Gypsy Matchmaker

[salsmum]

Did anyone watch this last night???? It focused on a man desperate to get his 14 year old son married to a girl of same age (for a dowry) this is the custom for Hungarian Gypsies. The family in the programme were keen to keep this tradition going in this country stating that a Gypsy child becomes an adult when they are 13/14 years old...the girl once married will move in with her husbands family where they are beaten taught to obey her husbands every wish ...It seems such a shame that they are expected to become 'adults' at such a young age. It was also quite creepy the way the Father kept harping on about the young girls virginity in front of her and the whole family. .

[DiaDuit]

I didnt see it but have seem the ad for it. Is it on ch4?

[salsmum]

Yes it was on 4 last night DiaDuit.

[frogmore6]

Do they ever have a bath?

[ProfYaffle]

I saw it. Esme's family were great weren't they? Also interesting the point that they suffer far less discrimination here then in Hungry.

[Candycrushblahblah]

I have just watched this on 47, it is fairly poignant that some of this was filmed in Rotherham. God! I feel sorry for the children. The dad Shanko was VILE, like a cross between Fagin and Papa Lazarou in "League of Gentlemen". I almost expected him to quote from article 8 of the Human Rights Act. I would like to see some of the more vociferous Mumsnetters come on this thread and hear their views on preserving this aspect of their "culture". I don't give a damn if this is their "tradition" it is a stinking, lousy, "tradition", like FGM which should be stamped on and stamped out. I make no apologies for this view, in a way they were fools to expose themselves to the C4 film crew because I am sure it will reinforces the prejudice against them as a minority, it has done them NO favours and Shanko and his mates need 10 weeks at "Feminist Bootcamp" IMHO

[IScreamForIceCream]

I watched it. It was really chilling, watching the boy (Adrian?) move between being a sweet young teen, to being a Shank in waiting.

NB they are specifically Roma gypsies, who lived in Hungary, so it was about Roma culture rather than Hungarian.

[IScreamForIceCream]

Being a Shanko in waiting I meant - ie becoming his dad.

[Trinpy]

I watched this on 4 seven tonight. Really sad to see another generation being brought up this way.

I visit Hungary at least twice a year and have had or witnessed several run-ins with gypsies. It's awful that the behaviour of some of them is perpetuating the racism against all of them.

[ProfYaffle]

I was thinking of the other thread about the people at Calais storming the ferry. Posters were wondering what makes the UK so attractive and I thought maybe our tolerance could be part of the answer. The woman with the guns and the big dogs talking about the gypsies was chilling.

As with all these things I also wonder just how representative these families are. Esme's Mother and Grandmother turned Shanko down saying the Gypsy way of marrying young wasn't good for the girls and they wanted Esme to have a good education.

[salsmum]

Esme was a beautiful young girl and I fully respected her family for not keeping with 'tradition' and marrying her off young despite pressure from that leering old man who tried to 'buy' her for his son....creepy!

[Rivercam]

This programme was fascinating. The hungarien's racism was sinister. In a strange way, the programme made me feel proud to be British, that the people felt safe here, despite occasional acts of violence.

seem was a pretty lass. Well done to her family for rejecting certain traditions.