How do I ask my mum if I'm allowed a boyfriend?

(11 Posts)
NervouslyConfused Thu 27-Feb-14 20:09:32

Some background. I'm 16 and in Year 12. I'd say I'm pretty hardworking, and I did well in my GCSEs. I'm currently studying for AS levels, and I want to go to university. I do go to parties, but I don't drink (tried it and hated it!) and don't have a boyfriend.

There is, however, a boy that I really like and have been good friends with for over a year. He has told me he likes me too.

What is a good way to broach to topic of being allowed a boyfriend with my mum? We're very close, but the topic of boys has never really come up, and I'm really nervous about asking her about it.

Tips? Thank you!

What are you currently allowed to do?

Go into town on your own? Go shopping/cinema?

Because going to McDonald's with a boyfriend is the same as with your mates.

NervouslyConfused Thu 27-Feb-14 20:14:57

I live in a big city, I go into the centre of town with friends, yes. I need to be home by 11, or have to sleepover at a (female) friend's house, and always have to tell my mum where/with whom I'll be.

FunkyBarnYard Thu 27-Feb-14 20:15:10

I didn't ask mine if I could have one?!

Was I supposed to?

NervouslyConfused Thu 27-Feb-14 20:15:53

If this is relevant, I am not allowed to go on holiday with friends this summer - my friends may be going to Amsterdam for 3 days.

NervouslyConfused Thu 27-Feb-14 20:16:38

Funky, my parents are quite strict, so I do want to ask.

CrazyOldCatLady Thu 27-Feb-14 20:17:43

I don't think that's something you need permission for, particularly not at 16!

JeanSeberg Thu 27-Feb-14 20:19:19

Why not just drop into the conversation that you're meeting 'John' in town one evening/weekend and take it from there?

DustyDaisy Thu 27-Feb-14 20:21:26

I can understand, I felt like this a bit with my parents.

Maybe tell your mum how glad you are that she is so easy to talk to, then just tell her what you have said here.

You sound very mature and hard working, I bet she'll be happy you have spoken to her.

At 16 yo, I don't think you need permission to have a boyfriend. Where and when you go out might be up for negotiation with your mum.

I like JeanSeberg's suggestion best for a conversation opener,

LynetteScavo Thu 27-Feb-14 20:30:32

Definitely just drop into conversation you are meeting X in town....X is picking you up to go to cinema, etc. (They will probably want to bet a glimpse of your bf, even if it's just answering the door to him) and go from there.

If it's any help, I wouldn't let my 16yo go on a long weekend to Amsterdam with her friends (you need to have met the friends I had when I was a teenager to understand why - we wouldn't have visited the Anne Frank Museum!) but I would have no problem with my 16 yo having a bf. (you wouldn't be having sex under my roof, though, thank you very much! grin)

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