X Factor - British Song Book-The RESULTS! Who has the 'Apathy Factor' ?

(375 Posts)
Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:08:19

I hope ICBINB goes tonight.

Or Tamehra, just for fun.

Not looking forward to Miley.

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 19:15:29

After last night they all should go!! Shocking situation !

BOF Sun 17-Nov-13 19:16:29

God, I can't bear the thought of The Tongue. Yeeuch.

VioletPlum Sun 17-Nov-13 19:16:33

I hope she twerks all over Loius.

Sadly I can see Meh in the finals because the judges like her even though she makes Tulisa look like a member of the aristocracy.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:19:49

I used to think twerking was a combination of Tweeting and something. confused. Had no idea what it was. I wish that was still the case.

They won't invite Lily Allen on, will they <scared>shockgrin

Oops posted on the last thread. It's not interesting enough to repeat here!

I would hope ICBINB goes tonight, but then I'd be completely unable to remember any of the contestants.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:36:22

I thought it was good, Arbitrary .I prefer the idea of a football to a footballergrin

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:37:47

Arbitrary- we will be left with the less inspired Nicknames.

Like Ta-Meh-ra.

It's very sad.

I prefer a football to a footballer too. Apparently it's some kind of Newcastle United legend but I've never heard of him.

It has not been a vintage xfactor in any way. They've tried so hard to reinvent it but the contestants are just so dull.

Well done on including the apathy factor in the title. grin

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 19:43:41

I hope they have a twist.

They all go, and we get to vote new ones from the auditions.


Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:43:58

JLS are on Strictly. I thought they had split up.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 19:45:20

They should have. This is shit

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:46:30

Hopefully the big twist will be when they dump Tamehra at the 11th Hour, for pinching hair gel from Superdrug.

And bring back PHIFF

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:47:31

Maryz. It was.

Ruff Copy are the new JLS. With skirts.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 19:47:33

Signing in for tonight.

Miley to go.

<misses point of show>

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:48:57

<arf> @miley to go.

I agree. She is a car crash. And she's older than 16There's no possible excuse. grin

They should replace her with her dad. He can wheel out achey breaky heart.

directoroflegacy Sun 17-Nov-13 19:53:35

DD (8) has been warned I might have to chang channels during Miley's performance in case of inappropriate things with dwarves etc

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 17-Nov-13 19:54:54

I hope Miley keeps her extraordinataly sp long tongue in her mouth.
I think she's one of them Lizard people.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 19:55:10

i do hope Miley behaves.

But since Thicko and Gaga didn't (and DD1 is still scarred by the Gaga madnessgrin) I'm not hopeful. grin

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 19:57:46

How funny would it be if Miley came on in a high necked flannel maxi dress and sang 'Amazing Grace'.

I think they're getting the controversial people in on purpose to keep the ratings up because the actual show is shite

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 19:57:57

They are trying to imply on Twitter that she isn't going to.

Ds reckons they are just trying to up the viewing figures

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 19:58:22

X post Mary!

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 19:58:24

X-post, SayCool

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 19:59:59

I've only got it on to see what Miley does. I've got a raging headache so should really turn it off.

VioletPlum Sun 17-Nov-13 20:01:23

It'll be better than Robbie Williams' self-indulgent croon festival though.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:01:29


Here we go

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:01:32

Maybe Miley will borrow Taylor's black polo neck and balaclava

and not actually sing

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:02:04

Signing in.

Can we vote Miley Showoff off?

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:02:16

Violet- oh blimey, yes.

Bazza is singing.


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:02:45

DH just said 'I hope Shitsinger's wearing..... Something. Tonight'

It was hilarious.

Abi Alton Joan Lewis

Sam Bailey Loose Screw

Hannah Barrett - Sausage Droll Greggsorcist

Sam Callahan I Can’t Believe it’s not Bieber (ICBINB)

Tamera Foster Ta-MEH-rah

Luke Friend - *Mowgli/Crood/Sideshow Bob/Swampy/KimberleyDoesn’tWash/Max Wall/The Wee Barr*a

Kingsland Road - The Merkins

Nicholas McDonald Wee Jimmy Wanky or Pob or Wee Barra

Miss Dynamix Preggaz’n’Peng MissDirection

Rough Copy * The Duffers Duff Copy Woof Copy Bun Loving Criminals Snuff Copy Bail Bros Rough Criminals Refused Entry*

Lorna Simpson Yawna or Voldemort

Shelley Smith Draggy Nanfucker

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:03:41

I would so much rather see Louis and Sharon perform.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:03:50

Evening all

Bolding fail again. Sigh

I say Sossidge and La Meh in the bottom two

BOOO to Bazza flogging that gawdawful Macca-Cuntry-Lite song of his. BOOOO to Miley Yawnsome
Just BOOOOO all round really

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:04:43

Loose Screw slagged Miley off in the tabloids today. Allegedly of course.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:04:47

Shitty is walking like Morticiahmm

Good to see you're fully in the spirt of this thread this series, sue.


TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:05:26

Did Shitty just drop her stash?

I have explained my issues with BlahBlah's 'do what you want with my body' performance to DD. She is leading a playground campaign to change the lyric to 'do what you want with my XXXXX' - insert to taste. Current front-runners include 'sandwich', 'moshi monster' and 'scooter'.
Try it, it's catchy grin

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:05:42

Aye, definitely Sossidge in the bottom. I think Loose Screw isn't safe though - who is voting for her?

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:05:59

I miss the Merkins. And even Preggaz. I can't remember the others on tat list Sue.


Ooo, the group mime. My fave. And a Take that one.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:06:23

Shit. Tartan pleather?

<dies a little>

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:06:37

Gazza's showcasing his new style tonight.

Bumford and Sons

Hahahahahahaha at ICBINB. That was bad even by his standards.
Nevermind. Butlins will still have him.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:06:42

Yes, we all definitely all have the Apathy Factor.

Oh lovely- Bazza looks so happy they are killing miming to his song.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:06:52

That hat looks like the instruction picture for a condom. Where you have to leave the pinch bit.

Seems apt as a cock is wearing it.

What have the stylists got tamehra in?

Theimpossiblegirl Sun 17-Nov-13 20:07:19

My ears hurt!

It looks so much like a nappy it's not funny.

Roar at the Duffers having come as the Bay City Rollers but in pleather.
So much pleather. So very much and so very wrong.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:07:47

This is particularly grim

There's a droning in my ear, oh they've started' singing'

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:08:01

Fab LS nearly punched tamehra

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:08:17

Who on earth is in charge of wardrobe this year? I don't know a lot about fashion, but I know they look bloody ridiculous!

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:08:28

They must have a pleather job lot.

Have they got Tamehra in someone else's catsuit thing? It doesn't seem to fit exactly.

We should start a save the leather campaign. Think of how many leathers have died for this shit.

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:09:30

Oh!!! Tamera got the shittiest lyrics there and still fucked them up

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:09:32

Ds has just said "who are this lot?"

Now for a 15 year old who is interested in music to have got this far through without watching even once is an indication of how far down it has fallen.

There were even pleather patches on Wee Jimmy's top. Is it some kind of bizarre product placement, like with Samsung? Has Mingehead got shares in PleatherCorp?

Bloody auto correct. Pleathers.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:10:16

Arb, thank you! I was wondering what her outfit reminded me of. DS is wearing something similar....

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:10:26

So, I missed last night. Who was Top Utter Shit?

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:10:39

That was awful-what's up with tamera???

Davros Sun 17-Nov-13 20:11:13

I have given up through utter boredom. We watch the results show recorded so we can fast forward if necessary. There is nothing not shown on the results show that you need to see on the Saturday show AND we get to larf at Lady Gaga etc and avoid Celine Dion. The whole thing has become utterly shite and I used to luv it.

maryz my DS also 15 said exactly the same, has announced he may have a kip for an hour while waiting for imasleb

I know it's wrong. But I just can't cope with Loose Screw's teef.
It's like Pinhead all over again. Well, no- they're not bad teeth. But I can't take my eyes off the gap.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:11:41

ICBINB was bad!!!

Tamehra forgot her words last night.

ICBINB was obviously horrible. So was crowd. And the duffers sang Coldplay.

It was poor all round.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:11:50

I missed last night as well, haven't even bothered to try and catch up anywhere.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:12:07

DS2(16) is reading a book instead of watching this!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:12:10

I have slightly less apathy for the Duffers. Cos they have some sort of personality. And weird taste in clothing...


At least autocorrect is giving me something to really, truly hate tonight.

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:13

Agreed Maryz DD aged 10 will not watch it, she really should be target age??

TallulahTwinkle Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:20

Why oh why was tamera the only one in White when the others were in red? Could they want her to win??,?


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:23

We're not even getting amusing comments from Shazza anymore. Is she in rehab or summat?

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:39

The correct term for the gap is diaestema Sue.
<remembers dental nursing days>

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:44

Have we got a Imasleb thread Maryz?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:13:55

Backstreet boys??! Wtf?

The duffers would be Unmemorable without the weird clothing though. I think.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:14:19

So mahoosive they haven't got a slot on the main show!

I think there could be an argument for only doing the thread on a Sunday.
It's not as if they don't show 90% of the performance anyway

DS1(13) has always refused to watch this. But he's not really a follower of popular stuff.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:15:13

*diastema even! bloody iPad

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:15:14

Perhaps tamera has been rifling through Shazzers 'special' cabinet

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:15:51

Miley was better when she wasn't so try hard.

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:15:52

Oh good lord no !!!!!!!!!!

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:16:12

Even though the Duffers sang Coldplay, I've decided they can win.

I really don't like Loose Screw, dull, boring, and dated. Yes, she can singbellow but other than that she is pants.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:16:12

Can I just say this:


<and breathe>

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:16:46

And the purpose of the sanddrift is?

Oooo, look. She's on one of them rocks from Star Trek. Watch out Miley, there's usually a wrongun behind them

directoroflegacy Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:00

Ok a sand pit....

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:12

She looks like Stig of the Dump.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:12

Hmm the Ethel Merman look..nice.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:24

Yes, there is a Cleb thread.

Miles in clothes-wearing shocker shock

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:49

Oops Miley

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:17:53

Does she need a wee?

Or is it a termite mound? <muses>
Eh up, she's on the move. So, turban and shirley bassey dress. Improvement on the teddy thing tho, non?

Lorelilee Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:04

Whatever else you say about her, the girl can sing!


I think the duffers should win too. I don't like loose screw either, for the same reasons. It's nothing to do with her age (most of the music I listen to is made by people over 30); it's that she's just so completely out of date.

Miley is crap. At least she has some clothes on though.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:31

Its in a box, like one of those things you keep worms in.

Theimpossiblegirl Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:31

I think Miley needs a wee.

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:46

She cannot sing live

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:52

Is she wearing shoulder pads...under her skin confused

It is amusing me muchly, the Mound. It's very School Play Prop, innit?
Someone's been at that ALL DAY with the poster paints.

ExcuseTypos Sun 17-Nov-13 20:18:58

Has she still got her curlers in.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:04

That is an awesomely bad set. It's almost distracting me from the fact she's wearing 100% more clothes than usual, and that's distracting me from the screech-bat nature of her singing.

The turban hat accentuates the roundness of her face. It wasn't a great idea.

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:39

Does she really need to shout

directoroflegacy Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:53

I've got one of those turbans from Primark,when you have wet hair. They are v useful!

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:54

The jewels on the turban keep hitting her in the face when she gets shouty.

She didn't think it through, that dress.No good at all for poo-squatting
She's making some not v nice noises. Maybe she's cross.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:56

I love X factor threads. In one weekend we have had architrave and diaestema.

It's an education. grin

BouncingJellyfish Sun 17-Nov-13 20:19:59

When she started I thought she'd just come out of the shower and didn't have time to dress.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:03

Is that wee squatting then?

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:03

Nicole is jigging away. She'd annoy me!

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:09

Nicole is jigging away. She'd annoy me!

DS2 (4) has spent most of the day making a model of a soft play. It looks more convincing than that mound.

Theimpossiblegirl Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:29

I never thought I'd say this but I really miss Hannah Montana!

crypes Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:31

Was she sleep walking?

BOF Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:39

How boring. She ain't all that with her clothes on really. Although to be fair, they are shit clothes.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:49

She has a very deep voice.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:50

'Bangers' tour confused

Is Gok supporting her?

CominThroughTheWry Sun 17-Nov-13 20:20:58

Waiting for wardrobe malfunction when her halter neck snaps on purpose

I give you bangerz

AndHarry Sun 17-Nov-13 20:21:13

Why was Miley Cyrus dressed like Osama bin Laden hiding out in Tora Bora? confused

I think she was going for '20s Egypt, with the staging and the look.
I got '80s Nativity though. Look! A Star! On the mound! Let us follow it!

Wow. If she was being judged, someone would have pointed out that she kept on singing flat.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:22:30

And here's the album ad....


Fuckin' 'ell

Gutted123 Sun 17-Nov-13 20:22:38

That sounded awful. I bet if you were in the audience it would have been actually painful.

She's got a very unpleasant voice.

Bangerz and car crash.

Ds2 did get through a lot of gold paint though. Maybe he was just pretending he was making the cardboard soft play and was actually constructing Miley's set in our kitchen.

And yes, bangerz. hmm

It's a matter of time before she turns into Pat Butcher, Bof. She's there with the hair and the shoulders. Slo-mo-morph.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:22:58

If it wasn't for the threads I wouldn't have to watch this shite at all.

I blame you lot

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:22:59

I thought she was just doing the whole fake walking down stairs thing that people do behind low walls.

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:23:10

Maybe you could tweet her a pic of it Arb for her tour?

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:23:17

She looksed nervous when she started her climb down.

Bangerz like sausages, I choose to believe.

Lorelilee Sun 17-Nov-13 20:24:04

Does 'Bangers' mean the same in the US as it means here then?

DS said she looks like the dinner lady at school hmm

MrsBramleyApple Sun 17-Nov-13 20:24:33

What song did Sam Bailey sing please?? I couldn't work it out from the little I heard tonight! I didn't watch last night!

BOF Sun 17-Nov-13 20:24:44

Oh aye, Mary- the threads are my only reason for bothering. Over the years, we have built up a proper posse- I love you all grin

I always feel that Lindor have a hint of paint stripper flavour about them.

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:24:53

Now 86!!!
I have Now 2 on cassette in the loft.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 17-Nov-13 20:25:20

DS2 - who do you like the best on X Factor?
Me - none of them
DS2 - Yes, but who do you want to win?
Me- none of them
DS2 - Yes, but who is good?
Me- None of them
DS2 - Well, why are you watching it then?
Me - Good question...

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:25:29

Like I said last night, can we donate Myleene.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:25:38

It was 'Something' by The Beatles. Even though it didn't sound like that. As Shitty said, it was like George harrison doing Celine Dion.

Hotpoint have been making that tumble drier for at least a decade. We've had it that long.

MyKleen looks poorlysick. Is she poorlysick?

Oh,it's Bazza
Do we think it'll dance?

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:26:38

Louis is going for the Pontins blue coat look tonight.

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:26:41

You do know you're not supposed to taste paint stripper??

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:26:47


at least Simon never sang

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:26:55

I was given NOW That's What I call music with my Sony Walkman in 1981.

I also had roller boots.

By Boxing Day I was Cliff in Wired for Sound


Bangerz must mean something else in the us. I can't imagine they were going for shitty cars and sausages with the album title.

Bazza is being groomed to replace Macca. You'll see.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:27:21

and me Arb.

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:27:29

Although sniffing it might help with the enjoyment of listening to gaz

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:27:39

He might be a boring bastard but even I have to admit he's got better looking as he's aged.

Hope for munters everywhere

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:27:44

He's got a touch of the Eltons about his mannerisms.

temporarilyjerry Sun 17-Nov-13 20:27:57

Me: Gary's going to sing now.
DS2: Does he have to?

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:00

Bazza looked hot in the Fail when he went to Afghan to see the troops.

Wired for Sound makes my soul happy grin

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:14

Bazza- twerk a bit. G'wan.

crypes Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:25

Abit like Maccas boring crap.

Well, I'm mostly going on what I'd imagine it tastes like from the smell really.

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:36

Me too TSS. Still have my roller boots too!

Gazza, you're nothing without the other four!

He has, Noel. He used to be made entirely of squares.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:41

He is a good ad for not needing to have a good voice to do well. He must give the contestants such hope

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:28:57

Bazza looked mighty fine in that last screen shot of him;-)

I hope Sam Callahan takes
Note on how to perform and play an instrument

SamU2 Sun 17-Nov-13 20:29:14

Is it just me or is the sound awful tonight? really quiet and dull.

I'd have preferred Howard. If he'd had a wash.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:29:30

In 40 years, our children and grandchildren will watch any big televised event, praying that Gary isn't going to wheeled out, in the same way we hope Macca wont be gurning his way through 'Hey Jude'

I suspect it's a mixture of him looking better with age and us all getting older and liking a very different look.

LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:06

I'm sorry.. I can't help it.. I lurve him! <hides and crouches>

ROARING at the prepared stage invasion
Upwards of twenty people dad dancing. Rock on.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:35

Bless him. He's trying to have charisma. And just failing.

Great song writer. But shit stage presence.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:36

Bangers = a big song or a member of a gang hmm

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:45

It's a bit "knees up mother brown"

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:53

I loved Howard.

Go then. What's stopping you ??

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 17-Nov-13 20:30:56

I had Now 4 on cassette. Still have it somewhere.

I fear you are right sieve. They'll be muttering 'fucking national treasure, my arse'.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:31:24

The pink balloons were pathetic.

Merrylegs Sun 17-Nov-13 20:31:28

Ah. He's auditioning for 'National Treasure'.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:31:29

Roar at young Elton

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:31:31

I really genuinely don't rate Borelow.

I only like the Take That songs that Mark Owen wrote, and the only Bazza song I vaguely like is that Geraldine/ Peter Kaye Xmas one grin

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:32:05

It was better than Robbie though

VioletPlum Sun 17-Nov-13 20:32:12

Just catching up. Miley's been on the sherry with Nicole tonight. Shame she can't handle her drink.

I'm telling you. OBE. Writing 'special' songs for events. Being groomed.
He'll prolly re-write Candle in the Wind when Her Mag pops off and be made a peer. Then just get dusted down and wheeled out for Royal Variety performances and Jubilees.

directoroflegacy Sun 17-Nov-13 20:32:26

Gary is half Noel Edmonds, half David Essex now

My friends and I used to debate who was better looking, mark or Robbie. We were all wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:32:41

Wonder if those NOW cassettes are worth owt???

snice Sun 17-Nov-13 20:32:44

bloody hell computer problems so very late to this tonight-did everyone else long for Miley C to slide down her giant slope on a tea tray?

Better than Robbie isn't much of a compliment.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:33:13

Snice grin

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:33:20

Barlow is to music,what Beckham is to sport.

Gagging for a knighthood, both of them.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 17-Nov-13 20:33:45

Ooh, fuck me. Hobbit trailer. Richard Armitage, Luke Evans, Orlando Bloom...

I tried to watch the first hobbit film this week on netflix. I couldn't get all the way through. I can't imagine choosing to sit through the second one in a cinema.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:34:54

I hate LOTR and the Hobbit. I don't get the point.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:35:09

Bazza quote in the Fail, so probably not true, on Afghanistan, "Everyone had a gun strapped to their belts. It was insane."

No, shit Shirlock!

Making a MOCKERY of the peerage, it is. Borelow. Beckham. Fecking Linekar. Surrallun.
Jaysus. It's only a matter of time before it's Dame Denise Van Outen or Sir Jezza Vile.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:35:30

Haha Arb, same. Couldn't get through 15 minutes of it. Slow moving turgid bollocks.

Has anyone seen the pisstake of the JL advert?

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:35:51

I would say not. Didn't NOW 1 have Green Door and Shaddapaya Face?

I miss the 80's and rollerblades.

I actually quite enjoyed LOTR but the hobbit... Talk about dragging something out.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:36:06

Beckham is reportedly a cert for a Knighthood in January! hmm

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:36:10

Jaysus? Jesus has a Knighthood?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:36:41

Sir Jesus. <cracks up>

Lorelilee Sun 17-Nov-13 20:37:04

I can't remember who said they didn't like any of the songs Gazza wrote but, I'm sorry, 'Rule the World' is absolute class!

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:37:11

I've just looked up and realised ds is playing FIFA.

I thought it was just a long ad break

He is Our Lord, Raah. I shouldn't have to tell you this.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:37:46

Sam's outfit is not flattering.

I managed to get through about 90 minutes of it. In two sittings. But I was really drawing upon my long years of learning to sit through really boring things to do that. Even I was defeated.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:00

Lorilee it was me and we'll have to agree to disagree- I think it's a load of old toss grin

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:20

So fake!!

Louis is worried that two of his acts might be the bottom two.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:30

I do like Rule the World- Ilove a lotof Take that stuff, actually. But he is getting middle aged- and he's only (nearly) 43.

Lorelilee Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:31

God, Sausage Roll needs a slap!

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:31


CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:38

Someone call Hannah an ambulance

She's proper wheezy, innit? Also, have you clocked Kimbo's Alice Band grin?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:44

Did she just have an orgasm?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:47

How can it be boring when you have Richard Armitage to look at?

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:38:56

Aww with his see-through ears

Sossidge sounded like my mates poodle after a run!

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:39:20

Yay the Duffers

LegoAcupuncture Sun 17-Nov-13 20:39:22

I usually lurk on these threads, but felt the need to say how much I hate Hannah and her extreme overreaction when she gets through. So bloody annoying!

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:39:36

I suppose Jesus needs a Knighthood, for services to lloyd Webber musicals, Sue

lightning strike me down

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:39:53

Thickly thuggo still not through

That's the sort of sentiment one should unlurk with, Lego.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:13

Ok, what's up? Quick summary pease

I can't insist on turning it on for fear the kids would realise I watch it

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:31

Luke is one of the only contestants ever to be getting fatter as the series goes on

travellingbird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:43

Oooh Luke in the bottom! Didn't expect that

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:48

Maryz - Zingzilla and ICBINB are in the bottom two

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:49

Ta da Sam

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:51

ICBINB is going home thank Sir Jesus!

It's kind of an inherited title, Our Lord grin

Nooooo, Tamehra
So ICBINB to go. Straight to Butlins by way of turning on the lights in Cleethorpes.

LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:53

Good summary Noelwine

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:40:54

Oh bollocks.

Can we save Zingzilla then? Cos hes marginally better than ICBINB.

BouncingJellyfish Sun 17-Nov-13 20:41:08

Goodbye Sam!

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:41:13

Louis will abstain!! Easy choice for him seeing he can't decide deck all!!'hmm

nancy75 Sun 17-Nov-13 20:41:17

Can't even be bothered to watch tonight, i am working on blueprints for my punchable TV. i hope to have it ready in time for next weeks show.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:41:21

Would a spoof of the John Lewis ad not have Robin Thicke singing?

Aintnobodylovesnanbetter Sun 17-Nov-13 20:41:30

I've watched the whole episode on mute as i like following all your comments

There would be no point in tamehra being in the bottom two, as the judges would automatically save her.
But what an over reaction.

At least screw loose winning would really piss tamehra off. That's something.

ICBINB to go. Obviously.

CroodBoy HAS got fatter. I think his paunch last night finally Dunforhim

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 17-Nov-13 20:42:50

So Sam out then.
About bloody time.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:43:09

That's the best way, Ain't

Thanks SayCool

Sam to go

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:43:12

Didn't JLS split up sometime last year?

I keep seeing them on stuff and I'm getting myself all confused

Think I've found someone to loath, -well 2-- sausage and meh

snice Sun 17-Nov-13 20:43:20

I had a dream about HowardTakeThat last night-we were looking after children in a nursery together-he was very attractive.
I came over all funny and couldnt concentrate on the kids

They're both going to be absolute shit in this sing off though.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:43:52

I dislike the Zingzilla almost as much as I dislike Hannah.

I dislike neither as much as I hate Louis who is going to make me punch my telly when he vacillates about which one of the bottom feeders in the sing off to send home.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:44:02

Mel off Mel 'n' Sue seems to be the voiceover of choice for everything at the moment.

Cor, you lucky bugger, snice.
I mostly dream about what I should be doing at work. And it isn't Howard.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:44:13

Noel- they did. They are really milking the farewell bit...

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:44:16

Did anyone else just get giant turkeys with laser eyes?

Or have I finally lost the plot....?

One of my best friends at school claimed to really fancy Jason orange. About 6 months later she came out, so I guess she was just picking one at random. grin

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:04

Bazza is going to take great pleasure in sending ICBINB home.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:10

I think Luke is being fed Sossidges.


NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:14

I can't think about Howard Take That now without thinking of the Star Stories episode, where he talked like Chewbacca grin

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:17

Love Ant and Dick in the Jungle.

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:39

We did SayCool

Maybe they could bring in giant turkeys with laser eyes for the xfactor elimination.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:53

They can't take 15 minutes to decide who goes can they?

travellingbird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:45:57

Guitar = cheating

Starting out shouting does not bode well.

LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:18

On a good night they can, Maryz...

snice Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:18

there was no action in my Howard dream Sue-although to be honest I would have done if he'd asked me

That's what XF needs to do, actually make them sing for survival.
Arnie can chase the loser with an elephant gun.

DH just wandered in and said who are they? Are they gonna do a duet grin

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:36

Ah see now, it wouldn't be X Factor without the U2 cover

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:37

U2-how very original.

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:40

When Will he ditch that chuffing tourniquet???

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:43

DH suggests he may be looking for shampoo...

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:46:45

Why has he his Nans scarf on his arm?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:01

Raahh maybe that's why she's so happy? grin

Somebody is letting Luke make dreadful song choices now.

He's got a tourniquet on tonight too.

I hate bono. Maybe he's trying to stoke up hate by association?

Ewwww at his singing sex face
I can't un-see that.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:26

travelling- at least he can sort of play. Unlike ICBINB.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:29

Are his batteries running out?

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:37

I'm watching again.

There was 6 minutes between ad breaks shock

Davros Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:47

David Beckham deserves a Knighthood, as does Rod Stewart imo

travellingbird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:47:52

This is the worst I've ever heard him

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:00

Say- maybe. They could duet. Maybe.

He makes very unattractive faces while he sings.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:10

I hate Saint Bono even more than I hate Macca and Louis added together.

Tiredemma Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:15

I do wish they would stop dressing him up as david essex

Youreall, I was JUST about to post that. Your DH has stolen my funny grin

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:29

God yes on the sex face! shock

Very dull - but probably not awful enough to be worse than the Orange Boy.

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:30

I wonder what song Sam won't be able to sing.

DH has now wandered off muttering about today's yoof and that he's seen better buskers outside the bus depot grin bless him

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:44

Rod Stewart???

please be joking


thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:48:59

Why are these people allowed to ruin perfectly untouchable songs !!!

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:02



Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:03

Louis likes U2 doesn't he?

Aintnobodylovesnanbetter Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:07

Has he got a sore throat

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:09

Ah, the obligatory GooGoo Dolls cover.

Why don't they just give ICBINB a part in Hollyoaks and have done?

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:18

Can they send both home??

FacebookWanker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:20

This is awful

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:21

Ah see now it wouldn't be X Factor without the GooGoo cover


Because we haven't had enough of this particular track.

You'll still be going home in a few minutes Sammy-boy.

Is this the first time we've had this since CockOozer?

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:49:53

Appropriate song, this

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:11

He looks defeated already

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:25

I have realised who he reminds me of.

Its Aston from JLS. They have the same shaped head.

directoroflegacy Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:25

Sam is definitely better than last night, but it's still time to say bye

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:31

The world won't see you. Hopefully.

No. They all sang it in boot camp.

Maryz Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:41

ds says this is a great song if you can't sing. Very easy, apparently.

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:45

Why don't they just skip the vote.

We could get to the jungle faster, avoid Louis and my telly'd be intact.

SamU2 Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:50

Sam can sing well-ish when he sings high.

No one can sing like Bono. No one should try to take his songs on. It should be law.

Did he just flash his tits at the audience?
Ok then.

LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:50:58

Oh bless... Someone put him out of his misery... Bless..

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:51:01

Weirdly it's actually better than Zingy. But they'll still get rid of him. He's not edgy enough, what with washing his hair and all.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:51:10

Totes emosh

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:51:46

They've not done all they can, have they. They haven't fought to the death over a lava filled pit.

It is easy to sign. Even I can hold a tune along to iris.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:51:59

Louis likes both of them

But he prefers Nicholas.

Look at poor Crood's tummy strain on his shirt

Well Louis' abstained, so it might finish on time.

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:52:39

She threw a pen at him.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:52:40

Please send ICBINB home.

It's time.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:13

Sieve- I'm sure he doeswink

BOF Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:15

It's unusual for Louis to have two boys in the bottom on the same night...

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:23


LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:23

Sorry to ask... ICIBINB??

travellingbird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:27

Take it like a man? Oh please

Sieveoooplay Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:39

He will go far....

Skegness, Minehead and Bognor.

He might go extremely far but not in the music industry. Good work ethic isn't pop music specific.

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:46

grin Bof

LalaDipsey Sun 17-Nov-13 20:53:46

BOF!,!!! thanks

BOF grin grin

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:54:03

BOF- maybe not that unusual...

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:54:09

Bof grin

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 20:54:13

Oh BOFgrin

......I'm not sure it is, Bof

<dubious comedy double act we is>

Taking it like a man may just be how he's stayed in this long.

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:01

Sam looked better before the stylists got their hands on him..

travellingbird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:28

His recap video had no singing in it...ha

TSSDNCOP Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:32


Now fuck off.

He's been tango'd

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:54

Maybe Sam can end up on towie !!

LadyBeagleEyes Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:57

Time for the jungle.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:55:58

No regrets.

Apart from last night with that guinea pig, Louis. That was uncalled for...

CP: everyone looks better before the stylists get their hands on them. That seems to be the purpose of the stylists.

BOF Sun 17-Nov-13 20:56:12

Oh Sue, this stuff just writes itself grin

IamInvisible Sun 17-Nov-13 20:56:17

I hate seeing their dreams shattered, no matter how much they've hurt my ears!

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:56:26

Jessie J!!


Argh. Olly murs. And Jessie J.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:56:33

Just the SIX acts left then eh?

<slits wrists>

I don't think I can do Imasleb here. For one thing I've flounced. And for two, it will have other posters on. Not sure I can cope.

So anyone bought tickets for the live shows? Thought not.

The bum jokes, Bof. It's what we do.

VioletPlum Sun 17-Nov-13 20:57:41

BOF wins the thread grin

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 20:57:47

Well, as ever, it has been a joy....

Nighty night, y'all.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:57:51

Poor Crood will be face first in the fridge now, shovelling in the chilled carbs like there's no tomorrow

SaltySeaBird Sun 17-Nov-13 20:57:53

DH is a bit hmm at Dermot signing off at 9pm on a Sunday evening with "have a great weekend" ...

G'night <wanders off to put kettle on>

snice Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:07

till next week y'all

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:08

Only murs next week? Might be washing my hair guys!

CPtart Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:27

Olly even

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:33

In a somewhat strange act of kindness my Dad got us tickets to the XF show a couple of years ago.

We sold them sharp ish.

NoelOfLorst Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:37

Night all. Not sure if I have the strength for Sleb <ponders>

FacebookWanker Sun 17-Nov-13 20:58:48

Iaminvisible I feel so guilty now for going on about how awful his singing was each week

IorekByrnisonsArmour Sun 17-Nov-13 21:00:05

Time for Homeland and wine

As always, it's been emotional

Until next week

thistlelicker Sun 17-Nov-13 21:00:26

I thought Jessie j hates shite factor ....

How fickle is she since she left the voice !!! shock

Nah, can't do it.
Next week y'all. CroodBoy may be entirely spherical, like Violet Beauregard, by then.

Raahh Sun 17-Nov-13 21:04:29

and purple.

At least that's something to look forward too...

DF (visiting right now) wouldn't let me watch tonight <<whines>> he wanted to watch documentaries FFS.

See y'all next week

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now