My morning has got off to a sad start

(42 Posts)

I was taking DS1 to school and I noticed a cat had been killed on the dual carriageway. I made a mental note, so I could retrieve it and go and get it scanned for a chip.

On the way home I scooped it up and put it in a bag, and called on my neighbour to ask when her vets opened. (Nearer than ours)

She answered the door in tears looking very distressed as her cat had not come back last night. It quickly became apparent that the cat I had scooped up was her beloved little cat.

I feel horrible. My poor neighbour,. What a shock. sad

Oh that is so awful. It was very good of you to pick up the cat. At least she hasn't been left wondering what happened. Are you close to the dual carriageway? Do your cats go anywhere near there?

I am stressing about the conversation we had, it was all a blur. i am worried I said something I shouldn't IYKWIM. I didn't get chance to ask about the vet so she was probably wondering why I rang the doorbell at all. <worries>

No that's the thing thecat, I never thought it would be any of the neighbourhood cats as it was a good distance away. No idea what she was doing there at all, most of the cats never even leave their own garden round here.

Trazzletoes Tue 26-Mar-13 09:19:43


I'm sure you didn't say anything wrong. If you did, then I'm sure it can be ironed out in the next few weeks when she is feeling a little less raw.

How lovely of you to pick the cat up though. I would really hope someone would do this for one of mine if they were killed on the road.

I couldn't leave it trazzle. Luckliy the cat was in the gutter so quite scoopable IYKWIM. I just thought a quick trip to the vets and they could tell the owner. sad

I remember saying 'I have a cat in my boot' or some such nonsense.

I am sure she will be nothing but grateful to you. And when the initial shock has worn off you can explain to her exactly what happened. It really is so, so sad. I find I can cope with the death of my cats quite well (I have so many old and ill ones it's a common occurance), but I've never had to deal with any sort of accidental death and I just know I would go to pieces if that happened.

She has other cats. They will be wondering where the little one is. I can't stop thinking about it. sad

I think I'm just a bit shocked. My neighbour said she would come over later, so we will have a cuppa and a chat.

You know when you just don't want to do anything? I was supposed to be going shopping and doing some cooking but don't want to now.

We lost our little cat a few years ago and she was found dead. The not knowing was awful, and I did feel some peace when she was found.

I know exactly how you feel about not being able to do anything. A couple of years ago a dog attacked my neighbour's cat in the street. I heard the noise and ran outside (in bare feet and nightie) to try to fight the dog off. Within seconds about 8 neighbours were in the street trying to get the cat off the dog. There was blood everywhere and the noise was horrendous. But between us we managed it and I rushed the cat to the vet and, even though they thought he might lose his leg, as it turned out he made a quick and full recovery. However for the rest of that entire day I was completely unable to function at all - I could manage to sit and drink tea sort of staring into space, but absolutely nothing else at all, all day.

I think you are very kind hearted to have scooped up the poor cat. I don't have a cat anymore but not knowing what had happened to it would be awful. Better to know IYSWIM.

Is it definitely your neighbour's cat? There is no delicate way of putting this. Did she look at it? Just thinking what if she buries it and her little cat turns up.

I am sorry you've had such an upsetting start to the day sad but you did a good thing.

cozietoesie Tue 26-Mar-13 10:07:19

You did a kindness, Sparkling. That's all she'll remember - even though I'm pretty sure you won't have said anything inappropriate.

WeAreSix Tue 26-Mar-13 10:10:57

Oh sparkling that is sad.

I'm sure the conversation is as much a blur to her as it is to you. You're both in shock. Lovely of you to be so caring.

Owllady Tue 26-Mar-13 10:14:28

Gosh how weird that it was her cat

Hope you are okay

Oh how sad sad But brilliant that you picked up the cat. I once moved a cat from the road to the verge when I was about 15.

It was still warm when I picked it up - but I just couldn't bear the thought of someone seeing their gorgeous ginger cat squashed (it was a busy road, and chances are it would have very quickly become unrecognisable).

Hi all, sorry I disappeared. Just had a lovely long chat over a cup of tea with my neighbour. The cat was definitely hers (she looked bigger which is why I didn't click I think-plus no collar). She is now buried in her garden.

The neighbour said she was glad that it was me who found her, and rang the doorbell. smile

I feel bit better-still a bit wibbly. But I am going to do some baking I think, to distract myself.

Phew. What a morning.

foxache Tue 26-Mar-13 13:06:03

It was so nice of you to pick the cat up, good for your neighbour to at least know what had happened. What a sad experience for you both though.

I think i now can't believe that the beautiful little cat is gone. sad

greenhill Tue 26-Mar-13 13:49:17

You did a really kind thing. It will make a big difference to your neighbour, knowing what happened to her cat, and at least you'd rescued its body before it was unrecognisable. Poor little cat. sad

Here are some flowers

Thanks greenhill. I didn't think it would affect me this much.

foxache it's horrible when they just get completely flattened. I was so glad I got to her while she was still her IYKWIM. sad

Darmont Tue 26-Mar-13 13:52:10

I would appreciate it if my cat, you sound like a nice neighboursmile

Iwouldratherbemuckingout Tue 26-Mar-13 15:15:22

That's a lovely kindness you have done.

Thanks. It just feels odd at the moment.

weegiemum Tue 26-Mar-13 15:39:45

Lovely of you.

At our old house, our cat vanished (middle of the country, literally miles from anywhere)

A neighbour saw a dead cat that looked like ours by the side of the road.

We collected it, buried it.

5 days later our cat turned up at our back door!!!

This was nor easy to explain to 5yo dd1!

Oh no weegie shock. But saying that I would be overjoyed if her little cat appeared again.

weegiemum Tue 26-Mar-13 18:14:52

Despite her jags (that we got religiously) she died of leukaemia 2 years later.

You are so kind to pick the cat up. Mine don't wear collars and I always worry that if something were to happen to one of them a passer-by might see no collar and not bother - it's that extra bit of bother to go to the vet, takes a cat lover and/or a good person to do it.

sad weegie. I breaks your heart whenever they go.

Dont Sparkling Cat doesn't wear a collar. She lost four in a week and we had to give up. She is chipped, but I know what you mean.

Strangely the neighbour's cat always wore a collar, but it was missing when I found her. confused

Didn't sleep a wink. Can't stop going over it all. sad

cozietoesie Wed 27-Mar-13 08:17:17

It's a death and of course you'll be upset by it for a bit. It will likely also, at some level, have brought back thoughts of your own little cat who was found dead - and also sparklingcat's future.

Myself, I'd go and see how the neighbour is doing, take her a cake or something. Surprisingly, that would probably help you as much as her - and she may not have people to talk to about it. Some folks can be quite cold when someone's animal dies (the 'It was only a cat' brigade.)

Chin up.

bootsycollins Wed 27-Mar-13 08:22:50


cozie you are so right. I am a bit of an overthinker too, trying to work out if i could have handled things better. Plus I am a bit over protective of Sparkling Cat.

I am off out with Mum today so will definitely get my neighbour something and maybe some Dreamies for her other cats. smile

Thanks for the flowers bootsy. smile

Well i feel better now. I bought my neighbour a candle, and a plant to go by the grave, and some treats for the other cats.

Before I had a chance to go over, she brought me a beautiful bouquet of roses.

Yesterday seems a bit surreal now, but everyone's ok.

cozietoesie Wed 27-Mar-13 19:16:19


crazynanna Wed 27-Mar-13 19:23:20

<<<<hugs>>>> Sparkling

You did a lovely thing, and so deserved the roses smile

greenhill Wed 27-Mar-13 19:25:14

Pleased to hear you are feeling better after yesterday's events x

SecretLindtBunny Wed 27-Mar-13 19:26:52

A friend of a neighbour picked up our Ebony from the road and buried him. The day after, he was speaking to our neighbour and described him to our neighbour and she let my mum know.
We were gutted about him, but knowing someone had had the kindness to pick him up and look after him made it easier to cope with.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Wed 27-Mar-13 19:31:22

Oh Sparkling I remember you from the other thread about the lady who found her cat on the drive. Not a good week. sad

You are all lovely. It's nice to have people that understand. Not the 'ewww I couldn't pick up a dead cat' people I have encountered who haven't a clue.

I am trying to treat Sparkling Cat normally. smile

Gay40 Sat 30-Mar-13 20:59:20

It might be a dead cat but to someone it's a much loved part of the family. We found our cat dead in a garden, brought her home and cried a bit, then made the necessary arrangements.
A few hours later our very much alive cat walked up the path hmm

We tried to find out who had lost a cat that looked like ours, but no luck.

Exactly Gay.

That's two people on the thread burying cats they thought were theirs. How I wish that was the case for my neighbour.

Deceased cat's 'brother' is looking all over for her. It's heartbreaking.

bootsycollins Sat 30-Mar-13 22:41:08

Gay arw somebody's cat never returned home, that's so sad for the owner.

We were devastated when our lovely boy died after being hit by a car, his cat friend called round for him at the back door as usual every day for at least 6 months after he died sad

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