how to deal with dogs running up to me in park

[HippyHippopotamus]

Hi, I figured this was as good a place as any to get advice re dogs! I've had two incidents with dogs in the last two days and i need help on how to deal with them, especially when i've got my dcs with me. dc1 is 2.5yrs and was walking with me, holding my hand. dc2 is 5mths and in a pushchair (sometimes in a carrier).

firstly, black bulldog type dog was running round the (residential) street on its own. Came bounding over to investigate me and dcs. my instinct was to pick up dc1 and stand in front of pushchair ie between dog and my dc2. this meant i could stop the dog jumping at dc2 but we couldn't get away from the dog. Dog wouldn't leave us alone, kept jumping up so i stamped my foot. This did nothing so i roared and kicked out. It ran off straight away

second one was today. i was in the park, again with dcs and a big labrador type dog came running over to us. the owner was the length of a football pitch away. dog would not leave us alone. it was trying to jump in the pushchair with my dc2, jumping up at dc1 (who i was holding). owner was calling dog but it was completely ignoring him. again, i roared and kicked out at it. it ran off. it ran away from owner and put its paws on the shoulders of a young lad trying to play football. boy's dad pulled the dog off and gave the owner a bit of a talking to once he actually caught up with his dog

now obviously I'm fine, my dcs are fine. believe it or not i love dogs but if there's a dog i don't know, jumping up at my children the above happens. i really don't want dcs scared of dogs so how do i deal with it if it happens again?

incidentally, if a dog approaches us, seems friendly and is with its owner, i always ask if its ok for dc1 to stroke it

[3cutedarlings]

Your really dont want your Dc to be afraid of dog so you roar and kick the dog??? agreed the owners should have had better control over the dog but what gave you the right to kick them? not sure what id have dont in the first situation seeing as the dog appeared to be a stray (i wouldnt have kicked it thats for sure), but why didnt you grab hold of the second dog and wait for the owner to come and get it?. That said i personally dont think dogs that dont have a good recall should be let off in busy parks.

[DooinMeCleanin]

In the first situation you shoud have took the dog o the nearest vets to be scanned for a microchip and/or called the dog warden.

In the 2nd situation you should ahve held/played with the dog until the owners caught up.

HTH

[Ephiny]

The owners should teach the dogs better manners and recall, obviously. But I really don't think you're going to get much sympathy here if you admit to habitually kicking dogs that run up to 'investigate' you.

How would you feel if your child ran up to someone in public, ignoring your instructions not to do so (children, like dogs, not always being perfectly obedient), and they 'roared and kicked out' at your DC?



To answer the original question, usually if a dog is over-excited and jumping up, the best thing is to turn your back, arms folded, and ignore. If you're shouting and kicking out, you're only going to get the dog more wound up. Generally that will just mean more excitement and jumping, but rarely a dog might see your behaviour as threatening and respond accordingly.

[vjg13]

I think you've been unlucky with these two incidents especially if close together but shouting and 'kicking out' at dogs will make your kids very nervous of dogs. Do you not have any parks near you with fenced off play areas where the kids can see dogs but be away from them?

[DavesMummy]

I really wouldn't advise coming on here using phrases like "kick out" as there are certain people on here who would as good as have you hung for the mere mention of it.

However, while I don't agree with the way you dealt with the situation I applaud you for coming on here to seek advice about how you should have approached the situation better

I have learnt through dog ownership that the best way to handle a jumping dog is to firmly, but calmly, say "off" while stepping back slightly. By all means protect your DC's especially as you do not know how the dog approaching is going to behave. If the first dog you came across didn't have a tag I would personally, circumstances permitting, have done my best to find it's owner (e.g. take it to vets to check for microchip) but understand that it isn't always possible. Personally, I would have kept walking and maybe the dog would have lost interest but that is a particulary unique situation.

As far as out of control dogs go in public areas such as parks I would have once again used "off" but also walked towards the owner and politely suggested that they needed to keep better control of their dog . Any strong reaction on your part will make the dog think you are playing with them so turn your back on them and ignore them...

Am sure their will be many others with different advice but hope this helps a little.

[Vallhala]

"i roared and kicked out."

"i love dogs..."

Make your mind up. One of those two statements is a blatant lie.

Advice:

1. If you kick out at a dog you run a serious risk of getting bitten. Do not kick out at a dog.
   

1. If you kick out at a dog you run a serious risk of being kicked back by an irate owner or dog-loving passer-by. Do not kick out at a dog.
   

There is plenty of additional advice I could give you but it's imperative that you learn the above first.


DavesMummy, you're not wrong. I would.

[littleducks]

HippyHippopotamus- I think you are very brave and tbh i wouldnt have any qualms about kicking out at a dog that was jumping on me or my child and would not stop

I would not be capturing a stray dog and taking it to a vet especially with a buggy and 2 small children

Dogs should not be allowed to go and touch/jump up on people they dont know in public places, especially if their owners are at a distance and cant see if you are welcoming or hating the dog

But then I like dogs at a distance but not near me (and hate stupid dog owners with big powerful dogs that they cant control in any manner)

[Caz10]

Disclaimer, I have both a big silly dog and a small child!
I don't really think much of the above advice is helpful to someone who is not comfortable around dogs! Grab it, play with it, take it to get scanned?!!! With 2 dc in tow?!! Someone not used to dogs would struggle to handle/hold a boisterous dog imo, and why should they have to?
On phone so can't scroll up to see previous posts, but whoever mentioned back turned, arms crossed etc seems the most sensible to me

[DooinMeCleanin]

Caz the op is not scared of dogs and wants to teach her dc not to be scared of dogs.

Had she said that she was scared or just simply did not like them then I wouldn't have advised holding the dogs, but to pick up a phone and call a dog warden takes barely any effort at all.

And no should have to help out strays, equally no has to help the homeless, but it is the right thing to do.

[AmazingBouncingFerret]

I dont think kicking out at a dog is very brave, more like stupid TBH! Firstly you are teaching your children to be afraid of dogs because of your negative behaviour and secondly the dog might bite back!

Most dogs know the command "NO!" or "OFF!" and simply ignoring the dog and walking away can often work wonders. Like children you are "rewarding" bad behaviour with any sort of attention, even if it is negative.

[AmazingBouncingFerret]

I forgot a thirdly... it's also cruel.

[Beamur]

I'd have put myself in between the dog and the child too and can understand the impulse to lash out at the animal if you were scared.
However, the advice on here is good - if it happens again, ignore the dog and turn your back on it.
Irresponsible/useless owners who can't control their dogs are a PITA.

[chickchickchicken]

you may not like this but i think the greatest risk to your dcs was yourself and not the dogs! besides for being cruel you made the situation into a potentially dangerous one by roaring and kicking.

i dont understand why you did that. the dogs shouldnt have jumped up but you never said the dogs were agressive, growling, snarling but your reaction could have caused a dog to bite.

as you say you love dogs and are not scared of them i cant understand why you would behave so irrationally.

btw i do have dogs and kids. i like dogs to behave. i like kids to behave too. however we dont live in a perfect world.

re helping out a possible stray animal - why would having two children with you prevent anyone doing that?

re how to deal with it in future - firmly but calming say 'no' or 'off', turn around with arms folded, or simply walk away

[Crawling]

I had a fear of dogs and as a result tried very hard not to transfer it. I have never kicked out at a dog because I was to scared to do that and years ago I would have been rying. Now I have overcome that fear were the above to happed to me I would have said Sit and if that failed no.

If that didnt work and I was going to a area where dogs often jump up on me and the pram I would take a umberella and open it in front of the pram. This provides a barrier and the dogs attention should then come on to you.

[littleducks]

How are you going to take this animal to a vets, presumerably as a stray it has no lead, possibly no collar, so it would need to be held in some way and transported

with one hand to push buggy, one hand to hold toddler and an animal who may not want to be captured and walked to the vet it seems impossible to me

[daisydotandgertie]

Kicking and roaring? Honestly? At the same time as claiming to love dogs. Who teaches dogs to be agressive I wonder?

If I found you kicking one of my dogs, I'd be calling the police and prosecuting you for animal cruelty faster than you could blink.

The dogs you've come across have done you no harm at all and yet you still think it's OK to kick them?

Shame on you.

[Beamur]

If your dog was behaving nicely though daisydotandgertie, this wouldn't happen would it?

[HippyHippopotamus]

i'm reading post by post so starting with

3cutedarlings I didn't say I kicked either dog. i said i 'kicked out'. this involved me pushing my foot out towards the dogs. it was to give the impression to the dogs that i was going to kick them. i had contact with the first one to push it away from us but not with the second. i did not harm either dog, apologies this wasn't clear from my OP. i couldn't have held on to the second dog even if i'd wanted to, given how it was leaping and it was a strong looking animal. i was not going to risk it pushing/pulling me over whilst i was holding dc1, especially given how slowly the owner was coming towards me. i forgot to mention above that it pushed over the lad playing football. and i absolutely agree with you about the recall bit

ok, next
DooinMeCleanin are you serious? i should have taken the stray to the vets? exactly how would this have happened?? it had no collar, i certainly had no lead/string with me. perhaps i could have tucked it up in the pushchair with my dc2
another apology coming up for missing out details in my OP.. there is a known issue of people breeding dogs for fighting in my area and the first dog could definitely been one of them. despite its size, it was very intimidating
i've covered your second point above

who's next...

Ephiny
i agree, the owners are at fault here. I didn't actually kick either dog and i apologise for giving the impression i did
good grief, you're comparing my children to a stray dog now? assuming you're being serious i will answer your question. if either of my children ran up to someone in a threatening manner and proved to be a threat to them ie they were brandishing a knife for example then yes, i wouldn't be surprised if they were roared and kicked out at. but, given that my children don't run around with knives, and are therefore not a threat to complete strangers then no, i wouldn't expect anyone to roar at them. Perhaps i've been lucky so far, as i said, my eldest is only 2.5yrs, but if i tell him to stop,wait, come back etc, then he listens to me every single time

ok, some sensible advice, thank you! that's all i was looking for!

vjg13
i agree, we've lived here for 3 years and its the first time anything like this has happened
the park we were in has a fenced off play area but the owners ignore it and to get to it, you need to walk through the main park, which is exactly what we were doing today. dcs are both very used to dogs, they have regular contact with a family member's dog and as i said in my OP, if a dog seems friendly i check with the owner if dc1 can stroke it

DavesMummy
you're right, i've realised my choice of words could have been better!
thank you for your kind words in your second paragraph
i suspect the second dog would have responded to 'off',so that's good to know, thank you.i'm not sure about the first, its not a breed i know anything about so it was a very unknown situation for me. the second dog, with hindsight, did just want to play but i found it intimidating due to its size. who knows what the intentions of the first dog were. it may well have lost interest if i'd walked away but i was more conscious of getting in between it and my dcs, which meant i couldn't walk away.
It does seem that ignoring them seems to be the sensible thing to do and this will obviously be better for dcs to witness as well so i'll definitely try this if there's a next time.
And yes, your message did help so thank you

Vallhala
you're wrong, neither is a lie, i don't lie, i have no need to. perhaps i should clarify that i love dogs that don't threaten my children.
the owner of the second dog was lucky not to have been punched by the angry father of the boy who was knocked over. but that was their battle, not mine.
if it happens again i will obviously try ignoring the dog and saying 'off'. if that doesn't work and it is still being intimidating/threatening towards my dc then there is nothing that would stop me preventing my dcs from being hurt. call it a maternal instinct if you like but no dog is going to ever attack my dcs if i'm there to prevent it.
i was attacked by a dog as a child. its owner told me it was just trying to kiss me, i was pinned to the floor and absolutely terrified
i have also been witness to a dog attacking someone in the park. fortunately someone had a bottle of water with them and they knew to throw water on it to release the girl's arm from its jaws
dogs are animals. end of story

littleducks
a voice of reason! thank you! thank you! i agree with your every word!

Caz10
i'm not scared of dogs but i am very uncomfortable with dogs that approach me uninvited, especially if their owner isn't within grabbing distance
back turned, arms crossed i can do!

DooinMeCleanin
i will make sure i get the dog warden's number on my phone tonight. so yes, that is some more sensible advice, thank you but given that i haven't ever needed to call them before, its not a number i know

as for helping strays, in a different situation i have helped a stray dog. i was on my own, driving down a country lane and a dog ran out in front of me. i pulled over, checked its collar, found his address so bundled him into the boot of my car and took him home (5 miles out of my way). the owner had a fancy intercom thing and refused to believe me that i had her dog in my car, reckoned i was just trying to rob her because her dog was in the kitchen. i suggested she went and checked in her kitchen before she came down to the gate to apologise to me in person. she didn't, she sent her son down instead to get the dog!
in that situation that was the right thing to do but in my situation yesterday, no way!

AmazingBouncingFerret
so i'm stupid, thanks for that. my negative behaviour was because i was genuinely scared by the first dog and concerned we were all going to get knocked over by the second

i will add a 'no' to my mental list of future actions

beamur
thank you

chickchickchicken
i did feel the first one was a threat though
i was irrational from a genuine worry for the safety of my dcs
you think i should have helped the stray too? i'm amazed, i really am


i hope that i don't have anymore situations like today's or yesterday's but if i do, i will ignore and walk away from the dog in the first instance. say 'no' and 'off' in the second. if these actions don't work, i will do whatever i have to do to keep my children safe

thank you again to those who offered sensible advice

[minimu1]

Blimey why do dog owners have to be so antagonistic. Sorry I disagree with the others and you get loads of sympathy from me.

The OP has come on here to ask for advice and she gets a complete flaming for asking what is the right thing to do. Can we not be more tolerate? Surely people asking to be educated must be positive?

I hate the fact that dogs should affect other peoples lives through bad training from their owners. You should be able to walk through a park and down your road without being jumped on by dogs.


If your children had approached the posters above dogs and pulled at them and jumped on them they would be wailing and screaming how outrageous it was!

If a dog does approach you and unfortunately there are some dreadful owners out there so it may happen again. I would stand between the pushchair and I would show the dog I did not want it around. That may be raising my voice to it or it may be ignoring it and hoping it loses interest. Standing still is usually the best option but with children that is not always possible. Also not knowing the dog and not being experienced around dogs it is hard to read them.

Generally stay calm, stay still and quiet the dog should move onto more interesting targets.
If in doubt I am a dog owner so not anti dog in anyway - I just spend my whole life trying to educate owners how to train their dogs effectively.

[HippyHippopotamus]

i've x posted with loads so...

Crawling
an umbrella is a great idea, thank you

daisydotandgertie*
if one of your dogs was threatening me or my children, trust me, it wouldn't be you calling the police

littleducks exactly!

[HippyHippopotamus]

minimu1
thank you for your support and for your appreciation of my situation!
dc1 was shouting 'naughty dog, my leg's not food'. it didn't bite him but it felt to him like it was trying to

i will stay as still as a toddler allows!

[iwastooearlytobeayummymummy]

Hi Hippy

I understand your concern, my advice would be to keep your arms down or croseed over your chest (resist the urge to flap them around in a shooing fashion iyswim) and in a loud commanding voice shout Off, Off
Also avoid eye contact with the dog, turning your body away slightly.
The kennel club web site has good advice for children, such as make like tree ie stand stil, arms to the side and not looking at the dog ( could you practice playing at home perhaps?)

I like my dog but not at the expense of other people and children, and would quite understand if someone kicked out at her if they were scared.

[HippyHippopotamus]

thanks tooearly, i'll have a look at their website now

[mrsgordonfreeman]

I quite like dogs, but I come across the odd unruly staff/pit bull type in the park. They are usually lovely but if I don't want the dog to approach me, I look down, away from the dog, and ignore it. If it's snappy, I put my hands in my pockets.

You do not need to shout at the dog. Show it that you are not interested in it and are not a threat.

[Vallhala]

"you're wrong, neither is a lie, i don't lie, i have no need to. perhaps i should clarify that i love dogs that don't threaten my children."

I repeat, one of the statements you wrote was a lie. The above just proves me right. Read what you have just written and think about it.

There was nothing in your OP which suggested that either dog was likely to threaten your children. You appear to have subsequently adopted that view to justify your actions.

If I saw you kicking out at a dog... any dog... I wouldn't mess around with calling the police. My way of dealing with you would be far more expedient and may just prevent me from yet again having to pick up the pieces of a human's ignorance and abuse.

I've come to the conclusion that your intention is far more to obtain validation for your cruel, ignorant, potentially dangerous and foolhardy attempts to kick two dogs than to seek advice and frankly I can't be bothered with you any longer. I'm a rescuer - I have animals to save from harm and deal with, most of whom are the victims of similarly idiotic human beings and all of whom are far more deserving of my time than someone who continues to try to justify kicking out at unaggressive, if badly cared for, dogs.