Need a teachers point of view please

(8 Posts)
wecanmanagenow Thu 04-Jun-15 22:23:04

This is my first post and need some advice, not sure if I'm posting in the correct thread. My daughter came home from school today and told me her teacher had told her a secret, I asked what the secret was and she got very upset, in our home I've always told the children that you don't keep secrets from mummy and daddy unless it's about presents etc.

My daughter told me the secret which was in relation to another child in the class. But she was very upset at the thought of breaking the teachers trust. I feel I need to approach the teacher but I don't want to cause any Ill will.
So I'm asking for advice on the best way to handle this.

thatsn0tmyname Thu 04-Jun-15 22:26:35

That sounds very odd. I would contact your daughter's head of year.

wecanmanagenow Thu 04-Jun-15 22:29:13

She's in primary school, the secret was more explaining the other child's special needs but I think it was unfortunate phrasing. I don't want to seem like "that parent" but the situation has made me feel very uncomfortable

satine Thu 04-Jun-15 22:37:12

I work in a school and believe me, use of the word 'secret' is a big no-no, especially
In the context of a teacher using it to a child. i might approach someone in a pastoral
Care position at the school and ask them to look into this.

wecanmanagenow Thu 04-Jun-15 22:45:44

Thanks I'll do that tomorrow morning. I just wanted a second opinion that my thinking was correct

Euphemia Fri 05-Jun-15 07:13:50

Definitely take it up at school - I can see what the teacher was trying to do, but asking children to keep secrets is the wrong way to express it.

MrsUltracrepidarian Fri 05-Jun-15 17:50:59

use of the word 'secret' is a big no-no

yy - first rule of safeguarding!
In any case, even if meant well, is a terrible burden to put on a small child who will see it as a responsibility they will terrified of failing.

wecanmanagenow Fri 05-Jun-15 18:00:30

I have spoken to the teacher and understand why it was said. It's to try to foster understanding of why a child behaves the why she does. The teacher has apologised for using the word and it slipped out.

We have both spoken to my daughter about secrets and that you don't have any from mummy. Also explained that she has knowledge of another child so she can't tell anyone else, all done in an age appropriate manner.

I think everything has been handled well. Thanks to everyone for your comments and advice

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