Teaching in same school as your own children

(12 Posts)
goldenlilliesdaffodillies Fri 02-May-14 21:27:27

I am a part time teacher and teach both my children. This part is generally OK (writing their reports is interesting though!).

The trouble I find is that it can be very lonely being both a teacher and parent in the same school. I feel I don't fit into either camps and have to be very careful what I say to either group. We were recently told on a training day, never be friends with parents. Be friendly but never friends. In my experience some parents will try and dig for information when I have my 'parent' hat on and it can be really uncomfortable at times. Birthday parties or social events can be very tricky. I have another 8 years of being a parent at this school. It can also be awkward when in the staff room too.

How do other teachers in similar situations manage this situation?

Philoslothy Fri 02-May-14 23:08:55

I teach at my children's school, have no real issues tbh. I am in quite a senior position so quite visible and everyone in the village knows who I am .

We hold parties and social events which parents may attend , I just make clear that I don 't discuss school out of hours.

goldenlilliesdaffodillies Sat 03-May-14 11:12:15

Thanks for your reply.
There are many major changes going on in our school which makes things abit more tricky than usual.

MissMillament Sat 03-May-14 11:12:27

We were recently told on a training day, never be friends with parents. Be friendly but never friends.

That is a bizarre and unworkable edict imo. Communities are intertwined in all sorts of ways. I have frequently taught the children of friends - am I supposed to stop being friends with them while their children are in my class. Obviously, you do your best to keep the two sides of your life separate and not discuss school issues outside working hours.
WRT having your own children in the school you teach, my children are fine with this and obviously I am also respectful of the colleagues who teach them and try not to have conversations about my children without specifically arranging this. IME the most awkward situations can come from teaching the children of colleagues.

goldenlilliesdaffodillies Mon 05-May-14 09:45:36

Yes teaching staff children can also be tricky!
As our school often involves being there from 8am to 7pm sometimes (and lessons not finishing until 5.30pm as it's a Prep School), it seems depressing to think that you can't have any friends there!

breward Mon 05-May-14 18:00:31

I taught at the same school as my children and was actually both their first teacher as I teach EYFS.

It worked out really well and it was lovely being such a big part of their childhood. I saw them at play, mixing with their peers, eating lunch etc. I never missed an assembly, a school production or a sports day. We always travelled to school together and went home together. When it was a staff meeting a LSA's teenage daughter would pick them up, take them back to her house for a couple of hours then drop them back to school. It was a flexible babysitting arrangement which worked well.

I have no regrets choosing my school as the children's primary school, and to be honest, would not have wanted them taught anywhere else.

exexpat Mon 05-May-14 18:27:50

My mother taught at the school I went to from age 8 to 15, and I don't remember it ever being a problem - though she taught in the senior school, where there is less day to day contact with parents, and it was part boarding as well. She only taught me for one year, but taught friends of mine all the way through.

She became very friendly with the parents of some of my friends, and of course as some of the other staff members were also family friends, I saw a lot of them in their off-duty guises (e.g. rolling drunk at parties). It was never a big issue back then, but I suppose ideas on professional behaviour are a bit stricter these days.

dannydyerismydad Mon 05-May-14 18:34:45

DH went to the secondary school that his mother taught at and his father was deputy head at. He hated it and feels that he was singled out by some teachers who didn't get on with one or other parent. This was at least 20 years ago, so I would like to hope things are different now. He would have loved to have been given the option to choose a different school though.

thatmum50 Tue 13-May-14 19:47:51

I don't have first hand experience with this but can imagine working at the same school as your children would be a larger problem at secondary level than primary.

KinkyDorito Tue 13-May-14 20:47:32

I taught at secondary with my DD there. I stipulated that I would not teach her, which was easy to avoid given the size of the school. I never saw her unless I went out of my way to and it was fine.

More issues living in the area and the social repercussions. I have moved school and hope this improves. I have never been into any of the local pubs for a meal, for example. I don't really drink, but would dread the scrutiny. It's a real pain.

Ferguson Tue 13-May-14 21:53:09

Our DS was at a primary school where the Head had his own child there, and I don't recall any problems.

knitknack Tue 13-May-14 22:23:37

I teach my ds1, who's in year 8... I love it, and luckily so does he smile. It's a small, friendly school and he's one of 6 pupils who are the children of teachers. It's really nice - and there's a gang of them hanging out when we have meetings etc!

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