X FACTOR- 21/22nd September- It's the last of the auditions!

(564 Posts)
Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 14:23:13

Yep, even though we have only seen about a dozen acts, it's the last weekend of the auditions.

The last time in the ROOM and the ARENA, where allegedly, there are 4000 people.

Apparently this week's highlights include a bunch of pensioners- aged between 68-94shock and some rocker bloke who failed last year.


Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 18:44:46

I now have wine.

This is good.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 19:14:10

Ah the joys of wine

I too am imbibing.

What will Gary's pearls of wisdom be today?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 19:18:54

Whatever we are on, won't be a patch on whatever Shitsinger has been sniffing. grin

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 19:20:58

I need to get dd2 back to bed. She has decided dancing on the landing is preferable to sleepgrin

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 19:22:32

I'm relying on you lot to make me laugh. DH has gone until January and I am proper sad. I have no wine or chocolate because it gives me migraines, I have fizzy Ribena!hmm

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 19:26:59

oh, little passes non-alcoholic wine and a chocolate free cake

I'm hoping there will be something good tonight.

Is it me, or have the auditions been shorter? Maybe it's the double episodes.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 19:27:04

Littlemiss - stick some vodka in it! grin

I am currently rrocking DS back to sleep while DD shouts for me in the next room.

Woe betide them if they're not silent in the next thirty minutes......

Christ I want whatever Sharon's on!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 19:28:39

All alcohol gives me bloody migraines Saycool. I'm having Botox soon, so maybe I'll be able to have a wine before Christmas!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 19:29:21

Thank you Raah!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 19:31:57

Aw little, that sucks. <passes Schloer and Pringles>

I am on tea <whoop>
HOW is it the last of the auditions? I got bored last week and wandered off - did I miss 60 acts in that half hour or something?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 19:48:32

Sue- we didn't even see half of the acts from Saturday, on the Sunday ARENA show.

I'm hoping the Oldies choir get through. And record 'White Christmas' for Christmas number One. I'd probably not really buy it. grin

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 19:51:26

I knows a spoiler about the Oldies!

Does one of them die?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 19:58:17


littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 19:58:51


No, they get through to bootcamp then decide they should give up their place for one of the younger groups.

The ultimate sacrifice <sniffs>
<salutes gimmers>

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:00:02

Really? Do they decide, or are they forced to do it?sad

cardibach Sat 21-Sep-13 20:00:26

I'm here. Have wine.

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:00:39

They probably thought one would die before the live shows if they were honest!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:04

I think they decide Raah.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:20

Even if the oldies are rubbish, i will resent the whipper snappers who took their placegrin . Just because.

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:26

I don't like Duplo.

Lemonade for me smile

Littlemiss I think you're in same situation as me. My husbands been gone since July

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:52

Er.... Can someone tell them that Duplex does not mean double?

cardibach Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:59

These two are most annoying!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:01:59


Bit of a bugger living to 94, and dying on the X factor stagegrin

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:08

Are they Mnet scarves?

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:09

These two piss me off already!

Shuuuttttttt uuuuuuuupppppp!

Doesn't Duplex mean two storey?

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:43

They sound so contrived. I hope they're great singers so I can dislike them every week.

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:49

Shut uuuuuuuup

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:53

These two are really awful.

Pagwatch Sat 21-Sep-13 20:02:57


Omg! Litrally!

Pagwatch Sat 21-Sep-13 20:03:28

Nope. Not good singers.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:03:34

More like Bungalow. Nothing upstairs

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:03:47

Aww Northener. Mine has gone to play with the penguins so is relatively safe, but he hates it down there.

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:03:52

Omg Paggy, shut uuuuuuup

Bet it sounded GREAT in their bedrooms.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:04:05

The scarves don't help.

Go Gary!

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:04:43

Duplex. No on both sides.

Pagwatch Sat 21-Sep-13 20:05:14

Omg . They were just like...

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:05:44

He's a butler?

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 21-Sep-13 20:05:48

Joseph Whelan is on tonight! Yum yum yum!!! grin

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:00

Chicken little sonata .... Nice

Pagwatch Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:04

Oh bless him!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:11

Did he leave his personality at home?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:45


littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:51

OMFG! is he deaf?

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:06:52

I NEED that that buckle

Jakers but this series is tedious.

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:07:33

The buckle is ace!


Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:07:49

Thing is, I think Pete really, really wanted this. He must have a dead nanna or something.

It's Gok!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:08:01

grin he doesn't even know his name!

Where do they find these people?

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:08:41

My favourite maths is about numbers. No shit Sherlock.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:09:55

Why is Whitney being resurrected this series?

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:10:24

Have the judges perfected the 'surprised' look for the camera?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:10:31

Sue- I'm with you .

Phif! Phif!

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 21-Sep-13 20:10:37

Wow even Gary has cracked his face

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:10:49

My favourite maths is about numbers. No shit Sherlock.

That probably reflects more on your understanding of maths than his. I like him even more now.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:10:57


yes- it's called 'Doing a Susan Boyle'

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:11:12

Is shitslinger on the vodka

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:12:13

I bet that lipstick is still on his face!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:12:17

Shazza didn't get a flower. She's pissed.

I don't get peoples obsessions with Nicole.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:13:13

Well she's always pissed Raah, doubt if she was compus mentus enough to notice a flower or lack thereof.... grin

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:13:16

What's going on with Sharon's hair? It's very 1980's.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:13:16

I'm late- I've been watching though, but busy arguing on another thread that MN needs to recognise the goodegginess of Alistair Appleton.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:14:22

Justin aw

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:14:39

SayCool- true wine

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:15:25

A nice bit of Mickey Bubbles in the ad break

Advertising Icelandgrin

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:15:37

I luffs Alastair Appleton BOF.

Mickey Bubbles advertising Iceland? Did he win the jungle thing and nobody noticed?

The Wang O'Meter has perked right up at Sam.

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:18:09

Sam goes through on looks and personality.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:18:14

Sue -grin

'You're beautiful' is the kiss of death X Factor song.

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:18:32

He's got nice eyes.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:18:33

Mummy looks scary.

He is cute

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:19:10

Paul- there are 4000 at the ARENA.

That enough?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:19:33

I do love that song, Paul.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:20:12

4000 people


TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:20:16

What if a couple don't turn up? He'll nail it if there's only 3,998.

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:20:25

He moaned it was a fix last year!

Ezio Sat 21-Sep-13 20:20:27

About bloody time, come on Joseph.

I wonder if they actually do remember these people

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:21:32

They don't really know who he is.

No. Do not let the kid in.


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:21:40

Aw Dermie......

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 21-Sep-13 20:21:47

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Joseph!!!

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:21:48

What if they say no?

Scarred for LIFE

Jesus, they're cloning Olly Murs in minion form

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:12

Oh GOD what if he's shit?

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:19

OH NO!!!!!!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:28

They ain't gonna say no Honey, 'tis a fix!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:43


I hate Bon Jovi

and this ain't great.

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:49

Ooh, he's a bit flat in places.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:22:57

Oh dear, no chance

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:23:02

Olly Murrs minion <<dies>> grin

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:23:03

Even the kid thinks he stinks sad

Keep him away from Shazza's glass.
Daddy's crap BTW.

Karaoke! He's decent though

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:23:17

Ooooh I would!blush

LittleTulip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:23:25


He's a bit shit, but I have a sudden need to dig out my Bon Jovi tapes <having a 1994 moment>

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:23:42

Ooh, shouty, screechy, forced.



WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:24:00

He did get better at the end there. He's got something, I reckon.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:24:04

This is painful. He needs to suck on a Fisherman's Friend.

Ezio Sat 21-Sep-13 20:24:05

Ugh you bloody heathens saying hes crap, better than most the shit they trot out.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:24:20

Are they drugging the judges?



Four yes's? hmm

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:25:18

Ezio being less shit than a lot of shit isn't a great score on the Shitometer though.

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:25:38

Sadly, I don't need to dig out my tapes as Bon JOvi is on in this house ALL THE TIME.

We are not cool.

I don't care.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:25:50

Well, if he thought it was fixed last year, putting him through on the basis of that, proves it really.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:26:09

Ezio, he's no Ezio, put it that way. It's acceptable to rasp through a song after a two-hour gig, but not immediately.

Who's got the trots?

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:26:31

It is bad enough that I am sat on a blue leather chair without Sharon wearing it

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 21-Sep-13 20:26:49

I welled up when the Kian said he was proud of Daddy! hmm

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:27:55

Me Sue!blush
<chucks cold water over self>

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:28:30

I don't like returnees. On principle.

More Buble in the ads! it's Buble week!

cardibach Sat 21-Sep-13 20:28:57

I liked the tone of his voice, actually. Some problems in the upper register/head voice (which is an issue for a rocker) but with the right guidance...

Good Lord above but this thread aint what it used to be grin
We're not supposed to like them, you know.

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:29:37

Oh Fuck, Martine's gone bankrupt. Must buy the Sun tomorrow, not!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:30:20

Sue- I didn't like him. Can I stay?grin

Wtf has Louis done to his eyes then?

What a shit line!

Green Boots! Straight to the top of my list.

Pass me the sick bucket please

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:30:54

Sorry, was that Green Boot???

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:30:58


Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:01

Martine's been bankrupt a while.



These two are GOLD!

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:04

Is there anything more sickening than nerds in love?

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:13

I'm going to spew!

JoS Juniors

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:31

Kill them kill them kill them

VivaLeThrustBadger Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:32

They will be shit.


FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:44

Has she hypnotised him or something

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:51

What's your name?
'we're a couple'

is that an answer?

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:54

Barry better have a shotgun under that desk

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:31:56

My sitting room is dripping in vomit.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:07

I want to <boak>

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:10


InkleWinkle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:14

Littlemiss-there was a thread this week about what happens to celebs when they're 'finished'
I think they're all in The Sun tomorrow.

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:21

I'm actually making sick noises.

I am alone in my house making sick noises.

VivaLeThrustBadger Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:24

Told you.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:28

In hysterics at 'like chocolate in a microwave'

Surprise - they can't sing.

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:41

And now I want to gouge out my own ears.


Well, tbf, he's better than The Malevolent Orange

What's the betting they split them?

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:45


squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:48

Love the pal's reaction! grin

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:48

The friend is pissing himself.

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:48

<rips of ears>

The NOSE! Leave the fucking NOSE out of your voice for the love of Jeffery.

I may have missed it before but I think I've just watched an advert for Iceland without massive platters of party food (and Mr Bubbles in the background).

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:53

I thought love was blind not deaf.

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:55

<rips of ears>

The NOSE! Leave the fucking NOSE out of your voice for the love of Jeffery.

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:32:57

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh my eaaaaaars!

I love that their friend has no words

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:00

He sings like Kermit.

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:03


InkleWinkle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:10

Oh dear.

LittleTulip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:16

I thought they were quite good

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:19

DH is rocking on the sofa saying 'Make it stop'

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:20

Even Dermott is looking shocked!

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:34

It sounded like they were both trapped in a microwave.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:33:44

Another planet.

Thank goodness.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:10

Hoggy grin

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:19

Even Louis said no to the Irish couple!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:21

They will split up on the train home.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:38

Cheeky Girls 2!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:46

Put her out.

She's on fire!

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:51

Sadly no fire

New cheeky girls?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:34:56

My ears are bleeding

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:03

He's massively gay anyway. Beardtastic.

It's the Cheeky Girls II. They've left Cinders at home, a-scrubbing and a-sewing.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:23

Diva Fever!

sailorsgal Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:35

If you really loved someone wouldn't you be kind enough to tell them they couldn't sing. hmm

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:38

grin like a Benetton advert!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:39

Loving the fake microphones

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:40

LOVE the cardis.

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:45

Fake mikes!!


Cheeky Boys?

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:49

Are they giving blowjobs?

MrsSJG Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:52

omg they are bad! grin grin

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:35:59

Fake mikes!!


I thought Diva too, Raah
Your man looked like Alan Cummings in a pastel shorts suit.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:36:16

Oh help

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:36:29

Oh oh oh oh nooooooooooooooooooooo

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:36:34

Ow Ow Ow Ow

If they're all shite, who will be in the ARENA tomorrow?
Early baths all round?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:36:51

Sue Diva Fever were ace.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:37:24

Oh- they make this group split up....

Daisy chain grin
Isn't that shorthand for mutual masturbation in groups?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:37:49

Did they make their outfits from curtains?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:05

Sue - all the acts from last Saturday will be on tomorrow.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:23

Daisychain is rude, isn't it?

I LOVE the red hair though- the exact same shade as dd2's.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:26

Sue shock

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:26

This song used to have a proper tune.

Nice dancing <clicky fingers>

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:42

'If one link is broken we don't work'

I BET you they ask her to go solo and she bites their hand off. Fuck the chain!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:38:52

The hair is gorgeous.

Apart from that...

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:39:05

Oh noooooooo sad

WayHarshTai Sat 21-Sep-13 20:39:07

Saw that coming a fucking mile away.

I knew they'd say that

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:39:08

Daisy chain is urban euphemism? Wow. Every day's a school day.

What's your one on the right doing with her teef?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:39:29

squoosh- that is exactly what happens.grin

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:39:42

Oh I live it when they break them up.

After they say they can never be split.

She'll leave them without a backward glance.

Daisy who?

Usually when they split a friendship group, they send them home at boot camp. Just for the lulz.
Remember Mr 33.3%?

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:40:13

Makes good telly

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:40:23


I like her. She's making it all about her BEAUTIFULLY
Matter of time before one of the other Daisies biffs her I think

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:41:14

I'm really surprised that her friends aren't encouraging her 100%.

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:41:14

She'll have to change her name to Dandelion.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:41:35

Squoosh- I don't have the gift, I read Digital Spygrin

Gwan girl. You nearly summoned tears then.

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 20:41:43

You do, squoosh. But they hardly backed her up, did they? Fuck 'em.

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:41:53

The fact one of them said she couldn't promise it wouldn't spoil their friendship speaks volumes.

Say bye bye to her.........!

FanjoForTheMammaries Sat 21-Sep-13 20:42:02

If I were her I'd be seriously afraid of her red haired ex pal now

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:42:09

She'll get over it. In about 5 minutes smile

Vivacia Sat 21-Sep-13 20:42:17

Quite horrible really. The chance of her going on to success is slim and a year from now she's likely to be two friends down. At least two friends.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:42:22

Sue- I was just trying to remember Mr 33%.

The ones with the hats.

Lucky she's not going through for her acting.
Give me sincerity. No, more. More. More....

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:42:56

I doubt she'll get past bootcamp.

YY, Raah. And they dropped them, cackling madly prolly, once they'd got through boot camp

Some 'friends'!

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:46:13

The Oldies must be coming next.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:48:57

That bun isn't ' doing him any favours

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:49:09

I love this happy little fella. His smile could melt icebergs.

Maryz Sat 21-Sep-13 20:49:24

This is a very bad time of year to give up wine isn't it?

I really need it for some of these.

cardibach Sat 21-Sep-13 20:49:29

Great control already!

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:49:59

Oooooh what a cheeky chappie

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sat 21-Sep-13 20:50:01

Ooh bun or not, I like him

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:50:14


littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:50:21

Wow! I know we aren't meant to like them, but just wow!

Ooh, I like him! grin

LittleTulip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:50:59

Smooooooooth me likey

Ooo, I like him. Even if he does have a hairdo like Mrs Babarpapa (not necessarily a bad thing)

Feck off Bazza, with your 'bad habits'. Coming from the man that let Mark Owen sing..

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:51:59

He needs to ditch the Peru2 do but I can see him winning.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:52:03

The one year the overs get any talent in it- Louis will not get them.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:53:20


What is with the Whitney????

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:53:20

Cease and desist with the fecking Witney FFS!

I like this one too, she does the poo-dip when she sings.
Always good value in the live shows, that.

InkleWinkle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:53:26

It's like they're cramming them in this week after hardly showing any last week

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:54:09

Raah grin

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:54:15

Awww here's the Oldies!

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:54:17

Genius, there's even a walker.

Has Louis ever had anyone win?

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:54:52

They won't last until the final.

<everything crossed for Jerusalem>

squoosh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:55:21

'if we live long enough'


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:55:26

Oh Gary. You're such a joker.

C'mon Jean with her Casio

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:55:45

Louis mentored Shane Ward, iirc.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:55:46

Louis is speaking slowly and loudy! He is the same age as the Nostalgics!

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 21-Sep-13 20:55:59

Shane Ward was Louis's winner!
My friend's audition wasn't shown! sad

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:12



TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:17

Straight to Boot Camp.

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:26

Nostaligics FTW!

I like the one doing the closed-eyes Songs of Praise singing.

Maryz Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:42

Sorry, that isn't a group.

It's a choir. Do they allow choirs?

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:48


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:56:56

You know, with all the buildup from you lot, I was expecting better.

This is the sort of thing I expect at funerals. Probably theirs soon.

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 20:57:02

Bless them!grin

LittleTulip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:57:14

What about Sharon

Bazza is a patronising old gobshite,inne?

HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:57:42

It's not a choir. They've got jean and her Casio

johnworf Sat 21-Sep-13 20:57:44

Louis will vote himself into the group....

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:57:57


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:58:04

But seriously, it is actually cruel to put them through.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 20:58:12

Sharon could be their mother.

Ah I can't even remember what Shane Ward sounded like.

Ohh why yes to these! They're lovely but not right.

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 20:58:26

Sharon can't get up, her face strings are pulled tight behind her chair.

Maybe next year?

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 21-Sep-13 20:58:40

The choir group got through to Judges Houses I think then pulled out!

YY. would a choir have Jean? Or the Casio?
I think not.
Nor would they do that special literal choreography

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 20:59:01


HoneyDragon Sat 21-Sep-13 20:59:08

Are they in an arena tomorrow?

Maryz Sat 21-Sep-13 20:59:17

They probably couldn't get travel insurance to leave the country.

LittleTulip Sat 21-Sep-13 20:59:20

grin TSS

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 21:00:13

Maryz grin

Did anyone see Kezza'z amazing house last week then?
How has she got an amazing house? I thought she'd spent up and had to go to Wonga or something?

I reckon they have <taps nose> visa issues

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 21:00:51

They aren't right for the show are they really?

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 21:01:31

The Chairman of Saga must have done a little dance when their Travel insurance bill got paid.

They'll be no next year for them though, unless they come back as a duet.

HoggyTruffle Sat 21-Sep-13 21:01:44

So TSS, will Sharon appear in the arena in the style of a thunderbird's puppet, dangling from her face strings?

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 21:02:18

I saw it Sue, 'tis rented. Gawd knows how she affords it, mind you she needs the room now she is preggers again.

TSSDNCOP Sat 21-Sep-13 21:02:59

The whole front row grab a string each and heeeeeeave!

Huh <bitter>
Tis well for them who can get Iceland royalties, is all I can say

why didn't the Oldies go on BGT? Saturated market?

Iirc Kerry's house is up for sale and somebody posted the link to it on chat the other week.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 21:05:13

Right, I need a wee.

See you all tomorrow!

littlemisswise Sat 21-Sep-13 21:06:36

Is anyone watching Xtra?

InkleWinkle Sat 21-Sep-13 21:06:48

GerardButler - maybe she'll be in the ARENA tomorrow? They did that last week.

Is it? I don't go anywhere but here so I miss all that
Terry Wogan and presumably his cock is on the keyhole.
I'm v excited. Love Sir Terry.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sat 21-Sep-13 21:08:39

That's a hell of a long wee Raahh....

BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 21:09:37

I'm on Through The Keyhole, just hoping for a glimpse of the todger...

Through the keyhole for me aswell. Much funnier. Need something funny after that

InkleWinkle Sat 21-Sep-13 21:11:05

I think it's under the desk.

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco Sat 21-Sep-13 21:19:00

I am LOVING this trhough the keyhole.

BoF I have never seen 5mins To a Fortune since your house, I think you invented it for me.

I am bereft.

Raahh Sat 21-Sep-13 21:19:45


SoleSource Sat 21-Sep-13 21:22:53

watching now on itv+1

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco Sat 21-Sep-13 21:26:52


Yay I'm so clever <pats self on back>

This is the kind of validation I need in life, getting quiz shows right. It's important.

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco Sat 21-Sep-13 21:27:06

Fuck me I hope that's right.

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco Sat 21-Sep-13 21:27:12


BOF Sat 21-Sep-13 21:30:08

WorldPeace, I've never seen it since either- perhaps we conjured it as a hallucination?

WorldPeaceAndFreeProsecco Sat 21-Sep-13 21:35:22

It's very possible. Dammit.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 19:42:33

Just trying to get the school stuff sorted- before the last of the ARENA shows.

There will be loads at boot camp we won't remember seeing.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 19:56:24

Evening. Can't believe 'tis last of the ARENAs, we've only seen about 40 people!

I've got chocolate, alcohol and a bit of knitting

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 19:59:05

I have finished my wine. I need something else. I can't face this with no support.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 19:59:39

<passes Cardibach a beer>

Sorry, it's all we have.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 19:59:51

little I know!

And my internet is being crap, so I'm stuck on my phone.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 19:59:54

I've got a lurgy and a mailbox that keeps pinging with DH bothering me! I told him I am poorly and am having an early night.blush

I don't drink wine. There's some in my cupboard that the in laws left when they visited. Wasting away in there

Jaysus, but I am not at all convinced this is worth it.
Most.Tedious.Auditions. EVER.

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:00:35

I'm alcohol and chocolate-deprived sad

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:00:45

I ran out of wine, and am having to drink cider. Am not a fansad

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:01:07

Thanks SayCool. I will drink that then move my arse to the kitchen to get some kind of short.

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:01:31

Evening all!

Missed last nights, I was off pretending to have a social life

<settles in>

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:01:38

Bin juice.


SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:01:44

My dad left us a crate of Budweiser. Help yourselves.

Yucky cider. I use it to cook!

Eeee, Brian The Bins is a reet cheeky chappie

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:02:21

You'll all have to come here, I've got shed loads of wine, that I can't drink and a massive bottle of that Jagermeister stuff that I bought DS1 back from hols.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:02:24

Haha, I thought he said 'Im Ryan and I weigh....'

Maryz Sun 22-Sep-13 20:02:46

I've just seen Kevin McCloud's bum shock.

I'm on the wrong station, obviously grin

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:03:00

Nice voice, weird facial expressions. And less good when he gets loud...

Isn't he from last week? I like him either way

HoggyTruffle Sun 22-Sep-13 20:03:07

I wish I was up all night to get some.

wtf is he doing with his face?
He looks like he's being worked by a particularly sadistic puppeteer.

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:03:39

Jagermeister tastes like Benylin, littlemiss. But it'll do at a push.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:03:43

MaryZ grin

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:03:43

Lou lous just not getting it is he?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:04:00

Whoa, Louis looks a bit excited!

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:04:21

Louis is so excited.

He's like a ruddy cheeked David Gray, this one.

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:04:22

I'm up all night to get lucky...

Might want to book a week off love

Well, Brian and his family are responsible for the global shortage of checked shirts atm. They've drained Jacamo DRY.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:04:40

x-post Saygrin

Jeez Nicole's like someone's gran!

HoggyTruffle Sun 22-Sep-13 20:05:06

Squeeze his cheeks. Later Shitsinger.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:05:42


HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:05:47

sad I'm stuck with a non sleeping three year old.

Could all her Mnet XFactor Aunties just communally yell


so Minidragon takes the hint please?

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:06:15

It's a man in a kilt

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:06:27

Have we seen these?

HoggyTruffle Sun 22-Sep-13 20:06:32

Jagermeister is made from bin juice. Fact.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:06:37

I don't remember theseconfused

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:06:38

WHy haven't we seen these before?

Who are this shower? They look like they've wandered in from the pub.
Too much hair. Too much Fat Hobbit about the look in general.
I'm with Shazza.

Sharon the queen of rock? Erm no.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:07:16

Gah, I can't post

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:07:40

Honey I am shouting for you! We had that earlier. Bloody DD wouldn't go down.

Why are we seeing people we haven't seen audition?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:07:53

Oh, I can.

I liked Ryan the binman. Why is one of these men wearing a skirt?

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:15

I fucking hate that air-patting that groups do.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:19

Why are they all singing Whitney / Bon jovi stuff.

Has Adele said 'no' this year?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:39

YY to Fat Hobbit. And Louis looks a tit

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:43

Bon Jovi revival weekend......

They're shit, they're just relying on the song.

HoggyTruffle Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:50

Too much nose wrinkling and shouting.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:51

Christ, we'll see what Nicole had for breakfast in a minute!

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:08:52

Someone is off key, and very shouty.

Why do people do that? That special nose wrinkle when they think they're being rock-y? See also the lower lip jut.

I like them though, for their crapness. What do you think to Ill Divos?

MrsBramleyApple Sun 22-Sep-13 20:09:38

Not impressed with this lot at all!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:09:42

Louis loves it when they start slow.... And build it up.....

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:09:50

I like these, just cos he said Wrong Direction grin

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:09:55

Look like rock stars? They look like distilled sweat.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:10:05

But....but but they were all shouty!

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:10:44

How the fuck big is the Boot camp this year? We could be weeks at the judges pretend gaffs.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:10:50

How many people auditioned? Cause I reckon we've seen about fifty, maximum.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:10:56

But, yes, Noel- 10 out of 10 for the Wrong Direction quipgrin

WTF was the guy in the kilts doing the splits?

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:11:33

Saycool thanks. Bit of sick in my mouth now.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:12:39

I hope he was wearing pants <prude>


and I can no longer post [tennis][tennis] and get balls got MNHQ has pinched 'emsad

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:13:35


littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:13:49

I used to be able to do the splits, my hips don't thank me now! <old glimmer>

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:13:59

Aww, I love the Aldi peas ad.Sounds just like dd2.

'No, no thank you' bless.

MissStrawberry Sun 22-Sep-13 20:14:38

Bummer at spoiler at top of the thread.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:15:14

I got excited at the Walkers ad, thinking the tractor driving was a precursor to a Yeo Valley ad sad

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:15:46

Oh,it's the 'One with no friends'

Eh? spoiler?

It's the Daisy One. Daisy No Mates.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:16:14

Hmmmm her two cohorts are conspicuously absent.....

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:16:37

Is she now 'Daisy' or 'Chain'

Best friends but haven't spoken. Bit shit that

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:17:00

Oh dear..... confused

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:17:11

Bad start.

MrsBramleyApple Sun 22-Sep-13 20:17:25

She was flat as hell at the beginning! Not impressed at all!

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:17:30

She was shit at the start of this, but is warming up

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:17:44

Shitsinger doing the angsty 'don't know who you are' face.

Some 'friends' they were.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sun 22-Sep-13 20:18:05

She was good.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:18:07

Bless her she looked really vulnerable

I sure hope she's got a dead SOMETHING.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:18:49

'pinky promise'

oh gawd.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:19:01

Pinky promise?

Oh God.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sun 22-Sep-13 20:19:19

She must feel a bit shit though. Every man for himself.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:19:28

Sue me too. grin

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:19:34

We bunch of old vipers know. She'll get more friends.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:09

x post SayCool
we are pinky twins tonightgrin

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:16

These were good until they started singing.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:17

Too cocky

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:17

Babyshit trews alert!

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:17

No for gawds sake, no one yell. I've got the bugger unconscious.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:20

Babyshit trews alert!

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:44

I don't remember these either.

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:20:47

They were horribly flat.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:21:02

Fuck me, why I am posting twice or not at all?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:21:34

No more pain..... Please stop singing!

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:22:16

Have we seen these? confused

Cor, but aren't they all a bunch of gawdhelpus nohopers this year?
It's embarrassing really.

And why is MN being crap?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:22:33

Christ, with the staged kids talk....

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:22:37

Awww, cute little girl.

slaps self

Doing it for the kid.


BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:22:46

Does Peppa Pig sing?

Louis 'why are you here today?'

Bless him. he's getting on.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:23:23

I like this lot

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:23:38

She is better than Peppa Pig

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:23:44

How did they get through, without telling the woman to go solo?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:23:46

Sue grin

She has a great voice - the others suck.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:23:50

Looks like I am the only one

Oh dear. I smell a 33.3% moment coming on.

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:24:10

Well, that was noise really, wasn't it?

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:24:15

Sounds like the B-52's does Black Eyed Peas

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:24:35

I hate that sort of crap music.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:24:50

Sue- they have save the 'ditch your mates' moment for the ARENA!!!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:24:58

Noel grin

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:23

Is it Drama Llama week?

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:32

Oh for fucks sake..,,.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:35

Fair play to her

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:46

Interesting euphemisms going on: "lacking chemistry"= "you aren't black enough".

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:53

No no no don't make the wee girl watch her mam crying her eyes out ffs

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:25:57

The others will tell her to ditch them.And be the good guys. or summat.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:26:06

She needs to visit the bra threads on here!

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:26:19

Gary's thinking 'Ill break them up later.....'

Boffles grin

cardibach Sun 22-Sep-13 20:26:38

I don't like her either. TOo shouty. Ditch them all as none of them will make it.

Good on her!

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:26:43

But- the blokes were not good at all.

HoggyTruffle Sun 22-Sep-13 20:27:17

Will they have another go later to split them up for more drama?

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:27:24

You've got to like her integrity for sticking with her friends. Unlike Daisy we can't never be broken Chain girl.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:28:05

Boot Camp will be interesting...

And yes to the bra intervention

crypes Sun 22-Sep-13 20:31:34

Yes those guys with her couldn't concentrate on their singing with that booby bra.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:31:56

Oh Chadsad

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:31:59


littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:32:00

Another one we haven't seen before!

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:32:50

Shitty is happy with Sam.

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:33:04

He looks a little constipated though....

MrsBramleyApple Sun 22-Sep-13 20:33:28

I haven't seen half of these before!!

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:33:37

It's hipster chick...

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:33:46

Zoe will be singing 'At Last' by bootcamp.

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:34:06

Perhaps they do a special show they're hiding from us?

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:34:28

Ah, the shrieker. Didn't like him.

HoneyDragon Sun 22-Sep-13 20:34:34

Do we all still fancy him?

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:34:56

Honey - yes, they must be hiding something. Bastards.

Oh I like this Joseph. Didn't pay enough attention to him last night

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:35:12

Bless him with his little guitar for decoration.

So Bon Jovi, then Guns n roses.
He can do Metallica in boot camp, Nirvana in judges houses and finish with one crack at the Smashing Pumpkins in the lives.
Then he'll run out of songs and have to go home.

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:35:40

Where have they been hiding all these?

LittleTulip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:35:41

I'm bored of this now where the bun guy

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:35:45

Honestly that Joseph is a no. He's got no range beyond SHOUT.

Have I missed loads of auditions? There's hardly anyone here tonight I remember from The Room.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:35:47

I didn't like him. Very karaoke rock, imo. But everyone else will love him. And he has a son and everything.

MrsBramleyApple Sun 22-Sep-13 20:36:01

I luff Joseph!!!

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sun 22-Sep-13 20:36:11

Do people really gave someone singing as they're walking down the aisle? Blimey.

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:36:13

Can Lauren Laverne sing? Did we see her before?

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:36:51

See, Wedding Singer makes me think of
'it's alllllllll bullshit'

Interesting tunehmm

That's a cracking camel toe.
Do we think she wears that to the weddings?

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:37:18

Clever interpretation. Like her.

BOF Sun 22-Sep-13 20:37:30

That is some seriously nasal singing.

Sorry love, the shorts aren't working for me. Although you could be working in them, iykwim?

Why do they do this? If you don't like the melody of , you know, the actual FRIFFING SONG, then pick another.
This is just rude.

NoelHeadbands Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:08

Sue grin

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:16

Did Nicole get all emosh or blow off just then?

MrsBramleyApple Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:20

Chrissie was AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

littlemisswise Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:27

It's a bit Jane McDonald imo

CuthbertDibble Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:33

Ooh, she sings in our local pub!

What's going to happen to the poor brides who've booked her?
I can imagine the FB status telling them all to get tae fuck

LittleTulip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:48

Ok un-bored she was quite good

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:55

John lewis ad tune, 2014.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sun 22-Sep-13 20:38:57


She's so pretty.

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:40:14

Where are the Pensioners?

Oh no, Raah, I LOVE the JL ads <soppy eejit>
i do not love her in the net curtain/shortshorts.

DameEdnasBridesmaid Sun 22-Sep-13 20:40:22

It was definately better than Candi Statton's version. I can't stand that

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:41:28

Raah - yes!

'She's like a little Ellie Goulding'

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:41:36

Nooooo! The Candi Statton version has a tune and everything! That was dreary- sure, she can sing, but I didn't like what she did to the song.

TSSDNCOP Sun 22-Sep-13 20:42:40

There's going to be a shed load of pissed of Bridezillas on AIBU if she gets through to the live shows.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sun 22-Sep-13 20:42:51

Mercutio in drag is the best version

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:42:51

I still haven't forgiven Gabrielle Aplin for the 'Power of Love' dirge she inflicted on the snowmen.

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:44:16

I did like the Smiths cover though. Or maybe it was just because that advert was amazing.....

God I hope boot camp picks up next week.

Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:44:37

My favourite wedding singer song


Raahh Sun 22-Sep-13 20:45:43

Say-<whispers, in case Smiths fans are listening>

I liked that version too.grin And the ad was brilliant. Almost made me wish Istill worked there. Nearlygrin

SayCoolNowSayWhip Sun 22-Sep-13 20:46:03

Aw it's Gi-Gi..... hmm

Ahh Jiles is back smile