Daughter growing up

(5 Posts)
Ejc2016 Mon 18-Jul-16 21:42:25

My daughter is nearly 18 and gas net her first boyfriend who's great, but I'm finding it hard to adjust to her growing up and bring out a lot. It's been me and her for 14 years and now I feel a loss. Don't get me wrong I want her to be happy and experience life, but feel like I'm forgotten. Which I know is selfish. Feel lonely with it.

lljkk Tue 19-Jul-16 12:08:45

How much of a 'life' do you have without her? Can you develop it more?

Ejc2016 Tue 19-Jul-16 17:21:21

I work full time and have good friends but they are all married and kids younger so they don't understand or empathise.. We do meet up and do things. It's more the family aspect. Think cause it's been me and her for so long she's been my crutch. I'm not great at putting myself out there, lack confidence and self belief that people will find me interesting. I don't know how to rebuild it.

corythatwas Tue 19-Jul-16 19:25:29

What llkj said. The way to retain a good relationship with your adult children is to have an interesting life. Nothing is more exhausting than being close to a person who makes you guilty about growing up. The best way to show her that she need not feel guilty is to go out there and make that interesting life happen: find a hobby, volunteer doing something worthwhile, learn a new skill. Have something to talk about. Be busy. Don't think about whether people are going to like you or about whether you will make new friends: think about something you want to do. Then do it. And chances are you will make new and different friends. My dd is a year older than yours, my ds a couple of years younger: I have just started a project that will take care of my spare time for the foreseeable future.

lljkk Tue 19-Jul-16 19:36:12

I guess start where you can. You do it by doing it, iyswim.

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