We've had our dog for over two years, our daughter was 7.5mo when we got him, she is now almost 3. The dog is a retired Greyhound, the rescue told us that he'd previously lived in a home with young children so he was well used to them. He may tolerate them but that's it.
He clearly doesn't like DD, he looks constantly worried whenever she is in the same room, half moon eyes, licking his lips and yawning a lot. I have tried so hard to get her to respect dogs, which she (mostly) does, she never does anything to him that she shouldn't, she never gets in his bed with him, never pulls on him anywhere and generally only strokes him when he comes over to me for a fuss. She often gives him tasty treats, bonio, bits of cooked chicken etc. But still he shows all these signs of stress around her.
Our house is small, there's no way I can separate them unless I send him upstairs. DD doesn't go to nursery or anything so is home all the time, so he'd be upstairs all day every day which is not ideal. I am constantly on edge while DD is playing a bit enthusiastically in the same room as him in case she gets too close to him. He doesn't really relax in her presence.
Recently I've been thinking that he would be much happier in a different home with no small children. I know DD won't be small forever but it seems awfully mean to keep him because one day she will be a predictable child rather than an unpredictable toddler.
Please help me see what to do for the best. Please don't flame me, we were told he was good with small children but as I witness everyday, it isn't really the case. My heart breaks at the thought of letting him go, he's helped me so much, I made a few wonderful friends, I lost a stone in the first 6 weeks of having him and I get out everyday. I just can't help but feel that he'd be so much happier elsewhere :(
If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.
The doghouse
I'm in a quandary, I don't know what to do for the best.
TheCunnyFunt · 11/05/2014 18:09
Oh Cunny, what a difficult situation for you. 
Have you tried anything that might help him to relax while you retrain him to realise that dd is no threat.
I'm using both Pet Remedy and the 'Confidence' version of these pet remedies. I was sceptical about them, but desperate enough to try anything to help Pip get over his fear of other dogs and I have to say, I have seen big improvements with the introduction of each thing.
He is generally quite an anxious lad or is it only around toddlers? If he's generally anxious you could try some Ttouch sessions and/or a Thundershirt and see if either of those bring down his stress levels.
Can you have a dog gate between kitchen and living room and let him have the kitchen as a retreat, then switch when dd goes in there? My house is also really small and the dogs have their main beds in the kitchen, with a gate across the door and have the option to choose which room to be in. Pip tends to want to be with us all no matter how raucous things are, but Lurcherboy is older, prefers the quiet life and is more likely to come and sit with me when the dcs are at school or in bed.
He detests certain dogs. I haven't yet managed to work out a connection as some dogs he'll be fine with, others he'll go bonkers at, and others he'll just have a slight grumble. They can be male or female 
he can get cross at one breed of and ignore another dog of the same breed. There doesn't seem to be a particular pattern.
I did used to gate him in the kitchen but he'd just whine and whine and whine. Sounded like nails down a chalkboard. I think it was because he could see us. He'll be quiet upstairs for hours but I don't like having to shut him upstairs, it's not healthy for him to be shut away from us all for hours at a time :(
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