How do I help did with her time management?

(8 Posts)
welliesandsequins Sun 28-Aug-16 15:17:34

Dd is 14. In most respects she is absolutely lovely. But her time management is awful!
She can't prioritise at all. If we need to leave at a certain time she will fiddle around in her room until the last minute and then say 'oh I will be ready' but she is always 5-10 minutes late then she has always forgotten something etc.
She is the same with homework, or anything really. For example this summer she was meant to be painting her room. I haven't nagged her to do it as it was something she wanted to do. She goes back to school next week and hasn't even got the walls prepared yet. She won't have any time during term time to do this.
I can understand for school etc but she even does this when it is some where solve wants to go.
Obviously I can nag and nag at her. But it is not well received and, at 14, I feel I shouldn't have to.
The other thing I have done is tell her we are leaving a bit earlier than we are so she is ready when I want to go. This does work but of course it makes her think that leaving ten minutes 'late' all the time is ok.

And with her school work I think she needs to get herself sorted as she starts GCSEs this year.

How do I get her to prioritise what she has to do and stop procrastinating?!

welliesandsequins Sun 28-Aug-16 15:19:04

Dd not did! Bloody autocorrect!

INeedNewShoes Sun 28-Aug-16 15:24:14

I am 33 and I am the same as your DD. It has got worse over the years rather than better for me. I do everything at the last possible minute and it's a terrible way to function.

I'll be watching suggestions with interest.

specialsubject Sun 28-Aug-16 15:48:20

Point out that it is actually quite insulting. Shes perfectly capable of reading a clock and sorting herself out. To dump it all on you is treating you as inferior.

She can make a list of what needs doing when, and then tick it off.

Warn of consequences, then follow through. Let school punish for forgotten things .

welliesandsequins Sun 28-Aug-16 17:07:13

The thing is she does do them. It is just so last minute that, with school stuff, she could do better if she had more time.
I have talked to her about it until I am blue in the face. She knows the idea. She just doesn't do it.
I will have to go down the punishment route. I have done before but probably not consistently. I can take her iPad away on mornings that she is not ready for school. But when I try to stop the computer she insists there's homework she needs to do on it.
I was just hoping to be able to get her to self monitor I guess. Rather than me getting at her all the time.
As I said, she is great with everything else so it just seems such a silly thing that she/we can't get on top of this

INeedNewShoes Sun 28-Aug-16 17:32:45

It's a case of forming habits.

She has formed bad habits. The best way to improve things is to form good habits one step at a time and to break things down (where work is concerned) so that it doesn't seem overwhelming.

So, for example, I do wonder whether it would be worth you sitting with her for 15 minutes to get her started on a piece of homework, because starting is the hardest bit. Once she's made a good start, she may well of her own accord just get the task finished.

I know you shouldn't have to mollycoddle her through it, but it might be a worthwhile investment to establish some going homework practices.

With an imminent deadline, once something is urgent, I can achieve whatever I need to, but without that pressure I concentrate too much on the enormity of the task at hand and wanting to do it well. Once it reaches a point of 'you just have to bloody do something, anything' I'll work intensely to get something finished.

My procrastination habits are the absolute bane of my life. I get so annoyed with myself!

Sofiatheworst Sun 28-Aug-16 20:27:46

Watching this with interest as we have the same issue here, and I hate nagging. Good idea to sit with her to start off a piece of work smile

Leeds2 Sun 28-Aug-16 23:27:35

I would let her suffer the consequences at school if she submits work late, or not done to her best potential.

I also wouldn't nag her about her room. If she wants to do it, she will.

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