17 year old DD walked out in a row and won't come home

(4 Posts)
Scarey123 Thu 31-Oct-13 10:52:19

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

specialsubject Wed 30-Oct-13 20:58:12

no, violence is not the answer but there is also a concept of pushing too far.

it goes 'I'm sorry I slapped you but you have to understand that you are incredibly difficult to live with, I'm only human and I have my breaking point'.

good luck.

sashh Wed 30-Oct-13 13:03:26

I think you start by appologising for your own behaviour.

This is all she will be thinking about, she won't be thinking about what she has done, just what you have done. Teenagers are like that, they have a different thought process.

As far as she is concerned you have barged in to her room totally embarrassing her, then called her down stairs, embarrassing her more and then punched her.

I know you didn't punch her, but this is what a 17year old with a hangover will be telling everyone including herself.

Do you have rules in the house? If she doesn't have rules how does she know if she is breaking them? (again teenager point of view)

Also if I'd been allowed vodka and a boyfriend in my bedroom at 17 I would probably, scratch that, I would definitely be naked after a while.

I wouldn't do that now. I'm an adult, I consider other people and how my actions impact on them, I didn't at 17.

So IMHO

1) appologise, violence is never an answer
2) never try to argue with a drunk. Don't ask her to ask him anything. If you are not happy with him being naked in your house tell him to go.
3) talk about rules and expectations WITH her, not at her, not dictating but ask her what she thinks is reasonable, you might be surprised.

Scarey123 Wed 30-Oct-13 11:46:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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