Benefits street ep3

(119 Posts)

Anyone watching?

hickorychicken Wed 22-Jan-14 07:12:33

I disliked white dee from the offset, i grew up in a similar place and knew a woman like her, she was awful and her kids grew up to be bullies And criminals, she used to think of herself as the mum of the estate and thought people actually respected her grin .
On other threads about this show people have blamed bad editing showing these people in a bad light... well if you loook on google street view of that street becky is sat eating macdonalds in her front garden and black dee is sticking her fingers up at the googld car...cant blame THAT on editing! I do think they love their kids a lot they just need a bit of help.

nikkihollis Tue 21-Jan-14 23:44:14

Just watched this on iplayer. Beyond sad and bleak. As so many have said, it's not just about poverty - it's about ignorance and dependency - on nicotine, alcohol, drugs, the state.

I'm not British and although I've seen much more acute and unavoidable poverty - kids without shoes, minimal access to medical care, mucky because there's no running water in the home etc - I'm not used to seeing fit adults not working and children exposed to so much negativity. Being poor doesn't mean you automatically have to deprive your kids of sleep, adequate food. sufficient bathing or let them run around unsupervised in an area high in crime and substance abuse.

As the guy in tonight's episode said - if you don't work you don't eat. For a vast percentage of the world's population, that is a fact. I love the fact that the UK has a welfare system. At home. sick and disabled people often have to beg so they can support themselves, which is beyond terrible. The benefit system here though allows people to treat it as a way of life if they want to. Surely it is something you can fall back on if you lose a job, are sick or disabled or need it to supplement a low wage? I felt really sad for everyone on tonight's episode. There just seems to be total ignorance about basic nutrition, basic child rearing and an expectation that the state will and should provide.

rainydarkskies Tue 21-Jan-14 21:36:49

I still think White Dee has been edited heavily.

Mark and becky - blimey, sorry case there. Two people who aren't particularly attractive, bright or with any family support from what I could discern who just seemed so helpless. Just slumped, waiting for HV, for SS, for the government to step in and be their parent. They are parents but clearly need parenting themselves.

NinjaBunny Tue 21-Jan-14 21:07:24

Why did the camera men not intervene when White Dee was bellowing at her little boy and sending him out in the dark?

Maybe given him a hug when he was sobbing outside.

And got him some proper food, rather than that bit of chicken leg he was eating.

White Dee is the worst on the street.

angry

moondog Tue 21-Jan-14 20:50:49

It seems she had no qualms about stealing money destined for vulnerable people. Somewhat at odd with her champion of the proletariat persona.

Blondeshavemorefun Tue 21-Jan-14 20:46:18

and the couple with £3k rent arrears, again if they both stopped smoking then would have enough money to pay it back each week - bet they smoke 20 a day each, so £12 a day minimum brand depending, thats £84 aweek shock

Pixel Tue 21-Jan-14 19:13:01

Erm how do you do it when you live in a street filled with them and have limited outside space?

Er, you do what my mum did when I was little and we lived in a small flat in town, she took us to the park every day.

glammanana Tue 21-Jan-14 18:03:53

Nancy66 I'm with you with the fact that the children shouldn't be playing in the Street at their age,they where right near the Road and the mother sitting on the step what chance if they ran into the Road : no chance at all !!the mother could not even control the little boy when they went shopping why couldn't she put him on reins to stop him running off - simple solution in my mind, their parents are not that uneducated to clean up the disgusting front room prior to HV arriving so they must know the way things should be,and white Dee comes across to me as someone who knows "The System" inside out I was also shocked when I read she had been found guilty of stealing all that money when she was employed by the Council,I can't remember what the outcome was but certainly if she was fined for the offence it would have been paid via benefit money she claimed so technically paid by the people who pay contributions when they go to work,no excuse for not having a job of somekind even volunteering would give her some self esteem I think,but I expect she will still be sitting smoking in her tip of a house until she draws her pension.

Nancy66 Tue 21-Jan-14 17:59:00

me too. You just know they will though....

Lottapianos Tue 21-Jan-14 17:54:20

Nancy, the whole way through the program I was looking at Becky and Mark and thinking PLEASE for the love of sanity do NOT have another baby!

PrivateBenjamin Tue 21-Jan-14 16:24:11

Dee's daughter seems like a smart girl, I hope she has hopes and dreams for the future away from that street. Dee's behaviour to her son was disgusting. The screaming and sending a fiveyear old out at night in the dark to look for his bike is just disgraceful.

I felt really sorry for Becky and Mark. They really want to be good parents but they just don't know how. Mark was so proud of his first CV, even showing it to his son, it brought a tear to my eye. I noticed Dee took the piss out of a spelling mistake on it when Mark showed it to her, she is just a horrible negative person.

Nancy66 Tue 21-Jan-14 15:22:27

White Dee's daughter seems like a nice, bright kid. Hope she gets the hell away from her mother as soon as she's able. Bet Dee will be one of those mothers that expects her daughter to become her carer though and never have a life of her own.

At least Mark and Becky were going to parenting classes. Thing is they're both very young so they'll have another 2 or 3 kids in five years' time and they'll never quite get on top of their situation.

Lottapianos Tue 21-Jan-14 15:13:36

Very sad episode. I have worked (NHS) with loads of parents like Mark and Becky - quite sweet and well meaning but not a single clue about how to be around a child never mind be a parent. Children's Centre parenting advice is excellent and it was lovely to see the change in Becky's understanding of the situation developing when she got some support. I felt sorry for Mark, that job looked soul destroying.

White Dee was vile to her little boy over the bike incident

Tiredemma Tue 21-Jan-14 14:55:13

I wouldnt want my kids within a mile of Funghi and his mates. They do have gardens behind those houses also.

Blondeshavemorefun Tue 21-Jan-14 13:52:36

Totally agree kids shouldn't be playing in the street alone

I said the same earlier about dees son playing in the park alive and in the dark

If the street shown from birds eye at beginning is theirs then they have back gardens

PistolAnnies Tue 21-Jan-14 13:48:19

I'm with Nancy66, I wouldn't dare let my little ones play out in the street, and they're 6 and 3!

Retropear Tue 21-Jan-14 11:09:39

Rubbish if the parent is monitoring it properly.My 3 played out in their cars,toy buggies etc frequently at that age under my supervision in their nice m/c street.Many kids have to because that is the only outside space they have.

Nancy66 Tue 21-Jan-14 11:00:35

Well, for starters any 2 and 3 year is too young to play on the street whether they live on Benefits Street or Millionaire's Row.

Retropear Tue 21-Jan-14 10:53:32

Erm how do you do it when you live in a street filled with them and have limited outside space?

Think those if us living in our m/c bubbles aren't best placed to judge unless we live in a street filled with junkies and very little outside space ourselves.

I find it hard enough sheltering my dc from bully boy next door and his rabid pet dogs.I am lucky we have a good sized garden,a car and enough cash to take them out for the day.

Nancy66 Tue 21-Jan-14 10:45:48

Retro - I don't think expecting parents to keep their toddlers away from junkies is unreasonable actually!

Tiredemma Tue 21-Jan-14 10:43:06

I think because Mark and his partner look so 'old' you forget that they were 17 when they had their first child- so kids themselves really.

Tiredemma Tue 21-Jan-14 10:41:43

Every single family on that street seems to be prioritising their cigarettes and booze over their children

this is very similar to my own childhood (and childhood of my cousins on my mothers side). My mom is from a large family and a huge chunk spent most of adult life out of work and on benefits or working but cash in hand. (They actually all grew up around Winson Green in bham and my parents were married in the church that featured last week)

Everything seemed to revolve around alcohol- we wasnt 'abused' but I suppose nowadays SS would perhaps view some aspects of our living as 'neglect'.

Amazingly- bar a couple who got into drugs at an early age (including sadly my own brother)- my 'generation' of cousins have gone on to be successful for want of a better word. Most of us attended University (but as mature students- funding ourselves) to gain access to employment as Nurses, teachers, social workers. The males have tended to start their own businesses (landscape gardening, plastering, building etc)

As a group we are far more successful than our parents. I do think we must have all collectively agreed (telepathically!) that it wasnt the life for us and it certainly wouldnt be the life for my children.

My 13 year old son watched this with us last night and was aghast- he couldnt believe what he was seeing. I told him about my childhood - he asked why I am not like 'big dee' then hmm- I dont know what the answer is really?

Retropear Tue 21-Jan-14 10:38:24

I did think the Surestart worker did an excellent job though.

Retropear Tue 21-Jan-14 10:37:33

I wasn't impressed with the Surestart worker's costs bum face re the kids playing outside.It's hardly the fault of the parents if they live in an area filled with drug addicts,what are they supposed to do,lock their kids up 24/7?

I also think sitting outside on the sofa all day,I'd be doing the same in order to keep an eye on them.

The couple clearly have zero experience re parenting and maybe have a few learning issues,that isn't in their fault.I found/find parenting hard and I've had a secure upbringing and education.

Where is the support?

That said,no re the continual smoking.Their 3k in debt is probably 3k worth of nicotine at £8 a pack.

Oh and Dee needs to get off her backside.

wintertimeisfun Tue 21-Jan-14 10:34:31

tire i agree, i thought mark was really good the way he did that job, he was polite, enthusiastic, articulate. i think he would shine in the right job. if i lived nearby and was watching, if i had a suitable job i would want to give him a chance. c'mon people..

i can't help feel sorry for white dee. she oozes depression. i can't see anyting about her life that is going to help it either. i feel sorry for her kids. her daughter looks so empty if you look at her face, i really feel sorry for the kids, that little boy was really howling when she was screaming at him about losing his bike. what bloody chance do they have? i think the daughter has more hope than her brother tbh

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