how best to support DS, first big romance over

(5 Posts)
catkin14 Mon 14-Mar-16 21:53:28

DS & his Gf were together 2 years, now both 17 and she wants to expand her world (without him). He totally respects her decision but is devastated, she really helped him through my horrible divorce. He was close to her whole family and feels he has lost them.
6 weeks on now from the split he says all he feels is numb, no happiness or nothing.
I know (I hope) this will pass in time but how can I best support him? I wish it was as easy for him as kiss his knee and it will be better, but this was pretty full on for a first relationship and apart from talk with him when he wants to, I feel powerless to help.

stayathomegardener Mon 14-Mar-16 21:58:32

Distractions...
Holiday.
Pass driving test.
New Hobby.

And just listen to him.

scarlets Tue 15-Mar-16 21:41:41

I remember going through this myself. Only time helped. Eventually I met someone else. Encourage him to get out and about and keep busy.

mumslife Wed 16-Mar-16 07:12:58

my dd waa only with her boyfriend six months so nothing in comparison but she was devistated when he broke up with het mid Jan
Feelings she described to me were like you say numbness despair utter sadness. She really was grief stricken saying her heart actually ached.
She said she felt used (not the case with your son hopefully)and completely worthless and kept saying no one would want her etc etc. She could barely sleep or eat and her mental health generally was dreadful and she just kept crying and crying and saying ahe still loved him
Then she found out he had been lying to her about stuff important things and that seemed to be a kind of turning point and severed any romantic feelings for him
Fast forward two months later and she is a different girl. I was so worried as she is away ar uni
Things that helped for her were
Realising it was him with the issues as it were
Finally realising how much she put up with in the relatiinship and how unhappy and lonely it made her
Time
Keeping busy
Friends
Realising actyally yhere were lits of guys interested in her though she wasnt lol
Much to her surprise it is looking probable shr has met someone else! This wasnt planned as such and at first they were just friends but it looks like it could be something mire so watch this space
Your poor son hopefully time and keeping busy will help him

catkin14 Wed 16-Mar-16 22:32:48

Thanks for help, we had a chat and he seems a little better, bit more positive.
Ex gf now telling him her life is wonderful (now that she is single) which was a bit of kick in the teeth for him but he is focusing on his job and whole life that he has ahead of him.

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