How to tell the DC our cat has died?

(11 Posts)
NoMoreMadCatLady Tue 20-Aug-13 14:29:21

I'm still in denial.

Vet & I, and lovely cat sitter made the difficult decision last week whilst we were away. We didn't want to spoil the DC's holiday, so said nothing at the time.

They are still so excited to be home they haven't realised he's not yet come to say hello.

They are 4,7,10 and have known him all their lives, and he was my first baby sad

I miss my little furball.

cozietoesie Tue 20-Aug-13 16:11:30

Oh I'm so sorry, OP. It's very hard with a much loved boy.

I would just tell them that she died - once they ask. There's a very good book called 'Goodbye Mog' which you might want to get hold of to let them read - the two older ones anyway. (I'd read it yourself first so that you know what they'll be getting if you give it to them.)

Catmint Tue 20-Aug-13 18:03:38

So sorry OP. xx

NoMoreMadCatLady Tue 20-Aug-13 20:21:47

Thank you.

I told them together and we talked about him & looked over old photos. I hope I didn't handle it too badly. I'll look for that Mog book tomorrow, thanks.

But now I'm feeling like an irrational cat less mad cat lady. There is another cat in my garden. His garden. In his spots. and to add to the injustice it's not even a nice looking cat, mottled, creepy & tailless. I've not seen him before, and am furious this ugly interloper is claiming our garden. If it was one of the nice neighbourhood cats I wouldn't mind so much.

I keep glimpsing movement out of the corner of my eye & just for a minute think my furball is back, and then see this horror.

Sparklingbrook Tue 20-Aug-13 20:26:23

Sorry to hear this NoMore. Exactly the same happened to us a few years ago. My Dad and the vet had to make the decision while we were on holiday.
The boys were older and knew what was happening but horrible still.

They asked if we could have a memorial to her in the garden so we got this who sits in Midnight's spot to this day. I find it comforting, even though we now have another cat.

cozietoesie Tue 20-Aug-13 20:34:08

Maybe Mr Ugly has no home, NoMore ? I think that if you read Goodbye Mog, you'll feel more kindly towards him.

timtam23 Tue 20-Aug-13 22:00:24

So sorry NoMore

Catmint Tue 20-Aug-13 22:14:12

I agree with reading Goodbye Mog. It is a lovely book, although quite difficult not to get emotional whilst reading it.

NoMoreMadCatLady Tue 20-Aug-13 22:23:09

Ok, am off to buy the book tomorrow.

And the stone garden cat is a lovely idea and will mark his territory smile

Dd (4) keeps asking if he will come back. Only recently she's been questioning the finality of death, and is very upset that he won't come back & neither will she when she dies.

I've said he's in heaven and no longer in pain, and is very happy there as there are mice to chase & worms to catch, but can't come back, no one can. DH not helpful in this explanation only, not generally as he doesn't do religion.

I've told them its ok to be sad, and I'm sad too

cozietoesie Tue 20-Aug-13 22:27:57

So very difficult - but it shows why it's best not to talk about going to sleep etc. When you have a little one who is a deep thinker, you don't want them worried about going to bed.

Ehhn Tue 20-Aug-13 22:35:08

Goodbye Mog is a beautiful book. Just be prepared to cry. A lot. I still do if I reread it.

So sorry to hear about your cat. One of our dogs was put down whilst I was away and while I know it was the right decision it can be hard when you haven't had a proper goodbye. Maybe have a little memory ceremony for him if the kids are really upset? We planted a shrub for our dog (a weigilia shrub because he wagged his tail so much).

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now