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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

Wasn't really sure where to put this...

21 replies

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 22:44

But as some of you may know I'm 14 (nearly 15) and recently I've been feeling really 'weird'. I go out with my friends in the day time from about 12 (or whenever i get up after that)till about 10/11 at night and i'm fine when i'm out with them really happy laughin and joking and whatever but when i get home i really change i just want to like cry and sit in my room the rest of the night and i think of like what has happened in the day thats good and manage to like change it to make it bad and stuff. I just want to cry all the time.
sorry i've gone on so long but i just wanted to know like what i can do to stop me feeling like htis and if anyone elses teens have gone through this does it get better with time TIA Dani xx

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colditz · 09/09/2006 22:50

Danielle, I spent a lot of my time as a teenager feeling utterly miserable. School is hard and so are hormones. A lot of adults forget that teenage hormones are like having PMT all the time.

so, unless this carries on for a very long time, or gets worse, treat yourself nicely and pretend you have pmt. If it does get worse, can you speak to your school guidance counceller? If not, everything you say to your gp must stay confidential by law, unless it is to do with child protection.

CountTo10 · 09/09/2006 22:51

I've got no experience of depression but it would certainly sound like you've got some issues there. Do you drink alcohol? That can cause highs and lows, I know it did it me when I was in my teens so I laid off of it. Have a look through the main topic headers as I know there's loads of threads in there re depression and it might give you some pointers or some good advice. Hope it all works out x

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 22:53

thanks Colditz
I've only started been like this recently (since i started hanging round with my new group of friends and i started goin out with my new boyfriend)

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DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 22:54

CountTo10 No i don't drink (i've seen what it can do to people especially round blackpool town centre on a friday or saturday night!) and thanks

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colditz · 09/09/2006 22:54

Do you use cannabis? That can cause mood swings.

are your friends all irritatingly gorgeous? Would give anyone a temper!

CountTo10 · 09/09/2006 22:54

Colditz is right, it is a difficult time and whilst going to a school counsellor or your GP might sound a bit daunting, it could be the best thing you've done - dealing with it at the beginning is a lot better than letting it spiral.

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 22:57

No i don't do anything like that drink/smoke/drugs Etc. but yeah my friends are irritatingly gorgeous especially this girl that i really like but thats a whole other thread lol. And if i still feel like this after next weekend i will go see my school nurse (she deals with like everything. thanks

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sallystrawberry · 09/09/2006 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 23:00

I write songs and i find that helps sometimes but sometimes it feels like writing it all out is like making it real and makes it worse but thnks

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CountTo10 · 09/09/2006 23:09

Its definitely a good outlet though - storing things up and trying to deal with them on your own can be very damaging. Being around new people and new boys can be very difficult and unsettling - there's always that intense feeling of wanting to be accepted etcc. I went through that and let it get out of hand. Hope this week is a little better for you and let us know how you get on

hester · 09/09/2006 23:27

Oh, Daniella, you've taken me right back to being 14. It's tough, isn't it? It strikes me that spending so much of each day with a new group of friends and with a boyfriend means that you're 'on' nearly all the time, having to keep up and be perky and - most tiringly of all - be cool enough to be in with your crowd. You probably get home and crash with exhaustion. My memory of being a teenager is also of a lot of peer pressure - having to pretend to be someone you're not really, or at least a version of you that isn't the full you - and keeping that up is exhausting and a bit depressing.

I promise you it DOES get better. Take care of yourself. Try to sleep and eat well. If it feels it's getting out of hand, seek professional help. This will pass, honest. xx

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 09/09/2006 23:38

Hiya

I was a nightmare when I was a teenager. I so wanted to be popular and attractive to boys etc but spent so long worrying about whether I had acted properly or said the right thing that I never really enjoyed myself! I would spend ages when I got home over analyising what id said and stuff, comparing what I was wearing to the what they were and then never feeling I measured up!

You say youve started hanging round with new friends? What happened to the old ones? Do you actually like these new people or are they just the sort of people you think you should be friends with? And the boyfriend - no pressure from him hopefully? Could any of this be making you miserable?

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 23:42

Hey tamba
I started hanging round with newfriends becaus ei started a new school last year (i moved from my old one cuase of bullying) and hung round with a group of people at my new school but recently ive realised i was trying to hard to fit in and started hanging round wit this new group caus i dont have to try as hard i just fit in if you get me and i do get along really well with them and like them My boyfriend is pressuring me at all he's letting me 'take the lead' and he knows i won't do anything really so i don't think it is either of them thanks

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TambaTheDragonSlayer · 09/09/2006 23:46

He sounds like a nice guy (Is he cute? lol)

Sounds like youve made a good decision re friends then. It took me years to realise I was hanging round with the wrong people for the wrong reasons IYSWIM (They were the popular group at school so I decided that I should be friends with them but I dont think they liked me very much and I never really trusted them)

They bullying thing sounds crap, Sounds like youve been through some big changes, moving schools under bad circumstances and its always hard starting at a new place!

I hated being 14 cause I felt grown up and my mom obviously didnt agree with me I hadnt even started my periods either which didnt help the 'wanting to be grown up and not being feeling' (I actually started at a friends house and her dad had to get me tampax but you didnt need to know that)

waterfalls · 09/09/2006 23:46

Hi DaniellaC

You mentioned there is a girl you really like but thats a whole new thread, is there some problem there that could be causing you to feel down?

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 09/09/2006 23:47

(Oh and getting up at mid-day??? Tsk! - although I can hardly talk - I am sooo not a morning person either )

TambaTheDragonSlayer · 09/09/2006 23:52

Although after the night ive had (seriously shit night!!!) being 14 sounds rather good! Am off to watch X-Facter, Perv on Simon Cowell, have a bath and try and de-stress before running off to Germany in the morning. Ah the quiet life....

Catch up with you later D

DaniellaC · 09/09/2006 23:53

Tamba lol thanks for all your help and cheering me up and yeha he is vute lol he's a model
Waterfalls i don't fink so i just really like her but i'm happy with my boyfriend so i dn't think so but i'm going to talk to her about it tmorrow

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alexsmum · 09/09/2006 23:57

being 14 is crap danielle.seriously! as someone said it's like having pmt all the time.
only problem is when you feel so bad it's easy to make bad choices which can then affect the rest of your life.

what do you do with your friends? maybe you could suggest some new stuff to do-going swimming or skating or having a game of tennis? we used to go to the ice rink a lot.The exercise and activity will really help boost your spirits.

fistfullofnappies · 09/09/2006 23:58

Hi Daniella
I think this is pretty normal. I certainly had mood swings and felt pretty much as you describe. my only tip is, Dont drink too much coffee/coke as they make the mood swings worse.

millions have been there before you, it will get better

theUrbanDryad · 11/09/2006 14:01

tamba - perv at simon cowell? ewww! heh heh....

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