Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

1 2

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

The litter tray

What to do re: PIL dog?

42 replies

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 11:24

I have name changed for this as it is quite identifying. We are due our first baby in a couple of weeks and I am very happy for PIL to visit soon after birth.

We have 2 happy and contented indoor cats (our fur babies!) and live in a relatively small 2 bedroom flat.

PIL have a massive dog (labrador crossbreed) and I adore him but he is very big and excitable and knocks everything over/jumps up etc. He is perfectly safe, just boisterous.

We sometimes have my mum's teeny tiny little dog round and the cats hate her though they do tolerate her now, so I know they will not be able to cope with a dog of PIL's size and energy. Unfortunately PIL have no one to leave dog with. I think they think I would be happy to have the dog round ours because they know how much I love him, and ordinarily I would be, but I don't want our cats to be stressed when they may already be stressed by a new baby.

WWYD? Bite the bullet and say he's got to go in kennels when they come to visit? It would only be a couple of hours' visit, not an overnight stay. Or is there a way I could shut the cats in the spare bedroom (their main sleeping room) with food and litter - that would be really mean, right?

Thoughts welcome!

OP posts:

Report

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 08/01/2016 11:28

I would not allow a dog in to my cat's home. It's his safe, happy, relaxing place - no stress for him is permitted.

(The wrong flavour cat food does not class as stress, whatever OldBoy thinks )

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 11:32

yes I think you might be right milk.

It took ages before they would accept my mum's dog being in the house. They don't mind her now but they will swipe at her if she gets close. But she is old, sick and not interested in them. V different from PIL dog.

OP posts:

VimFuego101 · 08/01/2016 11:33

If they're only coming for a couple of hours, can you not shut it in the kitchen? Does it have a crate?

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 11:48

vim I think he would go batshit insane in a crate, he's just too big. He's like a cross between a labrador and a great dane.

Plus our kitchen is utterly miniscule, there wouldn't be any floor space!

OP posts:

cozietoesie · 08/01/2016 13:02

I'd have thought the cats would be fine in the spare room for a couple of hours - what's more important is can you cope with the dog?

If it's just been in a car for a journey, will one of them not need to take it for a decent walk?

ArmfulOfRoses · 08/01/2016 13:05

Can't they just leave it at home if they're only coming for a couple of hours?
Surely they go to town or out for a meal occasionally?

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:05

cozie oh yes I can cope with the dog, I love him to pieces.

Yes, they'll need to take him for a walk definitely but there is a park just opposite our flat so that won't be an issue.

OP posts:

gleam · 08/01/2016 13:06

Can they leave it at home, with a dogwalker coming round?

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:06

armful it will take them about 90 minutes or so to drive to us, so you are talking a good 4/5 hours in total...too long for him to be left.

OP posts:

cozietoesie · 08/01/2016 13:06

True. Or that.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 08/01/2016 13:08

I disagree cozie. While the cats might be fine for a couple of hours, their home will continue to smell of dog even after it's gone. That is even more likely to cause stress I would have thought.

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:09

I doubt it milk, we have had other (admittedly) smaller dogs visit us and they always perfectly fine once the dog is gone.

they are not that clever

OP posts:

cozietoesie · 08/01/2016 13:09

Sorry - that was a response to Armful. (Fingers frozen by the cold here.) I'd put the cats in the spare room with all their facilities and have the dog taken out for a solid walk/throwstick session shortly after arrival. Should be fine.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 08/01/2016 13:11

Oh bless them

OldBoy wasn't front of the queue for brains either

cozietoesie · 08/01/2016 13:13

I'm thinking of a solution, Milk, and not necessarily the perfect one. My own elderly boy is currently in a known place and roundly ignoring the goings on outside/ in the rest of the house. I think it would work fine.

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:15

I'll get DH to float the idea of a dog walker or kennels for the day. Otherwise will shut my two away with plenty of treats.

It wouldn't be so much of an issue if the dog wasn't so enormous or if he was well-trained but he really has no boundaries and thinks he is a person (entirely PIL fault!).

OP posts:

Borninthe60s · 08/01/2016 13:18

Sugges dog stays in car for their visit as there will be so much paraphernalia with newborn and you feel a bit anxious about it all. Say you're perhaps being overly worried but for the first visit you'd appreciate it if the dog wasn't present. Start as you mean to go on.

ArmfulOfRoses · 08/01/2016 13:19

I wouldn't want a large, untrained dog around a brand new baby.
I would be saying it either stays elsewhere or is shut in your kitchen for the visit.

If the dog is destructive and is likely to chew your units, then decision would be made for me.

cozietoesie · 08/01/2016 13:20

I've not known cats to be interested in dog size as much as dog character to be honest. A small terrier with eg ratting bloodlines would have caused more angst in my experience than a great big flobbler.

Mine have mostly regarded dogs as great big stupid lumps.

I take your point though. A Hound of the Baskervilles can feel quite overwhelming in a small space.

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:21

I wouldn't want a large, untrained dog around a brand new baby

I take your point of course but he is fine around newborns, PIL already have several grandchildren. He doesn't pay them much attention truth be told, he is way more interested in food, other animals, and sitting on people for cuddles.

There is no way I could shut him in the kitchen, he would barely have room to lie down!

He's not a chewer, just big and bouncy.

OP posts:

ArmfulOfRoses · 08/01/2016 13:22

Honestly, it won't be long until you want to have the baby in a bouncer, or on a playmat, then comes crawling and cruising.
I would just approach as if you know that pil know the dog stays at home from now on (not just first visit).
Just breezily enquire what they are doing with the dog as obviously visits will need to be people only from now on.

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:25

but armful, I can't never have the baby around the dog ever or we won't be able to visit PIL in their own home either.

TBH if we rule out having baby around any big dogs I would be cutting out my entire family too as they all have dogs...big and small.

OP posts:

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

ArmfulOfRoses · 08/01/2016 13:27

No but you can choose to not have large, untrained dog (your words) in your child's home.

QforCucumber · 08/01/2016 13:28

I would also be suggesting they leave the dog at home, surely a walk before they leave and another on their return would be sufficient for a 5 hour round trip visit?

Do they not go out without the dog for a few hours normally ever??

dogvcatcat · 08/01/2016 13:31

Q no, their DC left home years ago and they are one of those couples to whom the dog is their baby.

MIL massively disapproves of my own mother because we always trained our dogs to be left for 2-3 hours...sometimes longer. They don't think dogs should ever be left. I've never known them to leave him home alone for more than 2 hours max tbh.

I have made a rod for my own back here because they know how much I love the dog. SIL won't have him in her house at all as she is totally anti animals in general, so PIL are already saying 'oh well we can all meet up at dogvcatcats then'. But I cannot have SIL, BIL, DN, PIL, DP, Me, baby, 2 cats and giant dog in our little flat!!

We are going to have to be assertive, aren't we.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.