New Kitten Crying A Lot/ Being Violent!

[seraphex]

Hey!

So my partner and I got a new kitten on Friday, a very cute british blue called Arnie. He was very affectionate to start with and had been properly litter trained by his breeder - no issues at all there. We do however keep him in the kitchen at night and when we are at work, as he has become very boisterous and attacks any cable/ foot/ arm/ vase he can see. Unfortunately he cries incessantly when he is not been played with especially when he is shut into the kitchen. He also seems to be a lot less affectionate now than he was 5 days ago.

Is there anything I can do to:
a) Calm him down a bit/ make him less dependent on being played with 24/7
b) Stop him crying

I do feel bad about shutting him in the kitchen but if we don't he ends up breaking stuff and pouncing on us all night.

Thanks for any advice!

[SageSeymour]

I've always kept our kitten in a separate downstairs room overnight as I don't want a cat roaming the house and waking me up! So she goes in there at 10pm ish and comes out again at 7 am ish

You say he is also shut in this room when you're at work? How long are you at work for ? If it's full time then this could be you issue - he's in this room all night and also all day

[EvansOvalPiesYumYum]

If you're both at work all day and shut him in the kitchen, and then you shut him in the kitchen also at night, he's probably bored and lonely. Little wonder he's displaying fed-up tendencies. Wouldn't you, if you were being ignored? He's a baby, he needs some love and attention. May I ask why you have decided upon keeping a pet if you can't give him the love and attention he deserves?

Does he have plenty of toys and scratching posts? Kitchen is not an ideal playroom for him. Poor little fella

[EvansOvalPiesYumYum]

He needs lots of affection and cuddles.

[seraphex]

I certainly don't want him to be bored because he's in the kitchen too much :( he's in there from about midnight to 6.30 and from 9-5.30ish. He's got a lot of toys, litter tray, Scratching Post, bed and a number of blankets etc to play with. Would it be better to give him the roam of the hall stairs and landing when we're at work? Currently I only let him in the living room if he's supervised as he keeps climbing the tree, knocking it over and breaking the baubels! I'm off work for 17days from tomorrow so he will have the roam of the house in the daytime at least.

[seraphex]

We do play with him a lot. For at least an hour before work, after work and before bed.

[EvansOvalPiesYumYum]

Your bedroom would probably be better than the kitchen. Good news that you are going to be at home for the next couple of weeks. Please make sure you lavish him with attention. You will find he will be more affectionate, because he will feel loved. As I said before, he's a baby, and is probably missing the warmth of his Mum. You have to provide this instead now.

[EvansOvalPiesYumYum]

Sera - sorry, three hours or so in a 24-hr period is not very much. Also, many people play with kittens in the same boisterous way as they might play with a puppy. Cats don't like it. Not saying you are doing this, but could it be a possibility? Kittens and puppies play very differently. Your kitten will not yet be able to control his teeth and claws, as he is young. He will learn this, but if he is played with too boisterously, he will become aggressive, through fear. Just a thought

[SageSeymour]

Ah that's why then. He's just bored and cooped up. Overnight is absolutely fine but then all day again is probably driving him mad.

In a few months he will be able to have full use of the house and he will be much more settled. If he's reliably litter trained though , I'd be tempted to just let him get on with it - can you shut the doors on some rooms ?

[msrisotto]

You'll learn about the baubles....only buy unbreakable ones!

Would you consider getting him a friend?

[GoatsHaveStrangeEyes]

I have two British Shorthairs and as a breed they aren't overly affectionate anyway.

Mine both came litter trained and have had full roam of the house since day 1. Never had any incidents there. They do not like being shut away.

[seraphex]

When I say play, I mean throwing balls/ furry toys/ magic wand ticklers and actively engaging with him. He's always either asleep on one of us/ playing generally in the room with us on top of that (when he's not nibbling us). We are gentle with him and I don't believe we are being too boisterous.

When he's being naughty I try to engage him with a toy etc to take his mind of it.

We can shut all the doors in the house so I will experiment a) letting him out at work and b) letting him out at night (very optimistic about this one).

[seraphex]

@Goats Interesting. The breeder specifically said to keep her in the kitchen for a few weeks (she was kept in the bathroom at their house). I'm going to attempt giving him the run of the bedroom, hall, stairs + landing and kitchen tonight and see how that helps! I just can't let him in the living room as he goes mad at the christmas tree and he has also turned the telly off twice because he has pulled the wires out the back biting/ attacking them.

[Archangelfarchnad]

The poor little lad has a lot to deal with right now - not only is he away from his mum and siblings for the first time ever (admittedly I don't know if he was perhaps the last of the litter), but he's on his own in one room for nearly 15 hours a day. That's pretty stressful for him, I suspect. It's good that you're going to be at home over Christmas now, so he can explore under supervision and come and play with you at a time when he's feeling playful, not just because that's the time you have free in the evening.

We shut Archcat in the living room overnight precisely because we don't want to be woken at 4am by begging for food, and because if he has the run of the house he scratches the bedroom door until he gets let in. But on the other hand, I work from home and he has someone around all day, and after the initial getting-used-to-us period he can now go in and out during the daytime through his flap. He was also an adult when we got him, and was used to living alone on the streets, so far more independent than a little kitten.

Once you've got over the Christmas period and he's hopefully regained that affection, do try giving him more space in the daytime - surely he can go in the living room then. And once he's been neutered after 4 months are you going to let him out via a microchip flap? That will keep him busy bringing you little not quite dead presents.

We haven't put our tree up inside yet, but I'm dreading it, I admit. First year with a cat, and I've seen all the YouTube vids of cats creating chaos in trees. But I think it's essentially compulsory that kittens explore trees, no? Too tempting. He'll calm down in a few months.

[Costacoffeeplease]

Poor thing, (I can't quite work out if it's make or female as you use both 'he' and 'she' in your post ) it needs way more attention and company, did you do any research before getting this kitten?

[Costacoffeeplease]

Have checked the op and see he's a male after all, still confused by the 'she' 'her' references

[Fluffycloudland77]

How old is he? The vet can neuter him from 12 weeks.

Kittens are very high needs if there's only one. I'd let him have the run of the house during the day so he can look out of all the windows & survey his new territory.

He is going to nibble you but distraction is key here (voice of bitter experience), its normal play.

[seraphex]

Thanks for the advice. He's a male cat, I may get confused as my parents had a female cat throughout my childhood and I'm still getting used to sauing 'he' not 'she'!

[timtam23]

How old is he? 9-5.30 is a long time for a young kitten to be left on their own, & only 3 hours of play/company is not much. Better to have had 2 really, then they could be company for each other. Kittens can be pretty destructive as well, Christmas trees & curtains are like magnets for them. My kitten calmed down quite a bit after being neutered but he was very high-maintenance for a few weeks (and there was usually my DH with him at home)

[cozietoesie]

Never had a kitten who didn't spend his first night (well actually the rest of his life as well) in my bed. Is that really a No No ?

[SageSeymour]

Well, only if you don't like animals in your bed! ( which I absolutely don't! ) The thought makes me shudder but I'm probably in a minority.

[AngelCauliflower]

hi, I rescued an 8 month old cat which is probably a good bit older than your cat. I let have the run of my flat (except bathroom) and it was awfully stressful for me at first but after a few months of making it clear what I didn't want her to do things are much better. She is even fine with the christmas tree, only sitting under it.

At night time she sleeps in a high up bed in the hall and then comes into my bedroom at 4am. At first she would run about the bedroom making lots of noise and being a real pain trying to wake me up. But now she sits or sleeps at the bottom of my bed until I get up at 6.30/7am. She can go and get some food out of the automatic feeder that opens around 5am and then I give her breakfast at 7am.

I have had a few things broken and I have some scratches furniture but I feel it has been worth it. I want her to feel at home here. Hopefully your kitten will settle in well to your house. You will probably see a difference in him when you spend time with him over Christmas.

[seraphex]

Thanks for all the messages, I certainly feel a bit better!

He is 14 weeks old now. He was much better with us lastnight, less violent etc and he slept for a bit on my lap which is always nice! He did however cry all night which kept us awake. He seems to cry whenever we don't play with him. I let him in the bedroom but there was no chance we could sleep as he constantly cried and pounced on us until the early hours. I eventually put him back in the kitchen where he cried incessantly. I am hopeful though as I can see progression apart from the crying (which I feel terribly about). I really hope he manages to settle down over the next two weeks off, fingers crossed!

[cozietoesie]

Maybe try taking him for an afternoon snooze - after food is usually good as long as he's used his tray - so that he learns to associate bed with cuddles and sleep and can fill up on affection. (It's a good excuse for a slob afternoon as well!)

[shaska]

The crying sounds like loneliness to me. How long did you trial him in your bedroom? The first few nights will likely be quite sleepless, because it's very exciting and novel to him, but over time he should get used to it and settle. Alternatively, you could get a large cage, eg a dog crate, and have him in that in your bedroom at night until he gets used to 'bedtime'.

The violence is pretty normal kitten stuff I think. But you do need to show him bad from good - if he gets too bitey/scratchy on your hands a 'no' and stop playing should work, over time. The cables.... let me know when you find a solution, ours have a particular fondness for apple products. He should grow out of the worst of the active damage, but do remove him from cables or them from him if you see him with one.

It does sound like he's a bit bored - what seems to you like wanting to be played with 24/7 is just because that's when you're home, so he's excited and wants attention. When you're off work I suspect you'll see him much calmer, though all cats have their crazy times - often around dawn and dusk, or at least that's when it all kicks off over here!