Did your teens turn out the way you thought they would?

[SnackJack]

Mine didn't

DS1 was always a quiet child, always saving up money, always looking for ways to earn more, always learning and looking for new things to learn about.

When he was under the age of 10 I always imagined him to be one of those teens that works hard to get good results and a good job.

However now that he's 17 I realise how wrong I was. It's a struggle to get him to do anything at all. He sits on the PC for hours and hours, never does his college work (is close to being thrown out), won't think about getting a part time job, he's very lazy and rude.

DD, I always thought she'd be a vet or something, she loved animals as a child, was obsessed with dogs and was always keen to help out with any pets. Now she's 15 she doesn't go to school, smokes pot, takes speed and can usually be found drunk on the sofa

DS2 is only 9 and I just don't want to think what will happen in the future.

[Doodle2U]

Rip out the computer. Computers and teens - man, I cannot tell you how much horror is being heaped on my DB and his partner with that combo. The feckin' PC rules the whole house. And then I hear "But they need it for school work....." - like hell they do. PC's available down the library.

Seriously, restrict screen time.

[brimfull]

My dd is 17 and has turned out as I thought.
She is a hard worker and bright at school.
I think her peer group has helped that .
D

Agree you need to break the PC .Then make him realise that he needs to work to afford another one.

Your dd smoke pot in the house ..sounds like she needs help .

[2shoes]

ds has turned out as expected, I lurve him.
but as with all 16 yr olds he can be a pain, then he looses his internet connection.

a 15 yr drunk and on drugs need serious help!

[themoon66]

DD turned out pretty much as I expected... a very tough cookie who takes no shit. Very sensible and is a bit of a 'mum' to her friends.

DS is very lazy now... he was a hard worker up to the age of about 14/15 when it all went down the drain and he discovered he can actually get away with doing very little.

[Saggarmakersbottomknocker]

I'm not sure I had expectations for my teens. I hoped that they'd get to 18 with no major traumas, that they'd have the confidence to do what they wanted to do, that they'd have morals, manners, good health.

We're pretty much there with ds1, he's 20 doing OK I think, fab work ethic, I'm pretty proud of him. Same with ds2, had his moments but on the whole is a good kid.

dd - like themoon66's - a tough cookie, takes no prisoners and has dealt with more than she should have to at her age. She's only 15 but will do OK I think.

Snack - I'm sorry that you're having it tough with your teens. I think your son sounds pretty typical - you probably need to lay the law down a bit with him and make him stand on his own two feet. dd sounds a different propostition. Are you getting any outside help with her? Education welfare, social services?

[Hassled]

DS1 was an easy-going, placid child who became a bit of a nightmare teenager. Always fine at home, but in a lot of trouble at school. Now he's 21 and is lovely again - very self-contained, which I worry about a bit, but motivated, thoughtful etc.

DD (still just a teen) has settled down as well, although she still has her moments - hang in there, SnackJack. Maturity comes to us all eventually.

[piscesmoon]

I find that very often they don't. We have lived in this area since mine were babies so it has been fascinating watching those from NCT groups etc grow up- and very often they are not what you expect!

[smudgethepuppydog]

Better I think.

DD dealt with some real crap in her early teen years but came out of it ok. She works hard in a caring profession and would make a tremendous sick children's nurse.

DS has ASD. He is now at college and doing really well after a miserable school career, where he hated school and all it represented.

[deste]

DS was very bright, had the reading age and inteligence way beyond his years. He was very good at sport but had to be pushed to finish his degree. On saying that has a vey good job, nice house car etc. DD was just average, very determined but into singing dancing acting out plays etc. She has a first class honours degree in musical theatre and is now an actress/singer in London. We knew that at the age of three that she would be on stage.

[Moski]

My 21-year-old DS has turned out better than I ever could have expected given his work habits, etc., when he is a teen. This gives me hope, which I need because I've still got 17 and 16 year old boys going through the "terrible teens"!