<Sob> Temporarily overwhelmed by DS1 and 2

(184 Posts)
BoffinMum Mon 05-Aug-13 12:44:49

I am trying to work from home during August as I haven't got a lot of childcare, but DS (12) and DS (15) are driving me nuts. Despite my best efforts they are doing everything on an imaginary ticklist of annoying-but-not-illegal-or-immoral things, specifically designed to annoy a parent. Their minor but exasperating crimes include:

Smearing jam all over clean sheets from eating in bed
Peeing all over the place in the bathroom and making it stink
Toilet skid marks, no use of brush
No assistance in house whatsoever despite many disciplinary strategies
Lying in bed until lunch and then loafing about in pyjamas all day
Arguing and scrapping with each other
Bedrooms like fetid hellholes that time forgot (gave in and cleaned one today as I couldn't bear it any longer)
Banging on about the next thing they want me to buy for them
Refusing to their holiday homework from school
Refusing to do anything except muck about on their computers

I have tried everything I can think of to reign them in but I am wondering if there are things other people can think of. I am getting no work done and they have me in tears at the moment.

HelenMumsnet (MNHQ) Mon 05-Aug-13 12:47:29

<unMNy hug>

Same here, if any consolation at all smile

BoffinMum Mon 05-Aug-13 13:13:59

Bit of a development.
Eldest DS has come into study, apologised unreservedly for being a teenager, has told his brother off, offered to take him down the park, offered assistance in the house and promised to do better.
Shall I send him round to yours? <weak smile>

orangeandemons Mon 05-Aug-13 13:20:18

Leave the bed sheets, leave their rooms, leave the homework, leave them in bed, leave them on the computers. This is what all our 3 ds's did when teens. It's all normal IMO.

However toilet issues are not normal, and they can clear them up

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 13:24:04

I wanted to divorce my eldest on holiday last week, I have threatened its the last time he comes with us and there were moments when I bordered upon hating him last week.

Teenagers are so damn selfish.

Shut the doors to their bedrooms but i'm afraid you will have to stick to your guns on the communal parts of the house so that fight is worth having.

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 13:29:22

Oh my word. I cannot express how grateful I am that it's not just me. I am not working either.

We are supposed to be going away the last week of the month but TBF I don't know if I want to go away with them. shock

DumSpiroSpero Mon 05-Aug-13 13:34:44

Change the WiFi password whenever it gets too much and refuse to supply it until they've cleaned the bathroom/tidied rooms/done homework etc.

Disclaimer - this idea comes from Facebook, my DD hasn't quite hit this stage yet.

Gruntfuttocks Mon 05-Aug-13 13:38:27

So glad to read your update, OP. Treasure that moment and remember it next time he's being an arse. "It's just a phase" - a useful mantra for you when it all gets too much. He's still a decent person and will come good in the end!

Travelledtheworld Mon 05-Aug-13 13:41:41

Mine, 13 and 15 are both sleeping in fetid hell holes of wet towels, filthy sheets, dirty crockery and sweaty clothes right now.
While they are asleep I will remove wireless router and tell them it is family clean up day and no computers until house is clean again...they will whine but they will do it.

Actually I am in the USA so it is 8.30 am here but they will sleep until noon if left undisturbed.

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 13:45:48

I had to wake mine at 11 as I became concerned that maybe they had been kidnapped or slipped into comas and that perhaps as a responsible parent I should check they were still alive.

Actually regretting it since as the feeding began almost immediately (scrambled egg on toast and "mum can I have the last bakewell?") swifly followed by "can we go somewhere nice for the day?" "will you come and play tennis with us?"

Sigh!

BoffinMum Mon 05-Aug-13 14:41:42

Further update.

Younger DS has made a very contrite apology and is being very subdued and helpful.

Elder son removed the router himself!

Mind you, when directed to the ironing basket both of them vanished ....!

BlueSky, what is it with the feeding? Mine learn cookery at school but still come to me with open mouths like little chicks wanting endless sustenance. Only between meals, mind. At meals they gobble down half a plateful and leave the rest in order to battle about whether they are allowed to leave the table or not.

Nospringchickendipper Mon 05-Aug-13 14:55:00

Ds is fast asleep on the sofa he only got up a few hours ago and in that short time I've taken his ps3 off him,had a shouting match with him about how he treats me and made him go and clean his bedroom.

On the plus side he has said he's sorry given me a hug and showed me some funny clip he was watching on you tube.

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 15:11:50

envy at all these apologetic teens. DS1 is now playing PS3 online with a mate and shouting so loud down the mic that his mate 2 miles away can probably hear anyway.

I have told DS2 I want his room decluttered, but nothings happening. hmm

I am making mine exercise. Sent one out for a 5k run this morning. Think I will send the other on a long bike ride soon.

I have also set up a schedule of fines if they don't do the basics - clothes in wash basket, plates in sink etc. They have the holidays to get in the swing of things, otherwise they will be very poor come September !

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 15:29:07

I am surprised we haven't had our butts kicked yet by someone saying we are enabling their awful attitude and behaviour. grin

JuliaScurr Mon 05-Aug-13 15:35:11

www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/mind/articles/emotions/teenagers/sleep.shtml

teenagers don't do early nights or mornings
toddlers need naps

it is equally cruel to deprive either group of their natural sleep pattern

Travelledtheworld Mon 05-Aug-13 15:52:43

DS 13 grew an inch this week while on holiday and having 12 hour sleeps!

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 15:56:39

grin travelled Ds1 is a bit lanky looking lately.

He is in a bad mood because he saw the lad from Outnumbered on TV last night and he had a really deep voice. He is 5 months younger than DS1 whose voice is showing no signs of breaking at all. Oh the angst.

Nospringchickendipper Mon 05-Aug-13 17:11:31

If they grow when they sleep Ds will be about 8ft come Sept.smile

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:27:26

Laughing at them being like little chicks, I have had to talk to both at dinner time tonight they were shovelling mounds of food in their mouths so fast it was like being on a building site watching the digger at work!

I made the mistake of entering a bedroom and realised that DS had no sheets on his bed, as the room didn't look too hideous I decided to attempt it. He returned as it was beginning to look halfway decent (climbing over the mound of discarded clothing and bedding I had thrown into the hall) x box goes straight back on, headphones and microphone back on and trousers taken off and thrown onto the newly cleared floor cue immature mother tantrum and again i'm leaving him to it. Why do they always have to be in their boxers?

I laugh so much when I watch The Middle, he is just like Axl sometimes even he can see it and looks at me guiltily as I howl with laughter.

ratbag

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 19:29:14

Well here, DS1 takes his trousers off then leaves pants inside them. then floats round in his dressing gown usually not tied.

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:43:41

Yeah we have the untied dressing gown thing here too (its about 3 sizes too small) nice generally worn whilst foraging in the kitchen grin I can remember when it was last washed - id be afraid to touch it now i'd probably need a tetanus or at least hosing down with antiseptic.

I think his boxers must have to be pared off with a blunt knife - they only get changed if I query duration of wearing hmm

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:44:33

can't remember when it was last washed

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 19:45:49

DS1 is 14. I believe the dressing gown is an 11-12. sad

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:47:52

well he only wears it during food gathering before returning to his den....its not worth buying a new one

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 19:49:21

What is the food of choice Blue? We never seem to have the correct food for him. He's eaten a box of Tunnock's Teacakes today.

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:49:30

Your son is obviously going for a similar look sparkling - commiserations (although glad to say I don't yet have to deal with the pants in the trousers thing!)

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 19:51:56

Crisps, biscuits, cakes, pork pies.

Nothing that has grown or could be good for him.

He is currently going through an energy drinks phase, despite me pointing out that they shouldn't be drunk by under 16s and they will knacker his bones. Today he did say he had stomach ache was going to "try to cut down" hmm

Hassled Mon 05-Aug-13 19:54:07

I do that "should I check they haven't been kidnapped or died?" thing when it gets close to 12 and there's no sign of movement. DS3, who's 11 and has been up with the lark since birth, today woke at 8.45 and I had almost fully convinced myself he'd inhaled too much airfix glue overnight.

Then they sit around watching the Big Bang Theory or killing XBox baddies for hours, while I do stuff, and eventually ask "what are we doing today?" and I give them a long ranty list of the stuff I have already done today.

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 19:55:17

Sounds similar Blue. Absolutely nothing that has been grown as you say, cooking far too much trouble. Has to be in a box/bag and easily transported up the stairs.

I am in trouble as there is no Pepsi-only Lemonade. So he has drunk all the Tropicana. hmm

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 20:01:11

I did him scrambled egg, he did the toast this morning - he then coated it in an inch of ketchup and said "do I have to eat this downstairs" hmm "YES YOU BLOODY DO"

The first time he made scrambled egg it exploded in the microwave and H told him he was not to do it again - DS now reminds me of that every time. I did say "for gods sake how does he think you are ever going to learn to do it yourself then?"

Sparklingbrook Mon 05-Aug-13 20:03:59

grin Blue. I did do him a bacon sandwich yesterday as i was worried that frying pan/undone dressing gown could lead to injury.

wigglybeezer Mon 05-Aug-13 20:14:20

I bought DS 1 a new dressing gown to replace the 11-12 one, he chewed holes in it while watching telly until it looked like something worn by the undead, I chucked it out. He now attempts to walk about the house with his duvet wrapped round him, knocking things off tables and shelves ( we are not allowed to see him in his boxers, lest we notice the changes in scale!).

BoffinMum Mon 05-Aug-13 20:19:00

gringrin At all of these. Feel a distinct sense of solidarity, I do.

It could be worse. DS1 said with a straight face that some of his friends are so into self-abuse at the moment that he reckons their willies must look like Pepperami. gringrin

MrsFrederickWentworth Mon 05-Aug-13 20:26:46

I now fine mine for leaving dirty underwrite on his floor. But forgot to add " it has to go to the dirty clothes basket. " I open a drawer and....

Rule has changed..

Have not managed to toilet train adequately either.

And foetid towel syndrome is recurrent. Likewise cereal bowl on sofa.

Hassled Mon 05-Aug-13 20:29:53

grin at pepperami.

I honestly think that left to his own devices DS2 could spend 6 weeks either in his lair or lying on the sofa, making the occasionally appearance in the kitchen to harangue me about something the Tories have done, like I'm personally responsible.

BlueSkySunnyDay Mon 05-Aug-13 20:34:54

MrsFredrick - dirty underwrite lol are you on a mobile by any chance grin

I removed a bag of empty cans and drink cartons, the aforementioned mountain of bedding and discarded clothing plus loads of dirty cups and plates hmm

BeadyBagsaTella Mon 05-Aug-13 21:25:02

Sparklingbrook, that's one of the rules in my kitchen - no frying whilst wearing a dressing gown - no standards slipping here this summer!

orangeandemons Mon 05-Aug-13 21:25:20

Ds used to collect vim to cans. He was very proud of his entire wall of vimto cans

I was distinctly unimpressed. It took 9 bin liners, and as his room was an atic room several flights of stairs to get them out, and they all bloody leaked down the stairs.

He never forgave me, but I feel my suffering was much worse.

redcaryellowcar Mon 05-Aug-13 21:36:03

I have a two year old ds and read this smiling as have all this to come, will prepare myself for bedroom mucking out and inadequately dressed teenager, ds is tall so perhaps I will just buy him adult dressing gown to begin with hopefully eliminating the potential damage he might do himself whilst frying up a bacon sandwich!

BoffinMum Mon 05-Aug-13 21:39:06

Red car, if you want grandchildren it's the only way to go wink

BoffinMum Tue 06-Aug-13 08:31:25

I think I have a new strategy.
If they don't do as I say, threaten to buy them really naff white and cheap y fronts instead of boxers.
That should hit them where it hurts.

Nospringchickendipper Tue 06-Aug-13 09:07:27

Ds always has his hands down his underwear I won't let him touch anything in the kitchen till he's wash his hands

Dread to think what he does when I'm not there.

Good for my diet as he eats a lot of cakes and biscuits.

Theas18 Tue 06-Aug-13 09:16:15

We have shovelled out DS pit while he's been away and painted it ... faint!

We have also been to IKEA and bought actual wardrobe as DH labours under the false understanding that the clothes on floor/dirty clothes on floor ( all in a large heap and stinking) including DH best socks (snork!) are because the chest of drawers/hanging stuff from the high bed plan doesn't provide enough storage space.

I give it a week before everything is on the floor again.... and dirty.... and includes DH socks...

He's a great lad but the pit he lives in!

Itscoldouthere Tue 06-Aug-13 09:32:54

Good to read all your posts.

DS1 (15) away at the moment, but DS2 (13) seems to spend his time drifting around attached to some type of electrical device in manky pjs,
hes so tall and skinny, he's like a piece of string wafting about.

I have to force him outside and struggle to get him to do anything I think is worthwhile like sport!

Can't wait to go on holiday so I know he will actually put clothes on and see daylight.

Love the "no frying in dressing gown rule"

Sparklingbrook Tue 06-Aug-13 09:40:15

YY at 'piece of string' Itscold. grin One MNetter referred to her teen's floor as a 'floordrobe'. I have adopted that word.

littlemisswise Tue 06-Aug-13 10:03:13

The best thing that has happened in our house is DS1 got more hours at work and DS2 got a job so they are never in!grin

When they are here though, they are in boxers or dressing gowns! I remember my brother being the same 25 years ago.

They constantly eat. I woke up at 1am the other day wondering what I could smell, they were cooking fish fingers to make fish finger sandwiches!hmm.

I can't stand messy rooms so I clean them and put their clothes away. I shouldn't do it, I know, but it winds me up and I can't leave it.

Sparklingbrook Tue 06-Aug-13 10:04:19

DS1 has a paper round every Wednesday. Tomorrow he will be sat in the flapping dressing gown inserting leaflets into the paper. hmm

ZingWidge Tue 06-Aug-13 10:15:48

I won't even start on what my 5 sons (and a baby girl) are doing to the house, each other and my nerves.

eldest has just turned 12 but already acts as a teenager.....I have no idea what it will be like in 5 years when the oldest 4 are 17, 15, 13, 11.
I might need a testosterone anti-dose just to enter the house....grin

survivingthechildren Tue 06-Aug-13 10:45:42

Ah ha Boffin! I see your 2 DS and raise you my 4!!

Seriously, hold the wifi password hostage. Results guaranteed, or your money back!

MadAboutHotChoc Tue 06-Aug-13 10:56:07

grin

All so familiar!

I let it all go though as term time is a whirlwind of school, homework, tests/exams, evening training sessions and weekend matches. So nice to be laid back and not have any time pressures on us.

Hopasholic Tue 06-Aug-13 10:57:00

I am going to make you all envy

My DS's 13 & 11 have gone away with Mil until ......... Saturday grin

DH is working away

I am currently floating round house with my dressing gown flapping.

I'm not even going to tidy their stinking bedrooms either.

grin

Palika Tue 06-Aug-13 13:22:34

I am sure I will be appearing as a real swat but I will tell you nevertheless how we solved that problem.

DS14 used to be a total nuisance every time holidays started until we worked out that it was fear of boredom - or rather fear of all that empty space. I suggested to DS to make a plan for each day with some fixtures like work on the land (we live in the country) and homework and his 2 hours on the computer he is allowed per day.

DS has totally embraced the idea and is happily living by his self-written rather tight schedule. Amazing!!!

FortyFacedFuckers Tue 06-Aug-13 14:24:08

I have a 7 year old DS and this thread has made me want to shoot myself. grin How many blissful years do I have left before I encounter this joy that is teenage DS's?

BlueSkySunnyDay Tue 06-Aug-13 17:29:41

I hate to say it forty but my ds has been heading this way since 10 he veers between being a shouty and annoyed stranger and my lovely charming son. Neither of them have very good personal hygiene or any sense of style - he is another one who has hands down boxers all the time I wouldn't dream of eating anything he has touched.

Sparklingbrook Tue 06-Aug-13 19:15:33

We tried to go out as a family today. Then DS2 looked at DS1 the wrong way or something so then DS1 refused to come out with us. hmm

BlueSkySunnyDay Tue 06-Aug-13 20:21:05

I guess it helps to know its all "normal" for this age and I haven't given birth to some kind of devil spawn.

FortyFacedFuckers Tue 06-Aug-13 22:07:39

Blue 10 eek confused

Travelledtheworld Thu 08-Aug-13 14:20:11

forty possibly 11' but my DS changed practically overnight from sweet affectionate child who would happily build dens with sticks in the garden to sullen, grunting adolescentto whom everything is lame and boring.

Enjoy your child while you still can !

Graceparkhill Thu 08-Aug-13 14:29:52

Scottish schools go back next week so the end is in sight. Until we went on hol last week DS2 ( 14) had barely stirred from his room. He could stand in for Julian Assange no problem.

I am pleased to report that during our hol he
Wore clothes
Got up before 0930
Ate proper food and not just Pringles
Conversed
Smiled
Took part in everything
Back to normal now though. On Skype with pal, unshowered and munching on the Pringles!

ZingWidge Thu 08-Aug-13 18:37:02

grace when did they break up then? ours barely finished 2 weeks ago and not back till 4th Sept!

Graceparkhill Thu 08-Aug-13 22:35:11

June 25 th was last day of term. Seems like a lifetime ago.

BlueSkySunnyDay Sun 11-Aug-13 21:07:06

My son has now given up showering completely and just covers himself in Lynx Africa - really would not be safe to light a match in his room.

We got back from holiday a week ago and i'm pretty sure he hasn't cleaned his teeth since.

num3onway Sun 11-Aug-13 21:09:43

Dear god I am dreading my 4 and 5 year olds becoming grunting smelly teenage boys

BlueSkySunnyDay Sun 11-Aug-13 21:13:14

yeah, enjoy while you can!

Sparklingbrook Sun 11-Aug-13 21:24:58

Well tomorrow is the start of another 'fun' week. They go back to school 3 weeks this Thursday. <sigh>

alistron1 Mon 12-Aug-13 23:32:15

14 year old DS now only leaves his room to eat. However he seems to need feeding as often as a newborn - so he's never really in his room. Despite this his room is fetid.

16 year old DD is going through a phase of silent weeping about all the reasons why I am ruining her life. When she isnt weeping silently she's out with her friends having a jolly nice time.

I can't wait for school to start. All I seem to do is buy food, make food, clear up food, listen to rants about how rubbish I/their dad/this house is, be forced to read tweets about lady gaga's current activities and buy more food.

The SAS should recruit teenagers to break people.

Sparklingbrook Tue 13-Aug-13 07:51:57

DS1 last had a shower last Wednesday. sad I have told him today's the day. He too is in his room when he's not foraging for food in the kitchen where apparently 'there's nothing to eat'. hmm

alistron DH and i are continually being told where we are going wrong. Why the house isn't suitable etc etc etc

Sparklingbrook Tue 13-Aug-13 07:52:35

Oh and our house is in 'the wrong place' hmm

Chubfuddler Tue 13-Aug-13 07:55:33

My six and two year old are behaving like this op. particularly vis a vis barely eating at mealtimes as desperate to return to paddling pool/slide/toys/iPad but then demanding "snacks" ten minutes later. I've taken to just reserving the previously rejected meal and then giving them that. Apparently if eaten on bedroom floor/in front of tv it's a snack and immediately delicious.

Sparklingbrook Tue 13-Aug-13 08:14:07

I honestly don't know how DS1 survives at school. Lunchtime is 1.20pm. shock

Ledkr Tue 13-Aug-13 08:23:09

I suffered raised 3 teen boys at once and worked f time.
I'm afraid I shut their doors rather than look, insisted on communal mess being cleared or no money,lifts etc.
If their rooms got too bad I'd removed all pleasures untill they were cleared up.
I frequently arrived at work with a mouse, the house phone and the sky card (pre broadband days)
Ds2 us in his twenties and stayed here while we were in holiday for two weeks.
It was still a bloody bit if a mess when we came back!!!

outtolunchagain Tue 13-Aug-13 08:25:52

I've had enough now as well, my younger two are definitely ready to go back now ,16 and 11 ( starting senior school) and have been home since 5 July ,ds1 has been home from university since early June and the house is just not big enough for everyone's stuff , I seem to go to the supermarket virtually every day and the washing is endless.

The thing is they have descended into a stupor now , it's a battle to get anyone to do anything , although ds3 came for a walk with the dog yesterday and I try to organise something for him each day even if its just a dog walk .

alistron1 Tue 13-Aug-13 10:24:02

Right, I'm forcing them all out today. We are going to a hill, they'll love that. I am taking the router with us <<evil>>

Sparklingbrook Tue 13-Aug-13 10:32:04

Good luck with that alistron. DS1 still snoring away. He is having a shower today. Definitely.

dds very active friend with strict parents just called round for dd. I was relieved beyond words to find that dd was actually dressed as she came down the stairs!

BoffinMum Tue 13-Aug-13 21:07:00

Oh dear. Complete family row about the mess. But it was out of control. DS1 somewhat traumatised. DS2 in a sulk in bed, DS3 at least is OK and asleep.

Sparklingbrook Tue 13-Aug-13 21:11:27

DS1 was complaining there was nothing to eat again so I said he could come to Lidl and get some stuff suitable for a lazy 14 year old.

But no, he couldn't even be arsed to do that. angry He has consumed an entire tube of Pringles today, along with sundry other crap.

He's had a shower though.

He's got his paper round tomorrow. Wouldn't surprise me if he did it in his boxer shorts and untied dressing gown.

Travelledtheworld Wed 14-Aug-13 04:00:00

DS 13 did not get out of his pyjamas unitil 5 pm this afternoon, but we are on holiday in a lakeside cottage and it poured with rain all day so i just didnt care.....

Ireallymustbemad Wed 14-Aug-13 15:02:04

I love this thread. It has made me smile with recognition at almost every post! Particularly the eating crap, leaving the place in a tip, bedrooms a pigsty and hands down the pants! Yy to one looking at the other the 'wrong way amusing all hell to break loose too!

DS1 is nearly 13 (going into y8) and DS2 is 9.5yrs so I have several years to go!

I did insist at the beginning of the holidays though that they had to eat proper meals, ie cereal or toast for breakfast, sandwich for lunch etc rather than just snack all day. That seems to be working...

OP - I am also trying to work from home for a couple of hours a day and struggling to get much done.

I feel I need to start gradually getting them into some sort of routine in a week or so, so that when they go back in September life may be more peaceful!

I love the idea of changing the wifi password, will keep that as an ultimate reserve! once I figure out how on earth to do it

UnitedZingDom Wed 14-Aug-13 15:34:07

ireally

my 16 months old DD also does hand in pants (nappies). she has a fab "so what" look to go with it.

I have no chance...

Viking1 Wed 14-Aug-13 16:29:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nospringchickendipper Wed 14-Aug-13 16:29:36

Managed to get Ds to sort his bedroom out yesterday.
Did take a lot of threats of sanction if he didn't .
There was a lot of moaning and groaning (and that was just me) after several hours numerous black bags of stuff it's done.

I am leaving him to laze about today,after all his hard work yesterdaysmile

Viking1 Wed 14-Aug-13 16:30:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook Wed 14-Aug-13 17:40:04

Did the paper round. I helped in order to improve mother/son relationships. I had to do all the houses with dogs and long drives weirdly. hmm

We are hiring a narrow boat for the day tomorrow. Could be interesting, we have to leave the house at 8.30am. shock

monikar Wed 14-Aug-13 19:20:12

I have really laughed at this thread. I don't have boys but all I can add is that in a year or two, when they have girls they want to impress their overall hygiene will improve. Boys who visit at our house have probably spent longer doing their hair than DD, it's all combed and gelled. They have clean clothes and now they are older (17/18) have grown out of the lynx phase and are mostly into slightly more sophisticated fragrances.

Sparkling no boy has ever turned up in a dressing gown, flapping or otherwise grin .

Sparklingbrook Wed 14-Aug-13 19:30:58

OMG there is hope monikar and I only have to wait 3 years. Yay! grin

monikar Wed 14-Aug-13 19:37:47

Those 3 years will fly by and then you may be able to throw out the dressing gown as it will no longer be needed.

You might feel a bit sad when the dressing gown eventually goes as it has been a big part of your lives grin .

Sparklingbrook Wed 14-Aug-13 20:24:15

Do I send the dressing gown off with the provisional driving licence application?

monikar Wed 14-Aug-13 21:07:51

Yes, that will be fine as proof of his age - the DVLA will recognise the faithful dressing gown of a 17yo boy. Better it is out of the house - he might want to take his driving lessons in it. Failing that, your next chance will be when he leaves home for uni, but that is going to be harder on both of you.

MrsFrederickWentworth Wed 14-Aug-13 21:28:20

Ds left his muller yoghourt pots on the sitting room floor. Ditto the chocolate ice cream pot ( empty).

Cue for Ddog to go on complete sugar high at 10 pm. Excitable jrt beside himself.

Ds has just sat through a prom with us opening his water bottle and his chewing gum. We flanked him to avoid the enraged stares of other music lovers. If you were listing to this evening's prom and heard an apparent rifle shot in the Beethoven piano concerto that was Ds's water bottle.

Mind you, I have had to come out coughing.

The floor is covered with disgusting clothes and food wrappers.

I am emigrating.

dementedma Wed 14-Aug-13 21:36:33

Laughing at this. Ds is 11 and we are on the cusp. However, having raised two dds to adulthood I see you your teen ds's and raise you:
Bra sagas
Periods
Lady gardens and associated topiary options
Straighteners
Mascara - lots of
Tears - lots of
Hours in front of the mirror before hysteria about how fat and ugly they are
Lectures about wearing fuck me shoes, micro skirts and " you are not going out like that young lady"
Fringe across eyes to hide eye roll
Unsuitable teen boyfriends in flappy dressing gowns
I want chocolate/I'm so spotty/I'm so fat/ I need chocolate/ OMG I'm such a pig/get me chocolate/ I'm only eating salad forever...
Oh, and the bedrooms are equally fetid with overflowing bins (chocolate wrappers), used tissues, eye make up remover pads, dirty knickers - teeny weeny gossamer wisps of lace magazines,fake nails, laptops permanently on Facebook exchanging bitching sessions, foundation tide marks on pillows, false eyelashes like huge spiders .......need I say more?

Sparklingbrook Wed 14-Aug-13 21:52:00

demented take a good look at your DS's dressing gown. That's the one he will be wearing in 3 year's time to slob around the house in. wink

The girl version sounds a bit more terrifying. shock

BoffinMum Wed 14-Aug-13 21:55:28

Monikar, I live in hope.

dementedma Wed 14-Aug-13 21:57:33

Noooooo, it has little aliens on. He's just a baby.....
Never forget the day dh made some dumplings to go in a stew, and dd1, then about 17 prodded one and said " ewww, they feel like testicles". Cue blush to roots of hair, stunned silence round table and dh saying icily " would you care to elaborate young lady?". Did make me wonder about the bf though......

alistron1 Fri 16-Aug-13 08:54:36

i've managed to get the teenagers out twice this week. One of those outings involved a garden centre!

Sparkling - my DD's have paper rounds. Oldest DD has been known to do her round in her jama's!

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 08:58:04

DS2's dressing gown has Super Mario on demented. shock

alistron don't say that. grin The paper round includes our road so clothes are compulsory. How did you get a teen into a garden centre? shock

alistron1 Fri 16-Aug-13 09:01:18

I made it sound like i wanted to go alone and have some quality me time. They then decided that they just had to come with me!! Mwahahaha!

outtolunchagain Fri 16-Aug-13 09:02:04

Oh dear school shoes need to be done today , can't leave it any longer , I'm already feeling like wimping outhmm

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 09:03:15

I thought it may have involved the cafe and slices of cake alistron. grin

Oh no out. Good luck with that. sad

outtolunchagain Fri 16-Aug-13 12:26:41

Right we are finally leaving the house!

ZingWantsCake Fri 16-Aug-13 12:37:27

sorry to distract you all, but I have bad news.

the [ cake] is gone!
I started a new thread in AIBU to get the cake emoticon back.

I want cake!

I had to NC and I'm begging you to help!

ZingWantsCake Fri 16-Aug-13 14:54:43

sorry again, storm in a brew cup
cake is back

cakegate[au] is over.
as you were....

sorry

alistron1 Fri 16-Aug-13 18:42:43

Despite spending £140 in Tesco on wednesday (suspect budget queen posters don't have teen kids) apparently there is nothing to eat in the house. Even though I made breakfast for the poor starving children - which some of them couldn't be bothered to come down and eat.

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 19:11:24

I do Click and Collect alistron. i bark 'DOES ANYONE WANT ANYTHING BEFORE I COMPLETE THE ORDER?'. They say no. Then there's nothing to eat.

DS1 had a piece of bread for lunch as he CBA to make a sandwich. hmm

BoffinMum Fri 16-Aug-13 19:50:36

Lego. Floor.

I am a broken woman.

monikar Fri 16-Aug-13 19:58:21

Ladies, do any of you have to feed other people's DC as well as your own? That is when I particularly notice my food supplies dwindling. I sometimes think it might be simpler (and less messy) to put a nose bag on each of them grin .

dementedma Fri 16-Aug-13 19:58:59

Wet towels. Floor. Always

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 20:00:46

Oh yes OPC monikar. Always feeding them. DS1 will have friends round and go and get himself something to eat. i have to remind him to ask them if they want anything. hmm

monikar Fri 16-Aug-13 20:08:12

Sparkling but they eat so much, especially the boys! I must be very relaxed as they all help themselves. Also, they can eat a full meal with pudding and about a litre of coke each, and then about half an hour later are 'still hungry' and so are stuffing on crisps and biscuits. Then they spend the rest of the evening literally sitting around their plates, cups, empty bottles and crisp bags! No-one gets up and puts anything in the bin.

I have got wise to this and buy supplies when it is on offer and stow it away in secret places for such emergencies.

CatsAndTheirPizza Fri 16-Aug-13 20:37:48

These threads scare me to death - I don't know why I read them. I have one teenage-free year left and then eleven teenage years ahead of that <bloody terrified>

dementedma Fri 16-Aug-13 20:46:47

Boys or girls cats?

CatsAndTheirPizza Fri 16-Aug-13 20:49:08

I'm almost scared to say demented in case you say they are worse, but ... all boys - three.

dementedma Fri 16-Aug-13 20:52:36

Lol. I have done two girls and survived. I am embarking on dc3 who is a boy and watching with interest to see the difference.

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 21:14:21

Just been upstairs. DS1's room empty with TV on, but sounds coming from the bathroom. I shouted was he ok? He said he was having a poo and watching something on his IPad. Nice.
At least he wasn't eating as well I suppose.

CatsAndTheirPizza Fri 16-Aug-13 21:31:55

Good luck with that demented. Oh and thanks for putting me off dumplings for life!

kilmuir Fri 16-Aug-13 21:38:29

I have a 15 year old DD and she is a mucky mare, unless its her hair!

dementedma Fri 16-Aug-13 21:38:38

Sorry cats. Teenage girls are funny creatures. Dd1 lives in her bedroom and mutters "fine" to any question put to her ( I say 'teen" she is 22 ffs), dd2 I haven't seen for days but will no doubt rock up in borrowed clothes, grab a bag and shout " going to mollies/kirstens/Amy's/nicks - see ya.'
Bloody chalk and cheese

FourLittleDudes Fri 16-Aug-13 21:41:39

I have 4 boys <sob>

Sparklingbrook Fri 16-Aug-13 21:44:05

You will need to change your NN to *FourLazyTeenageDudes' eventually Four. grin

outtolunchagain Fri 16-Aug-13 22:17:00

Well the shoes weren't too bad although I am nearly£100 poorer and they have spent all evening playing on the Xbox together , lovely to hear them getting on .

Am loving this thread , so much familiar stuff and great to laugh about it all . The food thing is really getting to me at the moment I just can't keep up

watchingout Sat 17-Aug-13 07:58:39

I'm sniggering at this thread as I recognise ALL of it, but am currently enjoying a break while DD(17) DS1(16) and DS2(12) are away with XH grin

So far I have managed to ignore three pigsties in the house, but they are beginning to niggle at the edge of my consciousness. DS1 often returns saying " I love coming home, cos mum has always tidied my room" confused so I'm arguing with myself. Can I put up with the squalor for unspecified years and just write off those parts of my house? Or should I deep-clean and show what CAN be achieved and reward any maintenance?

DD1 has two MASSIVE coffee stains on the carpet which bug the hell out of me every time I see them. Any advice?

dementedma Sat 17-Aug-13 09:03:22

A rug for dds carpet. Job done.
I did the room tidying for a while then after a shouting match with dd1 who said " well, if it bugs you, don't go in" I realised she had a point. Such a relief to give up on this one. All I do now is open the door, chuck a pile of unironed clothes on the bed and leave. When I stopped doing their ironing I fondly believed they would be forced into doing their own, but they just wear it unironed, so another issue resolved!
I also do the chucking on the bed thing with stuff they leave in the sitting room - nail varnish, magazines, etc. Dd1 dumps it on the floor, dd2 just sleeps round it on a bed without a sheet because I refuse to do beds for people that age and she can't be arsed!

alistron1 Sat 17-Aug-13 09:56:00

It's amazing how my lot moan about how rubbish our house is (it isn't) but don't seem to understand that trails of wet towels (how many towels do they need to use ffs?) clothes, shoes, bags and other ephemera detract from the ambience.

They have been compiling lists of things they need for september - an iphone 5 is an essential apparently. Oldest daughter is going into 6th form, she has to wear office wear. I work in an office so am well placed to advise on this - you'd think. She 'needs' 5 'suits' with short skirts. A different one for every day of the week. Plus accessories.Oh how I laughed.

Diamondcassis Sat 17-Aug-13 11:06:46

Phew, not just me then.

Live in hope at reports that they will "emerge like butterflies" at 18 & until then hope can just fire-fight without killing anyone.

Back from hols last Sun, washed all DD's (16) clothes so she'd have clean stuff for V Fest this weekend. Worked all week (me, not her). She was packing last night & of course had no clean clothes as had worn them all to lie around all week.

DS (14) tried to convince me that walking to shop to buy Capri Sun, which he has just rediscovered, is exercise.

watchingout Sat 17-Aug-13 11:34:11

She wore CLOTHES? Diamond? Has she not heard of dressing gowns/duvets?! wink

We aspire to DS wearing any of his three, new, respectable dressing gowns. It's skimpy boxers all the way here despite his sister having all of her gorgeous mates around all the time. He truly does not give a shit. While on the one hand I admire his lack of self consciousness, my inner Hyacinth is appalled smile

MrsFrederickWentworth Sat 17-Aug-13 12:13:44

Katie,

We have the boxer syndrome too when his little goddaughters come round, or indeed anyone else. And I find dirty jeans on the kitchen table. Why?

Diamondcassis Sat 17-Aug-13 12:18:42

Dirty jeans on kitchen table is better than several pairs of clean ( but v v crumpled) jeans in laundry basket I reckon

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 12:20:21

I am still getting pants inside trousers inside out in the laundry basket.

Oh yes, the inside out syndrome. I think that DD feels I'm not sufficiently challenged by the laundry so feels the need to help.
Last week I jeans with belt still attached and tissues in pocket, inside out with attached pants, the fact that all 3 items belong to me added a little piquancy, I must admit... smile

Diamondcassis Sat 17-Aug-13 12:50:32

Have had a lightbulb moment - if we made putting stuff in laundry as complex as putting it away, would that work? Admittedly laundry basket would have to be a wardrobe with hangers...am considering if could fit that in corner

MissMarplesBloomers Sat 17-Aug-13 13:51:07

Howling at this thread was about to ask if boys are worse than girls but looking round me I see;

DD1's bra & shoes, a book, a pile of Uni stuff, half an uneaten choccy bar (ha! she overlooked that....it may have been eaten tidied away by the time she returns from town!)

DD 2's make up bag, hairbrush, breakfast pots, & various gubbins essential to teen life.

I haven't ventured into the bedrooms recently,the floordrobe is full in each am bracing myself. grin

My saving grace is DD1 can now drive so she has taken them both off to do essential shopping crap grazing.

justcrazy Sat 17-Aug-13 14:14:21

So nice to know I'm not the only one. I have to remind DS13 to wash and change his clothes. DD17 boyfriend seems to have moved in as they have no money to go out and do things!! So I offered to pay for them to go to the cinema if they took DS with them. Peace

Boys of 17 and 15 here.
As soon as they walk through the door they peel off their clothes. Then if it's cold they wrap themselves in a manky blanket. DS1 has the ancient dressing gown which seems to live on the living room floor. Both live in boxers (if we are lucky - DS1 has no modesty).
We regularly run out of glasses because DS2 has 27 empty glasses in his pit.
They have breakfast at 12 and lunch at 2.30 which involves boiling enough pasta to feed an army.
I fear that I am a very bad mother because unlike every other MN parent I have totally failed to limit their screen time (I managed it until they hit about 14). DS2 is earning an Olympic medal on League of Legends. I finally knew things had hit rock bottom when I realised they were taking their laptops into the bathroom to balance on the loo so they could watch You tube while laying in the bath.

My DS is currently ecstatic because I finally caved and installed BT Sport. I also have provided Greggs for lunch today. I should be awarded a Shit Mother of the year badge but DS thinks I'm the nads grin

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 14:48:13

Ooh I have caved over BT sport too Katie. Bit miffed about the £15 connection fee but £12 a month better than Sky Sports robbery. I got a hug off smelly DS1 (last shower Thursday 7am). Ewww.

I got it for free but have dithered for months installing it as there is far too much football already in this house for my liking wink
DS keeps telling me how much I "rock". I'm going to regret this, aren't I? smile

I got it for free but have dithered for months installing it as there is far too much football already in this house for my liking wink
DS keeps telling me how much I "rock". I'm going to regret this, aren't I? smile

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 14:54:51

Oh yes Katie. Although lovely Jake Humphrey is presenting which makes it a bit better.

Oh, is there Totty ? ( perks up)

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 15:00:50

Yes, he's very nice. Used to do F1 coverage but he has had a baby recently so he's got a nice job not travelling the world bless him. He seems to know his stuff and is better than Gary Lineker IMO.

I think Clare Balding has a show on BT Sport at some point too.

Diamondcassis Sat 17-Aug-13 15:02:11

I like spending time with their mates though as reassures me that mine are no worse. Just spent time by sea with various of their friends. Not 1 EVER

1. Got up before 11.30
2. volunteered to help with ANYTHING
3. Put a cup/glass anywheree other than where they'd been drinking it

ALL the girls however did

1. Get eye make-up all over the towels

ALL of both sexes did

1. Live out of Floor wardrobes
2. Not appreciate that wet towels on floor stay wet

They were all great fun though.

I love Claire B. Thank you!

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 15:07:16

Diamond I like it when we have visiting teens. They are vair polite. grin

One last week took all the rubbish out of the living room and put it in the bin. shock

I was going out last night. DD and her mate decided to act as stylist, beautician and hairdresser. I have to say the effect was incredible smile
DH jaw hit the floor when we did the reveal. He was giving me a lift to the event and only semi-jokingly asked if rather than attending, I fancied a run along the country roads for a spot of tomfoolery.
He was disappointed smile

monikar Sat 17-Aug-13 15:45:58

secret I lost the screen time battle at about the same time as you - about 14yo. I think that now, at 17yo, there is no hope. I discovered on holiday recently that DD texts while in the bath! I gave a huge lecture on her electrocuting herself with the water, to which she replied 'I hold it out of the water to text and then put it on the floor while the other person replies'!

I have the wet towel problem too which others have spoken about. What used to drive me mad was when wet towels were left on her bed, but now I think 'well, it's not my bed'.

To those of you with DD, do you find the washbasins covered with a mist of blusher/powder all the time?

Yes mon, and my towels are either an impressionist masterpiece of lippy and dream matte mousse or stained to buggery with hair dye smile

monikar Sat 17-Aug-13 16:10:01

Pleased to know it's not just me then Katie - but I have a tip to share. My DD will always take a new clean towel (the wet ones are on the floor/bed) so I put the old cardboard ones on the top of the clean pile in the bathroom and the nice newer fluffier ones at the bottom for my exclusive use smile .

watchingout Sat 17-Aug-13 17:14:52

That wouldn't work in our house hmm DS1 just rifles through the neat stack until he finds his fave. Leaving destruction in his wake angry

waikikamookau Sat 17-Aug-13 17:46:36

love this thread grin
at least I have just the one teenage boy/man, I don't know, I never see ds1, 18, but his room is a mess, he leaves his dirty clothes on the bathroom floor and skid marks in the loo, I must talk to him about the loo brush, but I never see him, or he is on his way out, with an obliging friend, normally female.

the dds, 16 and 13, I have been working mainly and giving them busfares, and what not. but I was getting a leedle fed up with cooking and cleaning and cleaning so I can cook! so I had a shout.

how much longer the holidays now?

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 19:16:20

We all have our own towels all different colours. Nobody uses anyone else's. wink

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 19:25:15

Ooh a flowchart that is v apt in this house. grin

outtolunchagain Sat 17-Aug-13 19:34:42

Love that flowchartsmile

motherstongue Sat 17-Aug-13 20:28:04

Lol at the flowchart.
DS had a friend over the other day when they decided to raid the fridge and cupboards for snacks. Friend went straight into the cupboard and then complained that there was no coke left (they had finished it the day before) and then scoffed at the fact the lemonade was tesco's own make and not the usual schweppes! WTF!!!! DS followed up with a moan about the lack of ANYTHING in the fridge. They eat constantly and yes yes to the plates, cups, glasses, wrappers, towels, clothes, books, game boxes, controllers, sports bags etc all left where they are dropped.

Sparklingbrook Sat 17-Aug-13 20:39:53

And no teenage thread would be complete without a reference to this poster

BoffinMum Sat 17-Aug-13 22:48:53

I gave up on the screen time rationing when I realised that actually it wasn't doing them a lot of harm. Sometimes they even look at sites and LEARN STUFF. That shocked me.

Sometimes they even look at sites and LEARN STUFF. That shocked me
Oh yes. They both love to surprise me with some obscure detail about ancient Roman civilisation or the lifecycle of flax and say "NER I learned that on Minecraft/Age of Empires".

BoffinMum Sun 18-Aug-13 13:27:54

Yes, we have that in this house.
How can you take a stance on technology when it's USEFUL!

<folds arms>

monikar Sun 18-Aug-13 15:30:25

Oh gosh, this is so true! My DD was telling me something she had written in a GCSE exam with really obscure vocabulary - when I had finished basking in the fact that she is so articulate, I asked how she knew these words and then my bubble burst when it was from one of her many games.

Shodan Sun 18-Aug-13 15:57:06

At least I don't need to worry about my food stocks being depleted with ds1 (17)-unless it's the crisps. How he's got to 6 foot I don't know. hmm

He makes me laugh though- I frequently hear him nagging ds2 (5) to lift the seat when weeing. The number of times I told him to do the exact same thing when he was 5 and up! I tell him this now and he denies it furiously. Ditto washing his hands, not swinging on door handles... the list goes on.

MissStrawberry Sun 18-Aug-13 16:33:30

I have a boy of 12, a ten year old girl and a baby boy of 8.

DS1 has been a PITA for about a year now. Rude, cheeky, eye rolling computer obsessive. Pants left in jeans which always have one leg inside out. Wears clean pants to sleep in then another clean pair for the day. Forever leaving a sock around the house and seems unaware he is only wearing one. Not too bad with leaving pots or drinks bottles in his room and I have told him he isn't allowed to eat in his room. Not so good at putting clean clothes in the right drawers. This has meant at least once I went out and bought new underpants only to crack and tidy out his drawers and find loads. He is forever saying he doesn't have any pants or pyjamas when actually he has just shoved all his clothes in one drawer.

DD has been stroppy looks could kill for a few weeks now and it is a bit of a surprise it has started so young as she is a very mature lovely girl.

DS2 has started the one sock and putting clothes away in the wrong drawer too and I also bought pants it turned out he didn't need yet.

None probably shower enough but they aren't smelly so not too fussed. Tried to tell them at least every other day they should see water (DS2 showers most mornings actually) but they do need reminding all the time.

I worry about the amount of screen time my children have too (ds has a lap top, ipod and mp3 player)(DD has a kindle and mp4 player)(DS2 doesn't have anything but does have access to the home computer) but then I try and tell myself I am on this a lot and watch tv plus DS1 is incredible on the computer and has written code/computer programmes/games etc so it has been good for his development and learning options as well as his self esteem.

Sometime I feel I have been influenced by posters and not always for the better as it means I have trusted my own instincts a lot less.

outtolunchagain Sun 18-Aug-13 17:55:54

Really fed up today ,sick of running around cooking ,washing,cleaning shopping while they sit on their backsides doing nothing. Dh on holiday this week and has organised a few fun outings but you would think we had asked them to run a marathon the way they are behaving,if it doesn't include food or computers they are not interested hmm

In addition we are organising a once in a lifetime hokey at Xmas visiting relatives in another part of the world and all they can do is moan or look as about excited as a trip to the supermarket had been suggested confused

outtolunchagain Sun 18-Aug-13 17:56:31

Sorry not hokey , should have read holiday

CatsAndTheirPizza Sun 18-Aug-13 18:37:19

I'm not sure why people have such a downer on some games either. All three of my boys use Minecraft and use it to create amazing buildings all the time. I don't see how it can't be benefitting their little brains.

Mine craft is fine as games go. It's the sheer lengthy of time they spend on them. It's their bodies I worry about not their brains grin

mathanxiety Mon 19-Aug-13 01:48:25

Dementedma, yesterday, at the behest of DD2's hysterical request at about 12.45 am, I killed what we both thought was the biggest spider ever, only to discover it was DD2's eyelashes on the floor near her bed.

LOL at 'baby birds chirping for food' -- that is exactly how DS described them all when I got home from work a few weeks ago. They were congregated in the kitchen, having eaten their way through the fridge and all the boxes of crackers and breakfast cereal during the day and demolished a pan of brownies DD4 had made for herself.

I have to say though, I don't let people eat in their rooms.

Weirdly enough, they all shower.

Two of them off to university next week!!!
<fist pump, and yessssss>

alistron1 Mon 19-Aug-13 09:22:58

Last night I had a nice chat with DD2, she's on a 15 year old woe is me roll at the moment. She was very nice about it, but basically I have wasted my life and am very boring plus I'm rubbish at making hot chocolate. And she was very disappointed that her breakfast was late yesterday morning. You see I had the temerity to speak to MY mother on the phone. When DD2 is grown up I don't need to bother to phone her because she'll be too busy doing important stuff like making breakfast to talk.

It was a most instructive chat, and I am grateful to have the benefit of her advice ;)

Sparklingbrook Mon 19-Aug-13 09:39:08

DS1 (140 is up. shock And in the shower. shock shock This is not the norm. <mildly panics>

Poor you with your boring and wasted life alistron. sad

Sparklingbrook Mon 19-Aug-13 09:41:23

He's not 140 he's 14. I am 140. grin

outtolunchagain Mon 19-Aug-13 11:15:42

Alistron you have my sympathies , I am deputy head of finance for a fairly large charity however apparently I have wasted my degree from a top 4 University as all I do is basic data angry

Sparklingbrook Mon 19-Aug-13 11:16:57

DS1 has a paper round. He pointed out that he earns more than me. hmm

Parsnipcake Mon 19-Aug-13 12:08:10

So maybe he should buy you dinner/ pay for stuff? That will soon shut him up.

Sparklingbrook Mon 19-Aug-13 12:11:30

He wanted a KFC at the weekend. I said fine as long as he paid for it. suddenly he wasn't so keen.....

dementedma Mon 19-Aug-13 13:16:08

ah, i wish I was still young enough to know everything...

Sparklingbrook Funny how they have always "forgotten" their money when we are out and could I lend them some for a KFC? I always feel it would be mean to ask for the money back. i'm a soft touch aren't I?

Sparklingbrook Mon 19-Aug-13 14:50:42

DS1 is such a tightwad secret, the more he has the less he wants to spend. angry

Labro Mon 19-Aug-13 20:13:19

I've lent my 11yr old ds to his grandparents, as I have 3 brothers theres no chance of him winding my mother up!

alistron1 Mon 19-Aug-13 22:16:34

This evening my teens have been listing their various physical ailments. Between them they allegedly need cosmetic toe surgery, cosmetic dentistry and access to a ventilator.

They're still awake and I'm hiding in order to avoid being subjected to Lady GaGa's new video again.

CatsAndTheirPizza Mon 19-Aug-13 22:26:41

Feet. Can someone help me out here? He's not even a teen yet, but dear God [cheese]grin

alistron1 Mon 19-Aug-13 22:36:05

my 14 year old son's feet have grown at least 3 sizes in 12 months. He has spent this holiday learning how to pick things up and throw them with his toes - he'd like longer toes hence the cosmetic toe surgery.

alistron1 Mon 19-Aug-13 22:37:43

To be fair his flippers don't smell. And he regularly washes his hands and applies hand cream because it aids his gaming. And people say computer games are bad.

monikar Tue 20-Aug-13 10:53:22

And he regularly washes his hands and applies hand cream because it aids his gaming

This has made me laugh - I have heard it all now grin .

dementedma Tue 20-Aug-13 21:10:08

Ds is 11 and has feet like canal boats already. God knows what size they will be when he is finally done. They stink too!

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now