Keeping going when you feel like flicking the Vs instead??

(9 Posts)
teacherandguideleader Sun 02-Dec-12 07:13:53

Partystress - you must work at my old school!

I left at the end of last year, just couldn't take it any more. Constantly being under scrutiny and in fear of SLT who make a judgement on you based on 10 seconds in your room. I knew I needed to find somewhere new after getting 4s on observations but knowing I wasn't a 4 (I wasn't the only one this happened to). After I resigned I suddenly started getting 2s on the ridiculous amount of observations we had (and this was based on the new tougher framework, whereas the 4s were based on the old one).

I have moved schools and it has been hard. I don't think that fear of hearing the door open and a member of SLT standing there will ever go away. It is different at my new school though, people care and support each other. They accept that it isn't always the teacher's fault - sometimes it is the kids. I started my new school with zero self confidence and gave myself a year to decide if it was the career for me. I love the kids, I love the teaching, I enjoy planning lessons (not so much enjoyment for the marking but hey ho!). Slowly my confidence is rising and I've made a good impression at my new school. What was seen as 'part of your job' at my last school is seen as 'going the extra mile' here. I got a 2 on my observation as well.

SLT were something to be feared at my last school, at my new one they join us for lunch and even for cups of tea in the staffroom.

It's not you - it's your school.

eviekingston Sun 25-Nov-12 20:04:41

Partystress that all sounds depressingly familiar. Staff morale at our 'outstanding' school is very low, and the pressure is constant. The Head does genuinely seem to believe that without her constantly on our backs we would be in special measures.. (Never mind that we've maintained our Outstanding status for 15 years and she's only been there for 4...) We have a strict dress code and were recently told that the workplace is not a place for friendships, but for professional relationships, and we shouldn't talk to each other AT ALL when on playground duty. Because of course, if we weren't told these things, we would be sat gossiping all day ignoring the piteous cries of neglected children whilst dressed head to toe in ripped denim and piercings.
Would love to leave, but hard to find part time jobs in primary at UPS level..
And most of the time we manage to ignore the madness and just enjoy teaching the kids..

partystress Sun 25-Nov-12 06:43:28

lecce - lovely twaddle, thank you flowers. And yes, for the first time I think I might talk to the union because the pattern in our school is that you fall out of favour and then even though nothing has changed, your obs ratings suddenly plummet. I know I am good at what I do - the feedback from parents, children and my class's progress all tell me that. I think I do need to get out of this school before my confidence as well as my enthusiasm is eroded. It is a shame because I love everything about it except the way we are managed/'led'. Cardibach, hope you do find something. Your HT sounds cynical on top of the usual SLT sins.

cardibach Sat 24-Nov-12 22:31:27

You are right, and I am looking. VEry rural area, though, so not many schools sad

Arisbottle Sat 24-Nov-12 22:12:01

I do think this is about your school rather than teaching as a whole . Life is too short to make yourself miserable because of another job. Look for a different school

cardibach Sat 24-Nov-12 22:08:20

I recognise it, Arisbottle. And I get pissed off with it, too. I cnstantly feel as though somone is looking over my shoulder and judging me wanting, despite the fact that my pupils routinely meet or exceed FFT predictions. I agree it can be a problem with your SLT. FOr examle, recently we had a visit from LEA advisors. THey made a comment about the organisation of KS4 folders (I think that is their business, but hey ho) so we got some dividers and helped them organise. Headteacher then took in folders, without saying hat she was looking for (how stupid is that) and, when they wer in fact organised siad to the HoD 'I saw you had done a damage limitation exercise'. No, you stupid bitch, we had taken the advice of LEA advisors. For CHrist's sake.
So, OP, yes, I feel as you do.

lecce Sat 24-Nov-12 21:35:17

I know just what you mean about the assumptions thing. I feel like you do every now and then but then something good will happen and I'll feel the love for it again.

It does sound like SLT at your school is rubbish. Is there anyone more supportive you could talk to? Would it be worth speaking to a union rep if they are changing your PM objectives in such an unreasonable manner?

I'm sorry I can't be more constructive but I'm sure you are doing a fabulous job for the pupils and that they appreciate that. Look after yourself and do the essential stuff but don't exhaust yourself if you can help it. You are worth more to your pupils (and your own dc) refreshed and healthy.

Sorry that is useless twaddle smile. really hope you have a better week next week.

Arisbottle Sat 24-Nov-12 20:21:44

If I felt like that I would at least change schools and possibly career.

I do not recognise those assumptions about state education

partystress Sat 24-Nov-12 15:58:00

Love teaching, but hate the ridiculous parent/naughty child model of leadership that comes with it. Thoroughly sick of the whole world of state education being based on the assumption that all teachers would:
- coast along doing a thoroughly crap job unless the threat of a no notice drop in/learning walk/OFSTED/peer review was hanging over their heads
- not have an idea in their heads of how to teach unless continually bombarded with new flavours of the month, complete with accompanying acronyms and bizaare methods of marking/evidence gathering.

Feel like I might have reached a final straw point now. I queried a ridiculously unachievable target being inserted into my objectives with no discussion and a demand that I sign immediately (while in class) - the response from my line manager was to imply that I didn't want to challenge all children, and then to shout a sarcastic 'Have a nice day' on leaving.

I have managed to mark one box of books today, but having spent most of yesterday evening in tears of frustration, shouted at my own DCs, and woken up with a banging headache, I am finding it hard to muster the motivation to tackle the other two boxes or start on this week's planathon. Tips on how to regain my mojo would be gratefully received.

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