New school and pregnancy... advice please!

(11 Posts)
LoraTheExplorer Tue 28-Jun-16 21:04:18

Will my new school hate me if I get pregnant over the summer?!

I will be starting at a new school in September. I've been having ongoing fertility treatment for about 18 months now with no success. We did an IVF cycle in April and although I sadly didn't get pregnant we have 4 really good quality embryos in the freezer! At the time I was devastated and decided to forget about TTC for a while (which is when I applied for other jobs!). But now that the summer is looming I'm thinking it would be a perfect time to continue with IVF - perfect apart from my new job!

I am 36 so time isn't really on my side and am absolutely desperate to be a mum but also I love my job and don't want my new school to hate me if I arrive in September and announce a pregnancy shortly after.

My husband says we need to just go for it as even if my new colleagues are funny about it, it will all blow over! Plus it might not even work anyway! My heart is telling me to just go for it but my head is telling me that I need to be sensible and establish myself at my new school first especially as I know I'll be in year 6.

I could wait for a couple of months but then would need to take time off for scans etc and I found being secretive and trying to get time off etc so stressful during my cycle in April that I'm sure the stress of that contributed to it not working.

Sorry for the long post, I guess I want to know if anyone has been in this position or knows of anyone who has?

apple1992 Tue 28-Jun-16 21:06:10

Go for it! Put yourself first. Not ideal for the school, but I think you'd regret it other wise. Plus, it's pretty common x

Lekkamrat Tue 28-Jun-16 21:12:31

Put yourself first! You would never get pregnant as a teacher if you waited for a convenient time!

MrsChrisPratt Tue 28-Jun-16 21:15:25

Do it.

MaybeDoctor Tue 28-Jun-16 21:29:16

Just go for it - I became pregnant in a new teaching post. However, that turned out to be my only opportunity to have a child (secondary infertility, now over 40). No regrets whatsoever!

CodewordRochambeau Wed 29-Jun-16 00:24:11

Continue with the IVF. when you look back, will you regret more pissing off your school slightly or missing out on your opportunity to become a parent?

DitheringDiva Wed 29-Jun-16 10:41:22

Just go for it. It's happened many many times before, when a new teacher has announced a pregnancy on the first day of starting work at a new school. That's life, women get pregnant, and if they didn't, none of us would have a job. Headteachers a paid to deal with exactly this kind of thing. I would also be open about the IVF etc, at least with the headteacher - it's much better if they know. Yes, the headteacher's heart will sink when you tell them, but a good head teacher will not let that show, but will give you their blessing and then start making plans for someone to cover for you when you're off.

Belager Wed 29-Jun-16 18:37:14

I started my school in sept, I'm 34 weeks pregnant now. School have been v supportive. Put you first. Good luck!

LottieDoubtie Wed 29-Jun-16 18:43:29

I agree put yourself first. If they are funny about it then that will be difficult for a few months- you still won't regret the whole life of your child! The summer is an ideal time for appointments etc too, so crack on!

LoraTheExplorer Thu 30-Jun-16 19:04:18

Thanks all, this is so positive and makes me feel better about going ahead!

Sorry for delayed reply - we had the Ofsted call yesterday so I went into panic mode! It went great today though (just a one day visit) so now time for wine

Minispringroll Thu 30-Jun-16 21:45:43

I found out that I was pregnant a few days before starting my new job. We'd been ttc for quite a few years and were about to start ivf. (I explained about that when I informed them of the pregnancy...which was quite early on. I'm generally quite open about the whole situation. I've had a few losses and was a bit worried that it would happen again. 16 weeks now and all going well.) School have been great. It's not the most convenient thing and possibly not the greatest timing ever...but sometimes such things can't be helped. Schools cope. Children cope.

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