware. All in all, a pretty challenging experience and not one I'd care to repeat at my advanced age. Obviously having a broken wrist was a ball-ache to deal with too.
Poor you! The instructor is right, there is very little you can do to stay on when a horse falls on its knees, all its weight pushes you out of the saddle but you are too close to the ground to do a proper somersault to end up on your bum so you land forward facing on your head and neck.
If you are still in pain do get it looked at.
Well done for getting back on I am sure that made a huge difference psychologically, but I wouldn't be doing the show. Book another lesson on a more reliable horse and build your confidence back up. Shows are high stress situations and if you are feeling worried it may transmit to your horse which may make things worse for both of you.
I have definitely found as I get older I am losing my nerve more, and thinking of all the 'what if's' far more. I don't know how Mary King still does it tbh.
Also harder if you haven't had a fall for a long time.
Try Rescue Remedy on the big day, a squirt for you and one for the horse too - I always used to with my nutty horse. Placebo effect maybe, but it helped.
And long term, be kind to yourself - if it is no longer pleasurable then there's no shame in retiring from the scary stuff and sticking to dressage or happy hacking. If you're tense and scared, things are more likely to go awry.
You'll probably tell me you're only 19 or something now. I speak from the wise old scaredy-cat age of 46
I rode dh's horse who I'm sure always tries to kill me! He was being a bit silly and trying to run past the jump and didnt concentrate, went over it (3ft6) then tripped and fell silly clumsy cob!
He went down on his knees and face and I flew over the top, I kind of catapulted and landed on my neck and head. Riding instructer said it wasn't my fault and she too would have come off but I think she was just being kind. I did hurt myself quite badly and I was so scared he was going to land on me.
i really saw stars and felt a bit confused after, she made my lie still for a moment. I did get back on and do it again, my shoulder was agony but I knew if I didn't I'd never jump again. I know it sounds wimpy but I felt quite tearful all of yesterday evening and I'm still sore now.
I'm meant to be show jumping on Sunday I feel quite nervous about it now though. I have to get past this don't I?