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Dd14 sexting bf 15

9 replies

Fool4u · 06/10/2014 23:26

Went to say goodnight to Dd.. She was fast asleep.. Ipad was open.. I shouldn't have done it but I looked at their messages.. Dd & bf have been together 6 months & I genuinelly think the world of him & I know they adore each other.. But OMG the messages were so sexually explicit.. Proper sexting about what they want to do to each other.. I wish I could unsee it, but I cant..think I need to do something.. They're both too young & if they're sexting does that mean they're actually having sex as well??!!!

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MyballsareSandy · 07/10/2014 17:03

Oh dear. She's very young, have you talked to her yet?

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Fool4u · 07/10/2014 21:43

No she's been sick all day, but I will when she feels better.. Not quite sure how to broach the subject, because she's going to hate me for breaching her privacy

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MrsMinton · 07/10/2014 21:46

www.nspcc.org.uk/help-and-advice/for-parents/talking-about-sex/sexting/sexting_wda96795.html

This is very helpful in broaching the subject. There are similar things by childline too.

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Fool4u · 07/10/2014 21:54

Thank you that is useful. I foolishly hadn't thought of the wider implications of how those messages could be shared.. I was more concerned that the relationship was moving way too fast, which obviously I'm also still worried about

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MrsMinton · 07/10/2014 21:59

it must be a shock to find it but like this points out, teenagers are growing up thinking its normal to uses messages like this. I hope it's an easier conversation than you expect and that things are only verbally rushing ahead rather than physically.

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thatsnotmyrealname · 08/10/2014 11:40

I am in a very similar situation. Inadvertently saw a text conversation my daughter was having with a boy her age (14). Very unsettling. I don't know who my daughter is anymore, and not sure how to talk to her, about the sexting but also about the physical stuff.
Fool4U, did you manage to broach the subject with your daughter and how did it go?
Any help appreciated...

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Fool4u · 08/10/2014 19:18

No still haven't managed to have the talk yet.. She's had a nasty bug for the last 2 days & I didn't think it fair as she's been throwing up nearly hourly!

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Heyho111 · 09/10/2014 07:03

I totally agree with the above support but I would also think it's not Unfortunetly just talk. I would assume that they are sexually active. It's very common for teens to have sex at that age. It maybe worth discussing contraception etc aswell.
The good news about this is, is that they are discovering sex in a relationship where they both care for each other. This will have a reflection on future relationships.

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Fool4u · 09/10/2014 23:54

Ok so today was interesting.. She spoke to me today about one of her friends who sent pics to someone who then shared them about.. DD was horrified about it because she realised how quickly these things can spread & that also because she knows her friend trusted the person who spread the pictures .. Steep learning curve.. Saved me a difficult conversation .. My problem still is what do those type of conversations mean In the context of her relationship.. If they're talking that graphically are they likely to be having sex?