The Voice!- it's dope! it's fresh! and **WARNING **it's on LATER tonight....8.20PM

(402 Posts)
Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 15:57:45

Presumably to avoid a clash with BGT.

And this week the woman who all 'nervous' on BGT last week, is on The Voice this week (it was recorded earlier). Looking a lot less nervous. grin

madhairday Sat 20-Apr-13 16:12:18

So annoyed they've changed it and put the bloody National Lottery on between Dr who and The Voice. Means it will run too late for the dc to be up really. Don't want to watch Britain's Not Got bloody Talent anyway.

<cross> can you tell?

madhairday Sat 20-Apr-13 16:12:56

<waves to Raahh> haven't I met you somewhere before? <channels tbfe>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 16:13:01

too many 'weeks' in that post, sorry!

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 16:13:48

ooh, Mad- we may have met before.... grin

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 16:15:28

Must admit, i don't like BGT either- and I can't watch Doctor Who, because dh is on nights, so I will watch it with him tomorrow.

At least I don't have to pack the kids off to bed at 7 o'clockgrin

So nervous she went on two national talent shows? With annoying fey mannerisms? Faux-fey, if you will? That nervous? Gosh,that must be a huge disadvantage.

8.20 is more convenient for bedtimes

She's like Fake Shakes Maloney. Oi, Boffles? We need a similarly offensive NN for her please and thanks.

I have just goggled and seen a pic of her Voice audition <does gawp face>
Nervous like a FOX.

<Raah and I obvs only posting in groups of three tonight> grin

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 17:48:59

I will do my best, Su grin

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 17:50:05

What's the nervous woman's name so I can look her up? I dont remember her at all.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 17:53:16

Funnily enough on the DMSBOS- one of the comments refers to FakeAlice as 'doing a Maloney' since of course he pulled the same stunt of being all nervous.

I don't think we need worry about a nn for her in 'The Voice', however. grin
maybe just for BGT--which I don't watch-- smile

mum2jakie Sat 20-Apr-13 17:53:34

Is it Alice Fredenham - I loved her on BGT- or do you mean somebody else entirely?

Alice Fredenham

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 17:54:18

Alice Fredenham, Bof.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 17:54:30

x-postgrin

I think the nickname issue works on a want not need basis anyway, Raah grin.
It'll be short lived though, which for Bof's NNs is prolly a blessing <that's someone's MOTHER/CHILD/SISTER/BEAUTICIAN you caahs>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 18:04:04

grin true!

Beautician <arf>

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 18:41:29

I'm not even watching BGT this year, BGT is dead to me.

¥¥¥ Please ignore this post when I try to join in the BGT threads in probably 2 weeks time ¥¥¥

I am knacked tonight because get this-

I WAS AT THE WANDIES CONCERT LAST NIGHT

My 12yo owes me big time

Crutchlow35 Sat 20-Apr-13 18:50:18

Oh she is such a fake.

You saw the Wand Erections? Were they well? Was Louis there?
my 6yo insists Harry is called Happy. tbf he does look happy vacant

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 19:42:21

I can confirm that in the flesh, Harry looks very tall, very pleased with himself and slightly bored. But the others are like Labrador puppies with two dicks and all in all it was a jolly good show.

Harry is defying medical science by being the only functioning human with a lower IQ than Jedward.

Also too late for DD here - which may be a good thing as pregnant with DC2 and DD wants to call him will.i.am if a DS. Not william you understand will.i.am!hmm

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:12:11

Evening folks. Hope there are some real stinkers on tonight. I need a laugh.

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:20:49

I'm here <despairs at self>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:21:46

Here comes FakeAlice

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:22:07

I have vest like that. I usually wear a top over it though <gimmer>

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:22:21

Oooh, it's a quite different vibe from the youtube clip I went and stalked her on 10 mins ago because of you lot!

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:22:51

Her confidence has grown loads in the last few weeks, alledgedly.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:22:52

Is it wrong that I've looked forward to this all week day?

She is a beauty therapist, Sue. Do you know her? Does she
therapise you all vintagey?

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:23:40

I wonder if she realised her appearances on Voice/BGT would be a week apart. Very unfortunate.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:24:25

Her bum cheeks look odd hmm

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:24:37

You know who she reminds me of??

Menlove.

I don't need her kind of therapy, ta.
And I do vintage MUCH better than her <sniffs>

Nice pelvic thrusts there, shy girl

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:25:39

Her skirt is reminiscent of black leggings that are over stretched.

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:25:42

Here, BGT, gigs all over London.

Yet, she's shy...

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:26:31

I'm late to the party, is this the BGT woman then??

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:26:47

Showy off, showy off, pick your nose and blow it off <childish>

YY to La Menlove.
Faux vintage and grabby grabby sharp elbows.

lisad123everybodydancenow Sat 20-Apr-13 20:27:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:27:34

I bet she has a squee-Apron (or whatever it was called).

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:27:48

Nice wet look perm here.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:27:56

Why does Jessie always assume they want to met her?

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:28:07

Yay Danny, 'sleazy' endears thee to most women you'll find. Arse.

Do you remember when Jenifer aniston has that skirt in friends? the one where he comes back with a girlfriend.
We all hacked at our maxi skirts and bared our knobbly knees grin

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:28:52

oh she's doing warbly bits. Jessie likes warby bits.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:29:00

Warbly Mariah wannabe.

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:29:13

I hate that wobbly singing. Just looks like they can't hold a note.

lisa, yes. But the judges on BGT are even bigger gobshites than this shower. grin

idiot55 Sat 20-Apr-13 20:29:34

Im not overly keen on this one, whats her name, on after Alice , too screechy for me.

( as if I I know anything about it!)

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:29:36

Dagnammit, I missed the start because of bloody BGT angry

Hey if the 1980's ever need their singer back, they know where to look now.

Love her though.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:29:42

Yikes shock my eardrum has just burst

LottieJenkins Sat 20-Apr-13 20:30:18

She sounds like either Denise Williams or Stevie Wonders ex wife Syreeta!!

Heavywheezing Sat 20-Apr-13 20:30:33

I thought she'd be shit, she wasn't

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:30:38

She did warbling,S'Tom. It wasn't original.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:30:49

Hello ladies - have missed two weeks of this! Did anything happen?

I used to be Louis Walsh, btw.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:30:57

The warbly stuff is just boring.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:31:16

Hello all.

[sneaks onto thread]

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:31:22

Nope
You've missing nuffing.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:31:26

And I should add that that is because I'm stoned, for the first time in twenty years. I was grouching to my brother about not being able to drink on my antibiotics, and he decided it would be a good idea to bring me a spliff.

Bet you all ONE POUND that they get her doing the Loving Yoooooo song. You know, the lalallallala one that only dogs can hear?

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 20:31:51

if she says 'as a female' one more time. ..angry

STONED? <reports to Police>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:05

Lottie- Syreeta's version of 'The beatles- she's leaving home' is on of my favourite ever covers.

Bored of jessie being 'female'.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:08

It might make sense to you more BOF.

YY 'as a female' I think she's a silly cunt.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:28

Oh, Danny. Tsk.

If you're not as well-conneced to 'sleb goss as I am ie you don't get the popbitch mailout, you may have missed this gem:

A Popbitch reader spotted Danny at LAX airport on Saturday. Her 16 year old daughter is a massive fan of The Script, but was too shy to ask Danny for a picture, afraid that he would be annoyed at people approaching him in public. So she retreated to the toilet.

When she returned, Danny sauntered over to her and asked if she'd mind having her picture taken with him. The girl was stunned, but chuffed - not knowing that her parents had approached Danny while she was in the loo, and Danny was only too happy to play along.

Yes people. Danny's desperate friend search has gone inter-continental.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:33

Christ Boffy's going to love everything

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:39

And I'm being slow because I can't type anymore.

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:40

I actually love will.i.am a little bit

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:41

BOF - I've got cheesy wotsits, popcorn & coke should you be in need of nibbles

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:32:48

Sue! I just started to type that!

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:33:21

Hazel grin

That is tragic

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:33:39

Danny really is a prick constantly going on about their looks its the fucking voice you misogynistic prick.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:33:58

I love slick willie loads and Im not ashamed to admit it.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:34:06

Oh, ffs.

I wish I was stoned not just tipsy oncheap cider sad

cocole, not for the first time we are ONE MIND

ROAR at Danny O'Dodgems stalking teenagers at airports. i reckon he has fakey business cards pretending to be a model agency scout or a chocolate tester recruiter.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:34:53

brew

^ That's my mug with a spliff sign on it.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:34:54

18 and then some hmm

SuffolkNWhat Sat 20-Apr-13 20:34:55

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:35:05

Has she got the hiccups??

Hear that? It's Jarvis gnashing his teeth to NUBBINS

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:35:19

Is there something wrong with singing in a normal voice now?

Is she yodelling?

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:35:28

turn danny, turn, it's your own little yodelling leprechaun

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:35:42

I like that kind of yodelling voice.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:35:48

Spoonful o' vinegar love.. Or drink a glass of water backwards

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:06

Oh. Maybe not.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:09

I love this too.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:10

I really love Will's humour.

They liked her till she tempo. What went wrong?

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:15

Bill.je.suis knows she is rubbish.

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:17

ROAR at little yodelling leprechaun

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:23

I wonder if she's knows any lonely goatherds

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:25

And I love her.

VivaLeBeaver Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:43

I really liked her.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:36:44

Billy- noooooo!

EIGHTEEN?

Bloody hell. She looks like a mum in an ASDA advert

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:37:19

I agree with S'Tom.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:37:25

Her dad(?) looks like Tony form Hollyoaks. Trufact.

Redcliff Sat 20-Apr-13 20:37:32

How did only Will turn around - she was great.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:37:32

Liked her slow bit better.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:37:47

Well, Danny has one thing right...he is an idiot. But right not to turn around as she is dreadful

O'Dodgems bangs ON about singing and playing guitar being so hard. Maybe he should go back to the fair? If he's struggling?

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:06

Why does he make out like singing and playing guitar are sooo hard?? People have been doing it for years before he invented it

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:18

My kids are driving me up the freaking wall.

And when I tell DS off, he gets all huffy

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:20

It WAS executed. You executed poor Jarvis' song.
It is now dead.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:21

Lol at lonely goatherd

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:25

I loved the fast bit.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:32

Fresh, and super-dope.

i love Billy

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:38:44

Super dope, like what BOF is puffing.

Oh oh oh BOFFLES, I have a funny!

YOU are dope! Geddit? DOPE. <dies at self>

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:39:04

Hollyoaks Tony in a Xmas jumper.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:39:05

Dope - does that mean cool now?

COCOLE! We did it again <spooky>

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:39:43

OMG! You two are as one again.

Mme L <waves>
Did you tire of BGT?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:39:54

I love Bill. E. Bollocks too

I smell double denim potential.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:40:18

I don't know anything.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:40:21

Serious faces please people

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:40:34

<twilight zone music>

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:40:42

I want him to sing Reef - Place your hands.

score for the DD <happy>

Heavywheezing Sat 20-Apr-13 20:41:11

Bof, you could have a smoke everytime wi.i.am says fresh
My predictor game would be you prob not make it to the end of the show

He will sing that ginger fecker, the one who writes inappropriate stuff for the Wandies.

Wellthen Sat 20-Apr-13 20:41:34

Loved the last girl, I adore that kind of singing and think its a completely natural talent that you can fake, like people who have country and western voices.

Is there any point watching the next one, he'll obviously get through after that build up.

Wellthen Sat 20-Apr-13 20:41:47

cant fake even

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:41:54

Jessie looks like dd2 when she is constipated.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:42:17

Sue
I got all pofaced about BGT last week, cause they were so nasty and humiliating folk. I just don't enjoy it any more.

Not everyone gets through on The Voice, but they don't let those who are totally crap in front of the nation.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 20:42:28

sad

He has a stool, he should be singing WestShoite.
Though how could he clutch the air when playing?

Wellthen Sat 20-Apr-13 20:42:40

I stand corrected.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:42:44

Arf at heavywheezing telling BOF to smoke more.

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:42:56

boo hoo sad poor little thing

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:43:01

Two words mate- song choice.

YY Mme L. Imagine, La Holden being part of some bitching <shock>

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:43:36

sad bad song choice.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:44:16

Why do this?

They aren't going to put him through sad

Jessie has been watching XF. It's Mingeheads 'hve you another song?' set-up.
He likes shite music, this one. I shall call him Double Denim Jesus.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:44:34

Are they allowed to change their minds

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:44:36

I missed the first week but the girl who was nearly blind is aparently the neice of some hideous C&W singer from over here. Might be Philomena Begley.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:44:53

Mme- I can't watch BGT- people moan about the X factor exploiting people, and then BGT has little kids on, being made fools of. It's just horrible- but family friendly innit. Hate it.

Eh?? They are giving him another go?But this is The Voice- no second chances!!

<knocks politely> Newcomer to thread here.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:45:09

Don't think so mme.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:45:28

Look at you two being as one with jj "song choice".

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:45:31

Exactly, Sue.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:46:05

Hello Sparkling.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:46:11

Wanting to impress Danny is not a good tactic, surely

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:46:15

Sparkling -fancy seeing you, on a crap telly thread!

A Script Song? Big choice of three there mate

Unless you go with his earlier hits 'Roll up, two ferrer pahd everyones a winner'

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:46:49

I know Coco - me and JJ, we're like that <does crossy finger thing>

Hi all. That Jason Donovan man just murdered Footloose. sad I have come over from BGT which was crapola. sad

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:47:07

Welcome Sparkling

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:47:49

rahhh I feel exactly the same about BGT feels so uncomfortable watching kids being buzzed or falling apart on stage.
If someone is really good them I watch it on YouTube.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:47:50

Aaaahhh make it stop

Hi. Do I need to know anything?

Jason D, it WAS his exact outfit. The video where he's playing the electric guitar on the cliff - too many broken hearts? Plenty good denim.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:48:28

What a waste, when they sing the song of a judge.

Your man looks smug already

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:48:55

We all hate jessie, gyspy boy isnt popular either and I would do Will in a heartbeat.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:49:13

Aww, look at S'Tom's face light up then!

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:49:17

Hi sparkling* half the entertainment is bitching about the Judges. grin

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:49:35

I cant hear this DD is doing her Tom jones impression over it.

Why do they all pull that face? That digging-dog-shit-from-your-instep-with-a-twig face?

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:49:56

But he's not Welsh

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:50:23

Why is nobody turning round, hes great.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:50:23

PMSL I love how Toms nose twitches like he's a bunny. grin

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:51:09

He looks purdy

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:51:10

Danny has many mates among the homeless. He pays them in soup.

Wellthen Sat 20-Apr-13 20:51:17

Why is Jessie the sort of presenter, has that always been the case that she talks all the time first?

Jessie's hair is very shiny (not any more obvs). Him off the Script is quite easy on the eye.

She's like a little Dawn French

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:51:59

I like this guy. Giving Jessie backchat.

Oh, and here goes Will.

That Brummie just called JJ 'bab'. grin

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:52:08

Jessie just hates not being the centre of attention

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:52:13

Get her telt - silly cow

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:52:58

Dope? Joint? He knows BOF. Hide the evidence.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:53:23

I've just read Sue's bit on the hits of The Script. I am HOWLING grin. I'm not sure I can take her jokes stoned.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:53:30

I like this guy good looking, smooth voice and just shut JJ down the whole Voice package!

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:53:34

Tom jones with a little ear scratch there. He's thinking "fuuuuuck what have I done?"

BOF, I think I'm only funny to the chemically enhanced

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:54:28

Quick- Danny needs friends acts....

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:54:55

Mothers? Grannies more like.

Christ, the Corrs have aged badly.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:00

Double leather.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:05

oh those jackets are hideous

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:12

This looks like an online bingo advert.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:20

Strange outfits.

ommmward Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:30

Oh beautiful ladies. I really love a classy mature woman

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:39

Ooh yay matching outfits. grin

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:41

grin at the Corrs!

flower duet grin

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:55:54

Shes from Newry, the telly annoucer told us before it started.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:03

nice voices

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:10

Thank god they can't see those godawful jackets- they'd ship them back to be greencoats at Pontins.

have I put BGT back on? confused

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:37

Ok. Who will they go with? Jessie know diddly about classical stuff.

Bet S'Tom has met Katherine Jenkins.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:38

Outfits kinda making more sense now...

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:42

Well, this is the best for me tonight so far. And I liked the blonde footloose lad. Shame he didn't sing his second song

Growlithe Sat 20-Apr-13 20:56:53

BA advert. Hate BA.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 20:57:29

Tbf, JJ knows bog all about anything

S'Toma is the man for they. He'll have them in pleather, straddling bikes and singing Opera Lite. LesMis praps.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:57:39

I can't wait for Rock Week now.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:57:52

That was nice but wtf would you do with them apart from opera stuff.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:58:08

Youre- truegrin

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 20:58:09

What would the coaches do with them though?

YY, Bill-Je-Suis, they should be edumacating The Yoof.
Perhaps they could sing the alphabet?

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 20:59:16

Rock week= the Jim Steinman song book.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 20:59:19

Sue- like on Sesame Street? That might work. grin

As a woman...

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 20:59:46

Love the jacket quip.

ROAR at Danny clapping and nose-honking like a demented seal

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:15

I'm waiting for the big reveal- where we find out jessie is in fact a

dude

mum47 Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:18

Just found this thread. Am only just still watching this programme because I miss most the acts due to DH and I shouting obscenities at JJ.

I did however love the girl who did Pulp. She gave me goosebumps.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:31

Wow. That was a brave decision.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:34

How good would it be if Bill.yo.soy did match jackets with them?
He would have epaulettes on his, of course.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:40

Somehow I believe Will would match his jackets each week. Choose Tom for our sake!

Bill-He-Be is tweeting less this year, have you noticed?
Course now he's on itunes ordering Now That's What We Call Opera

Heavywheezing Sat 20-Apr-13 21:00:46

Love to see what will does with these.
Matching jackets for everyone!

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:01:02

I am really looking forward to seeing what he gets them to sing!

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:01:40

Mum47
DH and I are always shouting at Jessie

He's failed in the rule of tribute acts - the comedy name. you can't just be 'a tribute to'. You have to be Tom Bones or summat

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:01:52

Willy will be far more innovative with how to use opera in a modern way than the others. Good choice.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:01:58

Sue- I'm sure he''ll be tweeting during the live shows. If they haven't confiscated his phonegrin

No, Murdering of Bowie. sad

David Brent mansplainsings Bowie

Only Bowie allowed to sing Bowie. angry

Boffles, how has dope made you MORE serious?

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:02:50

Strange diction.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:02:53

butlins

snice Sat 20-Apr-13 21:02:57

MAKE HIM STOP

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:02:59

grin x 300 at Sue

ClaraOswald Sat 20-Apr-13 21:02:59

Too cabaret.

Pub singer.

hurricanewyn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:27

Danny can't seem to keep his eyes open and listen at the same time. Maybe that's why he thinks playing guitar & singing at the same time is so hard?

snice Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:37

I'VE NEVER MET THIS MAN YET I HATE HIM

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:40

I'm having to concentrate too hard.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:48

This couldn't be more cruise ship if he had seven restaurants and a foghorn

FuckOffMrBloom Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:49

Oh dear. I love this song. But not in the Karaoke style.

Sadface

Goatee beards always make me think of bad oral sex. I don't know why. I expect it'll all come out in therapy one day.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:03:59

ooh-he looks cross

I liked your serious comments grin

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:04:22

Hurricane grin

<arf> Noel

PRIMED. PRIMED I TELLS YA

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:04:57

noo don't let him sing tj

Cringe!

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:10

That must feel so odd. To see someone 'do' you badly.

Growlithe Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:20

God he talks cabaret.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:22

Oh he's a bit of an odd one.

GWAN do Delilah. But do it offstage.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:23

STOP .

MAKE IT STOP

FuckOffMrBloom Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:35

No no no no just stop.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:41

He is shit at Tom Jones as well

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:46

In the club style...........<thank you Shooting Stars>

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:05:53

Love a good pub singer

<hides behind sofa>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:06:09

What's with letting them sing twice?angry

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:06:16

Why are they standing up? To run him off stage?

Just fuck off now, mate

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:00

<helpless>

EEH BAH GUM

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:03

YES! Thank you Springy - I couldn't work out what it reminded me of!

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:05

Now translating 'eee ba gum' for German DH

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:09

There is always one each week that makes you cringe so much you need to take shelter up your back side for safety.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:14

Billy.goat.gruff hasn't the foggiest what is going on.grin

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:15

I feel like a chicken in a basket all of a sudden.

LottieJenkins Sat 20-Apr-13 21:07:16

He has just ruined my favourite song..................hmm angry

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:08:02

ooh- a wedding singer. Cabaret/Karaoke a-go-go, then.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:08:33

This one's been watching FakeAlice

He were raht good. Proper good, that.

Another shy miss on the tellybox. Funny how they keep finding themselves on prime telly innit?

She's vair pretty.

FuckOffMrBloom Sat 20-Apr-13 21:09:07

She's going to keep listing to the left with that hair.

Tesco Mary wants her cardi back

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:09:30

Oh, they shouldn't let people who will cry if they lose be on this. It's too sad.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:09:34

Has she started?

Screechy

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:09:49

Truly shy people don't go on TV and sing. hmm

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:09:59

Bit shouty for me.

Calm down, love

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:10:02

Oh, sorry no

Florence Welch she aint

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:10:21

Florence is bad enough. We don't need another Florence.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:10:42

Aww, but Danny has found a wee friend.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:10:51

Danny doing his little leprechaun chair dance there.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:10:56

Danny does a kind of Dad Dance, doesn't he?

What is that song?

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:11:17

Is that Per Una?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:11:19

Bet that isn't the last time he tells her to suck it in...

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:11:29

There's not going to be enough wrap dresses in the wardrobe dept for all these booby women.

Jesus but that Florence one makes me itchy all over.
Danny has a new bff. And she has ladyparts! Squee!

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:11:48

Yeah so shy you can tell...

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:11:51

Some belt? Some jacket.

She reminds me of the Northern Dorothy, with the rubber face. Was she a Jessie?

Growlithe Sat 20-Apr-13 21:12:42

I'm not having that. I reckon Danny would press his button for me shouting up the stairs to get the DCs up for school if he's gone for her.

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:12:46

I found the flaw in the chair swivel at home game.

I can't tell who has turned round until the end grin

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:12:57

what the chuff is she wearing?

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:13:02

Amy whino impersonator

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:13:10

Winehouse revisited.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:13:18

Dont light a match near this one, her hair will go up light a catherine wheel.
Jesus amy's back from the dead!

Human League?? Nooooo!!

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 21:13:29

Doing an Arctic Monkeys impression

She looks JUST like Amelia Lilly with a Lily Savage wig.

Is it the rule that if you have that accent, you HAVE to sing like the Arctic Monkeys?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:13:52

No.

Heavywheezing Sat 20-Apr-13 21:14:04

They all go to the same hairdresser

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:14:09

ladyparts

grin

This is another affected singer. She sounds like the one off X Factor. The Victoria wood one.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 21:14:10

And a Human League song

She's a Sheffophile

Thank you.

FuckOffMrBloom Sat 20-Apr-13 21:14:19

Amy Whingehouse.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:14:27

I went free once to an Arctic Monkeys concert. It was just noise.

Poor Phil Oakey with his lop sided hair, having his song murdered.

She will have a proper tantrum and go on BGT now.

Growlithe Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:01

Don't mess with this bloody song. Enough has gone on this last couple of weeks to distort the 80s.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:14

Sue- she will.

With a dog.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:17

Shit - Sue, the no was to her song choice!

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:24

Oh come on she was far far better than the girl before her!

I bet Will-Ich-Bin could only make out one word in ten.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:29

Its not unique though, is it?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:36

Will she make the dog wear a wig?

First single I ever bought. Ruined now. sad

idiot55 Sat 20-Apr-13 21:15:52

dreadful, like a really shouty amy winehouse impersonator

grin I was joshing you Bastards

A dog on a bit of string

Look you at JJ making it ALLABOUT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:16:29

I agree LittleBairn I thought she was better than Florence-alike that was on before her

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:16:31

What's their advice? Be better?

LottieJenkins Sat 20-Apr-13 21:16:37

Sorry but not impressed with this one. These singers are ten a penny!

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:16:39

Oh get off the stage, jessie.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:16:57

See I believe this one when she says she is shy too.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:17:06

Bet her confidence is sky high now.

Arf at 'be better'

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:17:32

I want someone to say, 'I'm an accountant' just so the audience go 'whhhhhoooooooooooooo... oh. right'

This fake whooping when someone says they work with the homeless, or with little kids. MEH.

'half talent, half thick skin' Jessie?
at least 68% Quiff in O'Dodgem's case.

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:17:50

Oh for fucks sake stop weeping. Why go on a programme where you are in with a chance of being rejected if you can't cope?

YoureAllABunchOfBastards Sat 20-Apr-13 21:18:15

Who is this bugger?

why do 'little kids' need to learn to sing anyway?
most can have a fairly good stab at The Wheels On T'Bus

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:18:45

Who is he? Was he someone?

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:18:57

Oh noes, he has to do his own washing up sad

Would it be very wrong to say that Kick Me When I'm Down man here has the har of a 90s lesbian on a sitcom? Yes? Ok so, I won't.

FuckOffMrBloom Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:01

All I've got is my voice.

Oh dear.

Bedsit man is a bit meh.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:13

so far so bad

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:14

Is this that Justin Bieber bloke?

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:15

I think he'll be doing his own washing up for a while. What a shit sob story.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:19

It's nothing like the original. Or the Annie lennox version.

That is not a good thing.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:25

He was scraping the bottom of the sob story bucket.

Quite like him though.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:37

He looks like KD Lang on steroids.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:20:37

Poor chap. You can feel the desperation coming from him.

It took me till now to get what the fecking song was.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:00

He IS lang, isn't he?

He can be KPNutsLang.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:01

Weird.

ZIGACKLY cocolepew. KD Lang pre-Atkins.

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:10

Tom always waits for the big note, doesn't he?

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:16

Is SO KD Lang, Sue.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:32

why have they turned around? totally nonplussed

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 21:21:36

grin KD Lang on steroids

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:04

Ha! I was typing that before I saw yours grin

WHY does it mean a lot coming from her? Cos she's been so 'street'?Had it so tuff?
Give me fucking strength

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:26

sue as a nanny I've been tempted to send a few to singing lessons see if it dulls the torture....

JJ has a lot to say for herself.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:30

Jj's a singer? who knew.

Seriously.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:31

I'm a dancer! I love to dance!

(I'm nicole kidman, btw)

TenPenceMixture Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:33

KPntsLang rofl

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:22:38

KPNutsLang

ROAR

He will go with Will, cause he likes the big name

I'm a singer, i love to sing...

I loved that advert grin

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:23:01

Jessie channeling Nicole Kidman for Chanel there: I am a singer and I love to sing!

Hazel out-typed me grin

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:23:23

hazel- pmsl grin

Do you know, we don't all need to be here. We have the same jokes. We could do a rota.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:23:38

grin

MmeLindor Sat 20-Apr-13 21:23:49

What is this whole 'you don't give up' quatsch. He is only 25yo.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:23:52

Danny probably has been in his shoes, tbf. He probably nicked them.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:07

it's like 'daddy or chips'

ROAR at shoes

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:26

Look at Danny, jizzing jigging in his seat, on FriendWatch.

Wolfcub Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:39

Bof grin

Last time Danny saw someone with a quiff like that, was when he was taking tickets at the Hall of Mirrors.

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:44

Good grief we are all one on this thread. Menstrual cycles will be syncing up next.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:56

Hazel gringringrin

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:24:59

Week 2, he'll have a geetar.
Just watch.

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:25:06

'Friendwatch'

he's sooooo desperate, poor wee leprechaun.

FriendWatch grin

Chris Packham will be following O'Dodgems round, picking through his shit.

LittleBairn Sat 20-Apr-13 21:25:53

They won't let each other down, they are going to keep it up together.

The reason you see a lot of yourself in him, O'Dodgems, is not The Pain. It's because he looks like a fat lesbian you.

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:26:29

One Voice <deep> <nods>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:27:08

FatLesbianDan- Sue- it could catch on.

HazeltheMcWitch Sat 20-Apr-13 21:27:14

Ladeez, it has been N*Synced

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 21:27:50

Next week , dudes x

BOF Sat 20-Apr-13 21:28:16

Got to be KPNutsLang.

That's me away for another week. Laters <hip>

Raahh Sat 20-Apr-13 21:29:19

It's been a blast , peeps.

But, ffs- how many more weeks of auditions can there be??

AmIthatSpringy Sat 20-Apr-13 21:29:45

Thank you all. This thread was better than the actual show

<still love Nadeem from second show> wink

Heavywheezing Sat 20-Apr-13 21:34:00

I think we should audition next year

Will-Ich-Bin on Wossy now

SoulTrain Sat 20-Apr-13 21:58:54

Oh, so here you all hide. I'll be back next week, I'll bring crisps.

For the record, I thought KD Lang impersonator was FABULOUS. I sense I might not fit in round these parts.

SoulTrain Sat 20-Apr-13 22:00:39

I'd audition just to tell Jessie effing Dickface to fuck off. You're about as street as Sylvia Young, coincidental this is not seeing as that's where you hailed from. You utter, utter dickwad.

Who's with me?

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 22:08:51

We should audition as one and wear matchy jackets.
Style and Beauty will help us.

NoelHeadbands Sat 20-Apr-13 22:11:57

I'm in Soul

Although you go in first, she's a bit hard faced.

I'm up for a matchy jacket too. Mustard?

cocolepew Sat 20-Apr-13 22:13:46

Oh no, I can't wear mustard, too sallow skinned.
I can imagine us all in animal print and big hair.

I don't do animal print. I don't know why.

Now. New thread? Raah, you on a puter? Or will I? Or anyone, indeed?

Raahh Sat 27-Apr-13 17:13:44

Sue- you can do the honours. I am suffering day 2 of a migraine, and feel less than dopesad<pathetic self pity>

I am not sure I will be awake for tonightsad

grin

Nooooo, Raah, poor you.
Have a power nap and you'll be grand for 8.

Raahh Sat 27-Apr-13 17:17:45

That's what i'm hoping- waiting for dh to come back from ds's karate tournament. DD2 is not a mini Florence nightingale.

See you later!(hopefully)

new thread

hope so, s'not the same without the usual crowd. Feel better soon.

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 18:26:48

I ferl your pain Raahh, day 3 of a mega headache for me. Feel better soon flowers

cocolepew Sat 27-Apr-13 18:27:06

feel

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