How do I get through this?!

(6 Posts)
Parentofteen44 Tue 15-Mar-16 18:12:28

I am having the most difficult time I have ever had as a parent. Son is 25 and daughter 15. Daughter argues with me night and day and now there has been a terrible row with my son and we are not speaking. I am so tired. I know I have to keep on plodding on, but does anyone else sometimes wonder how you can keep the strength? I am really hurt, exhausted and a bit...wondering what it is all about. Spent 25 years doing this and all I get at the moment is criticism. I am so upset with my son I can't see how we can speak again...
The problem I have is that my ex and I do not get on and they favour him - whilst I do all the work.

I have a feeling I will be doing all this and they will just ignore me when they are older and go to see their dad and not nasty old 'brush teeth' me. I feel I have suffered for being the responsible one. It just isn't fair.

He is a pretty irresponsible father and yet - somehow - they prefer someone who let them play on 18 rated games at 12 and let them stay up all night (unbeknown to me).

I am so tired and fed up atm.

hugoagogo Tue 15-Mar-16 18:25:04

Do they both live with you full time?

My friend's daughter used to always think she would be happier with her dad: in the end her mum let her move in with him. The dd soon learnt that dad's house wasn't a holiday, she didn't last long iirc and her mum got a break! Would that be possible for you?

As for the 25 yr loss by chance they could move out?

Parentofteen44 Tue 15-Mar-16 18:42:27

The 25 year old lives with his girlfriend - but the argument was so bad and so final I am beginning to wonder what I have been doing for 25 years. He told me to F off. Never had that beforehand. We used to get on quite well, but he has got this girlfriend now and some horrible mates so apparently his mum is unnecessary. If he needs to tap anyone for money he can see his dad. I can't quite believe it. I am aghast. I don't bother him, but his behaviour was starting to irritate me and I did express a few annoyances over the last year. He is a disloyal, big headed, pain in the arse who thinks he knows everything tbh but I've never mentioned it. I really held my tongue until last year when he did a couple of couple of dreadfully disloyal things and I was too upset to contain it. I didn't think that a false situation going onwards was the right thing to do. We have tried to repair it, but nothing has changed and now he has told me to f off on the phone, blocked me on Facebook last year and posted something on Facebook saying how he had to make some changes so cut a few negatives out of his life - me apparently. Shame he didn't do that before I'd bought him the Galaxy Tab he'd wanted for Christmas just weeks before...really pissed off. Pardon my language.

Parentofteen44 Tue 15-Mar-16 18:44:25

Galaxy Tab cost £400 btw and, according to a source - he was slagging me off behind my back as he sweetly accepted it!!!!! Annoyed.

TheHobbitMum Tue 15-Mar-16 19:05:21

I've no advice but I'm sorry your going through this, it sounds awful sad Kids can be cruel and they'll realise at some point. Let your son know your always there for him and let him have his tantrum. Don't buy him anything else until he can treat you with respect. Hugs xx

Parentofteen44 Tue 15-Mar-16 19:34:18

Thank you.

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