My beautiful lab is really ill.

(134 Posts)
dogsagoodun Wed 24-Jul-13 19:38:19

He's not been himself for a couple of weeks; off his food and lethargic. I just put it down to the heat. He was drinking plenty and still seemed ok.

Today he emptied his bowels all over the dining room floor and I just knew. I called DH to come.home and take him to the vets. The vet said he is a very poorly dog. He thinks hepatitis or liver cancer. He's having a scan tomorrow. He said he's going to get very poorly over the next couple of weeks and actually couldn't believe how lively he was. My brave boy.

I feel so sad and scared.

ChocolateBiscuitCake Wed 24-Jul-13 19:53:47

how completely heartbreaking - you poor thing and your poor dog. Sending you a big hug

Madondogs Wed 24-Jul-13 20:23:22

So sorry. Wishing good luck to you both, another hug from me.

RandomMess Wed 24-Jul-13 20:25:26

So very sad to read this, good luck.

Happiestinwellybobs Wed 24-Jul-13 20:26:55

Oh so sad sad Sending you a huge hug. And a huge doggie hug to your brave boy too x

dogsagoodun Wed 24-Jul-13 21:42:27

Thank you for your kind words everyone. He's only seven so this is a bit of a shock. Hope to God he's going to be ok.

Think he's rather enjoying (milking) all the extra cuddles tonight!

MrsWolowitz Wed 24-Jul-13 22:02:49

sad

Thinking of you x

momnipotent Wed 24-Jul-13 22:08:06

sad

Sending hugs to you both.

mumofthemonsters808 Wed 24-Jul-13 22:14:35

Oh no, we have a black lab who is 7 and I'd be devastated if he was poorly. He is in good hands and receiving medical treatment, so fingers crossed he will be ok, poor boy. Thinking of you

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Wed 24-Jul-13 22:19:14

So sorry you're going through this. My boy is nine and so far we've been lucky. I really hope your boy is ok. Please come back and let us know how it goes. Fingers crossed for you.

dogsagoodun Wed 24-Jul-13 22:34:20

It's rubbish. DH is so upset. I've never seen him look so sad.

Thank you again for your thoughts. I'll update later on tomorrow once we get his scan results.

1MitchellMum Thu 25-Jul-13 17:48:30

Thinking of you, horrible time. Guess you're still waiting for news? Big hugs. x

dogsagoodun Thu 25-Jul-13 18:03:24

The scan was inconclusive as he had food in tummy. There was a misunderstanding about when he should have remained nil by mouth from. Think DH got it wrong to be honest but I've not said anything because he's upset enough.

So, he's got to go in again tomorrow. More waiting. Poor boy. He is now sporting a rather attractive bald patch.

Happiestinwellybobs Thu 25-Jul-13 19:25:48

Fingers crossed for tomorrow x

SallyBear Thu 25-Jul-13 23:59:15

Poor boy. That's so sad. hmm

1MitchellMum Fri 26-Jul-13 06:50:16

Aww that's awful ... good for you for not getting upset with DH. Thinking of you today.

Frettchen Fri 26-Jul-13 17:01:15

Poor pup, and poor you. Hope the scan today went well and that there's something you can do for your boy.

dogsagoodun Fri 26-Jul-13 19:43:55

He's got hepatitis but the vet said it's the worst case he has ever seen. He's got a truck load of medicine. He's had a shot of.vitamin k today and he has got to have another tomorrow. The vet is going to reassess tomorrow and if he's not happy he is going to book him into the animal hospital.

There is a very real possibility that he won't make it through the next five days. He's a very sick dog. But, if he can get through the next few days we may be able to save him.

It's all such a lot to take in. We're still processing it all and working out logistics for his 24 hour care.

Thanks for your support. I'll update when I know more.

All the best flowers

Thinking of you and wishing your boy strength x

bassetfeet Fri 26-Jul-13 20:37:28

Thinking of you also here. Strength and calm for your lovely dog flowers

Thinking of you all. One of my previous labs had cirrhosis and I know how terrible it can be.

Wishing you all luck. flowers

Happiestinwellybobs Fri 26-Jul-13 21:20:04

Thinking of you all, and sending you and your beautiful boy strength to get through the next few days x

1MitchellMum Fri 26-Jul-13 21:40:42

Poor dog - and poor you. But on the positive side you now have a diagnosis, the medication - and the love and will to make him better. I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you all. x

everlong Sat 27-Jul-13 02:05:47

Keeping everything crossed for him OP.

Oh no, your poor doggy. We have a choc lab and he is beautiful, they are such lovely dogs.
But how on earth did he get hepatitis? Do they know?
Fingers toes and ears crossed that they make him better!

SallyBear Sat 27-Jul-13 06:29:55

Hepatitis is a term for the inflammation of the liver. I suspect that OP's lab has Hep. A as that is usually contracted through consumption of dirty water that's been contaminated with faeces. You can't stop them eating or drinking something when you're out and about. Poor thing I hope that he makes a full recovery.

dogsagoodun Sat 27-Jul-13 17:53:19

He's taken a turn for the worse. The vet said the next 24 hours are crucial. I think we're going to lose him. My handsome, funny, kind boy. We are praying for a miracle.

everlong Sat 27-Jul-13 17:56:45

I'm so sorry to read this.
Keeping him in my thoughts OP.

ratbagcatbag Sat 27-Jul-13 17:58:49

So sorry, fingers crossed for you. sad

outtolunchagain Sat 27-Jul-13 18:00:39

Oh dear so sorry , thinking of you and your handsome boy

coffeeinbed Sat 27-Jul-13 18:01:07

Hope he'll pull through.
Poor doggie.

I have just seen this thread, and I am hoping that you have better news soon. Over the years, we have lost three cats, two to diseases of old age, and one to suspected poisoning, and each time it broke my heart, so,I know how much you are worrying now, and I am sending your lovely lab lots of good, healing thoughts.

We have two dogs (a chocolate lab, a black lab pointer cross) and a cat now, and I know how tightly they wind their paws round your heart. Please give him a cuddle from me, and my two dogs send you and himself a lick each.

dogsagoodun Sat 27-Jul-13 18:21:30

Thank you. Charlie is a chocolate lab and a nicer dog you couldn't wish to meet. I can't imagine life without.him. God, I am willing him to pull through.

1MitchellMum Sat 27-Jul-13 18:29:59

Bless him, fingers crossed still.

Oh dogs how awful sad I will join in willing him through, you can do this Charlie xxx

I hope he makes it I really do how sad sad x

alicetrefusis Sat 27-Jul-13 18:49:21

Oh am so sorry sad licks, wags and purrs of hope and comfort from all in the Trefusis household. x

Happiestinwellybobs Sat 27-Jul-13 18:57:23

Love, strength and positive vibes from me and very special doggie licks from Max, our black Labrador for Charlie. I can't imagine what you're going through and hope a miracle happens for you flowers

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Sat 27-Jul-13 19:04:27

Thinking of you. All fingers crossed. sad

MissStrawberry Sat 27-Jul-13 19:12:21

Thinking of you too.

Hoping for a miracle.

Still thinking of you and Charlie. Love and pigs ears from SconeDog and SmallerSconeDog (both black labs).

TakingTheStairs Sat 27-Jul-13 19:16:17

dogs I'm so sorry. Hoping Charlie pulls through
X

momnipotent Sat 27-Jul-13 19:18:22

Fingers crossed for your lovely boy.

I lost my old boy three weeks ago, I wouldn't wish that pain on anyone. sad

FlatCapAndAWhippet Sat 27-Jul-13 19:19:56

Come on Charlie fella. xxxx

LegoAcupuncture Sat 27-Jul-13 19:21:44

Willing Charlie to get better.

out2lunch Sat 27-Jul-13 19:25:08

wishing Charlie all the best xxx

tibni Sat 27-Jul-13 20:27:20

Thinking and wishing Charlie the very best, I have a very blonde lab, great dogs.

topbannana Sat 27-Jul-13 20:34:39

Fingers crossed for Charlie from the depths of Dorset xx

topknob Sat 27-Jul-13 20:36:12

Fingers crossed for you xxx

ModreB Sat 27-Jul-13 20:41:02

How old is he? We have a Choco Lab who did this recently. It turned out he swallowed a sock and it triggered an epileptic fit, which was the reason for the D&V.

rubyredbeau Sat 27-Jul-13 20:45:37

I had two chocolate labs until recently when we lost one to liver issues (she was 18 months after chemo for cancer). Still don't think I am over it, she was my first ever dog. Sorry point was sending you and Charlie support, they are the most amazing dogs and can bounce back !

dogsagoodun Sat 27-Jul-13 21:11:23

He's gone. We are devastated. My beautiful, beautiful boy. I am going to miss him so much. This feels so cruel.

How do I tell the children. They're sleeping now. I can't stand the thought that they've got to wake up to this tomorrow.

Thank you so much every one of you for willing my boy on.

To Charlie, the best dog that ever lived. We will always love you!

ratbagcatbag Sat 27-Jul-13 21:14:33

Run free at rainbow bridge Charlie.

Massive hugs to you and your family. Xx

everlong Sat 27-Jul-13 21:16:18

I'm so so sad to read this. So unfair.

Run free Charlie dog.

Biggest hugs for your lovely mum x

eurozammo Sat 27-Jul-13 21:19:06

Oh, so sad. We had a yellow lab when I was a teen. Rescue dog, and so lovely. I'm so sorry that Charlie has gone.

Oh no sad

Sweet dreams Charlie xx

He won't forget you dogs. Animals never forget those who showed them love. He will be with you in your heart always.xx

rubyredbeau Sat 27-Jul-13 21:22:01

Oh no my heart goes out to you! Telling the kids isn't great my ds(9) took it badly but dd(5) was ok. I wish you all well and hope you get through this together!

starfishmummy Sat 27-Jul-13 21:23:54

((((hugs))))

Fishandjam Sat 27-Jul-13 21:25:17

I am so sorry. Much love to you and your family.

outtolunchagain Sat 27-Jul-13 21:31:22

So sorry , I am welling up and I don't even know you or your lovely Charlie ,but I know how I would feel if it were our dog, they just get into your heart .

You gave him a wonderful life and he loved you as much as you him, and you must hang on to that.

Happiestinwellybobs Sat 27-Jul-13 21:39:07

I am so sorry for you all. Charlie will be running free at Rainbow Bridge. And he will know how much he was loved by you x

peachactiviaminge Sat 27-Jul-13 21:44:40

Run free sweet boy. He has the same name as our boy and I've this huge lump in my throat both for you and yours and the idea of going through this one day with our old boy. They're never with us long enough. Be kind to yourselves and remember your wonderful boy with only joy and love. xx

So, so sorry to hear this. {{{hugs}}}

bassetfeet Sat 27-Jul-13 21:45:42

So sorry to read this news. The love you gave Charlie shines through your words. And he will have had a lovely life with you .

Run free Charlie . x

coffeeinbed Sat 27-Jul-13 21:46:55

Oh no.
So sorry!

tibni Sat 27-Jul-13 21:55:11

so sorry. sad

thechildrensparkle Sat 27-Jul-13 22:05:24

Oh lovely. I lost my dog when I was about 12 and my mum wouldn't have another because the grief for a dog just wasn't worth it. It took me years to get over it. For the DC get another puppy as soon as you can bear it. I know you can't replace Charlie but they will need a new dog to transfer their love to and help to forget their grief.

LegoAcupuncture Sat 27-Jul-13 22:06:44

So so sorry.

Oh no. I am so so sorry. Run free Charlie, free from pain.

Love and hugs to you all. The dc will be ok, they loved him and that will help. Love never dies after all, it just gets kept inside of us all. Xxx

RosieLig Sat 27-Jul-13 22:16:18

That's so sad- I'm so sorry. He sounds like a lovely special dog.

SallyBear Sat 27-Jul-13 22:19:50

Dogsagudun - Charlie is running in a field with my SallyBear. Two Labradors having the most fun. My heartfelt sorrow at your sad news.

HoneyDragon Sat 27-Jul-13 22:23:05

Dogsagudun - I'm so sorry sad I followed this thread hoping so badly for a good outcome.
Grieve together with the children, ds was away on a school trip when we lost our lab last year. It broke my heart waiting to tell him, but at least we could then grieve together.

MissMarplesBloomers Sat 27-Jul-13 22:24:13

We had a choccy lab until 2 yrs ago...I still miss the daft bugger they are special boys.

Biggest hugs to you all x

MissStrawberry Sat 27-Jul-13 22:29:20

I am so sorry for your loss.

RIP Charlie.

dogsagoodun Sat 27-Jul-13 22:34:53

Thank you all so much. The tears are flowing.

It really helps to have your support and kind words. I.can't believe I'll never see him.again. It's going to be very quiet in our house, even with three children.

I loved him so much.

Thank you all and sorry to all of you who have.also been through this.

Ilovemydogandmydoglovesme Sat 27-Jul-13 23:43:29

I'm so sorry for you. Can't imagine how you feel. Am dreading that day.

How old are your dc's? There's a brilliant children's book called Up In Heaven that really helped my dc's when their Nanny died and also helped my friend when she lost her chocolate lab. It'll have you in tears, I can't read it even now without weeping but it's lovely and it really helps small children.

God I'm so sorry. Sending you a big hug.

babysaurus Sat 27-Jul-13 23:47:55

You poor darling! My beautiful cat was PTS yesterday after liver problems (its been a very harrowing week!) and it just feels so heart wrenchingly awful doesn't it? The only thing I can say is that it will ease eventually but in the meantime, cry - don't bottle it up!
My thoughts are with you xxx

punter Sun 28-Jul-13 07:55:31

So sorry for your loss, must have been such a shock to have things happen so quickly. Hugs.

1MitchellMum Sun 28-Jul-13 07:57:42

I'm so sorry. I lost a dog to liver cancer, it came on very quickly. Know just how you feel. You did all you could do. RIP lovely boy. x

toomuch2young Sun 28-Jul-13 08:02:37

I am so so sorry for your loss. Charlie sounds a beautiful special boy and he will live in your heart and memories forever. Am all choked up reading this. Sending hugs to you and your family.
When my cat died, after about a month I made a photo album of all his pictures and that really helped to remember the lovely times and his beautiful nature. Dread anything happening to the dogs.
Grief is the price we pay for love. Take care x

momnipotent Sun 28-Jul-13 11:39:23

I am so so sorry to hear this. I lost my old boy three weeks ago to cancer - bastard disease, how DARE you take my dog! - and still struggling. I know it just requires time. I keep telling myself that he is only physically gone, but he is still my dog, he is always with me in my mind and in my heart. That helps sometimes. He had always been here since before the kids were born but they handled it very well much better than me. Kids are remarkably resilient.

Thoughts with you today.

FlatCapAndAWhippet Sun 28-Jul-13 15:59:33

Oh no sad I'm so sorry he's gone, I feel so sad for you. I know only too well how devastating this is, sending you our love from the Peak District. xx

cocolepew Sun 28-Jul-13 16:06:01

I'm so sorry, how sad for you all.
I'm sorry about your cat too, babysaurus.

out2lunch Sun 28-Jul-13 17:33:28

so sad xx rest in peace Charlie xx

topbannana Sun 28-Jul-13 18:40:57

So sorry to hear this, my heart goes out to you and your family. And to echo a PP, the grief did not really start to lessen beyond the initial shock until we got our DPup.
As hard as it will seem now, the love and laughter a puppy or rescue will bring can help your family move on. Bizarrely since we had our puppy we talk about BlackDog so much more (almost on a daily basis) so she is most definitely not forgotten.
Big hugs to you and your family thanks

babysaurus Sun 28-Jul-13 19:34:20

Thank you Cocolepew x

Re getting another dog at some point, someone

babysaurus Sun 28-Jul-13 19:37:34

Sorry pressed post accidentally.

Re getting another dog, or cat, at some point someone once described it as the biggest compliment you can give to the (furry) member of your family who passed away.

I hope you're faring okay, considering. Bloody hard as it is!

toomuch 'grief is the price we pay for love' - how very true!

momnipotent Sun 28-Jul-13 21:28:05

I am not sure if this is helpful, it is a poem that pops up regularly on my FB from various dog rescues:

A Dog’s Last Will & Testament

Before humans die, they write their last will and testament, giving their home and all they have to those they leave behind. If, with my paws, I could do the same, this is what I’d ask…

To a poor and lonely stray I’d give my happy home; my bowl and cozy bed, soft pillow and all my toys; the lap, which I loved so much; the hand that stroked my fur; and the sweet voice that spoke my name.

I’d will to the sad, scared shelter dog the place I had in my human’s loving heart, of which there seemed no bounds.

So, when I die, please do not say, “I will never have a pet again, for the loss and the pain is more than I can stand.”

Instead, go find an unloved dog, one whose life has held no joy or hope, and give my place to him.

This is the only thing I can give…

The love I left behind.

dogsagoodun Sun 28-Jul-13 22:46:47

Such lovely words. We've had this conversation tonight. I'm just not sure. I think we need to recover from the shock first. Then, maybe...

Does anyone have any ideas how to help my five year old. He's struggling. I've suggested we make a scrapbook of all our favourite memories of him and he liked that idea. Anything else I can do?

This is tough. We've laughed a lot more this evening though, recounting tales of his mischief!

When we lost our cat, I bought my dd a cuddly toy of a cat the same colour and we named it after her.

Is that something you think your Ds would like. Something to remind him of Charlie so he doesn't have to worry about forgetting him. He can talk to him too and remember all the happy times when he snuggles up with it at night.

cq Sun 28-Jul-13 22:57:46

So hard to know what to do, but this helped us:

Have a little memorial service. Things like that help the children to 'do' something about the sad situation you are all in.

Can you bring him home to bury him? Not always possible, esp if you're in a rented house. If not, perhaps bury his collar or something of his. Plant a tree or shrub for him in your garden.

Don't rush to put away his bed etc - the empty space may feel worse than being reminded of him when you see his bed.

Just do whatever feels right.

So sad for you all.

dogsagoodun Sun 28-Jul-13 22:58:44

That's a really lovely idea. I think he'd love that. Thank you. I'll have a look tomorrow.

SallyBear Sun 28-Jul-13 22:58:58

Dogsagoodun we had the same issue recently with DS3 who is 7. It's taken him about a month to get over Sally's death. Lots of tears. Generally at bedtime while he was thinking about things. After a week of this, I told him that we would get a new puppy. We looked at photos and selected a breeder. DH and I went to see them, took photos, he still cried. Last week we buried her ashes and planted a tree. He helped put the ashes into the hole, crying hard. This week we took him to the breeder and he helped choose and name a puppy. We are getting the puppy in a month. He now has a photo of himself holding the puppy by his bed. I think that we needed to go through the whole process with him, to help him come to terms with our old girl's death. He is really looking forward to Toby arriving now.

dogsagoodun Sun 28-Jul-13 23:00:11

Both lovely ideas. We are bringing his ashes home but still don't know where to scatter them.

SallyBear Sun 28-Jul-13 23:02:03

Dogs, I couldn't scatter her ashes. It just didn't seem right. Planting a tree over her ashes felt as if she was finally home after being away.

dogsagoodun Sun 28-Jul-13 23:06:51

Sally Bear, I think burying them is a better idea. Did you do it at home? The reason I can't decide is what happens if we move house? It's likely that we will at some point although not for a while.

SallyBear Sun 28-Jul-13 23:09:12

The way I looked at it was that if we ever did move, Sally would be leaving a lasting legacy in the shape of a beautiful variegated leafed Norwegian Acer, providing both shape and beauty with dappled shade in the garden.

MissAntithetic Sun 28-Jul-13 23:10:46

I feel your pain. I lost my dog in December and although the dog hair is slowly diminishing I don't think the hole in my heart ever will.

It's never long enough is it.

I'm not ready for another dog, selfish as I may feel I just can't go through that again right now but in time I hope I can. A dog brings much more than muddy paws to your life.

MissAntithetic Sun 28-Jul-13 23:12:01

I have my dogs ashes in a little urn with his name on. I couldn't bring myself to scatter them and I intend on moving so burying wasn't an option. They are on the sideboard above his most favourite place to lay.

momnipotent Mon 29-Jul-13 01:38:03

I didn't ask for my old boy's ashes because to me that wasn't him, he was the big fluffy lump on the floor and that is how I want to remember him. His collar hangs in my office. It's where both of us spent most of our days so instead of looking over at him I now look over at his collar. In his memory I plan on buying a large ornament for the garden that can easily be moved when/if we leave this house. I don't actually know what it will be yet, but I will know it when I see it.

The vet sent me flowers on the day he died and I had them in a vase in the house and they lasted almost 2 weeks. I couldn't bring myself to put them into the green bin that gets picked up by the town though so I put them in the composter in our garden so that that final part of him is always here. Which is silly because the flowers came after he was already gone.

Immediately after he died I was all gung ho to get another dog right away. My lovely boy was actually the second dog we lost in one week, the first was our foster dog that we had had for 6 months (he didn't die, he was just moved to another province because of BSL). That was truly the most awful week I have ever had. We were going away the next week and my plan was to get another dog as soon as we got back. I'm glad that the desperation for another dog passed while I was away and now I have time to think. Instead of getting another dog I started volunteering as a dog walker at the local shelter. I know we will get another dog eventually but I want it to be an unloved and unwanted dog that I can 'save'. I'm not sure, but right now there is an 8 year old lab mix at our local shelter. She came from a horrible situation and she is very scared and timid, she is also older and she is black - three things that will make it difficult to get her adopted. I am going to wait a couple of more weeks but if nobody else takes her I think I might. I know she would only be with us for a couple of years and then I'd be like this again, but to me this is the best way to honour my boy. Cute puppies are easy to adopt out, but I think this girl might need me more.

babysaurus Mon 29-Jul-13 14:37:07

M

babysaurus Mon 29-Jul-13 14:39:37

Argh! iPhone keeps making the keypad vanish so I end up pressing 'post' instead.

Volunteering instead of taking the plunge and getting another dog is a fantastic idea. And I bet it also means you end up with another dog sooner than you thought too wink

OP good luck with your LO

IfUSeekAmy Mon 29-Jul-13 14:50:16

I'm so so sorry that Charlie didn't make it. It's so sad. My dog has appt today at 3.45 to be pts. She is nearly 16 and she's given up, she can't stand up, she won't eat or drink. It's breaking my heart even though I know it's the right thing to do. Maybe they will meet each other up there and have a play x

SallyBear Mon 29-Jul-13 15:29:17

Amy it is the right thing to do. Sorry for the loss of your furry companion and family member.

momnipotent Mon 29-Jul-13 15:40:14

So sorry Amy. It is definitely the right thing to do for her, much harder for you. I am sorry for your loss.

Oh amy so sorry to hear about your dog as well.

How lucky though that all of you had such wonderful dogs who have enriched your lives so much. An animal makes the home complete and even when the worst happens you have memories of times you were truly happy and you never forget that love you shared with them.

I'm sure they will be happy and playing and be waiting for the day many many years from now when you will join them.

IfUSeekAmy Mon 29-Jul-13 18:29:09

Thank you for your lovely words. At least I've had time to prepare knowing she was going, poor dogs didn't get that. I still have my other dog a black lab, feels strange only having one dog now

I hope your other dog doesn't pine too much sad

As sad as these threads are, it's always so lovely to see how much people love their pets and how they were truly part of the family x

Big hugs to you dogs and amy

dogsagoodun Mon 29-Jul-13 18:46:01

Amy, I'm so sorry to hear this. It is so, so hard to accept they're gone. My heart goes out to you and your family. It truly is a horrible time. You are in my thoughts tonight and to your lovely dog, have fun with my Charlie.

NEScribe Mon 29-Jul-13 18:58:55

So sorry to hear about Charlie sad We have always had dogs and it is so hard to lose them - it's a year this week since we lost our beloved Gscross, Smudge and I could still easily sit and cry. He was such an amazing boy- just like Timmy, Simba, Ben and Rex who went before him.
You can't hope to replace him but we have found that getting another actually helps to keep their memory alive. Walking our rescue collie cross, we will remember how she played with him etc. we got mollie to kerp him company but they had only a short time together before he died. I found it so hard that if we hadn't already saved mollie from the pound, I might not have been able to face getting another dog. She had been abused and was reallybnervous but she has now blossomed and is a great comfort. Last month, we took a terrified GS pup from a pound and she and mollie are already firm friends. Watching them play makes us laugh - which is good - and they enrich our lives. If possible, give a home to a stray - if you only want a pure bred then there are rescue societies online for most breeds. Losing a dog is hard but you know you gave them a good life and there are so many others out there needing a loving home.

AwsomeMrsFox Mon 29-Jul-13 21:39:59

I'm so sorry dogsagoodun. We lost our lab a couple of years ago when DS was 5 and he was very upset. There is a lovely book called 'Heaven' by Emma Chichester Clark which he seemed to relate to and he asked to have a special picture of AwesomeDog2 in his room. We scattered the ashes along one of our favourite walks so we can visit anytime we want. 2 years on we have another dog who he adores but he still remembers AwesomeDog2 fondly, actually he had written a lovely piece of school work a couple of weeks ago titled 'a good memory' which was about AD2.

ToomuchIsBackOnBootcamp Mon 29-Jul-13 23:02:40

I am so sorry for you OP and all who have suffered losses. We took on an 8 year old black lab as our first family dog and I do know the day will come, but I hope we have made his last home a happy one. I am crying here reading about Charlie and hoping he is having fun i doggie heaven, and my boy knows I am upset and has come and stuck his nose under my arm to cuddle. They are wonderful creatures and I do hope OP that memories give you comfort and you give your love to a new dog in time.

IfUSeekAmy Tue 30-Jul-13 10:34:46

How are you today dogs? I hardly slept last night, I feel like a part of me has died now my dog has gone. I've had herbs

dogsagoodun Tue 30-Jul-13 10:36:06

Thanks too much. I miss that little nudge with his nose which meant cuddle me! They're such sensitive, beautiful animals. We feel blessed to have had him in our lives. He enriched us all and we are better people because of him. Our legacy to Charlie will be to live our lives to the full.

dogsagoodun Tue 30-Jul-13 10:37:39

Struggling Amy, to be honest. Hope you can find some strength today.

IfUSeekAmy Tue 30-Jul-13 10:39:12

How are you today dogs? I hardly slept last night, I feel like a part of me has died now my dog has gone. I've had her since I was 17 and she was 7 when my first DD was born and had never been around babies or children much but she was so good with all of my children. I washed her collar earlier and I've hung it up so I can see it every time I go in the kitchen. Thinking of Charlie and you dogs

IfUSeekAmy Tue 30-Jul-13 10:39:39

Herbs? Sorry, I'm crying so much I can't write!

dogsagoodun Tue 30-Jul-13 10:48:37

Oh Amy, I know. It's just utterly shit. I'll hang around this thread so we can support each other.

SallyBear Tue 30-Jul-13 11:45:43

It hits you at weird times. I was like that for ages, but since we did the tree planting in the garden over Sally's ashes its lessened the hurt and grief.

momnipotent Tue 30-Jul-13 12:10:53

I find I am obsessed with reliving the last few days of his life every week. Every Saturday morning I remember how I took him down to the lake the Saturday before he died. Every Sunday how he wanted to go to the dog park the Sunday before he died and he knew the way there so off we went. Every Monday I remember that the Monday of that week was the last good day he had with us. Every Tuesday I relive him lying on his mat and refusing all food and not able to get up. Every Tuesday night I remember that in spite of how weak he was he still managed to struggle in to sleep with me that night. Every Wednesday i relive the last trip to the vet. sad

It is harder for me now (three weeks on) than it was at the time. We had had the cancer diagnosis for a month when he died, in that month I had run myself ragged trying to do something for him. Surgery and chemo were not options so I changed his diet and made all his food from scratch, he got a separate walk from all the other dogs so that he could just go at whatever pace he chose, and I had all kinds of supplements to try and prolong the inevitable. I would be stressed everytime I left the house- if he was with me I would be worried a tumour would rupture while we were walking and there would be a crisis in the middle of nowhere and if he wasn't with me I would worry that something would happen while I was gone. The only time I could almost relax was when I was working in the office and he was there and I could see for myself that he was still with me. He went off his food the week before he died so then every mealtime became a struggle to try and get something into him.

After all that my initial feeling on that last day was mosty relief that I didn't need to worry about him anymore. I was very sad of course but I had also known it was coming so it wasn't unexpected and I had already cried a lot in that month. I find it is much harder now, the relief is gone and all that is left is sadness.

IfUSeekAmy Tue 30-Jul-13 14:03:27

Sorry for your loss too mom The verse you posted was so lovely, it makes me cry so much when I read it. I sent it to my mum too and she said the same. I keep thinking the same as you, that Sunday morning she was walking around the garden and then we went out for an hour came home and she had messed all over her bed and she couldn't stand up when I washed her. And I keep looking at the clock today thinking she was still here this time yesterday. Took my other dog to the park just now but he's so quiet today and the kids are so matter of fact about it and just say 'has Barni died now?' And that sets me off again. Hugs to you

dogsagoodun Tue 30-Jul-13 20:35:25

I'm struggling tonight. DH is away with work and it's the first time I've been home alone without Charlie here. He always made me feel safe.

This pain is awful. I forget momentarily and then I remember and hits like a lead weight in the pit of my stomach. I can't talk about him without crying. I can't get on with daily life even though I have to.

He's being forgotten too quickly by people who don't really get it.
I feel guilt that I could have done more.

I would give anything for one last cuddle right now.

momnipotent Tue 30-Jul-13 21:01:26

sad

It is so terribly hard, and made harder because most people don't get it and can't understand because he was "just" a dog.

It didn't sound to me like you could have done more but I do understand that guilt, I also beat myself up over "could have done more" when there was literally nothing more I could have done. If there had been anything I know I would have mortgaged the house to do it, but there was nothing. From what you've said it sounds like there is nothing else you could have done either.

Have a good cry tonight and know that it will become more manageable in time. It won't mean you have forgotten him but that you have learned to live with the loss.

I am sending you a bug hug.

momnipotent Tue 30-Jul-13 21:07:51

*big hug! Don't want to be sending any bugs anywhere.

dogsagoodun Tue 30-Jul-13 21:52:14

Thanks momnipotent. You're right, there's nothing more we could have done. Off to hopefully get some sleep now. You take care.

Byebyebucket Tue 30-Jul-13 23:21:37
Byebyebucket Tue 30-Jul-13 23:23:38

Hope link just posted works ....
Thought it may be something that will complement the scrap book memory idea already mentioned on the thread x x x

IfUSeekAmy Thu 01-Aug-13 11:05:20

How are you now *d

IfUSeekAmy Thu 01-Aug-13 11:05:32

Stupid phone *d

IfUSeekAmy Thu 01-Aug-13 11:06:01

How are you feeling dogs?

IfUSeekAmy Thu 01-Aug-13 11:12:22

I've got one of my mums dogs to stay, a Labradoodle, and my Labrador seems so much brighter with her here. I feel so guilty that I didn't go to the vet now with Barni, I couldn't face it but now I feel selfish and I put myself above what was the right thing to do and I left her to die alone in an unfamiliar place with people she didn't know. I cried so much last night thinking about what I've done and apologising to her in my head. I wish I was stronger and I just took her myself and stayed with her. Hope you are coping better than me at the moment.

dogsagoodun Thu 01-Aug-13 11:46:45

Struggling too Amy. Don't feel bad. I feel bad about so many things but ultimately I've got to hold onto the fact that he had a great life with us. He was loved and he knew it. Try to hold on to the good memories. Be kind to yourself. It's truly horrible, but we will get there one day at a time. Pm me if you want to..

Thinking of you.

momnipotent Thu 01-Aug-13 12:12:48

Hugs to both of you. Three weeks yesterday since my old boy went and I KNOW he had a good life with us but still feel randomly guilty over various things. It sucks. sad

IfUSeekAmy Wed 14-Aug-13 10:02:44

Hi dogs and mom, hope you are both ok. We got a new puppy on Sunday. 8wk old black lab, forgotten what hard work puppies are! Hopefully he and my older lab will be great friends and fill the void Barni has left behind. The house still feels wrong without her here and my 2yr old DD talks about her and says 'where Barni?' Which is hard but makes me happy that Barni is not forgotten even though she's not here with us.

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