Struggling to feel positive about puppy

(69 Posts)
Dogownerwithoutacluebuttrying Mon 14-Apr-14 09:29:46

My puppy is just over 9 weeks. The first two days were a total shock despite lots of research beforehand.

Then things settled and were ok but I'm having a tough time today and really struggling with it. We haven't had a single poo accident after the first night and he had done really well but then I found one on the floor by the crate which might have been in the night and dropped out of his quilt on the floor - not sure. He also did a big wee on the floor even though I'd taken him out and he'd done a small one 10 mins before.

He attacks my shoes whenever I put them on.

I feel quite negative about it all and a bit stressed. Tell me it won't always be this way. I find the toilet side of it a bit gross and sometimes it makes me feel sick. He has had soggy poos which hasn't helped.

WeeClype Mon 14-Apr-14 09:32:00

I think every new puppy owner feels like this, I know I did! I actually found my puppy harder work than a newborn.

It does get better, just give it time.

Driveway Mon 14-Apr-14 09:35:57

When does it get easier? (I want someone to come say a date slightly older than my dog.)

I'm still finding it hard at seven months OP. Sorry! Maybe I'm just not a dog person though. sad

Isthatwhatdemonsdo Mon 14-Apr-14 09:38:52

I've got an 8 week old lab. I promise it does get better. I've also got a 2 yr old Goldie and he is amazing. When pup goes for your shoes give him a toy to chew on instead.

Dogownerwithoutacluebuttrying Mon 14-Apr-14 09:42:37

Yes I'm worried I'm "just not a dog person" too tbh driveway.
There are times when he is very sweet and he is a good boy and learning but it's grim at other times.

I feel like I don't get as much time with my dc or dh either. I am being a bit of a moaner probably.

Pizdets Mon 14-Apr-14 09:49:24

Having a new puppy is so hard! DH used to get home from work and I'd ask if we could return him to the breeder - luckily DH is better at seeing the bigger picture than me! Pizpup is now just over 18 months and still mental but much better and easier to be around. A lot of it is just consistency - we do basic training but we also make sure he has to follow simple rules to make the house run well (ie no licking faces, no jumping on furniture) it all seems overwhelming at first but really pays off long term.

I'd say around 7/8 months was when he started improving, although I couldn't really see it at the time and from a year - 18 months he's really chilled out (and coped admirably with being usurped as the baby of the family by pfb) Hang in there, it does get better!

NCISaddict Mon 14-Apr-14 09:56:54

If his poos are sloppy then look at changing his food, what are you feeding him?
My pup is nearly 9 months old and a joy to have now. We set a timer to take him out every hour when he was nine weeks old, we took him out on the lead so he didn't get distracted and made sure we stayed out until he did something.
The biting our shoes we cured by a high pitched yelp as soon as he made contact with our feet and then praise and a treat the second he backed off. Lots and lots of socialisation too, if you can find a calm friendly,vaccinated older dog they are very useful.

Bowlersarm Mon 14-Apr-14 10:04:03

Puppies are hard work. When we got our lab the first few months knocked me for six. And that was after a lot of research, although I hadn't grown up with dogs so had no actual experience. In the first six months to a year, it wouldn't have bothered me if I didn't see him again tbh, as long as he was happy somewhere else.

But then it all clicked, and I got really attached to him. He's 7 now smile. I love him!

So it can work out from a less than perfect start. Although I do have friends where it hasn't worked and they have ended up rehoming their dogs, so clearly it isn't for everyone.

Whoknowswhocares Mon 14-Apr-14 10:15:12

I don't think there is an owner alive that hasn't felt a bit like you do in those early days!

I used to wait sooooooooo longingly for OH to come home so I could get a break!
I thought maybe I'd made a mistake and wasn't cut out for dogs. I was wrong. I now do 3 competitive sports with mine, plus work as a trainer!!!!!!!!!

Seriously, don't judge by the first few weeks. We ALL find them a nightmare!

Dogownerwithoutacluebuttrying Mon 14-Apr-14 10:50:12

This is helping!
As I'm not a dog person it's hard to be motivated by the long term at the moment as it's an unknown!

He seems quite smart (although not smart enough not to poop where he shouldn't today! Not his fault though)

He is on a gentle puppy food and the vet changed him to a tinned food which helped but the latter is not at all good for weight gain so is meant to be temporary. I will see if it all settles today as we had switched him back to the original food yesterday, and if it doesn't will call the vet.

Just feels a shame as for the last 5 nights he'd been fine and then he messed his crate last night. Keeping me on my toes. I will dread going down in the mornings now just in case.

NCISaddict Mon 14-Apr-14 10:54:22

Perhaps look into a complete raw food? That's what we give our Border Collie and poos are very small and none smelly. He also doesn't do as many and has never needed a poo overnight.

chocolatelime Mon 14-Apr-14 11:09:57

Your puppy is only 9 weeks old and such a young baby that it can take time for them to gain the bowel & bladder control necessary for them to be clean inside. He really cannot help it at this age, he is not being 'naughty' and from your description of being clean for so many days, I actually think he is doing very well.

It is a huge change to your life getting a new puppy and there is no doubt about it, even experienced dog owners can find it tough too. Getting into a new routine will take time. Please don't dread going down in the mornings, this is a phase that will pass.

What are you using for the puppy's bed? I have an old single duvet in a cover so that if there are any accidents it is ever so easy just to strip the cover off and wash that. In fact the whole duvet fits in my washing machine, so it really isn't any bother.

Once this 'settling in' period has passed, you will feel so much more relaxed. Do enjoy your puppy, they are only small for such a short time. Hopefully you will soon be going to puppy training classes and then you can compare notes with other new puppy owners!

Dogownerwithoutacluebuttrying Mon 14-Apr-14 11:21:59

Bedding is all washable so that's not a problem.

I know he can't help it. I think I've been thrown as he had done so well every night since the first one and then all of a sudden we were coming down to an accident in the crate and a wee on the floor almost concurrently (although he has had a couple of those a day). Lulled into a false sense of security!

He does seem quite smart as other than this morning or overnight he has done all his poops in the garden and goes back to the same spots.

We have had a fabulous trainer round for a one-on-one with us all here to hear what she said. I will look at classes next.

His second vaccination is later than normal (a new type) so we still have a few weeks before we can go for proper 'walkies'.

KEGirlOnFire Mon 14-Apr-14 11:37:31

Ahhhh it does get better I promise. I never regretted getting our puppy but DH did at first. But she was my first proper grown-up responsibility I guess whereas DH already had a cat who was his 'baby'.

My girl will be 8 this year and I am already worrying that she's getting old (watching Marley and Me last night didn't help as she's a yellow lab). We also have a boy who will be 5 in August, who we got at 6 months old. I struggled to bond with him at the beginning, I think because he was being badly treated so we took him in as opposed to 'choosing' him. But I wouldn't be without either of them now.

Just remember when it comes to walkies that (IIRC) it is only 1 minute per week old they are that you can walk them at first. This was certainly the rule with our labs anyway. They get a lot of exercise through play in the house/garden at this age so walking needs to be kept to a minimum.

Your pup is doing very well with toileting. We were lucky with our girl, not one accident in the house from the day we got her at 8 weeks old (a miracle really) but we used to take her outside before she ate, after she ate, as soon as she woke from a sleep and every half hour in between!! We used the clicker treats for toilet-training and they worked a treat ('scuse the pun).

Good luck OP!

Whoknowswhocares Mon 14-Apr-14 12:43:12

The most important thing with a new puppy's food is to make any change VERY gradually. Swapping this way and that is most likely to make your pup worse in the short term as they have a very delicate system at that age and a sudden change in food will produce the squirts almost guaranteed.
I found with mine that she got loose if she had too much food, or too big a portion at once. Stick to 4 small meals until he settles and try giving a little bit less at each meal just to see it's not an over feeding issue. The packet guides are notorious for being over generous, as the more we feed, the more they sell.
If that doesn't work, then a vet trip to rule out other nasties in a few days would be sensible. Definitely if pup seems off colour in any other way, go to the vet sooner, as they can get worse quite quickly at such a young age

Two weeks in from bringing Eric home I felt stressed and exhausted and overwhelmed even though he has been a good little dog really. He's been here seven weeks now and he is an absolute joy (and I say that even though I've had to bathe him this morning after he decided to sit in his poo before I could bag it)
It does feel really hard work in the beginning I think, now it's more fun and he's a real character who makes me grin, shock, hmm every day without fail.

punter Mon 14-Apr-14 15:32:22

It is hard work and does go on for at least 6 months until they grow up a bit. Coming on here and getting encouragement and sympathy really really helped! I could have happily left him in a field at some points except he was microchipped! Then you get the teenager phase from about 10 months .... But he is now 19 months and we are almost there, most of the time. Love him to bits.
The vet found a bug in my puppy's poos early on and he needed some medication, very common apparently.

hellymelly Mon 14-Apr-14 15:38:51

It really is hard work. Mine has just turned five months, and she only has the occasional accident now, but it took a while (mainly due to the layout of our house, plus the torrential never-ending rain when she was smaller). She has very little recall yet! I do completely adore her though, and it gets easier week by week. Your pup is so tiny, don't expect too much at this stage. It does take a long time to build a relationship with a dog, and if you haven't had a puppy before then it can be a bit of a shock.

mintymellons Mon 14-Apr-14 18:24:32

I hear you, OP! We have an almost 9 week old labradoodle. Been with us just over a week. We all wanted him and both DP and I grew up with a dog so we had some idea of what to expect, but I have been pretty overwhelmed by the demands of a very young puppy.

Our issue seems to be that he doesn't like being left alone (luckily it is school hols and we've been around most of the time) but he just howls and barks like a loon when left.

On the plus side (and somewhat confusingly, he is now doing really well at night in his crate and seems to accept when it's bedtime without a fuss - just wish he could be the same during the day!).

We're now working on leaving him for very brief spells in order to try and desensitize him but it's really hard work.

I'm sure it will get better and we love him to bits, but it had been quite a shock!

hellymelly Mon 14-Apr-14 18:43:03

Nine weeks is too small to leave alone I think.

Bowlersarm Mon 14-Apr-14 18:45:10

I used to leave my 9 week old pup to do the school run. I can't see it is any different to leaving a puppy downstairs overnight.

SteveBrucesNose Tue 15-Apr-14 05:57:18

This is just what I needed to hear, thank you.

My dogs are older adopted dogs but having some of these issues. We don't know the extent of any 'issues' they had before but I'm struggling. In a lot of ways they're well trained but I'm really glad everyone has said this about the adjustment. They've been with us 2 weeks and uk pulling my hair out on a daily basis

Daisybelleblue Tue 15-Apr-14 06:39:07

Getting them used to being on their own will save you loads of problems with SA in the future.
Just being in a different room from your pup. Is good. DoodleS seam to suffer loads with SA, so its great for them to learn from a young age they are OK on their own. IMO

mygrandchildrenrock Tue 15-Apr-14 09:04:38

Our lovely puppy is now 8 months old, we got her at the beginning of Oct half term. It seemed like I spent the whole half term out in the garden, with coats, boots and a brolly! It was cold, wet and miserable. I then spent any time inside in the dining room/kitchen in case of accidents. I resented the rest of the family for sitting in the living room in the warm with the television.
I said to my oldest son, 'remind me next October half term how awful it was this time last year'.
Now, we haven't had an accident in the house since Christmas, on the whole she is very good, we do go to puppy training classes, and we all love her dearly. She brings so much joy to us and watching her run on the beach is just wonderful. She keeps me warm snuggling up to me in the evenings and she is just a treasure.
Sorry if that sounds really sloppy, but I certainly didn't feel like that in the first few weeks/months! (Oh she had really sloppy poo for about 3 months, even though there was nothing wrong with her, just puppy poo, now lovely solid ones that are so easy to pick up)

Dogownerwithoutacluebuttrying Tue 15-Apr-14 10:08:51

Mygrand that is lovely to hear that it is easier. What kind of routine do you keep i.e. how often does she need to go to the loo and what are her overnight hours when she is put to bed and gets up?

YES to the not being able to sit in the living room thing. We keep him in the kitchen as the floor is easier to clean and we can keep an eye on him. I resent not being able to lounge on the sofa. I'm knackered from it all (ridiculous as not been up as much as with a baby! But maybe we are getting old!) and so is dh.

Minty, our trainer said to feed in the crate, send them in loads, especially if sleepy, but for short periods. We have got to the point where he will go in if sleepy no problem at night and if he's in the right mood in the day. If he's playful he barks for a few mins but then settles. Going to try leaving him for 1hr 15 today if he has been to the loo first as need to go somewhere.

So last night we had another overnight poop in the crate. I am wondering if I need to go back to getting up and taking him out in the middle of the night. He has definitely got a dodgy tummy. Reverting to the special vet food for gastro-intestinal issues as that did sort it out mid last week and then when we ran out and were told it wasn't great for weight gain we went back to his normal pup food.

Dreading going back to school and having to get ready and there on time if the dog is still messing his crate.

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