X Factor First live show.......................

(1000 Posts)
LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:01:15

Hope you dont mind that i have started the new thread....................

Oh, well done.

Braced for a looooong recap...

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:01:52

Hi Lottie! I've got wine and chocolate and I'm all set!

Might be a plan to link it on the old one? I'd do it, but my laptop/MN is being slooooow.

KateByChristmas Sat 06-Oct-12 20:02:25

Hello - I can't believe I've been hooked in again. I vowed I wouldn't watch this year but here I am smile

Who are you usually, Kate?

Righto, bets for the Wildcard? I think it's between Coronary Chris and Cahncil Amy.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:03:55

Hello, just taken my pills, so after 9pm might be bearable for me!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:04:02

I've missed the last few weeks, so I don't know who's through. Don't they normally have 16 in the live shows, not 12?

Loving Dermot's Gangnam Style!

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:04:43


Wine <hides from BIWI> despite Bootcamp

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:04:46

I hope Amy is the wildcard!

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:04:56

I'm in!

I don't really understand what gangnam is. Or why.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:05:21

Is Amy the big girl with the Adele voice? I like her.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:05:21

Hello folks, tv off here, putting child to bed. Am imagining big hair little dresses and dodgy dermot dance

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:05:34

I don't like Shitsinger's dress!

Oh fuck off with the salute, Shitsinger. Don't be starting that now.

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:05:50

Hurrah T hasnt done her stupid arm thing!!!!

AViewfromtheFridge Sat 06-Oct-12 20:05:58

Don't they all get a wildcard (therefore equaling 16)?

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:14

BAD dresses!

I thnk they should make the wildcards fight to the death. Winner stays on.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:44

No, there's just one wildcard.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:47

Hello all! <waves>

I've got lasagne in the oven and a pint of water hmm DH is out in town so it's me, the tv, oh and you lot!

Loved Dermie's dancing. How mean to bring all the wild cards back!

jaffacakehips Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:47

WTF is she wearing?


Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:57

Times REd for me!

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:06:58

Amy who lives with 40 people in a council house or badtan gazza for wild card.

Chris is dressed like he's just left his day job in the Halifax confused

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:08

I've missed loads and loads - can't remember who anyone is, don't even know who made Judges' Houses. But will watch regardless.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:23

Go Amy!

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:36

Chris please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:38

Gangnam needs no explanation.

(it's a trendy area of Seoul, he's taking the piss out of poncing Korean hipsters who think they're cool. Like people who pretend to live in Chelsea and go to gigs in Dalston, when they really live in Chiswick and go to gigs at the O2 arena).

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:46

Noooooooooooooo! Is this a wind up?!

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:07:53


Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:08:00


Hope he goes out tomorrow!

cardibach Sat 06-Oct-12 20:08:04

I can;t watch wiht you tonight - DD out and saving the recording to watch with her! See you all next time!

Oh I knew it, when the had him standing in the middle, like Jesus.

it'll be a sob-off every week with him and Dick Dastardly.

Bye bye hot boys, Cahncil Amy and Spiky Poo II.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:08:16

We've got him sobbing already and bloody Ryland?!

jaffacakehips Sat 06-Oct-12 20:08:16

Ohhh the dramatics have started already!

No cardi, no boffles?

It's a lean ship tonight.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:19

Wrong, and not for the last time, I'm sure!

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:26

Is fucking gazza through?

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:32

Will he ever stop whining? Holy fuck he's annoying.

jaffacakehips Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:33

Wow, just wow!

look at those black leggings on Ryland

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:42

I just shout Fuck Off at the tele!

DH has been winding me up all day and has just piped up "what have I done now?"

Lines are open? Who are we not voting for?

I forget who I hate the most.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:09:58

Chris is stupid. I want Amy. <pouts>

District 3 are the Baby Shits?

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:10:19

Lines are open now so give us your fucking money.

jaffacakehips Sat 06-Oct-12 20:10:23

God he's going to be really really annoying!

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:11:03

Hi - DH is out so I have the sofa to myself and an evening of x factor and crochet.... Can I join you? Thought the stage was going to fall down with all the fake shakes going on a minute ago....

Kai! <dies>. He looks like a study of Alan Cummings done in brown.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:11:15

Hello everyone, against my better judgement I'm going to watch the live shows.

Dermot looked so uncomfortable doing his little Dance!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:11:27

What are we voting for?!

I would like my predictions from the other thread noted. You all owe me a pound for every one I get right <makes up rules>

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:11:58

Olympic Cash-in X Factor grin Gets better and better.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:12:04

ROFL at Alan Cumming done in brown

Raah! Help me- are these the Baby Shits now? Or is that the other crowd?

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:12:43

Louis has had a haircut and colour.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:13:00

Damn. I am a bit distracted cause trying to update iPad and do a million other stuff at same time.

Concentrate, Mme. Concentrate.

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:13:05

Louis got the hip young lads grin. He's one happy Louis tonight.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:13:12

No Sue, the babysits are UnionJ

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:13:17

They've just ripped their name straight from the Hunger Games surely!

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:13:24

What were these boys known as before dey woz famous? I'm sure it wasn't district 3.

'Oh my days'? Are they channeling Scarlett O Hara?

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:14:02

My child is still not asleep!

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:14:07

grrr- forgot to move my car back on the drive. Then i couldn't find my keys.

angry that IlovemyNan is through- what's with the totally over the top reactions? Agree he should be out tomorrow.

'Baby shits' would have been a better name.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:14:10

District3 should have called themselves Triple Anal.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:14:28

Oh, think they've just explained and I wasn't listening. Oops.

Are they, tutut? I thought we were going to enter our name, that's why I was confused.

This combination of young boys and Tina Turner must be BLOWING LOUIS' MIND.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:14:44

WTF are they doing??

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:06

Oof horrid harmonies

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:09

They're not singing this song properly if they're not staggering around the stage in fishnets and stilettos.

What the actual fuck is this? confused

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:14

Sue I think these are the Baby Shitsconfused

what exactly are they singing?
They have skipped the tune completely.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:15


Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:21

Bloody hell these are shit.

That one in the middle has no eye holes. How does he see out?

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:27

Eeek they've trashed it already

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:30

Urgh. Shoot me now.

VivaLeBeaver Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:32


HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:53


Natnat29 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:55

Fooking Awful oh dear

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:15:55

Methinks they should have spent less time picking a new shit name, and more time practicing.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:07

And im back in. Hello everyone, child asleep. What av i missed?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:07

Tearing my ears apart.

It could not be more banal.
Now there's a challenge to the rest of 'em.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:26

That was simply shocking.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:37

Triple Banal


MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:38

oooh, that was not good. Hated that

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:45

Crap, but they'll be nice coz they're first.

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:16:51

Jaysus, that was terrible.

You made that song your own BINGO!

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:00

Bland to say the least

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:12

'made that song your own' bingo!!
wtf has Tulisa got round her neck. Glad to see she is back to brunette, though.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:15

The judges, I mean.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:17

Pmsl at lack of eye holes grin

Yes they really made it their own... They made it shit!

Did Barry just call Tulisa, Tunisha?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:30

Honesty from Nicole?

Toonisha, eh?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:47


Natnat29 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:17:48

Bring back Simon he would have told them the truth

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:02

Harmonies beautiful?

Should've gone to Specsavers for hearing aids!

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:10

draahhcula I totally agree - much better as a brunette.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:12

Oh its alvin and the chipmunks. Wtf is nicole wearing?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:14

Louis loves the funk of young boys.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:18

'picking on song choice' BINGO!

No, Louis - they did it themselves? Made it turgid and dull all by their very own?

I hope you gave them a sticker.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:18:48

Did they listen to a differnwg performance to us?! hmm

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:19:08

BTW <nods to BIWI> I'm doing this sans wine...

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:19:34

My sons mates are in a band called District 6.
They took the name about five years ago, played Guilfest and a few other decent gigs - starting to get a name for themselves

All for nowt now.

Me too sans wine, I always am. I am very much NOT sans tea and chocolate <hides from BIWI>

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:19:53

ooh, goody, ad breakhmm

can get a drink now!

tuttutitlookslikerain why specsavers?

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:20:56

lorelilee me too. Might be a mistake. Have a wine with me!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:22:13

Well that was boring. I want Rylan in sparkly fishnets next pls.

Onoes Pag. Could they start an alternative Twatter campaign - they're District SIX, they're twice as good grin granted not saying much

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:23:15

No matter what we think of him, Rylan will not be boring!

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:23:54


Possible. Has potential.
They are pretty good tbh but being linked with tousle haired moppets will not be their thing at all.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:23:58

I've got naice nuts if anyone wants to share?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:24:19

I hope Rylan turns up in sparkly fishnets.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:24:29

Just 'cause they say "should have gone to Specsavers"on the adverts, and they do hearing aids and Nicole obviously couldn't hear their harmonies were dire. That's all.smile

I should think this lot will die a death tbh, there is only so much money teen girls can spend. And the Wandies have it.

Speak of the devils. Why are Wand Erection here, pleaseandthanks?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:25:35

Harry Styles looks quite dried out, doesn't he? Like he spent a bit too long in the oven.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:25:43

If Rylan is doing 'Gold' i envisage a gold lycra creation. Hot pants, a la Kylie.

Ooh, it's the Wandies


Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:25:49

Cheers Make wine.

Sue chocolate may make an appearance later.

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:26:07

<< Squeal >> confused

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:26:36

Liam has always looked like the odd one out. Why has he shorn his hair? Nits?

I have M&S Swiss chocolate. It's lovely.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:26:49

Go away Wand Erection!

DS1's friend who is 18 was in Tesco this week, getting really excited about buying the Sun, so he could collect the tokens to go see them live! I stood there like this shock I thought only little girls liked them!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:27:08

He's secretly enrolled at Sandhurst.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:27:13

Fuck me, this is dull

Oh it's Shane McGlasses.

VivaLeBeaver Sat 06-Oct-12 20:27:17

What was the point in one direction there?

tuttut ahh ok just wondered!

Why are one direction on already?!

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:05

Oh wait, James is 'lidder-rully' living his dream.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:07

I've got crumpets. And vodka.

Now that is very rock'n'rollgrin

VivaLeBeaver Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:33

Tokens to see them live? Dd wants to see them and the tickets are £££

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:33

Am I the only one who couldn't pick most of 1D (arf) out in a lineup? I have to check if Harry is there.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:41

eeeurghhhh. What was that strangled noise?

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:41

Whats the theme this week?

beachyhead Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:50

Sorry, just got in from the pub...... who got the wildcard?

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:52

I've got opiates!

Oh, he's lost his specs. Do you think Deirdre Barlow demanded them back?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:28:59

Draahhcula, dip the crumpets in the vodka.

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:05

Harry's the only one I know, because he's the only one in Heat.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:17

One Direction might as well have carried a banner saying 'it'll be bollocks this year as well'

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:18

LOVE him, so much emotion in his voice.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:21

cardiac Chris did Beachy!

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:30

Hmm. Not good really, is he?

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:44

Not a bad song, not bad singing, but no ooomph.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:46

<sulks> i want opiates.

Ohhh, he's the rap guy...

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:49

beachy it was Gazza

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:56

Quite like James, his face doesn't match his tats tho'..

Bad song choice

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:56

The weight of the glasses and eyeliner combined was too much, the glasses had to go.

Oh, he can rap. How original.

Natnat29 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:29:58

This is a bit better

You know this rapping lark? Is it just saying anything that vaguely rhymes, but doing it fast and crossly?

DebbieTitsMcGee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:22

Is it true that Leona is shagging Bob Mortimer from 1D? And if so why?????

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:29

Yes, Sue.

I love James but this is not a good choice of song for him sad

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:36

It ran from Saturday last week, Viva, it was collect tokens then see them for £9.50!

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:41

I may soak the crumpets in vodka, see if it makes them puff up. Like an experiment.

Bored? Me?

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:44

I liked that.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:50

I like him but wish he'd stick to one note at a time.

Overall though was definitely the best so far grin

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:51

Rap? Really? Odd choice....

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:30:57

Sue nails rap.

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:24

Can I join in please? I have no crumpets, no M&S swiss chocolate, but I might have a cup of tea in a minute if I can be bothered to get off the sofa... I might even push the boat out and get wine... grin

Is it just me who thinks James Arthur looked better before? (most of them looked better before... )

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:25

shittingit the topic tonight is Olympic Heroes!!

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:31

<offers round stash of codiene>
Yeah, it wasn't awful. It wasn't great.

Thank you alma. I am beginning to catch up then.

Isn't he a funny tiny headed man, when you look at the whole of him? he looks like that kid's game where you match up different body parts with hilarious consequences.

ZiggyPlayedGuitar Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:41

Sorry to butt in but you all have to support James Arthur cos he's from my home town and used to be in a band with my ex!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:43

Let us know if your crumpets swell, draahhcula.

sailorsgal Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:49

He get my vote. cos he's from the boro

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:31:57

He made it his own.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:32:07

I liked him but he is a bit [meh] now. Gazza is right.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:32:28

Bob mortimer grin

i want to know how Tulisa has gone from brassy blonde, to dark brown in a week, without the pink interim bit? bitter experience

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:32:38

He made it his own....oh fuck off.

I make every song my own - because no-one is shitter than me

Agree with Gary. Thought he was a bit boring.

Moln Sat 06-Oct-12 20:32:49

What have the done to him?

Nothing matches with him

(DH keeps turning over so missed the actual song)

If making it his own translates as boring the very tits off me, then he so did.

Why is shitsinger trilling TRACK? Does it mean something?

I fear I am lost already.

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:12

I didn't know there was a pink interim bit. But her hair will look like straw soon at this rate.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:15

I would like one of those consequences games for the judges. You could have Louis' head on Tulis(h)a's body and all sorts.

ZiggyPlayedGuitar Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:31

Oh and he's not from fucking Middlesbrough he's from saltburn...massive difference!

Thewidewideworld Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:43

DD wants to call shit boyband One Dimension.

I want James Arthur's eyelashes. They are amazing!

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:48

James Arthur got a touch of the Alan Carrs (lookswise)

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:33:52

snot her hair dRaahhcula!

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:04

grin at Buxton.
Yes. I make every song absoloutely shite my own too

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:11

DS is calling her Smellany

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:24

Her daughters are just beautiful.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:24

I thought he was over 28! He must have had a hard paper round!

Here's MelanieMN.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:29

Bloody huuuge hair, Janet devlins mum.

I bet they send Melanie home this week. She'll be bottom two and they'll make it sound as if they're doing her a favour as she misses her kids.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:38

That little girl has amazing hair!

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:44

Ooh look, a full ten seconds before they mentioned her kids.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:46

shitslinger would like to remind us that she can Sibby apparently by rhyming off the "tarrack"!

Hope Melanie is good I quite like her edge smile

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:34:48

I LOVE that little girl's red hair.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:14

Is Tulisa's hair a wig?grin That would explain itgrin

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:21

He's from Saltburn? Hardly the bloody Boro!

sailorsgal Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:36

ziggy that's interesting because in the auditions I thought I recognised his dad and I'm from Redcar.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:39

Dd reckons she is the girl from brave grin

cheesymonster Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:39

Aah I love Gary

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:44

She's like a little Marianne Faithful.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:48

Woodstock revival

VivaLeBeaver Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:50

She's like a female Robert Plant.

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 20:35:57

Top comment from the Barlow about James Arthur.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:01

Now, come on Barry- as obvious song choices go- this is way up there..

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:03

Another bingo comment from Louis there - "we've found a recording artist". I'm sure he says that to every contestant at some point, surely.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:04

A chiffon waterfall cardi! Whatever next?

They've dressed her in EVERY bit of patchouli-smelling hippy shit they found in Wardrobe. She had an astrakhan coat, but the lights made it smell too ripe.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:16

70's rock chick, hope she reigns it a bit, tendancy to screech.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:31

Haha. Sponsored by Per Una.

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:36


EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:38

Is she wearing a wigwam?

Just joining with wine and Asda mint thins smile

Late again.

Why did 1D come on, wave, then walk off again? That was weird.

I do not like curly hair lady's song, though I do like her.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:52

At least she can sing!

I reckon it's 90% extenshuns drac!

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:54

Christ, she has a good voice!

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:36:59

so does my DH

She wants Melanie to win cause of her DD

I want her to win cause she has an amazing voice. Is a bit screechy for my tastes tonight.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:00

grin at Sue!

I am now a fan of Melanie!

redandyellowbits Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:03

I love Melanie. The song is a bit too old for the audience though.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:05

No this isn't great. I like her though.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:07

Ooh wasn't that the theme for the wonder years?

Quite disappointing really there's only so many times they can get her to screech out before it gets predictable...

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:07

Ok no reigning it in, its a all a much.

Thewidewideworld Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:07

Hate this song wtf has it got to do with Olympics bit tenuous innit

She's like a non-decomposed Janis Joplin.

KiwiKat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:34

Wow that woman can belt it out!

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:39

Fine set of pipes there!

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:37:41

Well, she beat the arses off the first two there!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:00

Haha soul child

Fairyjen Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:27

2 dd's? I thought one was a boy!

VivaLeBeaver Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:35

Is Louis reading MN?

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:36

it was predictable, though, Barry.

And Louis is reading this thread on his phone.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:36

Louis remembers all the boys at Woodstock all right.

Bollocks were you at Woodstock. Louis. Unless you mean Woodstock, Co.Sligo.

VBisme Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:39

Very 60's theme to her costume as well

Onetwothreeoops Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:40

Is Louis reading this thread?

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:49

Definitely the best so far. And she's very beautiful.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:53

Hi all! Sorry to be so late - dd had to see Merlin.

Just saw the end of this song, have I missed something good?

JambalayaCodfishPie Sat 06-Oct-12 20:38:57

I think Nicole Sherzinburger is going to be the final nail in my x-factor coffin. sad

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:39:10

I think nerves might have caused her to over egg it a bit. But she can sing.

Thank Christ Tulisa has dyed her hair.

I do like Gary, he's so masterful [swoon]

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:39:25

I was peanut. Not quite so rocky though!

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:39:36

Louis must have seen my comment! wink

Thewidewideworld Sat 06-Oct-12 20:39:49

DD on Nicole She shouldn't be allowed to say words.

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:39:50

Haha @ Louis reading MN....

I like Melanie. I think they will need to tone down the frequency of the screeching, but she can certainly sing! (of course, I am an expert.... )

VBisme Sat 06-Oct-12 20:40:01

she terrified!poor love

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:40:02

What makes you think Louis is reading the thread?

I think Melanie should get the MN vote. But do any of us vote? I just bitch.

Has the Wild Card been voted for yet? (on phone, can't scroll up to start of thread sorry!)

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:40:41

I've been to The Woodstock. It's a pub in Didsburygrin

Fairyjen Sat 06-Oct-12 20:40:55

Is Louis lurking on this thread?

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:40:58

lol at Louis 'watched Woodstock on TV'

Mr Shaky got it, Ivor. We're not happy.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:41:16

Lucy looked petrified. I can't with Tulisa, up her own bottom.

JambalayaCodfishPie Sat 06-Oct-12 20:41:25

she shouldn't be allowed to say words


Why is Nicole sitting in Gary's chair??

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:41:32

Ivor- Christopher 'i love my nan/serial killer/Scouser' got through. Sadly. Though there wasn't much competition.

I used to live very near to Woodstock.

In Oxfordshire grin.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:41:45

Oh, I see! grin (I have this little fantasy that he reads our threads and counts how many times he called a twat!)

Oh not lovely Amy? Stupidness!

Fairyjen Sat 06-Oct-12 20:41:58

lottie you clearly has a stalker here.

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:42:11

Gary can't be that masterful Ivor, Shirties nicked his chair.

Naah no voting here Sue, i save my pennies for chocolate smile

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:42:12

As it's the ads, please could you just provide me with some crucial scientific data here?

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:42:17

DS2 voted for Janet multiple times last year. He isn't watching it this year, so I shan't be voting, unless Caridac Chris is in the final then I'll vote for the other person!

Yeah, toppo has it, Hassled you fecking loon


LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 20:43:14

I was being ironic re Louis...........When she first started singing i posted WOOODSTOCK!!! Then Louis mentioned it!! wink

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:43:32

I don't vote. I hate them all indiscriminately :D

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:44:18

I never vote, just like a good bitch.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:44:27

Ivor it's Mr Super tan scouser!

Well I've eaten my lasagne, it was delicious! All home made (no cheat sauces!). Plenty kft, anyone want some?

TheregoesBod Sat 06-Oct-12 20:44:30

Omg...did you notice, Louis comments started with Woodstock, then Robert Plant, then Janis Joplin ....exactly as written on here during curly haired mums song ? I think he's reading mumsnet on his screen...
(Disclaimer, Using lots of wine to dull the pain of watching)

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:44:40

Thanks Lottie - I managed to read up a bit in the ads.

Ach Jelly he's masterful but still male, he's blinded to Shitslinger's vaccuous idiocy by her shiny hair and fluttery flase lashes. I am wearing a dressing gown with pot noodle stains on the bosom. He probs would not give me his chair sad

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:45:04

Faith - I want some kft

YouSmegHead Sat 06-Oct-12 20:45:26

Only way shell get anywhere

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:45:29

Top lip for sure.

FWIW I used to be a dental nurse (qualified and everything) and injections at the front of the mouth hurt more at the top than the bottom.

Should have put that on the other thread really. blush

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:45:30

<passes over a big plateful> salad?

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 20:45:31

Oh she's singing her own song! I like her hope it goes ok?

Is it fair she gets to this?

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:00

I made some, um, interesting jam turnovers. Peach jam, home-made pastry. Any takers?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:11

No salad. It adulterates the cheesy, meaty goodness.

Oh she's like a little Pam Ayres.

Eeee, right northern and down t't'earth, she is. By 'eck. Keeping it right real.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:30

This could be a great move. or a really rubbish one.

Don't let the crap stylist dress her.

scaredycat12 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:33

Can someone explain what those dirty mark type things on Tulisa's neck are? Does she have a birthmark?

TheregoesBod Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:49

blush sorry, bit slow

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:46:51

Louis, if you are reading

You are a TWAT



Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:24

I think she does Scaredy.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:25

I like this girl but she isn't really singing...

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:25

This isn't exactly singing.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:33

I am missing the cider to accompany X factor. Only time I have wanted to drink since getting diffed!

I like Lucy but I don't think she'll last long.

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:41

She's like a little George Formby

<tests Louis>

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:42

Cross posts c shitting

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:47

Aye, go on jux I'll try one.

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:52

Spot on Sue will we get Dolly On The Dustcart to the guitar?

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:47:57

They can't really say 'not sure about the song choice' or 'made the song your own' to this, can they?

She looks awful with so much make-upsad

I'm sorry but I don't believe that an old lady said the half of this.

<goes all Jezza> GET OFF MY STAGE.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:16

scaredy fake tan?,

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:22

Not seeing the point of this one...

Natnat29 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:23

This isn't really x factor shes more britains got talent, not hot the voice to be on x factor

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:30

No she isn't sad

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:41

Thank you Mme!

May I reiterate?

Louis, for example, is a twat.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:42

Arf @ Mme grin


I blame you for Westlife. I can never forgive you.


almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:48:56

God sue you're so aggressive z SHE IS EXPRESSING HERSELF, INNIT.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:03

Not sure about that one, really.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:04

Sue grin

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:08

Boring and basically tawkin all douwn to erf...

Total Kate Nash rip off, and I can't stand her!

I think it's such a shAmerican this one was picked over Amy. She is good but not for a show like this.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:27

I loved Westlife!

She has far too much make up on!

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:41

Go for it Buxton. I've got loads quite a few.

Shame. Fucking auto correct.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:47

How fucking insincere is Shitsinger?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:49:49

Nicole doesn't know what spunky means. Louis does

So she's minted now - presumably she gets royalties from the downloads?
She could buy Rylan a gold handbag.

seriously Louie?

lighthousekeeping Sat 06-Oct-12 20:50:13

That was boring

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:50:16

It was a bit errmm...

I like her but it's a bit of a disappointment

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 20:50:16

Yes she is very Nash.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:50:25

you said that at the same time as Louis, Peanut. Or were you first?

I am aggressive.

Did Louis nick my Victoria Wood crack too? I've been hawking that one since week one, Louis, you robbing bastard.

Meh. That was boring.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:50:58

Kate Nash was definitely mentioned here first!

Oooh oooh MK1! Sqeeeeeeeaaaaaaalll! I like them!

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 20:51:23

Er, but the thing is, this week's theme is Heroes. So does that mean that Lucy's hero is herself? confused

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:51:45

Whatever happened to Kate Nash?

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:51:49

That was a bit boring, sadly - I loved her audition songs, but this was a bit meh. And another bloody advert break???

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:51:49

Right, if Louis refers to Gazza as Gazza, we will KNOW

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:51:55

I said someone was spunky the other day, my kids fell about laughing! A bit like the time DFIL said there was smeg in the butter! That time they had to go to the toilet together!

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 20:52:04

Hmmm, am I the only one just passing the time till Rylan comes on?

I think her hero was the made up old lady in the song, showtune. Or something.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:52:29

Damn I've just outed myself...

my name is Louis Walsh and I have a boy band fetish grin

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:52:43

Or was the old laydee a hero?

Tutt - why does your butter have smeg in it?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:53:21

She was not made up, sue. How very dare you.

Ooh I'm drumk!

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:53:31

It wasn't mine Ivor, it was MIL's!

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:53:41

i have butter in my smeg

actually it's a samsung

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:53:48

I have butter in my smeg grin

The old lady that went up a mountain in ecuador or somesuch.
Bit off really, it should ha' been On Ilkla Moor Baht 'at

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:54:39

Aah x post draaahcula grin

And I lied, I have a Samsung!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:55:00

"I've been to Venezuela, Peru and Ilkley Moor"

I think it works.

This clarifies nothing! Your MILs butter or your MILs smeg? confused

I feel that this deserves an entirely new thread of its own! I need answers!

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:55:25

But smeggy butter sounds unsanitary!
<<wrings hands>>

See, we need Bof to ask Shiney if ITV1 minions are lurking again. And pinching our jokes. <deluded>

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 20:55:39

I wish I were drunk.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:56:10

Oh, ffs. it's Psycho's nanhmm

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:56:18

It's his fucking nan. She's alive!

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 20:56:21

Sue - I've been wondering that ever since Shiney first said they were following us at ITV grin. Go one Dermie - give us a sign.

Oh I have such a crush on this girl from MK1, I want to beeeeeeeeeeeeeee her

Primark One! Huzzah.

Lizzen very carefully, they will sing this only once. And prolly be out tomorrow night.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:56:33

Me too jux, me too. May have to console myself with the chocolate sundae in the fridge.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:01

What is with these baseball caps with big visor bits? <old>

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:02

Oh not again, these two annoy me!

She is dappy with a minge...

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:05

It actually had toast crumbs in, which DFIL called smeg for some reason. As you can imagine that made 2 teenage boys nearly die with laughter, and me BTW but that's beside the point!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:28

They should have kept the Louis Theroux-a-like

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh ok.

I wonder what he calls actual smeg?

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:51

'we are here for the music' only works if you are playing in a bar in Manchester. Not if you have entered Xf.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:52

peanut, if Louis quotes that one....

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:55

It was MIL's butter!

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:57:59

Dappy with a minge

<cries a bit>>

I am a little bit drunk.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:10

lol at Dappy with a minge

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:11

Oh good- they turned off her mic. Good call.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:38

Ooh - they're giving 100%! Putting everything into it..... I just want someone to come on and say they are tired and thinking of only giving 75% today.

Natnat29 Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:41

Worse x factor ever

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:41

Are the bins meant to be.... street?

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 20:58:42

Oh. My. Ears.

God, I'd do Louis Theroux till his glasses steamed but I didn't like Mr33%. he was creepy.

Now, rhyming random words angrily = more rapping. I'm getting the hang of this.

These two are shit.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 20:59:13

Ok. Not quite drunk enough.
Fuck this is bad.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 20:59:19

Are they doing the grease dance?

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 20:59:25


almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 20:59:29

Only 100%?

Rubbish. Simon Cowell would have demanded at least 110%

Ooo-er, her voice is a little off

You can tell the dancers are all street cos they're doing the Claggy Dance.

OMG, I JUST recognised the song in the last line grin

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:02

Thompson twin girl is bad, and not in a good way

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:05

It's a fecking mash-up!

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:06

Is her outfit rather..1990? And the kind of things you'd have seen on a boy?

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:06

Those jeans hanging round the knees - they piss me off. I am getting old.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:06


Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:06

If Louis does mention smeggy butter in a minute, we know he is definitely following the thread!grin

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:11

This is dire. I'm sure everyone we've seen so far was heaps better in their first audition than they've been tonight.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:25

Im too old for this shit. Dis is for da yoofs

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:28

What was the song?

I do not think Tulisa is pretty at all. She looks like the back of a knee.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:49

Oh, they were BAD

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:00:52

They were doing the claggy shake, weren't they?grin

WTF, urban, Dullisa? So the rest are all rural?

YY, Faith, i've not seen yellow Cats since 1996 grin

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:01:02

Some people have to luhern, some people wait their tuhern?

I don't understand, does she have hiccups?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:01:27

The yoot like them.

lighthousekeeping Sat 06-Oct-12 21:01:35

It's dire. I can't even get drunk ive only got 1 bottle of wine and I've got Keith Lemmon on Million Pound Drop Live to get through.


shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:01:51

ivor muhahahahaha

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:05

This group was asked to audition for the X Factor, apparently. They already have a record label, whatever that means.

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:11

The new NDubz? But with a minge, Louis!

grin arf at she look like the back of a knee

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:20

Peanut, the next line goes "vote for Bertie Aherne"

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:20

Louis just nicked everyone else's comments there! Cheeky bugger....

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:39

she still reminds of this Thomson twins

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:02:40

Where was the fucking minge?

You know what actually is in MK1? The centre of Milton Keynes. Roundabouts, a cinema complex and the concrete cow statues.

That's right urban, that. Fecking street.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:12

Gosh, there we were putting Stronghold on the cats' necks, when the TV stopped. Once all three animals had realised exactly how much they hated us, I saw a message saying Pause Live TV. I didn't know we had live tv. I didn't know we could pause it either.

It's unpaused now.

I think that's the most excitement I've ever experienced during X Factor. Ever ever ever ever ever. grin

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:12

Oh god here we go.

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:14

Tulisa isn't pretty, no. She's just been in a movie or summat so the mens like her.

I'll watch him but keep forgetting to email him to tell him he needs that green stuff on his face from Boots.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:15


DD just looked at me and said 'that was shit'

I ought to send her to bed but somehow I have to concur.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:18

H here comes fucking gazza, he better not start crying! Stop it, just fucking stop it!

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:20

it was excruciating for us, barry...

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:25

I would never, ever tire of slapping Tulisias face

Bloody Christopher now, looking like a tartan scotch egg. Angry...

This one needs to get a bloody grip.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:36

Oh, and Louis is a twat.

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:45

COME ON CHRISTOPHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

squishyotter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:47

Will Chris cry?

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:54

He is reading this isn't he? I can imagine him secretly MNetting!

There's no getting away from it. He's just so orange.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:03:54

Is shakey guy the neediest contestant ever?

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:01

He really does need a big giant grip handed to him.

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:01

Pmsl Alma!

I swear that man is an oompa loompa on steroids!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:06

Yes he will cry

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:09

His teef are like radioactive!

It was jeffing excruciating all round.

ROAR at the leg flick when he hugs Bazza. oo la la

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:37

Have all the men had eyelash extensions?

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:42

Oh go away!

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:42

Predictable song choice!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:43

Quite like his voice though

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:04:46

Oh cruise ship/karaoke agogo.

I loathe this song for many, many reasons.

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:08

Karaoke me up!

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:22

Lottie how many times did you vote for him to get the wild card eh?!

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:28

Mariah Carey being one of those reasons?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:29


BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:41

Aha, so that's what happened to Mariah Carey...

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:42

Ah, now, I disagree with the lot of you about Tulisa - she's my secret girl crush. much to DH's delight

How did I forget this song?

Nice that he's dressed up. Nothing at all like karaoke after work on a Friday night.

<shudder> at the menacing walk across the stage.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:52

He's singing this with no feeling whatsoever.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:59

He should duet with Jane McDonald.

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:05:59

He's a goner. Next!

Hs he got a packet of fags in his pocket? grin

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:05

How old is your DD, Pagwatch?

Mine is falling asleep right now. She and DS went rambling with my mum today.

Damn, but he can sing. Still don't like him, but he got a hold on his nerves and is doing well.

Fuck me this song must be the biggest load of gash ever recorded

I fucking hate it

It is even worse when it's being strangled by the colour orange

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:22

I love Christopher!! there i have said it!!!!! smile

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:25

Has he had micro dermabrasion, skin looks smoother. Shit song choice.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:26

He looks like he sells used cars.

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:28

I hate this guy, he's so boring. I would have liked the young girl to get voted on.


Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:30

It's a bit cruise ships, wink

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:32

tsk, barry- and you have the nerve to call other's predictable.

G'wan Louis, say thatgrin

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:43

Am glad I watched Merlin instead of the first half of this. At least there was totty. This is dire.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:46

Boring, but they will all love it.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:48

Awful song. Bad diction. "There's a nanser" eg.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:06:56

I just did a little bit of sick. That was vomit-inducing. Urgh again.

Right leg. Fags. Let's hope he gets so nervous he sparks one.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:19

She is 10 now. Not as bad as when she said twat when she was 4.

'twas cheesy. Nicole is right.

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:28

There's totty in Merlin?! shock

sailorsgal Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:36

I had that hairstyle of the Thompson Twins.

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:44

I agree with Shitslinger, it was cheesier than a cheese toastie

Oh they're fucking with us now. Cruise ship grin

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:47

makehay, no he's not the neediest...

Jarmaine (or whatever his name is) wins that crown surely?

I hate the meek, nervous and shy act.

Cheesey?? Yes because the pussy cat dolls were all class hmm

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:47

Oh and i voted three times!!! and Miaowwwwwwwwwwwwwww at Louis!!!

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:49

Lous is a MUMSNETTER!!!!!

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:50

Youbroke, yes half naked totty too.grin

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:50

Cruise ship!

Louis is a mner. fACT!

Right, which one of you is Louie Walsh?

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:57

Ooh, Louis must be watching... grin

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:07:59

CRUISE SHIP. Louis is genuinely being fed this stuff by producers who are reading the thread.

It's like they're trying to speak to us grin

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:08:46

I know. Who knew? Gratuitous it was. Get ye to the iPlayer.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:08:49

We need a code.
Say smorgasbord Louis

<<realises this is like a ouija trick>

BuxtonTheBlueCat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:08:52

Fucking cruise ship!!

Louis, I would have called you a twat, but now I know you are a MNer...

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:08:53

I am starting to like Louis grin


MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:08:53

Same as DD. She doesn't use words like 'twat', having been brought up abroad.

lol at no more sunbeds.

Is Barry reading this too? shock

lighthousekeeping Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:00

Just cos you enjoy cruising, Louis.....

Onetwothreeoops Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:09

No more sunbeds!!! Hahahaaaaaaa

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:16

I'm lactose intolerant and just broke out in hives from the cheese that was just on screen.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:19

Yes say smorgasbord.

I vote for Christopher's nan. I hope she wins.

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:32

Is Dermot really small or is Cruiship and quiff really tall?

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:09:37

Smor -gas -bord!
C'mon Louis

We believe!

Oh, they've wheeled Nan in. And she's brought half of Gala with her.

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:14

The union jack faced girl playing pianos good tho

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:20

pmsl @ we believe


showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:21

Dermot is fairly tiddly at 5 foot 7.5. grin

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:30

Hey, thanks ladies...

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:33

grin at your dd saying twat, pagwatch - I'm glad it's not just mine (heard "fucks sake" coming from her 3yo mouth while we were lost on birmingham station the other day....oops!)

I hate these chocolate finger adverts, they weird me out

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:51

If Louis says smorgasbord, I might stop calling him a twat.

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:10:57

Omg there's an hour left. I'm going to have to get more wine.

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:01

I am Louis Walsh.

Mymumsdaughter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:03

How can someone who did 15 years on cruise ships be that nervous shaky and crying.

TerrorNotSoFrightened Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:07

OMG Louis is MNing whilst on xfactor.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:20

D could have been brought up in outer Mongolia. She got twat from me unfortunately.
I thought, until shockingly recently, that it was just a derivative of twit.

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:35

I think you will find that I am, smoulder

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:39

I think someone should ring into the Xtra Factor and ask Louis if he is a secret MNetter!

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:44

Very easily mymumsdaughter, the first few years of my career I used to throw up before I went on stage.

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:11:47

Wow I'm taller than Dermot!

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:12:02


(I had 4 exclamation marks there, but deleted cause of Chaos's thread)

LottieJenkins Sat 06-Oct-12 21:12:19

I seem to have started something with Louis being on here!!

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:12:21

If he says smorgasbord I will love him and i will feel like The Hand Of God. A bit

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:12:24

IMPOSTER <shrieks>

That's cos you'd never dined at my grandpa's, Pag. He announced some time ago, at complete random, 'Did ya know twat means vagina? HA! TWAT!'. That was an interesting dinner.

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:12:52

Dermot's pretty good looking in real life though. He used to go to the cocktail bar I used to go to. [weeps a little weep for my pre-DD life]

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:02

Mymum- he looks like he may have been a drag act that is probably not true . Dressing up as his nan calmed his nerves. maybe grin

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:21

The Hand Of Pag. Truly it giveth and it taketh away.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:22

If he says smorgasbord, then MN might well explode.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:23

Hahaha @ dinner at grandpas

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:24

No, it is really me. Honest. grin

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:27

I'm off to make a cuppa soup, can't decide between pea and ham or szechaun?

LotsofDots Sat 06-Oct-12 21:13:31

Am having to watch on catch up, following DD1 insisting on staying up to watch some SCD which then had to be paused yadadada. Anyhow, will probably catch up With you all before the end....

Shit. I forgot I took my icecream out the freezer an hour ago.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:05

If Louis says smorgasbord I'll pee my pants! smile

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:05

Who is this imposter? I am Louis. See me fiddling under the desk? That's mostly me Mning.

KiwiKat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:07

How creepy is that Costa ad?!

No no... His hairline makes him look like a Fisher Price man

DH is 5'5 and would be very upset to be described as short deluded

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:18

Pmsl @ we believe...

Is that like peter pan where they have to clap and believe in fairies to keep tink alive?

Not that I'm insinuating Louis is a dying fairy or nowt..

does anyone else have the creepy Costa ad on? With the singing heads on the ground!

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:28

Say smorgasbord. Please.

Jellykat Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:34

G'wan Louis, betcha can't shoehorn in a SMORGASBORD grin

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:43

if he mentions Westshoite...

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:14:55

Here come my boys. A smorgasbord of talent.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:16

<i realise Louis mentioning Westshoite won't really prove anything>

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:19

He so can, when they ask Louis about how tonight has been he can say it's been a smorgasbord of talent. G'wan Louis, SAY IT!

midori1999 Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:22

Oh, please let Louis say Smorgasbord... please... grin

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:31

No, I am Louis Walsh.

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:32

Calling me a dying fairy?

Oh, I can't keep this up. Tis I, LeClerc (see hoverererer)

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:35

Louis and his boys... Hmm

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:44

If you are Louis how the feck do I ever know who's who? Westlife and Boyzone are the same to me? confused

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:47

The trouble we had getting them on and off those fecking stools...

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:51

It's a bit of a challenge though. I may have over reached.
Although 'a smorgasbord of talent' would work. Or a smorgasbord of style and energy'
Is it too hard for him?

<bites nails>

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:15:55

DH is short too, but funnily enough I didn't even notice till someone else said something about it. He is a mini George Clooney

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:07

It's menat to be smile

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:22

Secretly they hate the interlopergrin

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:26

Did they just have a carafe of Coke on the table grin

He sure do catch 'em young. Oi, Producers of Louis! Say MOIST. Gwan.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:38

Oh, ouch sad

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:46

Argh my ears are bleeding

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:47


MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:50

A smorgasbord of voices, cheesing together in harmony.

Gwan, Louis.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:56

Keep Caroline Flack away from this lot.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:16:59

Oh, would you say these guys are a smorgasbord of talent?

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:01

Ok the second singer was better.

Katiekitty Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:04

The smorgasbord thing reminds me of that film Capricorn One - when the astronauts are trying to get a coded message across on the live link.

I bet a pound Louis says the S-word...

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:20

This is awful. A smorgasbord of shite.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:22

Ouch. Their caterwauling just woke ds.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:23

OMG the dancers.

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:24

Oh Lawks, bad start. And the only sexy Queen song by any stretch of the imagination and they've given it to a group with four pubes between them.

You're a racing car? You're a fecking joke sweetie. Soz and all.

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:25

There go my ears again. That's no smorgasbord of talent.

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:25

Smorgasbord of shite, more like.

EnjoyGOLDResponsibly Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:41

I sing this better when I'm gasping for breathe after 30 minutes on a running machine

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:17:58

Oh fucking hell. This is why people shouldn't sing Queen songs. There's only ONE Freddie.

The second singer sounds like Mark from Westlife.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:01

I think these are better than the first boy band, whose name I can't even remember!

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:04

I can't hear this song without remembering walking in on a 17 year old DS1 dancing alone to it in the kitchen. I've never seen anyone quite as red.

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:08

Alma beat me to it.

Thank god for autocorrect. I can't fucking spell smorgasbord.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:10

Hmm, tuning issues.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:26

oh dear. Flat, tuneless, and worst of all IT'S QUEEN.

I hate Queen. I say it every yeargrin


sailorsgal Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:35

George is a cutie but looks about 10.

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:38

Smorgasbrot with Flaatbrod

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:40

Someone stop them now. Please.

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:41

Fuck off with the fucking crappy prancing dancing pratty dancers. Spoils it.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:49

I suspect that unless you're Freddie, it's best not to sing his songs.

This boy band sounds like all the rest!!

JambalayaCodfishPie Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:51

Louis clearly hates them. So why did he put them through?!?!

Hassled Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:54

They are better than the first smorgasbord of shite, in fairness.

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:56

Nicole, PLEASE tell them they were flat.

YouBrokeMySmoulder Sat 06-Oct-12 21:18:58

<wails> we've run out of Baileys. What a time for that to happen.

TerrorNotSoFrightened Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:06

I bet he says they are a smorgasbord of talent.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:10

I agree Showtunes

squishyotter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:11

Hassled grin

Please tell us more juicy details :D

magentastardust Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:14

Tulisa looks rough tonight !

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:16

Erm... Are the girls there to make out look like that's why Louis has a raging Wanger right now?

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:19

Gwan Louis. We can feel your presence.

The kid in black is by far the best singer in that froup

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:26

Wait for it...

SoleSource Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:33

Poor Lois they are always picking on him.

Dermot is fucking shit

A fucking Queen song ruined!!!!

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:47

Which one is George, sailor?

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:56

lol Hassled.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:19:59

Ooh real comments from the judges!

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:07

Everyone agrees, Louis, for example, is a twat.

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:20

This is classic Louis. He so sabotages the acts he hates so that he can work with the ones he likes.

Vagaceratops Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:34

We are a bit behind but I just want to say that this isnt the first time in Xfactor history that someone has sung their own song - Chico did it.

CuriousMama Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:35

Bit late now Louis!

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:20:56

How was this about Heroes or the Lympics anyway?

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:21:06

Damn, I struggled there. Why are they all picking on me?

almapudden Sat 06-Oct-12 21:21:11

No smorgasbord sad

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:21:21

Oh yes - its Chico time!

magentastardust Sat 06-Oct-12 21:21:34

Yeah but I don't think Chico wrote his !

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:21:44

I'm serious, keep George away from the Flackster,

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:09

No he did! I'm sure he wrote it!

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:15

Why are they showing the hotel? Are they trying to whip up a rentacrowd outside?

peanutMD Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:16

She looks like a non airbrushed Beyonce.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:45

You would think that they could wheel the old twat off now, and bring in someone else to be a judge. Someone who isn't quite such a twat.

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:53

Roll out the daughter, doing the whole being parted from my daughter thang, has she mentioned she is a single mum yet?

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:58

Does anyone know why they are in a hotel and not a house this year?

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:22:59

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It%27s_Chico_Time He wrote SOME of it, not all of it.

lighthousekeeping Sat 06-Oct-12 21:23:33

I like Jade. I hope she can sing.

Bit pissed off at all the tears missing their kids- they knew they'd be away from them!!'

Jade 'carpet' Ellis

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:23:39

Oi, who keeps calling me a twat? I am here, you know.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:23:44

Is the sound really bad? i can't hear her at all?

LadyBeagleEyes Sat 06-Oct-12 21:23:52

I like her.
Fingers crossed she's not crap.

HaveALittleFaith Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:07

He certainly tried to take full credit for it!

Not the best song choice for her, she's done better.

Pagwatch Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:10

Dh just thought they announced JLS.
No jade ellis.

LouisAndHisWangOMeter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:12

Ooo look, she's shitting swallows.

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:20

I really like her.

IAmLouisWalsh Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:25

This is a bit nasal...

DontmindifIdo Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:30

sound doesn't seem right...

MmeLindor Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:33

What have they done to her? She was edgy. Don't like the curly hair.

Not a good song for her.

MakeHayNotStraw Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:40

I like jade's voice.

Jux Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:42

Why is she wearing red socks?

squishyotter Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:43

whats up with her mic

really quiet and echo-y

or is that in vogue style these days?

showtunesgirl Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:51

Song doesn't suit her. She sounds like a cut-price Rihanna.

dRaahhcula Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:51

Is that Tulisa's old hair?

Lorelilee Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:52

FAB boots.

Tuttutitlookslikerain Sat 06-Oct-12 21:24:54

I thought that Raaah.

I'd love a lot bit of Enrique.

This is shit

shittingit Sat 06-Oct-12 21:25:03

Jade looks good, not sure of this version.