My 15yr old son is ruling my life...

(77 Posts)
HDEnuff Wed 22-Jan-14 16:53:16

Help. This is a nightmare. How do I start...?? To get to right here, right now would take ages!!! Brief and basic - single mum til son was 10, he's now 15. Partner (of 5 years) has secured a job elsewhere. This means moving. Yes, horrendous timing. New job wasn't expected to become available for another few years, and if he hadn't taken it now, it could have been 25-30 years before it came up again. I have put my life on hold to stay here until son sits his exams in the summer. He was so upset at the thought of moving I had to do something. We agreed that if he could just consider the idea of moving that we would stay here til the summer hols at least. Lasr weekend we were supposed to visit my parents for the weekend - family live some distance away. He texted me to say that he didn't want to go. I replied that yes he was. He then said he would not be home that night and that he'd be home Sunday. There was more. He would not be moving full stop, he'd had a meeting with youth services who were looking into getting him into a flat or hostel. Boom. 15. Now, please, he does not come from an under privileged home, he is very bright and I was once a teenager also. I contacted the school. He had been to see his guidance teacher, and yes, they had rang youth services, but she has not encouraged him to do so. We have had meetings with guidance staff at the school, but son remains mute. Last night I asked him to write down his grievances to make things easier for him. On reading his grievances, it would appear that not only does the entire world, but the whole solar system itself, revolves around my boy! I'm so proud. Basically life is better without my partner here, he hates him, I care more about him than my son, the best thing about home is leaving it. In fact, his only suggestion on how to make his life better is to allow his girlfriend to sleep over...!! I feel like he has me over a barrel.

HDEnuff Tue 28-Jan-14 08:25:01

Posted that again?! Couldn't have done it if I'd tried! Thanks Ando. Yeah, am really trying not to push him. He's coming home tonight after 4-5 days space. Just scared he's gonna take off again the next time I ask him to go somewhere with us (ie. his grandparents, his aunties, his uncles), just because he doesn't want to/has plans. This whole situation stemmed from him not wanting to go to his grandparents for the weekend. Because it was boring. Half of me wants to tell him to man up...

HDEnuff Tue 28-Jan-14 08:25:02

Posted that again?! Couldn't have done it if I'd tried! Thanks Ando. Yeah, am really trying not to push him. He's coming home tonight after 4-5 days space. Just scared he's gonna take off again the next time I ask him to go somewhere with us (ie. his grandparents, his aunties, his uncles), just because he doesn't want to/has plans. This whole situation stemmed from him not wanting to go to his grandparents for the weekend. Because it was boring. Half of me wants to tell him to man up...

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