any ideas who kats seeing EASTENDERS

(205 Posts)
gloomywinters2 Wed 05-Dec-12 16:42:57

i have been racking my brains wondering is it one of the braning brothers i thought it was derick at first don,t no why any suggestions.

gloomywinters2 Wed 05-Dec-12 16:43:43

faming computerblush

noisytoys Wed 05-Dec-12 16:53:02

I don't know but it's getting boring now. Eastenders used to be 'who shot Phil? Now it's 'who's shagging Kat'. It's gone downhill somewhat!!

i used to adore EE, i was such an addict. i haven't watched it at all now for about 3 months. there's no one in it that i give a damn about, even Kat and I used to really like her.

BluelightsAndSirens Wed 05-Dec-12 17:05:27

It's not Derek or Jack because when Kat was out shagging they came into the pub. I'd be surprised if it was Max though can't believe I just typed that

hf128219 Wed 05-Dec-12 17:07:10

It's Shirley.

DoesntTurkeyNSproutSoupDragOn Wed 05-Dec-12 17:08:33

I'm hoping that the resolution of this storyline results in Kat leaving with her comedy plastic lips.

vintageviolets Wed 05-Dec-12 17:11:50

Its Patrick

BornInACrossFireHurricane Wed 05-Dec-12 17:12:25

It's been confirmed in interviews etc that it is one of the branning brothers- my money is on derek yuk

BornInACrossFireHurricane Wed 05-Dec-12 17:14:06

I agree about the show going down hill- it has been brilliant in the past but corrie is far better now imo

LaurieBlueBell Wed 05-Dec-12 17:39:48

I'm going for it being Derek, though why anyone would want to shag pugface is beyond me.
Max is too obvious and Jack is loved up with Sharon.

<needs to get a life emoticon>

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 05-Dec-12 23:41:26

I still think it isn't a branning brother

No one thought LISA would shoot phil

DoesntTurkeyNSproutSoupDragOn Thu 06-Dec-12 07:12:01

I think the only one sly enough to do all the stuff with the candle and her mother's ring etc is Derek.

Maslotte Thu 06-Dec-12 22:00:12

If you watch the Christmas advert for EE it is giving the impression it is Max hmm

tethersjinglebellend Thu 06-Dec-12 22:06:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BluelightsAndSirens Thu 06-Dec-12 22:29:14

It's not Derek I tell you. When Kat was missing he came into the pub which means she was not with him and she came home with shagging hair.

Tether you are dicing with death telling Lisa's confession on the web shock

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 06-Dec-12 23:00:10

I think its Derek, he's the only one I can imagine writing I Love You on a bandage for a Laaaaydeeee

I can't stand Kat, think she's a terrible actor

Or rather actress.

Andula Fri 07-Dec-12 15:13:36

It's Phil

StopPickingYourNose Fri 07-Dec-12 19:29:54

It's Cora

Bakingnovice Fri 07-Dec-12 19:53:39

The most vile and pointless storyline in the history of any soap in the world. Could they make Kat seem any seedier?

EggInABap Fri 07-Dec-12 23:26:38

I think it's Tyler Moon. Just a weird gut feeling!

StopPickingYourNose Sat 08-Dec-12 00:20:12


SinisterBuggyMonth Sat 08-Dec-12 00:52:19

Kat is really starting to remind me of a crow. A crow with boobs.

StopPickingYourNose Sat 08-Dec-12 00:56:57

A crow with silly cones, Sinister.

Maslotte Sat 08-Dec-12 20:46:44

Kat has a key for a bedsit doesn't she.......isn't it the same bedsit that Max used to meet Stacey at......and the same bedsit that he gave Tanya a key for when they started to get back together??

MildredIsMyAlterEgo Sat 08-Dec-12 23:27:40
Blondeshavemorefun Tue 11-Dec-12 06:30:56


I said a while back I thought could be a moon as when in the kitchen and Kat was tending to his wounds Alfie stuck his head in and didn't se surprised he was there

So assumed someone on their family and not a branning

Tyler behaving oddly in last night's episode. He couldn't go on that planned shopping trip with Whitney (whose style is a bit like a young Kat, poosibly?).

Bored of it all now though, tbh.

chipstick10 Tue 11-Dec-12 08:20:19

Am I right in thinking the actress who plays tanka is leaving, if just for a while? If that is the case then I would guess max. It would be a more dramatic storyline if its max because he has a partner also and he's got previous. Derek is being killed off isn't he!? Though that would make it equally as dramatic. A chance for hammy over the top acting from Kate and Alfie, yawn.

They are both dreadful actors. Kat used to be good, don't know what changed her? Seen better acting in the local primary school nativity.

ViviPru Wed 12-Dec-12 12:27:53

Alfie's a wet fart. I'm glad he's being screwed over.

Me too. The sooner this unsavoury pair disappear from the Square the better. Would like to see more of Kim, she's hilarious!

MrsBucketxx Wed 12-Dec-12 16:38:04

its derek. he gets murdered over christmas and there will be a big who done it apparently.

kats shagging him
joey hates his dad
tanya lets on that lauren is dereks after her raped her when they where younger.
max has his secret revealed by him, and finds out about lauren.
lauren finds out too
alfie finds out its dereks who is the other man.

you just see im well informed.

MrsBucketxx Wed 12-Dec-12 16:38:39

kat leaves and he ends up with roxy.

rufussmum Wed 12-Dec-12 17:34:04

I think Kat's looked at all the hopeless males on offer and plamped for a woman. She's having a lesbian fling with......Tanya? Cora? Bianca? Or the silent barmaid, I think she's called Tracy.

rufussmum Thu 13-Dec-12 19:30:31

Oh come on you lot. Somebody must agree with me?

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 13-Dec-12 20:45:03

Mrs Bucket that sounds about right. However in true Eastenders style the murderer will be none of the above. My money is on Alice.

Bakingnovice Thu 13-Dec-12 22:53:10

Does anyone give a fuck? Surely everyone will be rejoicing that one of the worst characters ever is dead. Can't stand Derek.

Kat next. Then Alfie.

Actually, really disliking Lauren too ATM. She's always been a brat and she's acting like an immature brat now. Don't think she can be Derek's daughter though as Tanya was not horrified when finding out about joey.

Am liking Kim and Denise. Thank god they've given Zainab and the mad-moods a break.

perceptionInaPearTree Wed 19-Dec-12 11:27:46

I thought the cast doesn't know who Kat is having the affair with either?

perceptionInaPearTree Wed 19-Dec-12 11:28:06

Lauren is Derek's - seriously??

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 19-Dec-12 15:21:20

thing is if derek raped tanys, wouldnt she be a bit more pissed off with him/ignore him

hes always saying that if tanya doesnt do what he wants he will say it wasnt joey who was driving but lauren

surely she would say, you owe me and if you say anything about lauren, then i will tell what you did to me

plus if ANY chnace of lauren being dereks surely tanys would have tried her hardest to stop her and joey

JingleBellsAllTheWay Wed 19-Dec-12 15:59:33

Theres no way Derek raped Tanya! I agree with blond shave.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 19-Dec-12 16:16:34

always makes me laugh some call me blonde shaves, others blondes have (which it is meant to be )

this blonde wax's


GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 11:02:18

Do we find out tonight??

susanann Thu 20-Dec-12 11:19:05

ive been wondering if shes turned lesbian? I dont watch it but its all over the papers etc so dont need to. lol. May watch tonight just for the hell of it. One day they will have a nice story at xmas!!

headfairy Thu 20-Dec-12 11:26:53

Isn't Joey a Branning? Could she be having a thing with him? They do like to chuck in curve balls still not believing wotsisname fathered 'Ev's baby

It is tonight. Already I firmed as either jack, Derek or max.

Confirmed even.

FestiveFiggy Thu 20-Dec-12 12:26:52

My theory has been all along that it was Derek with the 1 doubt in my mind being that he wouldn't ever tell anyone that he loved them as it would make him vulnerable. I had written off Jack until recently as he was swimming in girls at the time the affair started and I didn't think he would put Alfie though it after what they went through together over Tommy. I do now think it is Jack as things aren't going well with Sharon and as we find out tonight it can be max as he gets married to Tanya on Christmas day and there is no way she would go through with that if it comes out tonight that he's been having an affair with Kat.

Not that I think about this far too much you understand I just want it over with Alfie's sake I love him!!!

ViviPru Thu 20-Dec-12 13:52:47

Ok I'm confused.

I'm sure I heard reference previously to Max and Tanya's wedding being on Xmas eve, so why did Kat say she didn't want to have to cope with the wedding reception on her own when she was under the impression Alfie was only leaving for one night this week? Now Figgy's saying they're getting married Christmas day? WTF?

Blondes makes good points - we keep having these ridiculous hypothetical debates chez-pru about how that wouldn't happen because of such-and-such. All of the Derek puppetmaster rubbish WOULDN'T HAPPEN because Tanya would just tell Max about Lauren driving and Derek holding them to ransom by covering it up. She'd also have told Joey at her hen do too. And Joey would have told Lauren Derek's making them do it.

Gah. I'm way too invested.

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 13:59:13

Oh I love Derek's character!!

Think he plays it so well-especially as his dad is/was a real life east end gangster.

Love to hate him

BloominMisteltoeMarvellousWine Thu 20-Dec-12 14:02:17

ViviPru They are supposed to marry on Xmas eve but then this 'secret' comes out. She then decides to forgive him and marry him anyway so they marry xmas day.

I think....

I may have been dreaming this

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 14:10:13

I'm thinking Lauren will kill Derek so joey doesn't have to leave walford.

Max's secret is the money thing, so Tanya cancels wedding then changes mind.

Think it's ray shagging Kat.

Not Derek, agree with who ever said he would say 'I love you'

Not max-he has his money and wedding Christmas story line.

Jacks got more class.

Blondeshavemorefun Thu 20-Dec-12 16:48:17

i dither all the time

cant be derek - he really isnt a roses man and imagining that heaving on top of you dripping sweat and drool onto kats cleavage just is so wrong

'blondes shudders'

cant be a branning - sure tv just said that as a huge red herring !!!

still think possibly a moon or a slater shock how about sean

or a female/tanya

What is Max's secret. I don't think there was anything more about it since he was standing with Derek outside a house a few months ago.

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 18:40:52

I think it's Jack.

We're supposed to think it's Derek or Max...

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 18:56:53

I think it's Jack too.
Can't believe Max would be so keen to get married if carrying on with Kat.
Can't see it being Joey.
Dear lord I don't want to think of Derek shagging Kat. [boak face]

There aren't anymore Brannings?

MrsJREwing Thu 20-Dec-12 19:01:50

Do we find out tonight?

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 19:06:32

Yes supposed to be tonight.

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 19:10:15

Yes think so- in the last 1.5 seconds of it no doubt

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 19:36:33

Ooh a cloth on the lamp!!! Clarsssay!

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:36:35

I bet it's Max....i don't blame her - i would blush

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 20-Dec-12 19:42:00

Think it's puddock features derek! Urgh! Imagine his big slobbery lips flubbering in for a kiss. Ewewewewewwwweeeeeeewwwwwwww

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:42:50

Surely for the sake of decency they wouldn't make it him.....he is flesh crawly vile.

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 19:47:13

My money is on Derek now. Yuck. sad

Ooooohhh max has no eyelashes or blonde piggy ones, would freak me out!!!

Did Derek play football?

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 19:48:29

Got to be Derek!

I've changed my mind

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 20-Dec-12 19:49:32

Someone give her a shovel! She gonna have do a lot of digging to get out of this one

Oooohhh it's ..................

It is so wrong, I want him to whack the vile bitch. Poor old wet Alfie!

Come on, come on.

I can't take him seriously when he says filthy, he can't say it properly!

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 19:51:14

Maybe Alfie kills Derek!!

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 19:51:18

This is actually quite good, I usually can't watch more than a minute of Shane Ritchie without the urge to vomit.

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 19:52:28

Shagging pmsl

Derek, it's got to be!

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 19:52:57

Oh see now I think it's Derek again

MrsDeVere Thu 20-Dec-12 19:53:24

Oh its just grim innit?

I wish they would get a bloody fecking move on!

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:54:06

Derek must be...

Oh no no no no. It's Piggy Eyes!

QueenOfCats Thu 20-Dec-12 19:56:50

I knew it was Max!!

FiercePanda Thu 20-Dec-12 19:57:04

He just can't keep it in his pants, can he?!

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:57:17

Oh no, not my Max!!

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 19:57:45

I knew it's MAX the pervert, guaranteed as he and Tania getting married again.... could be wrong but c'mon Derek (vomit)

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:57:46


It's Derek! Bleugh!

FiercePanda Thu 20-Dec-12 19:57:55

...or not! Bloody hell.

Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:04

I don't watch EE but just saw this. What are the Game Over! t-shirts about?

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:09


She must be desperate!

MrsSJG Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:10


whatkungfuthat Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:11


Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:24

Eh? It's Derek?

MrsDeVere Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:31


3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:31


GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:37

Fuck sake Derek- smoking ban? Ring any bells?

dexter73 Thu 20-Dec-12 19:58:50

That was quite a good little twist at the end!

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:00

So relieved it's not Max!!

How could she?!

Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:08

Why did she ring the ginger man's phone then?

wifey6 Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:24

Knew it would be Derek..but a great twist! Yuck...he is vile!!

Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:31

Sorry Max's.

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:32

Thank god that's out, I'm sure that's one of the longest every storylines!

Whats with all the soaps tonight? I'm missing out on some Mumsnetting here...

BluelightsAndSirens Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:35

Waahhhhhhh, that is fucking gross. They will never get the smoke smell out of the furnishings.

Fakebook Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:36

DEREK? I feel sick. Bleugh.

3ForMe Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:44

Lol greeny

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 19:59:56

WTF would anyone shag Derek DEREK Of all the losers I Walford him! Id rather shag Ian during his tramp days.

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:00:17

I missed the explanation as to why she was calling Max, did she explain?

FiercePanda Thu 20-Dec-12 20:00:36

Derek has to be the least desirable man in Walford. What was Kat thinking?!

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:24


Smoking ban, I never even thought about that!

Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:34

Shane Richie deserves it after what he did to that poor Nolan sister mind.

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:44

I think she said she was trying to warn Derek bit couldn't get through

MrsSJG Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:46

Apparently to warn him Alfie was on the way

Fakebook Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:57

Derek seduced her. He's getting his own back at Alfie for not selling his knock off booze and being on Phil's side. He doesn't love her, it was all a game to get back at Alfie.

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 20:01:59

She called max because she couldn't get through to Derek and she wanted to warn them Alfie was on the rampage. Possibily to ask max to pass her onto Derek.

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:02:06

Didn't even think....

Never even sounds a bit EastEndish blush

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 20-Dec-12 20:02:24

<cleans up pile of vom>

Why kat why??

Dirty old Derek blergggggh

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 20:03:23

I hope this the end of 'Kat n Alfie' now, I've never understood their popularity

dexter73 Thu 20-Dec-12 20:03:33

But would the fuzzy man peach Max have been a better alternative? Both are yuk!

QODRestYeMerryGentlemen Thu 20-Dec-12 20:03:56

Derek the slug, leaves his slimey trail all over Kat

that shouldn't even be allowed. Derek?! Vommmm.

cocolepew Thu 20-Dec-12 20:04:34

Good grief it would be like kissing a toad, kissing ole liver lips. Yuk.

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:04:42

Alfie throws her out tomorrow!

Good on him I say. I liked Kat erm... many years ago but now I find her crass/fake/slapperish and many more words I cannot spell.

So it was false for Derek but real for Kat, she has had more chances than my ex had. grin

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 20:06:29

Imagine receiving cunnilingus from Derek [vomicon]



HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Thu 20-Dec-12 20:09:49

Least you wouldn't have to see his face greeny!

cbeebiesatemybrain Thu 20-Dec-12 20:09:50

Urgh Greeny I need to scrub my brain now!

Can you imagine Kat and Derek shagging?! Bleurgh!

cocolepew Thu 20-Dec-12 20:13:37

You'd need a Tena Lady after Greeny. Do they soak up saliva?

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 20-Dec-12 20:17:58

Oh my god you lot are disgusting! I can never unread what I have just read!!

FestiveFiggy Thu 20-Dec-12 20:19:41

Damn it why didn't I stick with my first instincts said all along until yesterday it was Derek!!

Good acting from old Shane there!!

Jojobells1986 Thu 20-Dec-12 20:20:48


GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 20:21:25

Roffle @ Tena Lady

Drool down to your knees and his floppy greasy fringe resting on your mons. But yes, at least you wouldn't see his face.

I've made myself sick now.

Blondeshavemorefun Thu 20-Dec-12 20:22:01

Greeny eyes - gawd that's disgusting

And yes I thought about smoking ban

Derek??? Really???

Obv a tad deranged and maybe should join jean in the pill popping

Lovely cute Alfie sad

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 20-Dec-12 20:24:07

Greeny you are sick, sick in the head! grin

GreenyEyes Thu 20-Dec-12 20:25:29

I know. I disgust myself grin

RedToothbrush Thu 20-Dec-12 20:26:31

Well that was shit. And predictable.

Shit story line.

What next? Derek tops himself and Max is Joey's Dad, hence why Max always sticks up for and defends Derek cos he's guilty and why Derek is so desperate for Joey's approval?

I really bloody hope not.

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:28:02


Eww nope I couldn't with Derek, he is proper yucky!

I'm trying to remember Kats last man but I cannot think, she did leave for some years though, then I left them... Oh I remembered it the boxing gym guy, who is he again? He was Alfies friend or something, he is her babies Dad, yes that it....yup slapper!

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 20:29:07

I'm dissapointed tbh! I really thought I figured it all out, so who will ruin Tanya and Max's next wedding now then I wonder.

McPheastOfStephen Thu 20-Dec-12 20:32:31

Eurgh I feel like scrubbing Kat with a Brillo pad

Jingleallthejay Thu 20-Dec-12 20:33:35

we all knew it was derek for weeks and months there has been threads it is derek yes it is derek blah blah, but when the reveal came i honestly thought i was gonna heave ewwwww derek !

Jingleallthejay Thu 20-Dec-12 20:34:08

Eurgh I feel like scrubbing Kat with a Brillo pad

she needs sheep dipped

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 21:26:18

I would watch what you say she will be shagging sheep next, she is surely getting desperate now, might be an idea, put her off the men!

Bakingnovice Thu 20-Dec-12 21:48:28

Eurghhhhhhh. Disturbing visuals in my head!!!

Grossest storyline in the history of the world. In terms of nasty buggers Kat and Derek are very suited. Eurghhhhhhhh. Triple boak.

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 20-Dec-12 22:32:30

Can I just refere you all to my earlier post on page 2 and collect my fiver.

Derek was always soooo writing "i love you" on bog roll because "THE LAAAAAAYYDEEEEEEEEZE LUV A BIT OF THE OLD ROOHHHMAANCE, DUUNNT THEY?"

toldmywrath Thu 20-Dec-12 22:33:04

Yes Sparkling I agree-that boy Shane Richie deserves all he gets because of the way he treated the poor Nolan sister.

MildredIsMyAlterEgo Thu 20-Dec-12 22:44:27

Derek shock wtf! Has Kat-The-Dog got eyes? Ones that actually work?

I feel ill sad shock

Sparklingbrook Thu 20-Dec-12 22:45:27

grin told. maybe he is a reformed character now.

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 22:50:14

shock never mind scrubbing Kat with a brillo think I might need it to scrub my brain and eyes! It was a bad idea to read this thread before bed. Dear lord please please don't give me Derek shagging nightmares...

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 22:51:22

sparkling might be mixing him up with someone else but didn't he get caught out again on his current partner.

MildredIsMyAlterEgo Thu 20-Dec-12 22:52:37

LB please don't use the words 'Derek' and 'shagging' in the same sentence.

I'm struggling to hold down the bile here.

Bakingnovice Thu 20-Dec-12 22:53:54

Yes! Alfie cheated on his wife with a crazy fan.

Kat is vile. Derek is vile.

nailak Thu 20-Dec-12 22:54:33

Max's past is back to haunt him thanks to Derek and everyone is stunned by the huge secret he's been hiding, although a smug Derek gloats about causing all the mess. A massive argument erupts between the Brannings, with Derek telling everyone what he really thinks of them. Max, Jack and Joey force Derek out of the house, but what happens next will change the family hierarchy forever…

Read more:
Follow us: @digitalspy on Twitter | digitalspyuk on Facebook"

so one of the Brannings dies then?

LittleBairn Thu 20-Dec-12 22:56:48

mildred sorry I blame Alfie he was first to use the word. grin

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Thu 20-Dec-12 23:02:04

Yeah it is Derek who dies apparently that is why I thought, actually no that makes no sense! Bloody gin!

I just want to know in advance who spoils Maxs wedding I know someone will! Maybe Derek?

pumpkinsweetieMasPudding Thu 20-Dec-12 23:31:18

I knew it was derek all alonggrin

MyLittleAprilSunshine Thu 20-Dec-12 23:40:15


Lauren spoils the wedding technically as she tells her Dad about Joey, Max confronts Tanya and Tanya and Lauren fight and Tanya tells Lauren Joey still loves her and Lauren rips up Tanya's wedding dress.

Max gets her a new one for the next day but Tanya doesn't know but before they marry, or perhaps after I am not sure, Derek tells Tanya and the rest of the Branning family about Max's secret.

Everyone loses it with Derek and doesn't want to know him and then he gets killed. Who kills him, I have no idea.

MyLittleAprilSunshine Thu 20-Dec-12 23:41:58

Oh and yeah it's pretty damn grim to think of anyone shagging Derek. Max or Jack I can see why you'd be interested but Derek? I always thought it was Derek though, because I honestly think Jack and Max would have more respect for Alfie and Max is broke so wouldn't be able to pay for her ring, plus Jack is always with Sharon right now so how would he be able to go and visit her?

Still though the thought of anyone with Derek -- anyone -- makes me feel ill. Still be sad to see him die though as him traumatising everyone makes for interesting TV.

SinisterBuggyMonth Thu 20-Dec-12 23:48:00

The Derek dying thing is old news.

I reckon - Max confesses his "secret", Tanya forgives him, the wedding goes ahead, Lauren and Joey thing comes out, Max is dead against it, Tania is all live and let live they are cousins and Max confesses to being Joeys dad.

And at some point Derek gets killed.

pumpkinsweetieMasPudding Fri 21-Dec-12 00:06:53

The secret is Joey is Laurens brother.
Tanya and Derek are their parents.

RedToothbrush Fri 21-Dec-12 00:22:45

Oh come on.

First I'm asked to believe that Kat the proven slapper has slept with Derek. Which even for Kat is a stretch.

And then you ask me to believe that Derek managed to shag Tanya?

Seriously? Thats got to be one of the least believable things in the history of British soap and thats saying something!

MrsChristmasVamos Fri 21-Dec-12 00:30:16


DH thinks Derek shagging Kat is nonsense, and there's more to the story.

My take was that he is similar to Kat's Uncle who abused her....maybe some weird/sick kind of thing going on ? A step too far, I think but you never know with EE.

Max's secret ? Is he really the one ? I always thought it was Jack, was disappointed tonight.

I did have a really wild out there thought that maybe Max's secret was Stacey and baby/toddler are back and he's been taking care of them ? That would be bloody good if they had kept a return like that quiet.

DH and I also think that the secret (if not the above) isn't actually that awful, and Derek is shafting Max. Did you see him pocket all that money the other night, Max had given him for 'the others' ? grin

I realise I have thought about all this far too much and this time next week we shall probably know all the answers !

Sleepyfergus Fri 21-Dec-12 06:18:21

Alfie on Daybreak yesterday morning said this is the end of Kat & Alfie.......but that next year they get back together to deal with something major....?

Something to do with Tommy maybe?

hattymattie Fri 21-Dec-12 06:24:05

I thought Derek was covering for Max and that it was really Max. Hence the phone call and that Derek looked so calm.

Jingleallthejay Fri 21-Dec-12 08:27:57

I would watch what you say she will be shagging sheep next, she is surely getting desperate now


qazxc Fri 21-Dec-12 09:00:20

the morning after and I am still nauseated. Derek should be barred (for breaking the smoking ban if nothing else).
I don't quite believe it is him though (or maybe that's wishful thinking) because of the phone call. if she was ringing max to get derek would she not start with "can you put derek on".
I have a theory about Lauren, I don't think she is Tanya's. I think she is derek's and tanya's sister's child. When derek first came in, he alluded to previous sexy time with Renee at max's wedding, saying he remembered it well during his time in prison and how she was "all grown up now".

Jingleallthejay Fri 21-Dec-12 09:03:07

she is derek's and tanya's sister's child

oo maybe that would explain laurens over the top and addictive personality and she is so dark skinned and hair she looks nothing like tanya or max I did <snort> at your sexy time reference,

SinisterBuggyMonth Fri 21-Dec-12 09:31:29

No, Laurens addictive personality comes from Cora, who is fast starting to adopt the persona of Vic Reeves doing Loyd Grossman. Max definately thinks he is Laurens bio dad.

I want Alfie to get together with Roxy now to rub Kats nose in it. I dont especially like Roxy, so its like hoping Alfie gets a cold rather than the norovirus. I thought he was bloody great last night.

Derek though. How can a man who cant even properly light a cigar be compitent in the sack. Kats quality control has really skydived.

LittleBairn Fri 21-Dec-12 11:02:07

I don't believe for a minute Lauren is Derek's if she was Tanya would be a lot more horrified she didn't seem that bothered IMO about them being cousins.
She has tried to keep them apart due to Derek's blackmail.

The big secret is to do with Max, not Tanya or Derek. Looks like its to do with money and dodge business deals.

WhatDoesTheDogSay Fri 21-Dec-12 11:43:01

MrsChristmas, I agree, I think Derek had some kind of nasty, twisted power over Kat. Played on her vulnerabilities, perhaps almost 'groomed' her before she saw sense and freaked out. (I know, I know, over thinking grin!) He has def been abusive in the sense of stalking her and not taking no for an answer.

He is stomach-churningly vile, though! A great big flubbery, slobbery lech. <shudders>

CajaDeLaMemoria Fri 21-Dec-12 11:47:07

It's revealed on the DM website, in the side bar, for anyone who is interested!

Jingleallthejay Fri 21-Dec-12 12:48:37

I think derek did it to get back at Alfie because of a dodgy deal he and billy scuppered in the summer (cant remember if it was stolen booze or 'something) but really Kat REALLY <shudder>

captainmummy Fri 21-Dec-12 13:10:18

I hope derek gets killed by sharon, and he kills her with his dying breath. Also that Cora somehow also gets killed, along with Bianca. and many many others

caja can you link. There are loads of EE on the sidebar.

SinisterBuggyMonth Fri 21-Dec-12 13:13:16

Anyway, WTF is with Cora?

She spent the majority of Tanyas last wedding to Greg saying Max was the love of Tanyas life. Now shes marrying Max hes not good enough. Did you see the smirk when Alfie accused Max?! Nasty woman.

Blondeshavemorefun Fri 21-Dec-12 13:46:27

no way lauren can be dereks via rape or consensual sex or she would have flipped with the relationship with joey and lauren, and she didnt

unless max is joeys dad and he had an affair with dereks wife/alices/joeys mum

we all know max cant keep it in his pants grin

he had an affair with tanya while was married to his ex wife

perceptionInaPearTree Fri 21-Dec-12 13:57:44

Cora's a toxic screw up though isn't she? Really cannot believe how EE have destroyed the characters of Kat and Alfie - they used to be so likable.

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Fri 21-Dec-12 14:19:56

I would take what the daily mail says with a pinch of salt re Lauren being Derek's and who the think the killer is. It looks like its based on the betting odds.

Interview I read on digital spy (much more reliable grin) with jake wood says max is supporting Lauren and joeys relationship. Would link but I can't right now.

No idea what his secret could be though, murder? Drugs? Secret lover named Bruce?

CajaDeLaMemoria Fri 21-Dec-12 15:59:49

Heres what the DM says... here

But they've changed the wording since it went up this morning. Earlier it unveiled him as definitely the man, and had pictures of Alfie shouting at him. Now it seems to suggest that it doesn't actually either they got it wrong, or they've been told off by somebody!

MrsJREwing Fri 21-Dec-12 20:17:55

Seeing them in action is so nausiating.

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Fri 21-Dec-12 20:20:07

[fevny] < sick face

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Fri 21-Dec-12 20:20:24

Fail! envy

3ForMe Fri 21-Dec-12 20:23:53

He's going to play the wrong one

NotWankinginaWinterWonderland Fri 21-Dec-12 20:25:31

I was in the kitchen did they just kiss ? <cringe> I heard slurpy noises. Who beat Derek up? Eww he is awful in every possible way.

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Fri 21-Dec-12 20:32:08

What a dickhead. He deserves to die!

Jingleallthejay Fri 21-Dec-12 21:25:18

god he is vile but tbh they both deserve each other I do hope they don't get back together KaT is just a strumpet as my nana used to say grin

maniacbug Fri 21-Dec-12 21:27:43

Just watching tonight's on iPlayer...
Have been trying to work it out for a while, now I have it:

Jingleallthejay Fri 21-Dec-12 21:29:13

urgh jabba the branning grin

brighterfuture Fri 21-Dec-12 22:35:16

maniac grin

Blondeshavemorefun Sat 22-Dec-12 18:16:26

I was wondering why Derek was being so nice bit turns out he isn't

Tho if Alfie had any brains Kat mentioned the football match and they havnt player for months so he must know its an old message

I would have looked through and listened to all the messages on there if I was him

Still shudder at Derek grin

perceptionInaPearTree Sat 22-Dec-12 22:08:10

I knew he was going to play a different message! Derek can't lie straight in bed.

SoleSource Mon 24-Dec-12 22:59:41

Lmao at jingles sheep comment!

EE is boring

Just watched on catch-up (I've seen a few episodes last week to get up to speed for Christmas. Then I'll ignore EE for a few months)

If Max & Tanya were set to get married how could they have gone through the registering and legal stuff when he's already married ?

Don't let the truth get in the way of a story eh confused

I have a feeling that it isn't a heart attack. I reckon poison may be?

HoHoHokeyCokeyPigInAPokey Wed 26-Dec-12 09:27:37

Oh gregs i like that idea!

perceptionInaPearTree Wed 26-Dec-12 11:37:30

I thought that 70is. Poison sounds possible - in his drink? Everyone was there so many possibilities of who did it.

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Wed 26-Dec-12 13:09:32

He was grabbing his arm heart attack style though. Dh is a legal and thnks back they all stood there and watched and did nothing they are still culpable for his death.

I think it was a bit disappointing, but there might be more to it.

Think we could be in for some interesting scenes from max and his wife!

Jo joiner is going on a years sabbatical soon too! So the trout pout could be around for a while.

Blondeshavemorefun Wed 26-Dec-12 15:47:15

i thought derek was murdered - unless as was said he was poisoned ..........

I was hoping for a good shooting, or something (sick in the head)

I had to watch Emmerdale instead, some good body burying going on there..

I just can't see it being a heart attack. There. Must've more to it than that. I think so anyway.

whatkungfuthat Thu 27-Dec-12 11:12:34

It doesn't seem that long since the last lengthy break that Jo Joiner took. The trout pout reminds me of a young, rough Stephanie Beacham

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 27-Dec-12 16:06:29

She's got twins! That's what her last sabbatical was for! I'm guessing this one is to rest and sleep!

OverlyYappyAlways Thu 27-Dec-12 18:24:01

I love this thread, it saves me 30 minutes viewing on a erm.. Tue/Thu/Fri...

GlaikitFizzogTheChristmasElf Thu 27-Dec-12 18:38:42

Monday Tuesday Thursday and Friday Overly!! C'mon!

SoleSource Thu 27-Dec-12 20:10:53

Easties one hour tonight.

CanYouHearMe Thu 27-Dec-12 21:44:19

I bet Michael took the gear from the lock-up.

OverlyYappyAlways Thu 27-Dec-12 22:37:37

I did think Mon but it looks tiny big bit sad.. ahem...I am catching 10.30pm one...

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