will this be the beginning of the end

(54 Posts)
furbaby Tue 23-Apr-13 21:06:12

Our darling staffy who we have had since a pup has been slowing down , he is now 12 .
He seems hungry all the time after a tummy bug about a month ago .
He has lost 4 kilos in weight sad
Took him to very nice vet today who said he was anemic ..... she has done full bloods and we have an appointment tomorrow night to talk about the results .
Vet is saying he could be bleeding internally from a cancer sad
Don, t think life will ever be the same if we lost him... just can, t believe it as we have a 16 year old staffy as well and always thought she would go before him .
He is our life , he is our son and brother for our dd .
We are both gutted and worried about what tomorrow will bring , vet is talking scans after blood test but how far do you go to save your pet without it being about you and how far do you go so they don, t suffer . The whole family love this dog soooo much .

Oh I am sorry. See what happens tomorrow. It sounds like both your dogs are fab and much loved. Take care. I love our little puppy so much, it must hurt. X

furbaby Tue 23-Apr-13 21:39:37

Thank you needastrongone just praying its just anemia and not the big c . Think hubby is blaming me for booking vets as he was being head in the sand about our boy slowing down and did, nt want to be told any different .
To some he is just a dog but to us he is our life . X

moosemama Wed 24-Apr-13 11:00:18

So sorry to hear this. Your dogs sound very loved.

Just wanted to say good luck for the appointment today.

Both my dogs are very ill at the moment and it's just horrible. My old girl is going in for xrays tomorrow morning. We pretty much know what the results will be and I am dreading it . We are going through the same thing with trying to decide what to do and make sure our choices are about her and not our feelings - it's so hard. sad

furbaby Wed 24-Apr-13 20:20:46

Thank you so much moosemama
I feel for you too . Its just so bloody hard is, nt it , can, t stop crying .
Today at vets went as expected , they think he has an ulcer in stomach which I thought was good and treatable but vet said dogs don, t tend to get an ulcer on own its usually connected to a tumor .
He is on 2 different tablets to calm the tum and is on fish and rice dinners but vet said he could go down hill very fast .
Wishing you so much luck tomorrow .
Please do let me know how she gets on I will be thinking of her . How old is she ?

Are they doing further tests for a tumour then furbaby? I am sorry that it wasn't good news today. Take care.

Fancy a puppy that is severely accident prone but soft as butter and friends with anyone and all dogs? He's free to a good home!!!!!

moosemama Wed 24-Apr-13 21:26:32

So sorry it wasn't better news furbaby. sad

Our girl is almost 13 and a half.

We know she has osteosarcoma in her hind leg and it's incurable. Prognosis even with amputation, radiation and chemo is only a few months. Tomorrow's xray is to check for lung mets, but she's been coughing this week, so we think we know what the answer will be. Lung mets are already there at diagnosis in over 90% of cases of osteosarcoma, but we want to know how big/bad they are to help us make quality of life choices for her, iyswim. sad They don't want to risk a general anaesthetic this time, so they're just going to give her a little sedation and I'm going to wait at the surgery for her while they do it. At least it's at 9.00 am, so I won't have to wait long to know.

She's on tramadol and anti-inflammatories and they seem to be keeping her comfortable, but she gets restless, whiny and pacey about an hour before her next dose is due.

The problem is, she is still eating well, asking to go out, bringing us her toys and coming for cuddles. She's slowed a lot and is very different than she was even back in the Autumn, but she's still her and just not the picture of a terminally ill dog that you would expect. I have never had this before, she is our sixth dog and we've always known the right time with all our others. This time it's a case of trying to choose a time that is right, but not leave it too late so that she is suffering, but the vet said she is a strong and stoic dog and could well be masking her suffering in an attempt to please us - which makes it even harder. sad

We are into three weeks of this now and the longer it goes on, the harder it gets. I've spent such a lot of time crying and poor old dh had to walk out of his office today because he felt like he was going to cry.

I hope the meds and diet work and your boy is more comfortable.

furbaby Wed 24-Apr-13 22:42:46

needastrongone Thanks for offer of pup lol .
They wanted him back in on friday but thats not long enough for meds to kick in . So have made appointment for tuesday as this gives him long enough to make a come back (fingers crossed)
They will then xray or scan to see what is going on but they have said its not good idea due to age to operate and have chemo as he is such a stressy dog and will only make him unhappy and stressed . I just don, t know how far we will go in treatment , vets are great but are saying that If we go the whole hog and spend shit loads then we will won, t prolong his life by more than 6 months ..... I just don, t know whats best . Love him so much smile

furbaby Wed 24-Apr-13 22:53:30

moosemama this is such a sad time
for you , It sounds like you are both doing your very best for you darling dog .
Our boy is still eating so well , thats the hard thing is, nt it you feel if they are fighting then you have to as well .
I so wish they could live forever .
Yes our boy gets restless and whiney too and keeps licking his paws which I am sure its a sign that he, s in pain , mind you he is on his back snoring and farting at mo so all seems ok at mo , if only !

furbaby Thu 25-Apr-13 10:22:06

moosemama how did xray go ? Been thinking about your darling girl sad

moosemama Thu 25-Apr-13 16:05:25

When we arrived the vet felt the leg felt unstable, which it hadn't when we last saw her on Monday.

Xray showed lots of lung mets and that she'd sustained a pathological fracture to her bad leg. It would only have taken a slight knock or twist with her bone as badly damaged as it was by the tumour.

The vet kept her sedated with pain relief and Dh came straight home from work. We both held her while they put her out of her pain at half past twelve this morning. sad

It's been a long hard day and our other dog has covered the kitchen in slobber through the stress of being on his own at home for the first time ever in his life. We took him for a long walk this afternoon and he's sleeping now. Think we will have to do a lot of work to get him through this. sad

Thank you for your kind thoughts. thanks

sudaname Thu 25-Apr-13 16:19:03

ahh Moosemama we do pay such a high price for loving our pets don't we?
But you and the OP and others can eventually get great comfort from knowing that you gave your pets the very best life they could have had.
You cant do anymore than that - but this comparatively short life span of theirs to ours is really heartbreaking. But they are all of course worth it.

flowers to anyone affected by a similiar situation, it is so sad.
I saw an elderly lady walk past the other day without her old spaniel (she lost her husband last year) and l made enquiries at our local shop and her dog has had to be pts. I just feel so sorry for her. Am going to try and catch her tomorrow walking past when l walk my dog whom she adores. He is 11 now too sad

pigsDOfly Thu 25-Apr-13 16:33:28

Oh furbaby, so sorry to hear this. I remember you saying on a thread about dogs sleeping in kennels outside that your dogs were like your children and shared your bed.

I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. It's horrible.

Wish you all the best.

furbaby Thu 25-Apr-13 23:03:40

moosemama my heart goes out to you, you and dh and your darling boy dog must feel lost without her sad
I am sure she is in a happy place now .
I know you did the right thing for her .
You loved her and you will never forget her .
pigsDofly thank you for support your right it is bloody horrible , am thinking of doing a bucket list for our darling boy and doing and visiting all the places he loves before we have to lose him .
He has had a restless day , does, nt seem comfortable sad dd came over and dog sat today , he seemed to enjoy that .
He has had a busy day with family dropping by tonight just to give him cuddles .
I have spent most of day near to tears sad
But my thoughts tonight are with moosemama and her family at there big loss today . flowers

furbaby Thu 25-Apr-13 23:09:51

sudaname That made me cry even more when you said about ladys dog , poor her , I imagine her dog was a great companion. Good for you wanting to catch up with her .
Maybe she could get another dog smile

sudaname Fri 26-Apr-13 15:18:48

Yes l might ask her how she feels about that as she still gets out and about every day although getting on in years. I will even offer to take her round the rescue places but l think she has some family but don't live nearby.
I felt so sad for her because l know her dog was what kept her sane when her DH passed away and a reason to get up every day etc.so now shes lost him aswell sad.
Also last week l was having a 'paper mountain' clear out and came across a heartrending appeal for a missing cat that had been posted through our door just before Xmas with a pic of the cat(gorgeous) which l kept in our hall to remind us to look out for him. So l texted the mobile no. and asked if they minded me asking but did they ever find their cat as l still always kept an eye out for him.
Well they texted back and he had been found dead sad on a nearby busy road , driver hadn't stopped / didn't realise and a man found his body and very caringly wrapped him in a blanket and took him to a local vets. So when he got the flyer he rang them and told them the bad news. They contacted the vets, this was a couple of weeks later and the vets had very kindly kept the poor cats body and wouldn't accept any payment the man had offered for doing so. The couple were able to collect him (he was in a proper little garden 'casket') bury him in their garden and told me they had planted lots of daffodils over him. The vets still would not accept any payments from the owners either.
They thanked me for caring and for looking out for him from 'the bottom of their hearts'.
I texted back and said was very sorry and hoped l hadn't opened up old wounds.
They said l hadn't as they often spoke about him anyway and it was nice to know there were such lovely caring people about - the man who found him, the vets and me looking out for him every day even though it was in vain sadly.

sudaname Fri 26-Apr-13 15:22:05

God, l'm in absolute titters now ! grin sad

furbaby Sat 27-Apr-13 20:42:54

An update on our darling boy .....
Things all looking bleak today he threw up his breakfast twice sad ate it back up each time .
He has been whiney and unsettled all day , has had tea but threw that up as well .
I look a right state my eyes are so swollen from crying all the time .
Wonder what vet will say on tuesday sad

sudaname Sat 27-Apr-13 20:55:02

Oh dear fur l am sorry. No words really but just saw your post and just wanted to let you know someone is thinking about you and moose and anyone else who is going through similar.

furbaby Sat 27-Apr-13 21:02:06

Thank you so much sudaname ... don, t think I will ever recover from this , had about 1 hours sleep last night I got up and did a 2 hour walk on my own felt so lonely without my boy sad

moosemama Sat 27-Apr-13 21:07:13

Oh furbaby, I am so sorry to hear this. I wish I could think of something to say to make you feel better. sad

furbaby Sat 27-Apr-13 21:35:43

Thank you moosemama ... he has now taken himself off up to our bed . Found another pile of sick on the stairs sad
Hows things with you ? Is your darling boy dog coping without your girl ?

moosemama Sun 28-Apr-13 13:53:27

He's very sad furbaby. Only time he's perked up is when we've taken him for his walks really.

Lurcherboy is howling whenever he's left and in the middle of the night. Dh ended up coming down and sleeping on the sofa, with the kitchen door ajar and the dog gate shut, for the first couple of nights. He didn't interact with him at all, so that he didn't reinforce the howling, but as I suspected, just knowing he wasn't on his own was enough to stop the howling and allow him to sleep.

Last night I had a brainwave and we put dd's old baby monitor in our bedroom with the parent/receiver bit in the kitchen, so he could hear us and know we were still there. I remembered we did this for a while when we first got him. Fortunately it worked and he didn't howl, pace or dribble for the first time last night. He did start to whine a little once, so I just calmly said "go to sleep" and he stopped. Not sure what to do when we have to go out without him though, might try doing the same but leaving a radio on by the monitor or something. We also tried DAP spray on his bedding last night, so that might have had something to do with him being more relaxed as well.

Dh is out mowing the lawn at the moment and it's very odd not to have our old girl barking at it the whole time. It's funny what you miss, as it used to drive dh nuts when she did that. sad

furbaby Sun 28-Apr-13 19:46:38

moosemama I am sorry to hear that he is so unsettled , mind you it has,nt been long . Fingers crossed he can get over this and enjoy being an only dog with all your attention .
Brilliant idea with baby moniter well done you smile
Not heard of DAP spray ? Sorry am I being thick .
Lets hope its onwards and upwards for all of you and you can get over your big loss . Never forgotten but I hope each day will get a tad easier .
Our boy has had a better day today smile
He has, nt been sick and has been less whiney , he had tea 2 hours ago (egg , soya milk and rice ) and he has, nt thrown it up yet . I checked his gums today and they do look more pink then when vet checked them smilesmilesmile
Also he seems to have put on a little weight , he had a ridge above his tail where his spine was showing but its flat again now smile
I am so worried that I am getting hopeful then tomorrow he, s bad again . Got vets on tuesday and hope they say he has put on weight and no longer anemic ,,,, would be so nice to have a bit longer withour darling boy smile

moosemama Sun 28-Apr-13 19:54:37

I am so glad to hear your boy is feeling a bit better today.

DAP is Dog Appeasing Pheromone. Basically a copy of the hormone mother dogs give off when their pups are little, that helps to keep them feeling contented and relaxed. It's often used to help settle pups into their new homes and can sometimes help with separation anxiety and fear of fireworks etc as well.

I will be keeping everything crossed for your boy to continue gaining weight and getting stronger.

furbaby Sun 28-Apr-13 20:21:23

DAP sounds goods , Thanks for info , that could be handy as both ours don, t like fireworks .
Not feeling so positive now as he had a good day I wanted to take him up the field , he seemed keen to have coller on but only just left garden and he stopped and would, nt walk , we came back in doors sad maybe I was just hoping too much sad

furbaby Mon 29-Apr-13 22:34:10

Mmm looks like the race to the end has started ....sad our old staffy (16) has spent last 24 hours in basket apart from wees , bloody great . I know she is slowing down but she seems to have picked up on darling boys sadness , she won, t leave her basket sad looking like we could lose both our babies sad
Hoping for some positive vibes from vet tommorrow but not holding out too much .

moosemama Tue 30-Apr-13 10:17:29

Good luck at the vets today furbaby, I will be thinking of you.

It could just be that your old girl has picked up on the general stress and sadness in the house. It's quite common for dogs to pick up on moods and changes in the daily routine and struggle to know how to handle them. Hopefully she's just a bit sad and confused at the moment, but will come round in her own time.

furbaby Tue 30-Apr-13 19:44:06

Thanks moosemama , went ok at vets but nothing positive , he has put on 100 grams which is good but he is having more meals so expected some gain .
Vet said they could scan him but it won, t tell a great deal if they find tumor they can, t do much and if they don, t he
would need GA and camera Into stomach which he is, nt strong enough for .
Poor boy hubby had to carry him into vets as he was so scared sad
Got painkillers and more tummy tablets and have to go back next tuesday .
He seems settled at mo he has had tablets and tea and seems to be keeping it all down .
Think your right about old dog picking up on sadness .
Nice that both dogs still have a very good appitite .
Hope your darling boy is well smile

moosemama Tue 30-Apr-13 20:01:56

Well, nothing positive, but nothing worse either then I suppose. Sorry it wasn't more positive though.

Good to hear he's settled, eating well and keeping it down at the moment. I'll keep on sending positive vibes.

Lurcherboy is continuing his sentry duty by the front window, but the combination of DAP spray and baby monitor seems to be helping him to settle at night. He keeps going in the garden and just standing there, like he doesn't know what to do with himself without his old friend out there with him. She was a tough old thing, still chasing her toys around right up to the end, so I think he's missing having someone to play with.

Mind you, he's not impressed with me today, because I've been ill, so he's still waiting for his walk. Dh is going to take him when the dcs are all in bed though, so he'll probably get a longer walk than if I'd managed to wobble up the road to the park with him.

He went to the vets last night for his vaccinations and was wholeheartedly unimpressed at having his kennel cough vax squirted up his nose. Unfortunately he had to have it, as he's booked into kennels for a weekend in a few weeks. It will be the first time he's been there alone, so another worry, but they are lovely, lovely people who totally spoil him so I'm sure he'll be fine. In actual fact he loves it there so much that he pulls more on the way in than he does on the way home. hmm

furbaby Fri 03-May-13 21:01:26

Poor lurcherboy he must be so confused .
Its good that you have found a way to keep him happy at night .
You must be missing your darling girl so much sad
I hope you enjoy your weekend away at least it gives you something to look forward to smile
All a bit sad here old dog is camped in her basket all the time , seems like she knows how ill our darling boy is .
Darling boy has done short walks in field for last 3 days which is great but he, s lost his spark ..... he, s like a different dog .He is in pain , not all the time but painkillers don, t seem to help much .
He has had 4 small meals today and been I kitchen banging his bowl around so guess he wants more hmm
Always hungry but throwing it back up if we give him too much sad

moosemama Fri 03-May-13 21:11:59

Hi furbaby

So sorry to hear your babies are no better and your boy is still being sick. It's so upsetting the way the atmosphere in the house changes isn't it? sad

I have finally got lurcherboy to pick up slightly. Bought one of those fling and fetch tennis ball chucking sticks and have been going in the garden to play with him lots, as it was too sad watching him just standing there not knowing what to do. He's enjoying the playing now, but still just as sorrowful when he's in the house.

I think we've decided we will get another dog, but not for a few months. I can't bear to see lurcherboy so lonely and I tend to think dogs aren't happy living in isolation from their own species, iyswim. I can't imagine living on my own with another species of animal and not being able to understand a word they say, let alone their weird behaviour and habits and that's what I imagine it's like for dogs living with humans. I suppose I feel the least we can do is make sure they have a canine companion so that they can relax and have someone they can communicate with.

furbaby Fri 03-May-13 21:38:07

Yes understand what you mean about dogs living together , they do get a lot of enjoyment out of each other .
Sadly for us when we lose ours we won, t have any more for along time as we both work , when ours were young I took them to work with me and now they are old they stay home and dd comes over during day . This would, nt suit a new dog and I am not in a job that I could take a dog with me now.
Just can, t imagine a house with no dog sad
Just don, t know what to do about darling dog , I take it he will let us know when he has had enough . When time is right we will get vet to come to house as he is so scared of vets could, nt do that to him .
When he wanted walk other day I started to kid myself that he was picking up and maybe we could get to keep him but sadly not sad

moosemama Mon 06-May-13 19:03:42

How's he doing furbaby?

furbaby Tue 07-May-13 08:51:39

Not so good moosemama sad have given up on tummy tablets as been on them weeks and made no difference .
He is cuddled up under quilt in bed with dh at mo and looks well sweet , just his head sticking out smile
I am going to cancel todays vets appointment for check up , there is no point all , it does is make him unhappy and scared .
I will go and get him some more painkillers they seem to help .
Hope your all getting stronger .

moosemama Tue 07-May-13 11:03:17

sad sorry to hear that furbaby.

I completely understand you not wanting to put him through a vet appointment, you have to do what you feel is right for him. ((hugs))

Sounds like he is being well loved and pampered though. smile

We've been keeping busy, trying to keep our mind off things. Took lurcherboy out to a VW show at the weekend and he enjoyed saying hello to dogs of all shapes and sizes. Unfortunately, he started howling at night again at the start of the weekend and I had to be firm with him, as I've tried everything else. It seemed to do the trick though and he's stopped again.

Just taken him for an hour and a half's run with lots of ball chasing to try and exhaust him, because I've been invited out to lunch and it's the first time I've left him for longer than the 10 minute school run since the day we lost oldgirl.

He was very vocal on our walk this morning. Lots of barking - in a come and play with me kind of way - whenever he saw another dog. I had to do lots of clicker reinforcement of 'quiet' to get him to stop, I think he's really missing having someone to play with. He got over it after a while and enjoyed chasing his ball though and is now spark out on the kitchen floor.

furbaby Tue 07-May-13 12:42:01

Sounds like lurcherboy is enjoying the good things in life smile bet he does miss his play companion , at least with 2 dogs in house they had each other for play , comfort and a bit of healthy competition .
Have you any more thoughts about when you are going to get another dog ?
Dh and I have today off work so darling boy has been enjoying a spot of gardening with me then late breakfast and a snooze on the decking (his favourite spot)
I love being with him but when I stroke his ear or his little crooked tail it just brings me to tears as I won, t be doing it much longer .... I know his little body so well he, s like a little bear with his big brown eyes .
Dh not coping at all sad he is drinking heavy from when he gets up , think its the only way he can get through this , at least back to work tomorrow so he won, t drink until evening smile

furbaby Sat 11-May-13 13:16:45

Things taken a turn for the worse , darling dogs tummy looks very swollen today sad
Trying to be strong but its so hard .

EasyToEatTiger Sat 11-May-13 15:43:43

Thinking of you, furbaby. Big MN hugs for you..((((((((furbaby)))))))

moosemama Sat 11-May-13 16:46:16

sad Furbaby sending lots of ((hugs)) to you and your darling boy.

furbaby Sun 12-May-13 13:02:52

Our darling boy has gone ...... vet came this morning and he was put to sleep in husbands arms on sofa .
Thank you everyone for hugs and support it means a lot to me .
Life will never be the same sad

moosemama Sun 12-May-13 14:57:14

Oh furbaby I am so very sorry for your loss. sad

I know it's no consolation, but he spent the last couple of weeks totally enveloped by your love and he will be at peace knowing how truly loved he was.

((massive hugs))

furbaby Sun 12-May-13 17:44:36

Thank you moosemama , its so hard missing him so much , worried about how gentle they are with his body . Xxx

moosemama Sun 12-May-13 17:57:15

Try not to think about that furbaby, although I know it's hard - I insisted on leaving my Wheaten Terrier's dog coat on when we had to leave her.

His body is just the bit he left behind the bit of him you loved and cared for and that loved you back so faithfully is at peace now.

EasyToEatTiger Sun 12-May-13 19:02:31

More big MN hugs...(((((((((furbaby))))))))). You have been so brave and so generous to your dog. What a lucky boy to have lived with you.

RedwingWinter Sun 12-May-13 21:34:02

I'm very sorry for your loss sad

furbaby Sun 12-May-13 22:17:48

Thank you all .
Going to have a few days off work and spend some time with our old dog . She seems confused as to where he is but enjoying cuddles on sofa with us without getting dirty looks from our darling boy , who did, nt like to share his mum and dad smile

furbaby Tue 14-May-13 19:37:54

Can, t cope with this ...... can hardly breathe miss him so much . Dh is as sad as me , was feeling brighter yesterday
but like I said the grief Is so bad I feel paniky and find it hard to breathe .
The thought of never cuddling or seeing him again is more than I can bear sad

EasyToEatTiger Tue 14-May-13 20:11:47

You poor thing. Keep breathing, whatever else you do. There are helplines for pet bereavement. I will look it up if you think it might help.

EasyToEatTiger Tue 14-May-13 20:17:29

This is from the Dogs Trust... http://www.dogstrust.org.uk/_resources/resources/factsheets09/factsheetcopingwithdeath09.pdf There are people you can talk to as well, when you are able. More hugs (((((furbaby))))))

furbaby Tue 14-May-13 20:35:00

Thank you . I will check it out , can, t go on like this , poor hubby is as upset as me .
He is such a strong person usually and never crys but he keeps breaking down saying he can, t cope anymore .
Did, nt help that we had a letter from work today (we work together) from big boss saying he was very unhappy that we had booked 3 days holiday off work at short notice and that we were letting the company down ..... sad us blubbering at work would not be a good look and its not like they could, nt manage without us (big company) .
Thank you so much for hugs smile
The family have been great but no one can bring our boy back sad

EasyToEatTiger Tue 14-May-13 21:06:30

Horrid for you, furbaby. Some people trivialise a death in the family. Well done both of you for taking leave. Don't beat yourself up! Either of you.

furbaby Tue 14-May-13 21:30:30

I downloaded dogs trust info ... thank you it helped as it described just how I am feeling now . I realise that with time I can some how learn to live without him .
Its daft as we have had weeks to prepare ourselves for loosing him but he was so special and don, t think either of us realised how hard it would be .
Boss is an arse , do hope he does, nt call us in office when we go back sad

furbaby Tue 21-May-13 20:05:20

Vets rang today to say darling boys ashes are with them ....... more upset sad don, t know if I am strong enough to face picking up our angel in a box .
Not looking forward to bill either , vets out to house on sunday and cremation costs don, t think we will get much change out of £500 .
But hey he was worth it smile

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